Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha or any of the characters thereof.

A/N: This is the revised version of 'My Humps'.

Warning: Adult themes, language and lemons.

'..' thoughts

"…" spoken words


Chapter 1: High School Sux

The luminescent moon peaked beyond two crests of cloudy tufts in the midst of the pitch dark sky, like a pale ghostly figure suspended amidst a shadowy sea of black. Silvery threads of moonbeams reach out to the world below, piercing through the murky sky and illuminating the world below with wisps of platinum streams.

A lone figure stood in front of a series of rectangular buildings. Icy wind blew across the silent concrete landscape. The figure sneezed softly shifting the heavy woolen scarf higher. Again the wintry breeze howled eerily in the freezing night, making the person shiver and slouch slightly inside the form fitting blazer the figure wore.

In the light of the pale moon a curvy shadow lay imprinted on the cold concrete footpath distinguishing the figure as female.

A soft muttered curse broke through the icy winds as another blast of cold air whiplash across the already shaking form. With teeth chattering, a pair of almond shaped eyes surveyed the white washed building that stood imposingly before her.

'I can't believe it's been five years.' Thought Kagome as her blue gray eyes scanned the hulking structure. 'Dare I say I almost feel a sense of nostalgia?' She mused in dark sarcasm, as her eyes once again swept across the familiar building.

Echoes of her miserable teenage years drifted past. She had fit the category of 'freakishly ugly' in her younger years, dubbed officially as an outcast, a social reject if you will.. Or as the clique in her high school had put it frankly in years past, extraterrestrial ugly.

To them, she was an unbelievable composition of features that never failed to repulse the opposite sex and mobilized those of her own gender to mock her openly in malicious amusement.

"E.T." She mumbled with a rueful smile, that was what they christened her as. Her real name was never mentioned, never used, no she was known not as Kagome, but E.T., some kamis' sadistic idea of a joke. Aesthetically challenged was a mild way of putting it. She was always made to feel like she was a grotesque mutant, concocted in a science lab petrie dish.

Kagome laughed bitterly. She was a joke, at least to most of her peers anyway. Those were the years she had wanted to erase from her life. Well perhaps not all of it. By some bizarre twist of karma, she was not left alone during the last three years of high school.

Unbelievable as it sounds, she did make a couple of loyal friends who made her tortured existence then a bit tolerable. She cherished them whole heartedly. They were the balm that soothed her emotional wounds. Bolting her eyes shut, she permitted their smiling faces to grace her mind, her plump cherry lips dredging up at the corners to form a smile.

'Sango, with her high pony tail and tomboyish ways. Ayame with her fire red hair and quick temper and Miroku with his err..' the figure of Miroku with his face being slapped solidly in the cheek surface in her mind. A girlish giggle burst out of her cherub lips as shook her head at the faint memory.

''Then there were the Taisho brothers..' A sigh escapes her lips. Inuyasha had been her closest friend, although she felt and suspected that he harbored feelings that ran far more deeply than a mere friend should.

'But then again the jerk ran off with my cousin and supposed friend Kikyo. Man my high-school life really sucked. He was dense, pushy and loud. But then again, that was what I loved about idiot.'

In truth, Inuyasha was brash and unbelievably rude to everyone else but he also had moments when his tough exterior would crumble and his gentleness and thoughtful nature appeared. Kagome felt her heart swell up in happiness with the knowledge that she had always been present during those times when he showed his emotional vulnerability.

'Finally, there was Sesshoumaru. How could one describe him... cold bastard? All sovereign jackass? Ugh! Even all the derogatory words in the dictionary elude any descriptions that would suit the self conceited dog.' Kagome sighed mentally. A prick in her heart made her jump a fraction. 'Dammit, he chewed up my heart, spat it out, dragged it through the dirt and buried it in his backyard!' she fumed. 'Well bad karma to him! I hope it bites him back hard in the ass!'

He had been her first and long lasting crush. She remembered that night on her sixteenth birthday, Inuyasha had gotten permission from his parents to throw a surprise party for her in their house.

She was wearing a ruby red dress, hired by Inuyasha (of course the dumb idiot had to rent a shockingly red dress, kami knows why he couldn't have just asked Sango or Ayame about her favorite color instead of opting for his much favored shade of red).

While that was bad enough, in his haste to throw her an unforgettable party, Inuyasha had also mistakenly hired an ill fitting dress that had puffy sleeves and stiff frills on the layered skirt. What the idiot was thinking at that particular time was open to speculation but she didn't have the heart to hurt the hanyou by refusing to wear the horrible monstrosity of a dress after all the trouble the baka had gone through, so she wore it the whole night.

The only one wish she had that night was one dance with Sesshoumaru.

Kagome closed her eyes placing herself back at that time. She remembers it vividly.

She had smoothed out her frilly dress as she swallowed the gum she was chewing (before it got stuck to her brace) and gathered up the courage to ask the stoic youkai for the last dance. It was her birthday after all.

The air was heavy and tense that night. She was so nervous her one inch-thick glasses started to fog up and cause her eyes to appear more magnified than it already was. Walking slowly she recalls tilting her head sideways so that the lights won't reflect back through the lenses making her eyes give an impression of a semi-trailer's freakish headlights. Her palms were sweating profusely and her throat was drying out. When she did reach him she ended up asking him in a squeaky, shaking voice.

Kagome winced, recalling the way he looked at her in apparent disdain with those condescending amber eyes as though she was some detestable diseased individual polluting the very air he was breathing.

Unconsciously, her small hands fisted at her side. Furrowing her brow she called to mind the way in which her heartbeat hitched up a notch or two pounding heavily in her chest. Then he spoke the words that jarred her soul and forever burned holes in her mind and heart crushing any dreams of a fairytale ending.

"This Sesshoumaru does not involve his person with those beneath him. It is an affront to be accompanied, let alone be seen with an undesirable ningen wench as your self."

'What was the word? OWWW! And that's with capital letters. His most exalted Excellency the Grand Duke of all Dickheads, literally pulled out my heart through my nose.' thought Kagome squaring her petite shoulders in anger.

"This Kagome will not forget such affront so easily." She mocked, mimicking his cold and superior tone as best she could.


Kagome whips around abruptly as she was startled out of her derision of Sesshoumaru by the familiar husky voice.


A lone woman walked at a brisk pace along the path towards Kagome. The crisp clicking of her high hilled shoes tapped the ground noisily with each step. The other woman stopped directly in front of Kagome, silently assessing her under chestnut brown eyes. Kagome herself paused as she considered the other woman.

Both figures stood an arms span apart, pinning the other with an intense glare of scrutiny. Kagome sneezed twice unexpectedly breaking the stand off and instigating a furious bout of hugging and laughing.

"You haven't changed a bit Sango!" chirped Kagome.

"Ne... The guys better watch out for you! Look at you, you look great! Wait til the hanyou gets an eyeball of you!" squealed Sango excitedly extending one hand to the other woman.

"Come on, we'll talk more once we're inside." Sango beamed.

The two girls entered the building with linked hands, smiling warmly as they walked and talked about the past.

Sango led Kagome through winding corridors onto the gym hall were the high school reunion was being held. Their conversation stilled as an elderly teacher barred their path.

"Miss Kaede." Greeted Sango warmly.

The old woman's gnarled hands shifted the thick spectacles that bridged across her nose. Craning her head upward she peered through the half moon lenses. "Sango." She acknowledged with a curt nod.

Kaede's eyes shifted across to the other woman who stood beside Sango. Her thin lips pursed in quiet contemplation even as her smoky black eyes, so dimmed with age fasten intensely to the young woman beside her previous pupil. The elderly teacher's obvious curiosity flitted across her wrinkled features.

"Sango, who is your friend? I thought you said that you've finally convinced Kagome to come to this year's reunion?"

"Miss Kaede, it's me, I haven't changed all that much have I?" responded Kagome softly.

The old teacher leaned forward, her eyes suddenly widening in recognition. "Kagome Higurashi!" She gasped hoarsely.

"Don't have a heart-attack Miss Kaede you'll start a commotion. This is Kagome's first time to be back here and I want everything to be perfect! Oh geez, the reunion's just about to start. Haul ass Kagome we've still got to look for our seats."

The two bid their farewells to their past high-school teacher after exchanging contact numbers and promising to keep in touch before rushing to the gym hall. Panting heavily they walked up to large desk containing an untidy stack of paper and rows upon rows of name tags placed concisely in alphabetical order.

There they were greeted by a pony tailed red head filing her nails. Kagome smirked. The red head youkai asked their names in a coarse raspy tone without so much as a look in their direction, opting instead to continue admiring her manicured claws.

"What are your names?"

"Ayame, we don't need a freakin name tag, everyone in that freakin hall knows everyone else." grumbled Sango irritably, thumping one fisted hand loudly on the wooden desk.

Ayame squealed in surprise dropping the metal file with a soft clink on the vinyl floors. Narrowing her eyes she pinned Sango with a glare as she adjusted the crumpled skirt she wore.

"It wasn't my idea. Hell I couldn't careless! But Kik's and I got told by cyclone Kagura and her little band of harpies that we had to. Man how I wish I can shove those damn pom poms of theirs up their.. hey, hey!" She laughed nervously finally noticing another figure lurking behind Sango. "You bought a friend.. how nice."

"Idiot! This is Kagome." Cried Sango in an exasperated tone.

"No sh't? It is!" Ayame jumped from behind the desk and hugged Kagome tightly in a flash. "My chibi Kagome is all grown up and so beautiful, ... OMFG! You grew boobs!" She screamed pointing at Kagome's chest. "And they're freakin bigger than mine! How many gallons of milk did you drink? You're not lactating by any chance are you?"

Kagome's face flushed a furious scarlet. She cast her eyes down fidgeting the front latch of her shoulder bag.

"Shut up fur brain!" yelled Sango pushing Kagome behind her. "Kami! You'd think it was the first time you've ever come across boobs!"

Ayame rolled her eyes. Placing her hands on her waist, she tilted her hips to the side. "I'm just excited, you oaf! I haven't seen Kagome in ages and she has changed … a lot!"

Sango clicked her tongue as she folded her arms across her chest. Sure she noticed how Kagome had changed, who wouldn't? But Ayame didn't have to point out the obvious, and it's apparent that Kagome was still sensitive about her appearance even after all these years.

Ayame was so dense at times, it drove her insane. Sure she was good friends with Ayame but there were moments she feels the urge to throttle the over dramatic ookami. And this particular time was a definitely one of those choice moments.

"Ah, yea, thank kami I grew out of the awkward pubescent stage." Remarked Kagome casually.

Ayame beamed a smile before striding slowly across the other edge of the desk where she took out her hot pink mobile phone in one dainty hand. The stiff crepe fabric of her knee length skirt swished audibly with each movement she made.

"We've gotto to call Kiks!"

"Ayame no!" blurted a horrified Kagome. "Please.. I , um... not yet." She pleaded.

Sango stepped next to her placing a reassuring hand on her shoulders. Kagome smiled slightly at the simple gesture Sango made, sensing her friend's sympathy reaching out to her.

Ayame smiled half heartedly remembering the breech in the cousins' friendship. She sighed heavily through tense lips. "Still not over the Inuyasha issue huh?"

Kagome's head snapped up. Inclining her head to the Ookami she took a step forward and embraced the abashed looking youkai.

"Actually I have, but I'd rather just sit at the corner of the hall and not bother anyone.. I only came here because I promised Sango I would." She replied in a shy even tone.

Ayame hugged her back. "I'm glad to see you again anywayz." She stated, ruffling the shorter woman's bangs in a fond manner.

"Ayame give Sesshoumaru-dono his name tag!" screeched Kagura, pushing past Kagome and Sango.

Kagome hissed softly. She could feel all the blood rush to her head. 'Sesshoumaru! He was here? Now?' Her slim form trembled a fraction. Again she felt her throat going dry as the heavy pounding of her heart once again thundered unmercilessly in her constricted chest. Slowly she peered through her bangs observing Inu lord's lithe form and graceful strides that had enamored her all those years ago.

Sesshoumaru's impeccable form appeared along side the irritated Kagura. He stood there silently, the aloof, cold resolve of indifference etched on his face. He wore a dark gray Armani suit and matching slacks. The well tailored garment complementing the aristocratic elegance and charming allure that the young lord exuded.

Sesshoumaru's silver tresses were pulled stylishly on a low ponytail, his handsome face framed sophisticatedly by his layered bangs, with the cobalt blue crescent moon, opaquely visible through the silver water fall. He looked dangerously beautiful.

Kagome stood gaping at him in bewilderment. Only Sesshoumaru was capable of invoking such a stupefied expression of wonder on her face. Yes, she admitted even long ago she could never hide her admiration for the stoic lord in all her high school years, but that was then and this was now, she's a grown, independent, sassy young lady. Surely she's developed some Sesshoumaru immunity along those years of maturity right?


Kagome gulped, all her chaotic thoughts ceasing in that instant.

Oh kami, he was looking at her again with those round pools of liquid-gold eyes. A pressure built up in her chest, she found all the air knocked out of her lungs. She felt unable to breathe in his presence. The electrifying raw attraction she felt towards him re-awakened with just one glance.

'Dammit! So much for Anti-Sesshoumaru defenses.' She groaned inwardly. Clearing her throat, she acknowledged his query by a polite and courteous bow.

"Uh, yes it's me." Kagome answered in a steady, even tone . 'Sh't Kagome, he only mentioned your name and you're already blabbering like a freakin 16year old idiot!'

"You have … matured."

'You have matured? That was it? Does this male dislike conversation that much? Or am I just a lowly vermin that he couldn't be bothered to have a chat with? Five years of carrying the abject humiliation he inflicted on me and 'you have matured' is all he could say? …Yarrghhh..'

"E.T.? It is you!" gasped Kagura her right eye twitching violently. "I always thought you'd be first to remodel your face. So tell me which plastic surgeon should I congratulate on a job well done for your new face?"

Kagome eyes narrowed, her steel blue orbs flashing angrily at the obvious insult thrown at her. Thinking quickly she recovered her composure and straightened her back, glancing at the kaze youkai in a remote, uninterested gaze.

"Actually Kagura, my face is my own. But by the looks of you though, you should take your own advice and remodel your butt ugly face. You've piled on so much make-up I'm surprised you could even talk." retorted Kagome coolly reveling in the way the female youkai's face darkened and scrunched up in indignation.

"Why you..! Sesshou? Where are you going? Sesshou?"

"It is degrading to be involved in petty female squabbles." He replied apathetically walking away.

The words thundered in Kagome's mind, a resurgence of anger, humiliation and hurt covering her lovely face. From within her something snapped.

"Petty female squabbles? I'll show you petty female squabbles! Ya damned puffy Labrador!" High in adrenalin and with temper soaring to new heights, the petite young woman quickly untied one of her high heeled shoes and without any second thought, threw it towards the Inu lord's head.

Sango, Ayame and Kagura watched wide eyed and slack jawed as Sesshoumaru evades the shoe in a blink of an eye, catching the dainty foot ware between two elegant claws.

"Cinderella losses her shoe before the stroke of midnight... How tragic." He remarks dryly, his visage an impassive mask.

"Hey! Give me back my shoe you dumb ass!"

"Why should this Sesshoumaru return your shoe when it was you who threw this lethal projectile at my person. Surely you do not expect me to return such deadly armament back to you."

"It's my shoe! What the hell am I supposed to do all night? …. Limp?"

"Hn. This Sesshoumaru is not amused by your wild antics wench. Do as you wish, this lethal projectile however will not be requited back to you."

"Wild antics my ningen ass give me back my shoe or I'll ... I'll."

"You'll what?" asked the Inu Lord appearing suddenly in front of her in a split second. Sesshoumaru's hot breath fanned her skin sensually. "Shall I expect some retribution? Ought this Sesshoumaru quiver in trepidation before you?" He asked in a low, mocking tone.

Kagome stilled, completely aware of how her body was slowly becoming intoxicated by the mere closeness of the Taiyoukai. She moistened her lips, reigning in the frantic, fluttering of her heart to normalcy.

She sucked in a sharp breath, shrugging back her shoulders and gritting her teeth together as she angled her whole body so as to face him. Gathering her courage Kagome met his eyes, unafraid and unintimidated by his imposing form.

"I'll attach my filthy-ningen self to your high and mighty youkai person all evening." She smirked in smug resolution tipping up her nose at him.

The Inu lord barred his fangs, growling low in his throat. His eyes narrowing into feral slits.

"You wouldn't dare." snarled Sesshoumaru, shock materializing momentarily behind the amber depths.

Kagome grins mischievously. "Try me." She challenged, her eyes glinting hard.


Ookami: wolf

Inu: dog

Hanyou: half ningen half youkai

Ningen: human

Chibi: 'little' (fond term for children)