When all is said and done

and I'm looking back upon the race I've run

and when my heart gives in

I know you will be beside me, precious friend

it's just the same from the beginning to the end

when all is said and done

He gets her back, but it's not in the way he expected. He can finally have her, can finally acknowledge how much he has loved her, because she's dead and it's all over.

He can't feel Dee standing next to him, or see the tears on his father's face as he kneels beside her. All he can feel is her lips on his that one, desperate time so many months ago; all he can see is the last smile she had given to him, before she introduced Sam Anders and walked out of his life for what he thought was forever.

He hadn't understood what forever really was, but now he does, and he doesn't think he'll ever be able to take a deep breath again.

and if I lose my way

and I wander down this open road for days

and if the sun should fall

and the dancing we once did becomes a crawl

let the memories move like shadows on the wall

if I lose my way

He breaks his grasp from Dee's with a brutal yank, and follows his father into the raptor, because he thinks he has to see with his own eyes to truly believe.

When he does see, he wishes he had thought differently. It nearly kills him to stand over her motionless body at the back of the raptor, and for an instant he wishes Tigh would have left her on the planet so he could have been spared this paralyzing grief.

He searches her pale, still face for some sign of the life that once existed there, for a sign of the woman who had lived inside his skin with him all these years. The tears come when he lets himself understand that she isn't here anymore, not in this moment, in this body, in this life. She's really gone.

Everything is said and done, whether he wants it to be or not, and the irony of the situation threatens to bring him to his knees. Once again, she is with Zak, with Anders . . . but not with him.

and when I'm coming home

and I walk across the bridge of death alone

I will fix my eyes

on the one who is waiting at the other side

my old friend, with countless others there beside

when I'm coming home

when I'm coming home

when I'm coming home

He has never been a religious man, never believed like she did, but as he kneels on the hard floor of the raptor beside his father and smooths the collar of her coat, the hair from her face, he prays that his life won't be very long, and that when he dies – when he really dies and he doesn't come back – that she will be there. It's the only hope he has left.

If he can't be with her in life, he'll cling to the belief that maybe he can be with her in death.If the others are there, he'll even be willing to share.