AN: Its been a long time since i have updated, and unfortunately this is a cruddy rush job. I basically did this in all of 20 min. Sorry but i had to end it fast. I was getting very very bored with this, which is why it took me so long to update the fiction. I hope it provides some measure of enjoyment. I hope you will still review, though i dont imagine many of them will be good.
He had done it. She had seen him do that much. He had killed and taken life in the most cold-hearted and cruel way that didn't befit a man. Sousuke found himself thrown into a feral rage as his heart and his eyes went red with anger.
She knew he had killed before and that he would most likely be forced to kill again, but Kaname never imagined that she would bear witness to the ruthless slaughtering that took place in front of her. And it all started with the arrival of Sousuke's old comrade, Melissa Mao.
She had broken through Sousuke's home made traps after locating them in their hotel room. Unfortunately for the former sergeant, his ex-commander was not a very mild mannered woman in the least. Their reunion had been quick and painful, but Mao's softer side for Sousuke had eventually shown through.
Most men would never live long enough or avoid the emergency room long enough to learn that even that tough woman had a softer nurturing side. However Sousuke always knew, ever since the day he joined the elite SRT squad.
She always liked to treat Sousuke with kid gloves. Kid gloves wrapped in alcohol soaked barb wire but kid gloves nonetheless. The brainless sergeant never knew how to stand up for himself or write off the immature ploys his other comrade Kurz often played upon him. He was like the younger brother who thought it was expected that he should be the official prank monkey of the family.
However in every family with multiple children, there is always the eldest. The eldest rules with an iron fist and demands nothing short of perfection and discipline from their younger counterparts, however they are also the first to stand up for and spoil their little brother and sister rotten.
Mao always felt that need to protect Sousuke from the world while slowly introducing him to it at her pace while other members of the SRT squad would thrust him into whorehouses and bars in attempts to humiliate the veteran soldier further. Mao would help him in that big sister way. She would provide comfort and help him become the honorable man she knew he needed to be. And like any family member, she knew when to make herself scarce so she 'volunteered' to dispose of the body.
However there was only so much she could do to help Sousuke. Eventually he would have to enter the real world and learn to survive. Fortunately he didn't have to do it on his own. He had Kaname with him to show him how to be a gentleman and a soldier, no matter how much she disliked him being the latter.
It was hardly that she despised soldiers or the important work they do. Her own life experiences had shown her just why such people are necessary. It was just that she didn't want to be the one who constantly worries that one day her husba--, err her boyfriend won't make it back home.
It wasn't fair that he had to be the one who fought to protect the rights of people who didn't even want their god given rights and freedom. But Sousuke had once said something that had changed her mind right away.
"You do your best today and tomorrow the world may tear down your work. Do your best anyways."
He was always a peace loving man, so Kaname was hardly surprised when he quoted that source.
All that aside, its time to return to our current predicament.
As her next act as Sousuke Sagara's unofficial but beloved big sister, she would help him fight off this assassin that seemed so intent on taking his life. In fact her presence gave him the edge that would allow Sousuke to capture him and perform a quick yet brutal interrogation.
It would be the only way they would ever learn where this man came from or why he was after Sousuke. What harm could an ex-soldier with no real access to weapons be to anyone?
Sadly they would never know. The hitman had been trapped. In all truth he wasn't even that good. Mao alone was enough to take him down but their assailant had made one crucial mistake.
He leered over at Kaname as if she was a lonely dove waiting to be crushed and made one final attempt at a lunge in her direction. It was a look that Sousuke had seen him give. It met Sousuke's gaze of never-ending hatred.
It wasn't self-defense. It wasn't a soldier taking the life of an enemy on the battlefield. This was a cold blooded rage that resulted in to the mutilation of another human being. This was merely a snippet of Sousuke's dark past that Kaname finally got a chance to witness first hand.
He had lost his cool, lost his control over his emotional instability and it resulted with Kaname looking at him with terror streaking through her. Who was this person who was capable of causing such mayhem?
It couldn't be her Sousuke! Her Sousuke loved and protected her from the bad guys while maintaining a higher moral code because…because he was the good guy, and that's what the good guy is supposed to do.
No, that's what we want to the good guy to do. Everyone wants the hero to take the high road, but no one wants to see the dirty work needed to bring peace and justice.
This wasn't a side of himself that Sousuke had buried over the years, merely a part of himself that he had willingly hidden from Kaname.
He didn't want her to know that he could be so cruel, so inhuman like. That was why she continued to tremble as she watched a bloodstained Sousuke drop his combat knife to the floor.
He couldn't bear to bring his eyes up to her gaze though he could feel the weight of her stare upon him. It hurt. He felt exposed. He felt weak. Worse, he felt more vulnerable than he ever had before in his life.
It wasn't until this moment that he had shared every aspect of his life and personality to her. She had to know what exactly he was capable if he was thrust into some kind of harm. More importantly, what he was capable if Kaname was put in even the slightest amount of danger.
She watched him but didn't dare make a move closer in his direction. What was the appropriate way to act now? What should she say? How should she act? Should she just wait until Sousuke says or does something? It was all far too new and confusing for someone like herself.
There were no doubts as to how she felt about Sousuke. It was obvious such things were necessary for his line of work. It was just something that was kept shielded from her. It didn't change who he was or how they felt about each other.
But he was hurting and she could see that much clearly. Sousuke never did have much self-confidence, but unlike Kaname he wasn't able to put up this false aura that fooled the world. He needed her guiding hand to bring him back into the light.
"Sousuke…I …thank you." He quickly glanced up at her at the unexpected comment. He expected to hear how he was less than garbage, a monster that deserved to be shunned by society. That's how all the other civilians who had witnessed his handiwork had reacted.
"Chi-Kaname?" But Kaname Chidori was a different person. The truth never scared her.
"Sousuke, you saved me again. You saw him about to lunge at me. If he had gotten his hands on me, I might have-"
There was a quick rise in the tempo of his voice as the prospect of Kaname getting hurt once again crossed him. "Nothing will harm you!"
Kaname walked over to Sousuke but stood a mere foot away. She looked him over, a little afraid to get any closer with the blood of another soaked all over him. But that wasn't enough to keep her from Sousuke. She took the same knife he had just used and cut off the ruined shirt he now wore. With that out of the way she wrapped her arms tenderly around his body and felt the slight tremors he was hexed with.
All it took to calm his nerves was a few moments of Kaname holding and nurturing him to drive away the pain.
Tonight he would be cursed with the face of yet another nameless face whose life he had stolen. Again he would be haunted with the nightmares that stole his sleep and almost his sanity from him. But Sousuke could and would put up with all those tortured faces, so long as he could see Kaname's whenever his eyes opened.
"I know Sousuke, I know. You will always protect me, from whoever or whatever."
"Kaname, I'm a mon-"
"Person Sousuke. A good person. Someone who wants to protect and serve. You didn't kill that man until someone you loved was in danger."
"How can you still look at me like this? After you have seen what I've done?" He was whimpering almost like a little boy looking for acceptance, for understanding why he was being shown such compassion when he surely deserved none.
"Because Sousuke, that part of yourself is what makes up you. And don't you ever forget, I love you."
"I am supposed to be one of the good guys. The line, it's not clear anymore."
"What line is that Sousuke?"
"It's supposed to be as clear as day and night. The line that crosses over good and evil. But everyday that line gets smaller and smaller, and I am not sure where I stand."
"Sousuke, but you're a hero!"
"Can a man who has lived a life full of sin and death be called a hero for a single good dead?"
"You didn't live a life of sin and you have done many good deeds." Actually he was one of the sweetest, most innocently naïve boys Kaname had ever come across.
"Then I am to be blamed for a single mistake?" He let Kaname get to close to danger again. His single mistake was actually the result of a lifetime of errors.
"Will you just listen to me?"
"I came to close to crossing that line permanently Kaname. I don't know how you can stand to be near me right now." He felt like crying. He never had a woman who loved him the way Kaname did. It always hurt to lose something you have come to rely on and cherish so much.
"Because no matter what you do, you're still the same otaku nut I fell in love with in high school. You're still the same guy who likes to hold my hand whenever we walk anywhere together. You're still the same guy who holds the door open for a lady and stands up whenever one enters the room. Oh and you are still the same guy who cried at the movie we saw last week."
"Kaname!" he said with his face blushing profusely. There shouldn't be any need to make him even more vulnerable.
"The point is Sousuke, is that I am in love with you. Not your past. Not your actions. But you and who you are."
He loved her and she loved him. That was all they would ever need to face the aftermath of their decisions.
Worst ending ever. Anyways, the good news is that i have a lot of ideas for a new fmp style fictoin that will be much better in quality. One is a oneshot that should be coming up in about a week. AFter that i got a another fic whose storyline i am working on. I hope you guys like it once its released.
As always ,i hope you can provide your comments for this fiction. Thanks for being loyal. Until next time, take care.