Summary: AU. Mac and Madison weren't switched at birth and life as a 09er is about to take on a whole new meaning.

Disclaimer: I do not own Veronica Mars. The title comes from an AFI song that I also don't own, and if you sue me I will be forced to eat you. That will be unpleasant for all parties involved, so let's just not go there.

A/N: I completely put all blame for this plot bunny on Hider. She got it into my head weeks ago and I sort of experimented with it since then, but then tonight I finally sat down and started writing it. Reviews are like acid: drop one and have fun.


She was ready to strangle him. Her laptop sat completely unprotected and oblivious to his flailing limbs and her eyes narrowed a little more with every inch that he gained on the coffee table. His brother continued to try and stop the wrestling match they had gotten themselves into and she watched warily from the doorway.

"Damnit, Dick!" They crashed into the table and she clenched her fists when the laptop went crashing to the floor.

He was going to die. Soon.

Cassidy shoved at his brother one more time before standing up and straightening out his clothes, noticing her pissed off expression. His eyes widened a little and he looked around, spotting her laptop lying open on the floor.

"I am so sorry," he said quickly, rushing to pick up the computer and push the coffee table back into place as he set the laptop down on it.

Mac took a deep breath and smiled at the youngest Casablancas. "It's fine, Cassidy, don't worry about it." He nodded a little and sat on the couch as her gaze turned to Dick.

She raised an impatient eyebrow and Dick stopped laughing, sitting up quickly.

"I'm sorry."

"Do you even know what you're apologizing for?"

Dick looked at his brother for the answer to her question and Cassidy rolled his eyes, picking up the abandoned game controller that was lying at his feet. Dick glared and looked back at his girlfriend.

"No," he admitted. "But whatever I did, I'm sorry."

Mac sighed heavily and pointed at her laptop, which Cassidy had placed gently on the coffee table just a moment ago. Dick furrowed his brow in confusion.

"What? Nothing happened to it, I don't know why you're getting all pissy."

"Of course you don't," she rolled her eyes.

"Come on, Mac, it's not like your mom wouldn't just buy you a new one if your precious baby broke."

"That is beside the point," she said quietly, irritated, as she walked across the living room to grab her stuff. "You could be a little more considerate, Dick."

"I thought your parents were out of town," he said in confusion. She nodded as she stuck her laptop in her bag, turning to look at him as she stood up.

"They are."

"Then where the hell are you going?"

Cassidy quietly set the controller down and told Mac he'd see her later before leaving the room. He wasn't going to stick around to watch another fight between her and his idiot brother. He'd seen enough in the past six months that they'd been dating.

"I think I'll call Veronica, maybe catch a movie," she shrugged and started heading for the front door. Dick gaped at her before scrambling off the floor to follow after her.

"Are we still going to Shelley's party tomorrow?"

He leaned against the door and she crossed her arms in front of her chest impatiently.

"Sure. Can you move?"

Dick pushed himself off the door and settled his hands on her shoulders. "Hey," he said seriously, ducking down a little to look her in the eye. "I thought you were staying here this weekend."

Mac stared at him incredulously and shook her head, moving out of his grasp as she gripped the doorknob.

"The sweet act doesn't work on me, Dick; you should know that by now."

She walked out of the house and toward the light green beetle she'd gotten for her birthday. Dick stood on the porch and blinked at the scene unfolding before him.

"We were gonna kick Beaver out and have the house to ourselves, remember?"

She grinned and turned to face him once her door was open.

"Well now you can spend the weekend bonding with your little brother," she said cheerfully. "I think he's feeling a little neglected," she winked and ducked into the car, tossing her bag into the passenger seat. Dick set his jaw and she smiled at him as she backed out of the driveway, giving him a little wave as she turned her stereo up.


"Mars Investigations."

"Hey, Veronica, it's Mac."

Veronica smiled and leaned back in her chair. "Hey, Mac. Dick getting on your nerves?"

"You have no idea," Mac rolled her eyes and opened the front door, greeting her little sister as it closed behind her and she headed upstairs. Veronica chuckled.

"I told you not to date a caveman."

"And I ignored you, my fault, I know," Mac grinned as she sat down on the edge of her bed. "What are you doing after work?"

"Logan and I were going to catch a movie. You're free to join us if you need a break from Dick," Veronica offered. The door to the office opened a second later and she smiled at Logan while she listened to Mac complain about Dick's lack of respect for her stuff. "You expect Dick to treat your stuff nicely? He doesn't even treat his own stuff nicely. His iPod snapped in half last week because he stepped on it at the beach."

Mac snickered, "Oh, but he has three more to replace that one so it's not that big of a deal."

Veronica rolled her eyes. "I think someone should take away all of his money. Just leave him in a cave somewhere and see how long he lasts without a maid."

"We'd be planning the funeral within an hour," Mac said wryly. Veronica laughed.

"All the more reason to do it," she said wistfully.

"Hey, that is still my boyfriend you're talking about."

Veronica smiled as Logan sat down across the desk from her and propped his feet up on the surface of it. "And as much as I adore you, I still think you're an idiot for dating him."

"Thanks," Mac laughed and flopped back on her mattress. "Are you sure I can come with you guys tonight? I don't want to intrude on your date."

"No, it's cool. I think Logan was going to invite Cassidy anyway," she looked to her boyfriend to confirm her response and he nodded.

"Okay. Time?"

"Meet us at the theater around seven, we'll figure out what we're seeing when we get there."

"Sounds good. See you then."

"Bye Mac," Veronica smiled and hung up the phone, turning her attention to Logan. "Dick's living up to his namesake again."

Logan grinned and put his feet down. "Mac having problems?"

"Always," Veronica agreed as she stood and walked around the desk, leaning down to greet him properly. "Hi," she whispered, smiling. He kissed her quickly and tugged on her hand to pull her into his lap.

"Hi," he grinned and kissed her again, securing his arms around her waist. She raised an eyebrow.

"My father is in the next room."

"I thought your dad liked me," he frowned.

"He does. That doesn't mean he wants you touching me in any way, shape, or form," she grinned and pressed a kiss to the corner of his mouth before standing up. "So it's you, me, Mac, and Cassidy for the movies tonight."

"What's Dick gonna do all alone on a Saturday?"

Veronica paused to consider the question, turning to look at him. "Dance around naked to the Spice Girls?"

Logan groaned and covered his face with his hands. "Thanks for the visual, Mars."

She grinned, "Any time, Echolls."


Cassidy grabbed his cell phone off his dresser and shoved it hastily in his back pocket, the keys to his car hanging absently from his other hand. He checked his reflection once more to make sure his hair wasn't doing anything too weird and left his bedroom a moment later.

Dick didn't look up from the video game he was playing but called out to his brother as he walked past his bedroom door. Cassidy silently groaned and turned around, pausing in the doorway of Dick's room.

"What, Dick? I'm late."

"Late for what? Finally manage to get a girl, Beave?" Dick grinned and paused his latest round of Grand Theft Auto, leaning back against the pillows that were spread out on his floor.

"I'm going to the movies with Logan and Veronica. Can I help you with something or are you just being annoying?"

Dick's smile faded and he stared at his brother blankly. "What did you say?"

Cassidy's eyes widened and he hastily stuttered out a "Nothing!" before turning and practically running to his car. Dick was a few feet behind him, shouting at him as he climbed into his car and backed out of the driveway.

He let out a breath when he was on the road and shook his head, turning on the radio as he drove. He was so not in the mood to get the crap beat out of him today.