We're back! Ish.

Disclaimer: Eng. (n.) a person who disclaims. Fr. (v.) to disclaim.

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Part XXIII

From: prettyinpink(at)dechagny. net;
To: castncrew(at)operapopulaire. com; bigbrotha(at)dechagny. net
Subject: RE: New Opera, Patron, and a Cool Quiz

Hello, good friends!

Now, I know I'm a wee-tle late with this, but better Nate than le… late than never, right?

Basic Info:

Name? Raoul de Chagny the Fair
Age? young and beautiful, of course
Eye color? pretty-boy blue
Hair color? a dazzling gold… but the important thing about my hair is its body and shine… Why doesn't this quiz have a question about hair style? A tragic oversight!
Height? 6-feet-plus of foppy-muscle

Faves:

Country? Paris, duh, it's only the fashion capital of the world
Food? exotic delicacies that enhance the skin
Movie? Cinderella. That Prince Charming sure is a pretty guy (he's my idol)
Drink? exotic fruit juices that enhance the skin
Animal? I'm really not a fan. Such coarse hair!
Color? Pink… but lavender isn't so bad

Are you:

Nice? -flashes 1000-watt smile- look at my pearly-whites!
Sarcastic? naw! -flashes even brighter smile-
Funny? people point and laugh when they see me, is that a good thing?

Finally:

Do you remember your dreams? Yes, I had one last night… Christine was there, and so was… Erik? I dunno, but whoever it was didn't have a shirt on…
Do you believe in soulmates? Oh, my sweet Eri – Christine!
Do you believe in love at first sight? Umm… nope, no love yet. But I'm sure attracted to Er – Christine
What was your favorite childhood toy? My dollhouse! It had hardwood floors! And this really pretty pink sofa…
Thoughts on life? Peace, man. I'm totally a flower child…
Who do you want to be stuck on an island with? E – dammit! Christine.
What did you do before Opera? I'd rather not share; it wasn't too legal.

Best,
Raoul

"I feel pretty, oh so pretty!"

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From: welovepublicity(at)operapopulaire. com
To: castncrew(at)operapopulaire. com; prettyinpink(at)dechagny. net; bigbrotha(at)dechagny. net
Subject: New Opera!
Attachment: ScamPlan3217803. doc

Hello all!

Your lovely, awesome, spectacularly clever managers have come up with a spiffily new idea to make more money… er, that is, to entertain the audience. We shall make a new opera out of our situation! So the plot is:

There's a young, orphaned ballet dancer named Kristin who works (surprise surprise!) at an opera house much like our own. But actually, she's a really good singer, and there's an unseen "spectre" who lurks under the opera house teaching her to sing; oh yes, his name is Enrique. Now, Enrique's secretly (yea right…) in love with Kristin, who's sort-of-not-really in love with her childhood friend, Roland, who's definitely in love with her almost as much as himself. Almost.

Kristin has a best friend named Marge. She's really just a plot device so Kristin doesn't get too emo and kill herself before the whole drama with Enrique. Roland, see, has an older brother named Phil, who's having this v. illicit affair with Serena, the lead ballerina.

By the way, they just release this movie that basically has the same plotline as us, but they're getting flamed for not staying true to the Leroux plot. That's why we're going to be all-Leroux! But we do know one good thing, since the movie didn't stress the actual plot very much, we're not going to either. Instead, we're going to focus on the sexual innuendos and stuff that the movie had; it's sure to draw crowds!

For the rest of the plot, please see attachment.

We now need to cast everyone into their parts. Messieurs Comte et Vicomte, we are currently short of staff, so we're going to have to ask you to take part in the acting as well. :-)

Cast:

Enrique – the Spectre of the Opera
Kristin – the young ballerina-soprano hybrid
Roland – the childhood friend-lover guy

Marge – Kristin's confidante
Serena – the "loose woman"
Phil – the, for lack of a better term, "loose man"

Mme. Giry – the box-keeper, not a ballet mistress
Karly – the Prima Donna
Bingo – Karly's lover

Note: Nadir is omitted because he's unimportant; the movie cut him and Leroux didn't even mention his name.

This is an open casting call. Please e-mail us if you have a role that you prefer, but we shall make the final judgments.

Your ever-ingenious managers,
Andre-n-Firmin

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From: prettypirouettes(at)operapopulaire. com
To: castncrew(at)operapopulaire. com; prettyinpink(at)dechagny. net; bigbrotha(at)dechagny. net
Subject: RE: RE: New Opera, Patron, and a Cool Quiz

Now, why do people sign their e-mails "best"?1

I mean, "best" – what? Best regards, best wishes, best of luck, best of show, best shot, best bib and tucker?…. what?

Non-best,
Sorelli

PS. Sorry, just PMS-y
PPS. better Nate than lever? Care to explain?

"Coupé, coupé, jeté, jeté, assemble!"

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From: bigbrotha(at)dechagny. net
To: castncrew(at)operapopulaire. com; prettyinpink(at)dechagny. net
Subject: RE: RE: RE: New Opera, Patron, and a Cool Quiz

Hey guys,

I agree with Sori, mostly because she can make things difficult for me quite easily, but nevertheless, I agree with her.

Personally, I sign my e-mails with a nice...

Yours faithfully,
Philippe de Chagny

PS. Sori, you reeaally don't want to hear a better Nate than lever story. I've heard it… a lot of times, unfortunately. Raoul, fool me once shame on you. Fool me seventeen times, still shame on you! If you do it again, I'm going to tell everyone about how you were Juliet for the school play!

"Everyone loves a well-educated man!"

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From: frozenexpression(at)operapopulaire. com
To: castncrew(at)operapopulaire. com; prettyinpink(at)dechagny. net; bigbrotha(at)dechagny. net
Subject: RE: RE: RE: RE: New Opera, Patron, and a Cool Quiz

Hi all,

Umm, first off, Sori, I was just doing some research for health class, and it turns out mood swings and all that opera don't exist. And, can you believe sugar highs are fable too?1 I know, utterly shocking, but woo, now I have my project idea for Psychology class!

I think, with my tutor's permission, of course, that "yours faithfully" is a bit old-school. I'm a supporter of the more colloquial e-mail-enders.

Toodles!
- Chrissie

"…angel of music…"

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From: undergroundlunatic(at)operapopulaire. com
To: castncrew(at)operapopulaire. com; prettyinpink(at)dechagny. net; bigbrotha(at)dechagny. net
Subject: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: New Opera, Patron, and a Cool Quiz

Fools,

I know for certain that I have the most correct, proper, concise, elegant, and overall sublime letter closing of them all.

Yours,
O.G.

See? Nice and simple. Brevity is… wit.

"The Phantom of the Opera is there… inside your mind!"

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From: blondeballetrat(at)operapopulaire. com
To: castncrew(at)operapopulaire. com; prettyinpink(at)dechagny. net; bigbrotha(at)dechagny. net
Subject: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: New Opera, Patron, and a Cool Quiz

Eww, Erik. You make it sound like we are all having wicked love affairs with each other or something. "Yours" indeed…

Platonically,
Meg

PS. Not that I'd mind an affair… just not with a mildly sunburned guy, no offense.

PPS. Hey Chrissie! I can be totally philosophical, watch this: If power corrupts, and knowledge is power, then you should really stop with the whole taking college classes thing.

"Cute and blonde since 1854!"

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From: frozenexpression(at)operapopulaire. com
To: blondeballetrat (at)operapopulaire. com
Subject: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: New Opera, Patron, and a Cool Quiz

Between you and me, whoa, that's deep. O.o

Totally psyched about Psych,
Chrissie

"…angel of music…"

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From: welovepublicity(at)operapopulaire. com
To: castncrew(at)operapopulaire. com; prettyinpink(at)dechagny. net; bigbrotha(at)dechagny. net
Subject: FW: New Opera!

Okay, since no one bothered to reply to our casting call, we're just going to assign roles. And to explain some… controversial castings, we've added some justifications.

Enrique – la Carlotta; she's got the looks for it! Plus, awesomely scratchy voice; Italian accent might even be mistaken for a sexy Scottish brogue.
Kristin – Meg; she's got the right hair color.
Roland – Erik; we know, he's got that sad excuse for a deformity, but it's practically nonexistent and easily covered by foundation, so, no worries! Anyhow, Erik's young and hot, obviously love-interest material.

Marge – la Sorelli; she can actually dance.
Serena – Mme Giry; see below
Phil – Nadir; isn't it cute?

Mme. Giry – Raoul; he's got the perfect hair length for a woman! Well, that came out wrong…
Karly – Christine; certainly shrill enough.
Bingo – Philippe; same level of singing ability.

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Authors' Notes: Unfortunately, Elizabeth was off cavorting in England for the last two weeks, so this chapter was written by Eloise. Although the authors' note is being written by Elizabeth. Anyway, I just thought you should know that the bits about "sexy Scottish brogues" are entirely Eloise's twisted brain. Apparently, they are her weakness.

Eloise's Note: so not true about the Scottish brogue! Elizabeth's just a pathological liar. She can't help it. Ignore her. Really.

Next chapter will be the new opera!