Always Kiss Me Goodnight
Daphne's excited. She's always liked moving up in grades, convinced that the next years going to be better than the last and then she gets disappointed when it's not better. That it's the same – or worst. This years no difference. Moving up from a junior to a senior is big fucking news for her. She's more excited than ever, rambling for eternity about how fun this year will be. How different things are going to be. How everything's going to be a huge fucking blast. I'm not one to burst her bubble so I keep my mouth shut and agree with her when it's necessary. She'll find out for herself – this year won't be different.
"Back for another year in hell."
Daphne rolls her eyes at me as we step through the front doors of St. James. I'm being serious. St. James is hell and we both know it. Daphne just chooses to be more enthusiastic and less pessimistic about things. We both know, however, that I know she really agrees with me and that she's just too stubborn to agree with me with her voice. Pulling at my tie, I hate the fucking thing, we both head down the halls, schedules in our hands. Too be honest, I'm slightly nervous. I usually am at the start of the year…but only because I don't want to get shoved inside a locker my first day here. That'd be bad luck.
"Do you always have to be so,"
"Yeah, I do, Daph."
"Obviously. You should be excited, Jus! We're seniors. Do you know what that means?"
"One more year until we get out of hell?"
She rolls her eyes at me again and we're both relieved to see that we have lockers next to each other. Daphne smiles over at me. "See? It won't be too bad." It's my turn to roll my eyes. "You can determine an entire year by how are lockers are situated? Damn – you are good." She pushes me lightly on the shoulder, looks down at the scrap of paper in her hand and begins spinning in her combination. I don't bother opening my locker. We haven't gotten any of our books yet so I have nothing to put inside. She always opens her locker on the first day of school and then shuts it again after close inspection. Her locker door slams shut. I smirk.
"Is it everything you thought it would be?"
"Yes, it's a very nice locker."
"I'm happy for you."
"Shut up. What class do you have?"
I look down at my crumpled schedule.
"Me too! See, it's getting better and better."
"You're so retarded."
"Gee, thanks, Justin."
She shoves me on the shoulder again, grabs hold of my wrist, and practically drags me all the way to the literature room smiling as we go. I groan as she pushes me quite roughly inside the large classroom, teacher writing his name on the board with a black dry erase marker. Mr. Cato. He's new. Still holding tightly onto my wrist, Daphne leads us to two seats in the very back. I sigh with relief that she isn't going to make us sit in the very front like she usually does. Once we're seated we sit and talk. Well, Daphne talks about how, during the summer, she saw a boy, wanted said boy, and said boy became her boyfriend. The said boy's name would be Derek and she didn't waste time telling me how he "popped her cherry."
I've never met Derek and I don't think I want to. Well, I don't want to see the two of them together anyway because, well, I'm just not ready for hetero PDA. Especially between my best friend and some…guy. I look towards the door every few seconds, telling myself that I'm not jealous that Daphne has lost her virginity before me, waiting for her prince in shining armor to walk in. She practically squeals when he does and I can see why. He's pretty good looking. She smiles over at him and waves him over. I inwardly roll my eyes. Fuck – he can't come over here.
"Justin, this is Derek. Derek – Justin. He's my best-friend."
"Nice to meet you."
I offer him a nod and smile. That's all he's getting. Daphne bites her lip.
"Jus, you mind if I sit with Derek?"
"Sure. No problem."
She breaks out into a smile, leans over and kisses me on the cheek, and slides out of her seat and sits next to Derek at the table directly in front of me. I cringe when I see Derek's hand rest on her thigh. Gross. Sighing, I rest my chin in the palm of my hand and stare down at the black surface of the table, fingers tracing invisible patterns. Trying to find a way to amuse myself I guess. The door opens again and I look up, just curious to see who it is. If it's someone I know so they can sit next to me. Then I remember that Daphne is the only person I ever talk to at St. James. Except Chris Hobbs and I'm usually telling him to fuck off after he shoves me against a row of lockers or something.
I definitely don't know the gorgeous specimen that walks in.
His tall form pauses at the entrance, intense hazel eyes searching for a place to sit. I pray, hope, and beg God to make him sit here. I'm suddenly glad that Daphne abandoned me for her cherry popper because this guy needs to sit next to me. This gorgeous brunet just has to. His eyes meet mine and I hope I don't look as startled as I feel because I don't want to look like an idiot in front of him. A smirk on his face his form saunters over in my direction. I quickly look away so my eyes don't wander and stare back down at the surface of the desk. Like he would ever sit next to me anyway. I'm a loser. I'm anti-social. I'm un-popular.
Doesn't he know that by now? Probably.
"Is this seat taken?"
Blinking and licking my dry lips, I look back up from the table and slowly shake my head.
"Nope, feel free."
He sits down, his backpack placed on the table and looks over at me. He's so fucking…perfect. He's the most beautiful teen I've ever seen in my life.
He nods and the bell rings so there's no more room for talking and we tune in to class.
The first thing I think when I walk into my first period class is 'the blond kid is hot'. There's no way I'm going to pass up that empty chair and not sit next to him. And by the look on his face he's all too eager to let me sit next to him. Just my luck – the hottest student in the room is gay. Maybe St. James won't be so bad after all. It can't be any worst than my old school. And my old school sucked ass.
To make my day better – Taylor's in all my classes.
I made sure to sit next to him in each one. And he didn't seem to mind.
I wander around the halls looking for my locker when the last bell rings for the day. I don't want to go home. Most kids would want to go home after school but definitely not me. Drunk dads with rough abusive tactics and overly-religious-alcoholic mothers weren't the type of thing you would want to go home to. I feel slightly frustrated because I can't seem to find my fucking locker but it doesn't last long because I'm suddenly distracted by the sounds of scuffling feet, jeers from a rough male voice, and a locker door slamming open.
I move around the corner and witness a boy I don't know gripping onto Justin's tie and pushing him hard inside his locker. The blond tells him to fuck off and the boy replies with a leer and a taunt about flaunting homosexuality around all over the place. What a Fucktard. No one would've guessed that Justin was gay unless they were me because I'm on the one he has the blushing impediment with. The locker door is slammed shut and Justin is locked inside. The boy makes haste in leaving the scene of the crime and disappearing quite successfully. I walk closer to Justin's locker, hearing the boy kick and yell for the boy to come back so he can kick his ass.
This, if you ask me, would be pretty hard to do locked in a locker.
"Lockers are for your books, Taylor."
He's suddenly silent and then,
"Fuck you – help me out."
"My, my, we are rude aren't we? Sorry – my hands are full."
I'm not holding a damn thing but I'm sure it's pissing Justin off quite successfully.
"Well, you're getting better."
"I'd get on my hands and knees and beg but I don't have enough room, asshole."
"You could always get on your knees when I let you out."
He's silent and I can imagining him blushing on the other side of the metal locker door.
"Just let me out."
"Fuck – please."
"Alright, what's your combination."
I quickly put in the combination and swing open the locker door. He spills out, into me, and I wonder if he possibly does this on purpose. I decide not because Justin doesn't seem like the type of guy to throw himself at guys like that. He quickly pushes himself away from me, limbs stretching and eyes narrowing. He probably wants to really kick some ass right now.
"My pleasure, Taylor."
"Yeah, I'll bet you had a good laugh."
He smiles at me for a second and tilts his head to the side a little bit before he turns to leave.
"I guess I'll see you tomorrow."
"I guess you will."
He smiles one last time and turns around and I don't move until I can no longer see his retreating back. He has a nice ass, that's all I have to say.