Perrault looked at the cat in front of him, a slightly harried look on his face. "What did you say?"
"Tell me how." The orange tabby looked up at him with determined gray eyes.
"Look, I've got a marquisate to run, a farm boy to tell what to do, and some princess who assumes I'm going to help her find a bloody moon. I've no time for vague half wit cats who can't figure out something." Perrault turned on his heel and continued out of the room.
"One, I'm not a half wit cat. Two, a marquisate can deal without five minutes of your time. Three, a human can easily be taken care of with rope and a ransome note (people will let each other do nothing for years if they've been traumatized). Four, that princess is less important than me. And five, I am ceratainly not a vague half witted cat! I've all my wits about me, and probably some of yours! And I belive I've been rather articulate recently! So give me my entitled apologies, and teach me how to become human!" The tabby had appeared in the next room with eerie cat silence.
"I'm not a human. I'm a cat. Like you. Now, if you'll excuse me..." Perrault stalked off, stopping when he felt a weight on his coat. He sighed loudly and shrugged his coat off. "May I leave?"
"No. I want to know how you did it." The cat wriggled out from under the coat and blinked at Perrault with disdain.
"Just think human. Think stupid. Think letting me get to the rest of my day."
"Nice try." The cat closed her eyes for a moment, trying to think stupid, then opened them. "I'm too smart to be stupid."
"Your last comment begs to differ. Can I leave?"
"No. Tell me."
Perrault sighed. "Why on earth would you decide to be a human?"
"So I can manipulate people without them screaming that I'm a devil cat." Said cat blinked and added, "And so I can buy chocolate."
"Chocolate is a worthy cause. Think big, lumbering human, with a lesser IQ than your average rock." Perrault leaned against a wall, looking foreward to the cat's failed attempt at human. He was suprised by a slightly orange woman standing in front of him, looking more human than he. "Jaques? Fetch me one of Colette's dresses, and soon, please," he called, pointedly looking away.
The cat picked up Perrault's discarded coat and put it on. "I like this. No corsets or anything. Can human women wear these?" The cat turned around slowly, looking at the coat as it fluttered away from her.
"Not generally. Do you have a name?"
The cat stopped, thinking. "I don't think so... Will I need one?"
"Yes. How about..." The cat's fur reminded Perrault of November's hair. "October."
"Like the month."
"Do you have an idea?"
Jaques came into the room, looked from cat to cat, set down the dress (a dashing green and copper number), and left to inform Colette that another cat had entered the house.
October looked at the dress, happy with the colors, but not esthatic about the prospect of corsets. "Do you know how to work one of these things?"
"Please god, don't let her ask me that."
"I'll take that as a no. Keep not looking." In a moment, October handed Perrault his coat, and patted him once on the head. "Thank you." She kissed him. "That was my reason. Along with chocolate, but mostly that." She waved slightly, and left to find a mouse.
-Yeah, one of those grocery store presidents!
-Oooh... Logic fu!
-I love my attractive xylophone playing boys.
-I can die happy now!
-I loose my corsets... -You have corsets? Are you insane, woman?
Yes, fluffy as I'll get out, but meh.
This is Kali; sleep deprived and out and reminding youse to check out my other stuff.