Track 5: Forget Me Not.
Isn't it a shame, that when
timing's all wrong
You're doing what you never meant to,
There's always something that prevents you.
It's something strange to say after sex. Sirius stops searching for where his trousers fell, trying to get his wand or something to light his cig, turning to see over at Remus, who is now curled over his side.
He blinks. Remus voice had been calm, almost monotone, but he feels that there's more to it than a just two-words sentence.
"You don't… what?"
"Trust you." Remus says in the same tone of voice and it's then when Sirius flinches, because Remus' voice sounds so detached of everything, almost as if saying 'Why yes, Sirius, Snape really is a greasy git.'
"… we talked about it." He says finally, sitting over the bed, trying to see Remus's eyes but then there's something stopping him. Maybe it's the way Remus doesn't move, how his voice sounds so unbreakable.
"And then?" And then
he's getting angry. They talked. He apologized again, there were
tears and then frantic kisses and even more frantic tearing of
clothes until all there was were skin and sweat and semen and spit
and maybe even tears all wrapped in moans and their names. "What's
all this, then!"
Remus is still not looking at him. Some of the scars that were done by that faithful night in which a prank had gone too far
"I can't, Sirius. I'll have sex with you and I'll be there for you and I'll hear you but I can't trust you, not anymore." Then, after a few seconds had gone by. "Sorry."
Sirius doesn't say anything. He just stands up, yanks his pants and trousers up, grabs up a shirt that only later will he realize is Remus', picks up his wand and goes out of the room.