High School Trauma

Full Summary: Sakura thought this would be just another boring, average school year. However,

the arrival of a few new students makes that quite impossible…

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or anything related to it, nor any of the brand names for

foods/clothes/ect. Only any of the relatively insignificant original characters I might use for filler

characters, and maybe a few of the places I may put in here.

-Key to dialogue-

"" Talking

'' Thinking

"" Inner-self talking through outer self

'' ' Inner-self thinking


Silence filled the room, permeated only by the occasional sound of the shifting of clothing as Sasuke fiddled around in his closet. It was a day off, so the boys had decided to hold a meeting to determine their next course of action in the war effort against Sakura. They had eventually settled into meeting at the Uchiha's home. And so, here they were. Neji sat in a meditative pose, his elbow braced against one knee as he held his chin with the cupped palm of that hand, his brow furrowed, mouth somewhere between a frown and an actual pout. Gaara, teeming with frustration, straddled a desk chain backward, his seafoam eyes glaring at nothing in particular as he thought.

"So... does anyone have an idea?" Neji asked, shattering the heavy silence.
Gaara raised his hand, receiving a nod.

"Kill her." Neji sighed.

"For the last time, we can't do that." He rubbed his temples a bit, then turned his gaze to the open closet door as the Uchiha stepped out. He had changed clothing, and now sported a dark blue half-tee that exposed just the right amount of his abs. A leather belt bearing an abstract red and black pattern adorned his waist, holding up a pair of form-fitting, tight denim jeans that had loose chains trailing from each pocket to somewhere below his knees. He had thrown on a white jacket vest that zipped, with loose chains joining the two sides so that the vest would not open too far when unzipped, though he left the vest unzipped. The back of the vest was decorated with a Japanese dragon rendered to appear like a black and purple ink painting. He topped himself off with a black muffler, wrapped loosely around his neck, the ends dangling haphazardly and reaching down to about his waist.

"Uh... what?" Sasuke asked as he admired himself in the mirror. He assumed his most emo pose, and a smirk creeped onto his face as he was apparently pleased with the reflected image.

"...Pinky. Revenge. Idea." Gaara supplied helpfully, his ire at the Uchiha evidenced by the slight growl in his speech. Neji nodded his affirmation.

"Oh that. Not a clue. But don't I just look absolutely fabulous?" He asked as he turned back to his partners in war. His question was greeted with silence. Twin gazes that were both annoyed and just slightly creeped out stared back at him. "...What?"

"...What the fuck? Dude..."
"...Are you queer?" Neji finished. Sasuke glared at them, growling low in his throat.

"Hell no!" He hissed lividly. "I'm not gay!" Both boys seemed to breath a sigh of relief. "...I'm bi." He huffed. Neji's eyebrow rose to his hairline, and Gaara's brow furrowed, and Sasuke gave a grunt, flipping his hair. "...There IS a difference." The boy's expressions became doubtful for a moment, and then carefully blanked as both gradually inched away from the Uchiha. "Psh. The hell you back away for? I could do MUCH better than either of you. You're not my types, anyway." And with that, the newly discovered fairy proudly strutted away from the profoundly disturbed and vaguely insulted pair, unaware of the section of toilet paper that trailed from the bottom of his boot.


Itachi sipped his tea as he waited patiently in the basement of his home for the others to arrive. Today would be their first meeting, so perhaps there would be some late arrivals. His gaze rose to the doorway at the top of the stairs as it opened, brighter lights from the room behind it shining through as someone stepped in. The arrival shut the door, and made his way down the steps.

"So, how the fuck are you, seriously?" Hidan asked, flashing a smirk. "This "Dead Poet Society" thing is gonna be a real fuckin' blast, right?" He dropped a large black garbage bag onto the floor, and it made a wet noise as it hit. Itachi's eyebrow rose imperceptibly.

"Hidan. You are dripping with blood." Itachi pointed out, gesturing at the blood on his clothes and the small puddles his footsteps left behind. "...What on earth were you doing?" Hidan smirked, proud of himself, kissing the pedant he wore.

"I rounded up the other members of the club, of course. Seriously. You should be fuckin' grateful." Itachi's eyebrow rose another fraction of an inch, and his elbows came to rest on the small table in front of him, his chin coming to rest on his hands as he interlaced his fingers, his gaze unwavering as he regarded the sadistic Jashinist.

"...Hidan... You did know that the Dead Poet Society is not actually supposed to be dead, didn't you...?"

"...Aw fuck."