This is going to be a series of nine one shot stories centered around Jack Fenton. More A/N at the end.
Disclaimer: I do not nor will I ever own Danny Phantom or the related characters. I do own a tee shirt though, so I'm happy.
Yes, this is supposed to be a little random.
Nine Tales O'Jack
Jack Fenton was a man with a weakness, and that weakness was called fudge. He didn't care what kind it was, be it white chocolate fudge, peanut butter fudge, raspberry chocolate fudge or classic creamy chocolate fudge, he loved it all, in vast quantities.
It had been a joke for sometime within the Fenton household that if the fudge industry ever went bust, that Jack himself would be able to resurrect it himself by the sheer force of his cravings for the creamy, delicious confection.
This is a tale which almost caused Jack Fenton to swear off fudge forever, this is the tale of Ecto-fudge!
"Dude," Tucker Foley said as he leaned and whispered to Danny. "Since when does your father talk about himself in third person."
Daniel Fenton, fourteen year old son of Jack Fenton leaned on his hand and looked at his friend tiredly. "Only when he's gearing up to tell a very long, boring story," he answered.
"Oh kill me now," Sam said as she laid her head on the table.
The story begins during a hot summer day, when all of the Fenton family, save Jack had abandoned Fenton Works for more exciting climes.
"Hooray for Floody Waters," Danny said as he threw his arms in the air, then closed his mouth as Jack raised his eyebrow at his son and placed his hands back in his lap and tried to look chastised.
Since Jack's wife, the beautiful, brainy, talented Maddie Fenton was out of the house, Jack decided that it would be the perfect time to experiment on a recipe which had been rattling around in Jack's brain for a long time.
"We wondered what that noise was," Danny said to Tucker.
But, Maddie would never allow her husband into the kitchen for such an experiment. Since she wasn't around to say no, Jack decided the answer was yes!
"Just say no," Sam said as she shook her head. "Say no to fudge." Danny shot her a strange look and she smiled and shrugged.
For some time, Jack had been thinking of ways to improve the creamy and wonderful goodness of fudge, so he stole into the kitchen armed with all the proper ingredients
"He's going to give us the entire list of ingredients, isn't he?" Tucker asked almost worriedly.
"Yup," Danny said as he continued to sit at the table with his head resting on his hand."
"Really," Sam said. "Kill me now. I mean it."
Jack gathered together sugar, cream, corn syrup, unsweetened chocolate, semi-sweet chocolate, butter, vanilla and a large jar of ectoplasam and put them on the table!
"Where they started to dance a little jig," Sam whispered to Danny who elbowed her and told her to be quiet.
"Don't encourage him Sam. You'll make this story longer than it has to be."
"Oh!" Sam said as she widened her eyes. "Sorry."
It is important to cook your fudge over low heat, and Jack knew this because he had been through the fudge making process many times and learned the hard way that scorched fudge does not taste good.
"A little like cooked rubber boots," Danny said.
"How do you know what cooked rubber boots taste like?" Tucker asked. Danny rolled his eyes and sighed.
"That's what he had for dinner last night," Sam answered. Danny snorted.
After Jack had nearly finished the fudge, which would have been award winning on it's own, he added two ounces of fresh ectoplasm.
"And we all know what happens when you heat up ectoplasm," Tucker sighed.
The pan of fudge began to rattle, shake and then screamed. Jack jumped back shouting in horror as the confection took on a eerie green glow, grew sharp fangs and glowing red eyes. He tried to fend off the green goo by attacking it with a whisk.
"I bet he screamed like a girl," Tucker remarked.
"You scream like a girl," Danny teased.
"Shut up guys," Sam said sarcastically, "He's probably going to quiz us on this."
"Ooo," Danny said as he grimaced and rubbed the back of his neck nervously. "You're probably right.
Jack learned quickly that a flimsy wire whisk is a poor weapon against a hot, oozing pile of ectoplasmic fudge.
"Ya think?" Danny said as he snickered to himself. Tucker made a shushing noise, and Sam laughed.
The steaming pile of creamy goodness gone bad chased poor Jack Fenton around the kitchen until an idea hit him. What is the opposite of fudge?.
The three friends looked at each other questioningly. All three blinking in worry as they looked at Jack, who was looking back expecting an answer.
"Lemonade?" Tucker asked.
"Turkey," Danny said.
"Turkey?" Tucker replied. "Why turkey?"
"I wasn't answering Turkey," Danny clarified. "I was calling you a turkey."
"Oh!" Tucker said than laughed weakly. "You're so witty Danny."
"Just like his father," Sam said dryly which gained a look of horror from Danny.
The opposite of fudge is not fudge! So Jack grabbed a sauce pan and began hitting the fearsome ecto-fudge creature with the device. Unfortunately, the fudge creature had gained some sort of power after the attack with the whisk and it promptly devoured the pan.
"The opposite of fudge is not fudge?" Sam asked as she shook her head. "That doesn't make sense. That's like saying the opposite of dark is not dark."
"Well technically," Tucker interrupted. "That would be true, because if it's not dark it's light and light is the opposite of dark."
"Shut up Tucker," Sam and Danny said in unison.
Jack did not relish the thought of having to tell his beautiful and sweet wife, Maddie that along with her favorite cooking utensils, but her adoring husband had been devoured by an evil ecto-fudge creature.
"Yeah," Sam said. "It would be a little hard to explain how and why you were devoured by an mass of ecto-plasmic fudge if you've be devoured by it already."
"He could have left a note," Tucker suggested.
"Shut up you two," Danny said, trying not to laugh.
Jack Fenton decided that leaving a note for his wife explaining his untimely demise would be a poor idea, as it was likely the ecto-plasmic fudge would have already made short work of him before he could write the first line.
"So much for your brilliant idea Tuck," Sam laughed.
The conclusion was quickly drawn that the ecto-plasmic fudge could not be allowed to devour the dashing Jack Fenton, so he ran to the freezer for some ice.
"I told you the opposite of fudge was lemonade," Tucker snickered. "Lemonade with ice."
"Maybe he was going to ask the fudge if it was thirsty." Sam suggested. Danny groaned and looked at the ceiling.
Jack quickly poured several trays of ice on the offending creature. Causing the fudge to set and harden. Soon the ecto-fudge was rendered defensless due to cooling off.
"Oh man," Tucker groaned. "And I was actually thinking this story was kind of good there for a moment."
"You should have known better," Danny laughed.
"Hope springs eternal," Sam added.
Jack discovered that perhaps making ecto-fudge was not a good idea, so thereafter he only used authentic velveeta cheese in his fudge.
"That does not sound appetizing," Sam said with a sick look on her face.
"It's kinda good," Danny told her and smiled at the skeptical look on her face.
The three friends watched as Jack Fenton turned and set a large plate of fudge before them. "And here it is," Jack said. "The infamous ecto-fudge. Do you want some?"
"Uh! No thanks Dad!" Danny said quickly.
"Yeah," Tucker agreed. "I'm trying to cut back."
"My mother says I'm not allowed to eat things that glow," Sam answered.
"Too bad," Jack said as he picked up a piece of fudge. Then growled as he threw a piece of the candy at Danny. The three friends jumped up and ran out of the kitchen as fast as possible. Jack laughed to himself as he sat down and began to eat.
"Jack Fenton!" Maddie said as she walked into the kitchen. "You're going to spoil your supper with all that fudge, besides, I thought I told you I'd made that for Danny and his friends."
Jack smiled to himself as he chewed a piece of creamy, delicious, perfectly normal fudge. "I offered it to them," he told his wife. "But they didn't want any. Really. You can ask." Maddie walked from the kitchen shaking her head.
Jack laughed as he shoved some of the fudge into his pockets. "You are a brilliant man, Jack Fenton. Completely brilliant."
I have decided that I hate everything I've ever written. I still feel like writing though. This idea came to me earlier today and I decided I would run with it. Tell me what you think. Want the other eight stories?