A/N: This is the last chapter and I wrote it is written in the third person because I wanted to get everyone's thoughts in this one chapter.

"John we're going to be late" Ashley said. She was smiling, it was like any other New England Summer, hot and humid, her hair was blowing softly in the breeze. John was just leaving the house, he stood at the front door making sure it was locked. There was a sound of a car in the distance. He looked at Ashley she was still smiling. How he loved her smile. But then the next thing he knew she was on the ground. A bullet wound in her chest. He wasn't sure how he had gotten to her side but in the blink of an eye he was by her side holding her, stroking her hair.

"I… I never stopped loving you John even after you left" were the last words to ever leave her lips.

"NO… ASHLEY" John thrashed around in his sleep.

"John wake up" she watched as her husband suffered from his night terror. She shook him carefully. Finally his eyes shot open. But it wasn't Ashley staring back at him it was Maria.

"Where's Ashley?" he asked.

"John honey you're scaring me" Maria replied.

"No this isn't happening" John stumbled out of bed.

He tried to stand but his legs were like jello. So he crawled as far away as he could.


"John there is no Ashley" Maria said. She was kneeling next to him. She had one hand on each of his bare shoulders, she forced him to look at her.

"There is no Ashley" she repeated.

The shrill ring of a cell phone woke John up. He was lying in his locker room. He had this really bad headache and he must have fallen asleep.

"Hello" he said. He was still groggy and a little unsure of his surroundings.

His mother was on the other line and she sounded upset.

"Ma, what's wrong?" he asked his voice full of concern.

"She's gone"

The next thing he knew he was standing uncomfortably still watching a casket being lowered to the ground.

"Why did I ever leave" he silently asked himself.

Adrian embraced him.

"Addie it's been a long time" he found himself saying. Adrian stiffened when she heard him call her by her childhood nickname.

"Yes it has" Adrian replied.

"I can't believe she's gone" John said.

Adrian gave him a perplexed look. Was this not the same man who had left her twin sister heartbroken and barely able to survive at all? Childhood love was nothing more than a fairytale.

John watched as Maddie and Randy came up from behind Adrian.

"Madeline you are looking lovely as ever" John's attempt to lighten the mood went unnoticed.

Maddie was surprised he had shown up at all. But then again John never stopped amazing her. Maddie remembered when she had first met the man that she along with everyone else thought would be her brother-in-law. Maddie had no idea how to feel right now. All she could think about was the precious little miracle that was at home right now probably asleep.

"Addie is he bothering you?" Maddie asked.

"No it's alright Maddie we were just catching up" Adrian smiled weakly at her younger sister.

"Ok well I'll be heading home but before I do that I'm going to stop by mom and dad's…"

Adrian caught the hidden meaning of her sister's sentence. She nodded in understanding.

"Goodbye Maddie" John said.

"Bye asshole" Maddie replied.

John couldn't help but smirk because on any other set of circumstances Maddie would have whooped his ass and her calling him asshole was her way of proving it. John didn't deny that he deserved the ass kicking. He probably deserved an ass kicking everyday for the rest of his life for the way he messed up.

"I've been having the strangest dream for about a month now" John wasn't sure why he was telling Adrian this but he felt the need to.

"It's about…" he began but Adrian cut him off.

"I know what it is about" she said "what might have been"

"You know you never truly forget about your first true love" he scratched the back of his head.

"Why are you telling me all this?" Adrian asked. "We aren't friends… trust me we aren't even close"

"I know" John whispered. "how's your mom?"

"She's ok" Adrian said. "she's doing good considering her daughter just died"

"That probably wasn't the smartest question to ask" John said.

"Go back to your life John" Adrian said "we have everything under control down here"

"I can't" he said.

"Please John just go don't make this harder than it has to be" Adrian begged.

"I just realized Ashley's son is about 1 now" John said.

A fall day, playing in the leaves. Her hair smelled of strawberries and cream. That was the day she uttered the words that scared John to death.

"I'm pregnant". He remembered the way she looked as he called her a slut and walked away. Her tears were burned into his memory.

He knew she wasn't a slut and he never doubted the baby was his. He was just afraid of loosing everything he had worked so hard to achieve, his own selfish desires killed the only thing he had ever held dear to his heart. He had a 1 year old son that he knew nothing about.

"I know this is asking a lot but do you think maybe I could see him?" John asked. "just one more time"

"I'm only doing this because Ashley would have wanted me to" Adrian said. "write down your hotel and room number and I'll bring him over tomorrow"

John went to his car and found the pad of paper and pen that he kept there… just incase he got inspired to write a freestyle while he was stuck in traffic, you never know. He wrote down his information and handed it to her.

Adrian began to walk away.

"Addie, when you first walked over to me I thought you were her" John said "I was hoping that this was all a dream, but I guess not"

"Yeah I guess not" Adrian said.

The next day John was cursing himself for drinking too much the night before. He knew Adrian was bringing Boston over, this was just great he was seeing his son for the first time and he was hung over.

The thought that he was seeing his son for the first time was sobering.

"Well here goes nothing" he said to himself.

It was about 2:30 when he heard the knock on the door. He opened it and tried to smile at Adrian and Boston but he couldn't.

"Hi" he managed to say.

"Hi" Adrian replied politely.

He let them in. Adrian had a seat on the couch. Boston sat on her lap. There was no denying it now the little boy looked exactly like John.

'Is that a good or a bad thing' John thought.

"Boston can you say hi?" Adrian asked.

"Hi" Boston said.

"Do you know who this is?" Adrian asked Boston.

"Champ" Boston replied.

Adrian laughed weakly "Well at least he knows who you are"

"Yeah" John said sadly.

"Well I should be going" Adrian said.

"Wait? What?" John asked.

"I have to go" she said.

"What about Boston?" John asked.

"He's yours now" she said before leaving.

John banged his fists against the wall gently not to scare Boston. He had been outsmarted at his own game. He had left because he didn't want to be responsible for a child. But now he was but Ashley wasn't here anymore to help him. He was left alone just like she was.

The End… or is it?

Sucky ending I know but thanks for bearing with me. I promise the sequel will be better and all I have to say is expect the unexpected because you never know what I'll come up with. I wanna thank everyone who reviewed it means a lot. So if you are interested look out for What Hurts The Most.