I know that I shouldn't write a new fanfic before I've finished Dimension 17, but I just couldn't resist. This is my first TMNT fanfic (well, to be honest I already have two, but they're not really mine since my sis wrote them). Please leave a review and tell me how I'm doing.
Disclaimer: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is a registered trademark by Mirage Studios, and I'm not claiming otherwise. I have no rights to the story 'Goldilocks and the Three Bears' either. I don't even own the small 'poem' Don will read out loud to Master Splinter, and I don't know who wrote it in first place.
This story takes place when our favourite reptiles are six years old.
Goldilocks and the Three Turtles
It was a rainy Thursday afternoon in November. You could tell that it rained by the fact that the water could be clearly heard when it ran down the sewers. Splinter was out looking for food and other things that were important for living, and as usual, the four turtles had been forbidden to leave the lair. They were bored. Bored with a capital B.
"Leo, there's nothing to do," whined Mike.
"I know," said Leo, annoyed. "What do you want me to do about it?"
"You always have such good ideas," answered his youngest brother. "You can come up with something to do. Please pretty please with sugar on top?"
"Mikey, I –"
"I know what we could do," interrupted Raph. "Let's go outside!"
"No Raph, Master Splinter said that we are not to leave the lair," Leo reminded him.
"C'mon Leo, Splinter wouldn't notice," said Raph. "We'll be out jus' for a few minutes. He won't know if we don't tell 'im!" He walked to the lair's entrance and stuck his head out.
"Raph, no, we cannot do that! Come back!" The oldest turtle grabbed his shoulder to drag him back, and a fight was on its way to break out, when Donny exclaimed: "Guys, cut it out! I have an idea!"
The blue and the red turtle stopped struggling with each other. "What?"
"Well, I was reading this newspaper," started Donny and showed them an old number of New York Times. "And there's this article about a school class that set up a theatre play."
He was met with three blank looks. "A what-now?"
'Uncultured dolts,' thought Donny and sighed. "A theatre play. You dress up as someone else, and then you stand on a scene and speaks funnily while pretending that you really are this other person, and everyone you know sit in the public applauding and one day you get an Oscar for Best Supporting Actor."
"Okay," said Leo warily, "I didn't understand a word, but I'm sure you're right, you usually are. But what's that got to do with us?"
"Don't you get it?" said Mike while a happy grin spread on his face. "Donny wants us to set up one of these theatre-thingies! We could dress up as humans and look really cool, and everyone would think that we were the greatest and then we would get a William –"
"An Oscar," corrected Raph, who wasn't really interested but at least paid attention.
"Oscar, William, whatever – because we'd be so good."
"Well," said Donny, "I'm not so sure about us getting an Oscar, but at least you're right about us playing theatre. We could show it to Master Splinter. I'm sure he'd like it."
"But as far as I understand, we need some kind of story," said Leo uncertainly. "How do you suggest…?"
"I thought about using one of the fairy tales from the book Sensei found at the dump." Don held up a big, green book with the title Fairy Tales Around the World. "There are tons of stories here! 'Cinderella', 'Aladdin', 'The Emperor's New Clothes'… We just have to pick one!"
"Are there any stories with turtles in it?" asked Mikey. Splinter and Donny (since he was the only turtle that could read) had read some of the stories loud, but certainly not all of them.
"I'm afraid not," answered Don. "We just have to find one with four characters." He started flipping through the pages.
"So, do you know if there's such a fairy tale in that book?" Raph didn't seem very convinced.
"I'm sure there must be at least one…" Don frowned as he tried to find a fitting story – of course, he had already read through the whole book, but he couldn't remember everything. "'Beauty and the Beast'? Too complicated. 'Hansel and Gretel'? Too few characters. 'Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs'? Too many characters – plus, I doubt that anyone of us would like to dress up like Snow White or the evil queen anyway… Ah, here's one: 'Goldilocks and the Three Bears'."
"Excuse me?" Raph's eyes widened in disbelief. "'Goldilocks an' the Three Bears'? Goldilocks?"
Donny sighed – he should have understood that Raph wouldn't like it. "It's about this little girl that goes for a walk in the forest and stumbles upon a house where three bears live, but she doesn't know that until they catch her sleeping in one of their beds."
Leo raised his eye ridges and Raph made a face, but Mike looked totally into the idea. "Oh, can we do it, Raph, Leo? Please!"
"I will not dress up as a little girl," said Raph and crossed his arms. "No way. I won't do it." He looked to Leo, who also seemed doubtful, to get some help.
"You don't have to play Goldilocks. I'll do it. Can I? Can I? Can I?" Mike used his best puppy dog eyes to get Raph and Leo to understand that this theatre thing really was a brilliant idea.
Leo could feel his willpower starting to fall apart. 'Darn those eyes!' he thought. Then he sighed. "Alright, Mikey. We'll do it… If it's okay with Raph, of course."
Raphael didn't like being the one that had to make the decision. He didn't want to do this, but he could tell that his siblings would get very disappointed if he didn't agree to Don's suggestion – even though he kept to his 'bad boy attitude', he hated seeing his brothers sad. Especially Mikey.
"Okay," he sighed. "Let's do it. But I do not wanna play Goldilocks."
Mike beamed at him.
Splinter could tell that his sons were up to something. They had lively been discussing something when he got back from the dump, but when he entered the room they stopped talking as fast as if someone had pressed a button. When he looked at them quizzically, they just smiled at him. Later, he discovered that some of the yellow yarn he kept in a cupboard was gone (Splinter was actually quite good at knitting, although it just became blankets for his sons during the winter. You didn't know that, now did you?). He asked the turtles about it, but they looked at him with their most innocent faces and denied any knowledge about the missing yarn. The giant rat didn't really trust them, but knew that they would tell him if there actually was something serious to worry about. 'They would not keep quiet about this if they hadn't a good reason', he thought, and let them be – although he was really curious.
"Okay Mikey, it's your line."
"Right. Eh… 'Ugh, there is too much salt on these popcorns.'"
"No, no, no!" Donatello had taken the role of the director, since he knew more about theatre than the others (but not very much more). He also played the roles of Goldilocks' mother and Baby Bear. Raph had the role of Father Bear, while Leo was Mother Bear. Truth to be told, he'd rather be Father Bear, but Raph refused to participate if he didn't get the role of the biggest – and undoubtedly strongest and most dangerous – bear, so Leo had to give in.
Right now, Donny felt quite desperate. He wasn't sure if Michelangelo was saying his lines wrong just to tease him, or if he really had no theatre talent whatsoever. "Porridge, not popcorn. Porridge. I mean think about it – what would it look like if the three bears ate popcorn?"
"But popcorn tastes better. And anyway, they both start with a 'P'."
"Yeah yeah, whatever," sighed Donny and gave up. "If it's so hard for you to say 'porridge', then say popcorn. Leo, Raph, there's been a change in the script because of Mike's inability to say 'porridge'."
Raph and Leo sighed, while Mikey grinned. Although he had this little (or big?) tendency to come up with his own lines and actions and push Don to the line of insanity, it was clear that he enjoyed plying theatre and being Goldilocks in the wig Don had made of the yellow yarn.
"Okay Mikey, get on with the play."
Mike cleared his throat. "Ugh, there is too much salt on these popcorns. I better try the next bowl." He took a spoon and pretended to fill it with something from one of the empty bowls they'd taken from the kitchen. He then put the spoon in his mouth, only to spit the imaginary popcorns out again. "Ahh! These popcorns are way too hot!" He then ran a few steps and pretended to gulp down water from an invisible tap. His brothers frowned, and Don wondered – for the sixty-seventh time – 'Why didn't I see this coming?'
At last, Michelangelo went back to the 'table' and picked up the last bowl. "Ahh, these popcorns are delicious!" He stuffed himself full of imaginary popcorn, and rubbed his stomach. "I ain't hungry anymore, so I think I should take a little nap."
The youngest turtle then jumped down onto one of the three yellow blankets on the floor and attempted to bounce up and down. "This bed is way too hard for my sensitive little human girl's body!" (AN: Ugh, that sounded dirty…) He jumped onto the second blanket, and bounced a bit more. "And this bed is too soft!" So he changed to the third blanket. "Now this felt comfy!" He pretended to fall asleep.
Donatello sighed with relief, happy that Michelangelo's little monologue was over. "Okay guys, now it's time for the bear family to enter!"
The three oldest turtles went up to the space of the 'stage' that was supposed to be the bears' cottage. Raph went first, since he was Father Bear, then Leo as Mother Bear, and lastly Don as Baby Bear.
"Hey! Someone's been tastin' my dinner!" Raph growled.
"Someone has been tasting my dinner!" continued Leo, in, what he hoped, was a feminine tone.
"Someone has eaten my dinner!" ended Donny, and tried to sound like a child – which wasn't very hard, since he was one.
The three turtles then turned to the yellow blankets on the floor.
"Someone's been jumpin' on my bed!"
"Someone has been jumping on my bed!"
"Someone is asleep in my bed!"
Mikey 'woke up' at this, and yawned. "My, that's what I call a good night's sleep!"
He then saw his older brothers, and his eyes widened. "EEEEEEEEEEEEEKKKKK! Three gigantic bears! I better get the shell outta here!"
He got up from the blanket and ran out of the room before his purple-clad brother could stop him. Don had to call him back. "Mikey! Come back! You're not supposed to leave the room, only the scene!"
Michelangelo entered the room again. "Sorry. But I really made a superb exit, now didn't I?"
A couple of weeks later, Splinter sat in his rocking chair, reading a collection of Japanese poems. Suddenly, he felt a tug on his kimono. When he looked down, he saw all his four sons looking up at him. "Yes?"
"We have something to show you, Master Splinter," said Leonardo.
"It's a SECRET!" squealed Michelangelo and bounced up and down. "We've been working on it for MONTHS!"
"Or at least for three weeks," Donatello mumbled.
"It's in the big room," Raphael said. "Please come!"
Splinter raised an eyebrow. 'I guess that it is time to find out what my sons have been up to.' He rose from his rocking chair. "Yes, my sons, I shall come and watch your… eh… secret." The youngest turtle had a steady grip on his kimono and practically dragged his sensei to what they called 'the big room'.
"Sit there, Sensei!"
Splinter obeyed and sat down in the armchair. He looked around the room. Before him, the furniture had been moved away to reveal an empty space on the floor. There lay three bowls, three spoons and three blankets. On the right side, a large white bed sheet had been hung up between the closet and a hook on the wall. This created a small space where the little reptilians could 'hide' away from their father's looks.
The sound of someone clearing his little throat got Splinter's attention. His four students stood in a line before him. Donny spoke. "Master Splinter, we've set up a theatre play which we'd like to show to you. It's 'Goldilocks and the Three Bears'. We've been rehearsing it for several weeks."
Splinter raised his eyebrows. 'So that is what they have been so secretive about!'
Leo, Raph and Mikey disappeared behind the bed sheet. Don remained on the spot. He seemed quite nervous. "Well, let's get started then… You see, Sensei, I'll begin with a poem."
Splinter nodded encouragingly.
'Suppose you found a cottage small,
With roses growing up the wall,
Suppose the door was open wide –
I wonder – would you look inside?'"
Splinter clapped his hands, but stopped when Mike popped his head out from behind the bed sheet and hissed: "Not yet!"
'Sorry,' mimed the rodent as Donatello, as well, disappeared behind the sheet. He came out a few seconds later, a blue apron tied around his waist. The youngest turtle followed him, with a bunch of something yellow that was meant to look like hair on his head. Splinter's eyes widened. 'There is the yarn I have been looking for!'
"Mom, I want to go for a walk in the forest," whined Michelangelo.
"Alright, Goldilocks, but make sure that you're home for dinner," answered Don in a falsetto voice. Mike nodded, whereupon Don returned 'backstage' (behind the bed sheet, that is). He got a little extra speed when he tripped over the ridiculously large apron and stumbled two or three steps.
The yarn-wearing turtle strutted around on the scene for a minute, while humming on something unmusical. Suddenly, he stopped. "Look, a little cottage which I have never seen before, even though I've been running around this forest for my whole life!" Three groans were heard from behind the bed sheet. Michelangelo sat down on the floor and picked up one of the bowls. He took a spoon and pretended to fill it with something from the bowl. He then put the spoon in his mouth and made a face. "Ugh, there is too much salt on these peppermint tablets!"
'Backstage', someone whispered loudly: "Popcorn, Mikey! Popcorn!"
"What?" Mike asked, offended, and turned to the bed sheet. "Who cares? I mean, they both start with a 'P', right?"
Splinter raised an eyebrow as the bed sheet started moving, as if there was a struggle behind it. He could hear muffled voices.
"Lemme go! I wanna kill 'im!"
Donatello emerged and sent Splinter an apologetic smile when he rushed over to Goldilocks and crouched. "Mikey, you are not supposed to start talking to us when we're backstage! You're dropping your role! Just pretend that you cannot hear us!" he hissed. Before Mike could answer, Donny hurried back over the scene, just getting the time to send Splinter apologetic smile number two before he went out of sight again.
The main character in the play cleared his throat. "Ugh, there is too much salt on these popcorns." He then put the second spoon in his mouth, after putting it in another bowl. His eyes widened. "Ahh! These popcorn are way too hot!" Then he repeated what he'd done while rehearsing – pretended to gulp down water from an imaginary tap. After he settled down once more, he 'tasted' what was in the third bowl. "Now this is delicious!"
After bouncing on bed number one and two, he jumped onto the third one. "Now this felt comfy!" He 'fell asleep'.
Now, the three 'bears' emerged from 'backstage'. The oldest turtles were wearing masks which had been painted brown. Raphael's mask had its teeth exposed in a threatening expression. The lips that were painted on Leonardo's mask had lipstick on them (gosh, did his brothers tease him about that – and it wasn't even his idea in the first place, but Michelangelo's), while Donatello's looked, well, kind of 'normal'.
Raph opened his mouth behind the mask. "Someone's been tastin' my dinner!"
"Someone has been tasting my dinner!" Splinter tried not to smile at his oldest son's desperate attempt to sound like a woman.
"Someone has eaten my dinner!"
The bear family turned to the blankets on the floor and Raph prepared to talk again. "Someone's been jumpin' –"
Four pairs of eyes stared at Goldilocks.
"Oh my gosh," mumbled Donatello. "He's fallen asleep for real."
"Mikey!" hissed Father Bear and nudged his sleeping brother with his foot (he couldn't kick him, since Splinter was in the room), while Mother Bear and Baby Bear cast nervous looks at their sensei. Mike opened his eyes.
"Yeah what is it?" he asked groggily.
"You're snoring in the middle on the play!"
"Sorry." He closed his eyes, and Raph took up where he left. "Someone's been jumpin' on my bed!"
"Someone has been jumping on my bed!" said Leonardo.
"Someone is –"
"– asleep in my bed…"
This time, nothing could stop Father Bear from kicking his little brother hard in his side. Mike woke up with a start, immediately understood the situation, squealed, and tried to leave the scene at breakneck pace – only to discover that he had lay down on his shell and now had serious problems getting up. The pathetic sight of Goldilocks on the floor, rocking back and forth on his shell, became the last straw for Donatello.
"Okay! That's it! I give up! I will never, EVER again mention the word of 'theatre'! NEVER! I can't take it anymore! Sayonara, folks, I'm off to join the circus!"
He kept talking while setting for the door, but a furry hand stopped him. The purple-clad turtle looked up into the eyes of his father.
"Donatello, I can honestly say that this is the best theatre play that I have ever watched. You have done a great job, all of you." He turned to the rest of his sons, who were still on the stage, Leo and Raph helping Mikey to get up. "Even if there might have been some errors, I appreciate your efforts to go through with this project, just to surprise me. The mere fact that you tried is worth more than every perfect performance in the entire world."
His four students blushed, and Donatello smiled a little. 'Maybe this whole theatre thing wasn't such a bad idea after all.'
So, what do you think? Please leave a review!