Standard Disclaimer: I don't own Kim Possible or any related characters. Disney does.
This started life as a one-shot, and I gave in to requests to continue it. Whether that will turn out to be worth it or not remains to be seen...
And this is a kind of sweet/romantic take on the whole Mind-Control thing (which normally makes me groan), so if you're looking for... hot stuff... it ain't here.
You've probably been wondering what happened to me. Long story short: Drakken fired me. Black-balled me in the whole villian community, too. So I've been forceably retired, it seems. Lucky I have lots of savings to keep me living in style these last five months.
That fight in the Lair, a year ago. You know which one. The one I can't remember. I found the security-camera video of it. I know what happened. Dr. D says there's nothing that can be done, I'm going to be this way forever. That's why he fired me.
It's not your fault, I don't blame you. You didn't mean to throw me into the Hypno-Ray Gun, and it's not your fault that I hit it so hard it came on, zapping me point-blank.
I watched you as you were trying to figure out what it did to me. I could see that... you were actually kind of horrified that you could make me do anything you wanted. When Ron said you should turn me into a Good Guy and you actually refused because you said it wasn't right... I... Well...
Seven months we went on as usual. How many times did we fight in that seven months? I can't count 'em. And all the time I had no idea I was your slave. Slave. I got some good hits on you too, and you just took 'em when you didn't have to. Because, I guess, you thought it Wouldn't Be Right. I have to say, I'm amazed. If it had been YOU standing in front of the beam, I
Well, I wouldn't have been so nice.
Okay, so now you know I know. I don't dare talk to you in person, because you'll probably just make me forget again, and then I'd be out of a job and not even know why – well, until someone tells me, I guess.
So much for the easy part.
I'm writing to you because I have a problem. I can't hardly believe it myself. I'm out of the villian business now, whether I like it or not... so maybe...
I think you like me. I think you are -
I like you. Always did, but... you know, opposite sides and all...
Look: knowing you're my Mistress is turning me on so much I can't think straight. ( so to speak. Ha ha.) Seriously, though. It's just like, ALL THE TIME... and then I wonder if it's something you implanted into my mind – and I get even MORE turned on! It's getting... ridiculous...
You're probably thinking I'm such a sicko... yeah, well, you may be right. All I know is I have to try before I fucking explode or something.
If you want to talk – and promise not to make me forget what I know – meet me at the Mall, in front of Orange Julius, at 3pm tomorrow. By yourself.
If you don't come, I'll understand. Just... please don't come just to make me forget, like you'd be doing me a favor or something.
I really wish I could tell what you were thinking right now... I'm dying here...
Kim was working on her third Orange Julius when Shego saw her. She saw more, too... like Ron, in disguise, pretending to rifle through disks at the movie-store across the way. I TOLD her to come alone! Why'd she bring him? What's it mean? Should I call this whole thing off? Dammit, Kim! What are you doing! I suppose you intend to make me forget, too... She sighed. Well, if that was Kim's intention, then obviously she wasn't going to be interested in what Shego had been hoping for. Might as well get it over with.
She walked up to the table and sat down opposite the teen hero – her permanent Mistress – without saying a word.
Kim looked at her and then quickly away, also not speaking. She honestly had no idea what she was going to do... but she had arrived two hours early and waited this long to do it. There were so many ways... so many things that could go wrong...
"I said 'by yourself', Kimmie. Not 'with your sidekick'."
"I wish you'd call him 'Ron'" Kim said chewing her lower lip – it was a bad start, "Look, no offense, Shego, but you're an extremely dangerous woman, and you have extremely good reasons to hate my guts right now... so I... well -"
"I thought I told you... couldn't you tell from my letter -"
"You might have been lying. You've been known to trick me before."
She had a point there. From Kim's point of view, she had no particular reason to trust the ex-villian... perhaps even less now than ever before.
"So... make me tell you the truth, then" Shego said matter-of-factly.
"Shego... I don't... I'm not... I don't want to do things like that. It's just... wrong. I'd rather take my chances" Kim said, still unable to look her in the eye.
After a moment, Shego said, "Well, I'd rather you do that than wonder about me, I'm saying."
"No, wait a minute, Kim. This isn't going how I planned at all. I had everything I wanted to say all figured out, and now... now I can't remember a word of it. So, let's just start at the bottom and work our way up, okay?" She waited as Kim nodded her approval, "Okay. First, I'm bi-sexual, leaning towards women. And I'm seriously attracted to you. Your ball."
Now Kim looked up at her, at least briefly. That was awfully... to the point... Kim wasn't sure she could do that. Then again, in the past five months, with no sign of her arch-enemy, she had had a lot of time to think about Shego. Shego and... things...
"Uhm... same here. Except... well, not so much on the 'bi' part..." Kim's face flushed to outshine her red hair.
Shego closed her eyes and breathed a sigh of relief. If Kim hadn't said that – or something like that - it would all be over now. As it was, she tried to hide her smile – so that was how Kim Possible came out. "not so much on the 'bi' part..." God, how cute was that?!
"Okay. So... Second: I'm no longer in the villian business. I'm retired. All that stuff between us is history, right?"
"You're still a wanted criminal, Shego..."
"Yeah, well... maybe I'm willing to work on that. You could help – but, that's a whole 'nother ball game. Is it history between us or not? Your ball again."
Kim considered the implications. To be able to think of Shego as... just a woman, not her arch-nemisis, enemy, someone who wanted her out of the way. To see Shego that way was something Kim had been fantasizing about for years! But... to actually do it? And also... she wasn't "just a woman"... she was... she was Kim's...
Well, why not? What was the alternative? Haul her off to jail? Use her power over her to make her sit in a jail cell for the next... however many years? No. Some things were NOT possible, even for a Possible!
"Yeah. History. Uhm... I'm having a little trouble with something... don't... don't you hate my guts right now? I mean... considering..."
Shego leaned back in her chair. This was something she'd thought a lot about, and would be glad to get off her back.
"I did at first, Kimmie... I mean, seriously. Just like you're thinking, probably. After all, the only way I can be free of you is to kill you. Oh yeah, I started planning to do it, too... but I kept watching the tapes – watching how you wouldn't even go as far as to stop me from being 'a criminal', as you put it. When it was perfectly within your power, and pretty much your reason for doing what you do, anyway. But you didn't. In a way, it made me hate you even more, for awhile. Yeah, hate was like, Phase One. Phase Two was depression. Didn't help when Dr. D fired me. It was... pretty bad, actually."
Shego paused here, staring at Kim's drink, "Uhm, you gonna finish that? Getting kinna dry-mouth, here..."
"Oh... sure... help yourself" Kim said, a little surprised. Germ-sharing was Kim's version of "first base", however innocuous it might appear.
"Thanks" she downed half the glass, "So anyway, well, there were other phases: Resignation, Acceptance – fairly short ones. Then finally, uh... the phase I'm in now, apparently."
"Which is?" Kim asked, still to stunned to make any connections, but at least no longer too self-conscious to look directly at the other woman.
Shego smirked, "The sicko pervert phase, Pumpkin. What did you think I meant?"
"Y'know what? I'm gonna get one of these myself, they're pretty good. Maybe you should go tell the – Ron - that his services are no longer necessary. Well, if you want. God knows I'm not going to be telling you what to do!" she chuckled.
She actually chuckled.
Shego had joked about her... condition, with her reluctant Mistress! Kim couldn't believe it... she could not conceive how she could joke about it! The mere mention of... or thought about it, made Kim almost physically ill. If it had been her in that beam... and even if Shego had been "nice" about, Kim didn't know how she'd be able to stand it. And here was Shego joking about it... Kim sat there and thought about it.
When Shego came back, Kim had her question ready: "How can you possibly be so..." or perhaps not quite as ready as all that, "...so... so..."
"Cool with it?"
"Yeah, that's odd, isn't it? As near as I can figure, it's because you didn't try to change me. The look on your face... I could tell you wanted to, sort of... but just couldn't bring yourself to do it. It was hard for you to even make me forget what had happened."
She took a sip from her straw, and looked intently into Kim's green eyes, "If you can't trust Kim Possible, who can you trust? I trust you. I know it seems weird... but I do. I just can't imagine you... taking advantage of me. It's just not, heh, Possible. Get it?" Shego made a point of slurping loudly from her drink.
"You sure?" Kim asked. They were talking A LOT of trust, here...
Shego chuckled again, "Well, not absolutely, no. That's where the turn-on comes from. When I think about the things you could do to me... well... I get all hot and bothered, put it that way. You... uh... didn't implant that idea, did -"
"Shego! No! Gah!"
"Okay okay... just wondering" disappointment showed on her face for just a second, "Well, if you had, it would've been okay... I mean, I wouldn't be mad or anything. Just the opposite, in fact. That's really why I'm here..."
The high school cheerleader had heard of things like this, but she'd certainly never actually looked anything up about it, let alone considered herself for such a... situation. She did not understand it. Getting off on the idea of being helpless and... and possibly even abused? Kim shivered a little.
It was not a shiver of horror. It was a shiver made up of a lot of combined feelings, but not horror. It wasn't a shiver of cold, either, but her nipples stiffened anyway...
"So, I see you didn't get rid of the... of Ron. He's been pretending to read that DVD since I've been here."
"Thanks for not saying 'the sidekick' or 'the buffoon'. He really hates that, y'know" Kim replied, glad to put the discussion on safer ground.
Shego smirked in her trademark way, "Yeah, well, not my fault if you picked a... a... uhm..." She couldn't say it. Why couldn't she say...
(I wish you'd call him 'Ron'.)
Oh my... god... Shego thought as she realized she'd inadvertently – and helplessly – obeyed Kim's wish, Wait a minute. "A buffoon for a sidekick." Okay, I can THINK it... A rush of warmth filled her, and she felt slightly light-headed as she realized what had happened. She had to remember to breathe. This was the first time – as far as she could remember – she had actually felt what it was like to... be controlled, and she hadn't even realized it had happened. Oh, god... why does this get me SO fuckin' excited? She chuckled inwardly, I'm SUCH a perv! I love it!
Kim watched as Shego's face blushed with heat and her eyes glazed over.
"Uh, Shego? Something wrong? You look kind of... funny..."
"Um... well... uh..."
"... I'd rather not say... not here..."
"Shego! Tell me what's wrong!"
That did it.
"I just realized that I can't call Ron anything but 'Ron' because you said you wished I wouldn't, and it's making me, uh, well, wet myself." She did it to me AGAIN! "And now, you've also made me tell you what I didn't want to... And I'm getting kind of...dizzy..."
Kim's eyes widened in horror at the thought of what she'd so off-handedly done, "Oh, gawd! I'm sorry! I didn't mean... I never intended... I'm so sorry! You can call Ron anything you want to, okay? You can DO anything you want to! I... I didn't mean -"
"Calm down, Pumpkin!" Shego smiled at her, "It's okay! I'm not mad or anything... it's just... well, it feels..." She sighed heavily. Here, in the mall, in front of Orange Julius, she was more sexually excited than she'd ever felt in her life, and no relief was in sight.
But it seemed her words hadn't consoled her Mistress much, if at all, "Gawd, Shego... I didn't... I'll have to watch what I say... I mean, just saying 'I wish' was enough? I thought it would take... that it would have to be more explicit than that..."
"Yeah, I'd have thought so too" Shego replied, sounding almost... cheerfull about it, "I don't know exactly how it works. Maybe we should find out? Oh, hold on: your sidekick is a buffoon. Sorry, just checkin'... I don't really mean it, you know. He's okay, for a boy-scout."
"Yeah, he is. So... how do we find out how it works?"
"Well... how 'bout this: tell me to do something you don't mean, for a start."
Kim remained silent for a long time trying to think of something. Absolutely nothing was coming to her, though. The whole thing was too weird, too Drama, too hot... err, too perverse, that is...
"Pumpkin?" Shego asked, wondering what the hold-up was.
"Oh. Uh... kind of drawing a blank..."
"How about 'go jump in the lake'?"
"Uhm... okay: Shego? Go jump in the lake."
Shego waited for something to happen. Everything seemed perfectly normal...
"Well?" Kim asked.
"Nada. Probably because I know you don't mean it. Not to mention the closest lake is ten miles away... Well, how about something simple, like 'stand up', then..."
A hurt look crossed the redhead's face, "Are you sure you want to go through with this? I... I just have a problem with -"
Shego smiled at her – this was the very reason she could feel so 'cool with it',
"I know you do, Princess... Uhm, I'm sorry? It's because you do that I don't! See how it works? Now c'mon, let's try this. I wanna see... what happens."
Without looking at her, Kim said, "Stand up, Shego."
Whoa! That is SO weird! I don't even THINK of fighting it! Wow... As the realization of her helplessness sunk in, the warmth between her legs grew all that much warmer. Geez, I should have brought a change of underwear... Geez... she giggled to herself. She looked down at Kim, who was apparently trying to stare a hole through the table. "Okay, Mistress, you-"
"Do NOT call me MISTRESS!" Kim cried, a little too loud.
Stunned by the intensity of her reaction, Shego could only say, "You got it. Kim. Now I-"
Kim looked like she was almost ready to cry, "Shego... I didn't mean it like that! I meant, 'please don't call me'... I mean..."
"This is so GROSS! I can't even ASK you to do something without it being a damned ORDER!"
"I just want to be your GIRLFRIEND, is all! Not your 'Master' or 'Mistress' or ANYthing like that! Why can't we EVER-"
"- just have... uh... what?"
"Can I sit down now?"
The teenager hid her face in her hands, letting the weight of her head rest on her elbows on the table. "Oh gawd, Shego... I can't do this. Yeah, sit down. I mean – GOD! - sit, stand, do what you want! Call me anything you want to! I can't watch every thing I say, wondering if you're going to take it like it's... How can we be... together like that? Why would you even want to? If I were you, I'd be as far away from me as I could GET!"
Resuming her seat, Shego could see that Kim was in distress. This is too much for her... maybe I pushed things too fast. It was just that I thought it would be ME with the problem! I never thought she'd care about me... that... much... ohmygod...
"Pumpkin? Uh... maybe-"
Suddenly Kim dropped her hands from her face, revealing reddened eyes and a serious look, even if that look was still only at the table, "No! Shut up!"
Shego sat stunned. What just happened? Kim was angry? How did everything get so turned around, and so fast? And then the realization of the "shut up" hit her – she couldn't even try to tell her... ANYTHING! NO! KIM, WAIT!
While the older girl tried to come to grip with the radical change of situation, Kim was still talking, "I can't do this. I can't. It's not how... it's not how I ever wanted it to be... us to be. So... So..." She finally looked up into the worried eyes of her Slave, "I'm sorry, Shego. I... I'm really so sorry... I know I promised, by coming here, that I wouldn't do this..."
Shego's worried look turned to horror, and Kim saw it. Shego was terrified of her... Terrified! OF HER! In Kim's wildest dreams, in her deepest sub-conscious, she'd never thought she'd see a look like that in Shego's eyes. She would never forget it for the rest of her life. Kim's thought processes shut down at the sight, yet her mouth carried on -
"... but... I want... I order..."
Shego closed her eyes, unable to bear the thought of what was coming. To be so close, SO CLOSE to a relationship with Kim she'd barely dared to dream about, and have it taken away, and unable to do anything about it... far too much to bear. She hung her head, waiting for Life's biggest insult to date.
"... I order you... to..."
Kim saw a tear run down Shego's pale green cheek.
"... to... forget - ..." but finally, she just couldn't do it, "Oh god, Shego... I don't want to do this... I NEVER want to... hurt you.. EVER!"
The former thief looked back up at her Mistress, hope flickering in her eyes.
"And... I can't... I can't now. I... can't do it. I think I should – I really do, but I... Shego... oh..." Kim took a deep breath, and closed her eyes, re-opening them to find the other girl's green eyes still staring into hers.
"I'll do whatever you want, Shego. You just tell me what to do. I... I can't make the decision, this decision. I need... I need you to tell me what to do..." Kim said earnestly. But that wasn't really the whole story. Kim needed more than just that, but she was having trouble figuring out just what it was she did need...
"No. No... No, I just need you. Period. I never realized it until you disappeared. You know what they say... It's true... I never knew it until I thought you were gone." THAT was the whole story. "Tell me... tell me what to do... so we can be... together..."
Did that cancel the previous 'shut up'? Shego didn't know. And what would she say anyway, even if she could? What Kim needed right now was – what they BOTH needed right now was...
"Kimmie, let's both just think about things for awhile, okay? Let's meet back here in an hour... say, at four?" A little surprised she'd been able to say it after all, Shego waited for... for her... for her lover to collect herself.
Looking straight through Shego's eyes, Kim only nodded, got up, and left the table, slowly walking away. A little while later, Shego did the same.
At four o'clock, they RAN back into each other's arms.