How to Learn to Shred


Do you think I own this? Do you think I do? Well let me tell you something! I don't, okay? Are you happy now? You just made me feel more inferior! Ooh, that was my vocabulary word...

A/N - I hope you enjoy reading this... The idea of this story came from my wonderful beta (most of the time) jakuzabi!

..:Chapter 1 - The Skateboard:..

"Hmm... What's this?" Lee pondered to himself, taking an unidentified object from the garbage dumpster. He wasn't actually looking in the dumpster, just strolling by and something caught his eye. (a/n-riiiiight)

The taijutsu master picked up the oval-shaped object and marveled at its beauty. The object was rough, like sand paper, on one side, while on the other, were a lot of brandname stickers and a few pictures. Two...things...were attached to each end, with two wheels attached to each thing.

He spun the wheels and his heart did a leap for joy when they spun perfectly. He placed it on the dirt path, wheels down, and stood on top of the foreign object. He thought he knew what it was. Really cool guys used them to travel, and to "shred".

They were called "skateboards" and only people cool enough, and "hot" enough by girls' standards, could ride them. He stood proudly on the skateboard and pushed away from his current location with a foot. He felt as though he was soaring.

Alas, the feeling was short lived.

The wheels crashed into a bump, sending Lee tumbling headlong into a bush and covering him in twigs and leaves. He sighed to himself and rose from his position. Dusting himself off quickly, Lee ran over to the skateboard.

"If I want to ride you, I need to be cool. So, I need lessons from someone cool," Lee thought aloud. First person to jump to mind was Neji. "Nope, not Neji, he's probably not hot enough," Lee said, nodding his head in agreement to himself.

"That's it! Gaara's perfect!" he stated like a scientist finally finding the cure to the common cold, which was Lee's second most important goal.

So, skateboard in hand and idea in mind, Lee set out for the Kazekage's home. He was sure Gaara was cool enough and hot enough, but what if Gaara refused to teach him? What would he do then? He had to learn to skateboard.

While his thoughts meandered, the shinobi walked blindly to Gaara's house, having been there so many times it was in his muscles' memory. Soon he came to the gates of Sunagakure and cluched proudly onto the skateboard.

Lee continued walking through the deserted paths and strolled up to a large manor. He looked down at the skateboard, as if checking if it was still there, then knocked on the door. A grumpy redhead answered the door, glaring at the leaf-nin.

"What do you want, Lee?" he asked, pondering on whether or not he should shut the door in Lee's face.

"I need you to teach me how to 'shred'!" he exclaimed.

"How to what?"

"To 'shred'." he repeated, holding out his skateboard for Gaara to see.

"What's that?" the redhead asked, voice laced with confusion.

"Y-Y-Y-You d-d-d-don't know wh-wh-wh-what it is?" the leaf-nin stuttered with wide eyes and a dropping jaw.

"Should I?"

"You're supposed to be cool enough and hot enough!" Lee stated, making Gaara blush at the thought of him being hot.

Before the conversation could unravel anymore, a blonde came walking through the room. She noticed the two boys and walked over to the pair. She saw the skateboard and grinned at it.

"Lee! You know how to skateboard?" she asked increduously.

"No, I was asking Gaara to teach me," Lee said. Temari slapped a hand to her forehead, shook her head and sighed. She then took the object from Lee's hands and walked out into the open clearing, placing one foot on the skateboard.

Temari pushed her way off the spot and steered through the road without any difficulties. Lee marveled at the techniques while Gaara...looked like... Gaara?

She did a few ollies, some manuels and one or two kick-flips. She then stopped abruptly, jumped off the skateboard, and walked over to the other two.

"So, Lee, you wanted to learn how to skateboard?" Temari asked, handing the skateboard over to the leaf-nin.

"Yes! Will you teach me, Temari?" he pleaded, curving out his lower lip.

"Sorry," she began apologetically, "I'm not really the teacher-type."

"Then how did you learn to 'shred' like that?" he asked, emphasizing the word "shred".

"I have a teacher, simply put. I see her during nighttime. You're welcome to come along," she offered, smiling at the boy.

"Ooh, I can? Who is she?" Lee asked with enthusiasim.

"Gaara's girlfriend," she joked. Lee looked at her wide-eyed as his lip quivered and his eyes began to water. "Jeez, I was only kidding," the blonde added. " Why'd you have to get so worked up about it?"

The taijutsu master coughed nervously. "No reason... Anyway, what time should I be here?" he questioned, shifting from toes to heels.

"Just stay here, you wouldn't know where to go--"

"Yes, I would!"

"Temari, he's been here too long," Gaara interrupted, looking to his sister. She looked back at him with a confused look.

Before any more words were exchanged, Gaara shut the door in the leaj-nin's face. He gave a small sigh, then returned to the window sill where he sat, tense. The blonde walked to her brother with an apalled look on her face.

"How could you do that? He can't just roam around Sunagakure. He doesn't know where to go!"

"This is his sixth time being here this week," the redhead reasoned. "He knows the village well enough."

"Gaara, that's not nice. You don't just slam doors in people's faces!" she explained before reopening the door to reveal no energetic Lee on the doormat. She stormed back to her sibling and glared.

"Now look what you've done! He already left!" Temari yelled at the Kazekage.

He turned his head to glare mercilessly at the blonde. "Leave me alone," he growled, venom dripping from each syllable. He watched as she took a frightened step back. She glared one last time at him and ran out the door, grabbing her coat on the way, and yelling out the visitor's name.

"Lee! Lee!" she shouted, but had no luck in finding the energetic shinobi. She stopped and sighed in defeat, taking a seat on the nearest bench. Her eyes darted around, still searching for the leaf-citizen, when they stopped on a familiar face. She smiled to herself, before hiding behind a nearby tree.

Temari watched the person search, then walk to the tree adjacent to the one she was in. She then saw as the other found the exact person she was searching for. She was glad to see the leaf-nin smiling and not looking depressed or angry.

"Lee," the sand shinobi said, standing by the boy, arms crossed.

"Gaara? What are you doing out here?" he asked, surprised.

"Temari said I made you run away. So I had to search," he answered in a bored tone.

"No, you didn't. I just had to do something. I spotted these trees and I thought I could relax for a while."

"Lee, why do you want to...'shred'?"

"'Cause then I'll be cool and 'hot' and all the girls will like me. And that'll mean Sakura-san will like me too!" he said with joy. "And then maybe...someone else will like me too," he continued in a quieter tone. Temari listened intently and tried to scoot closer to the boys.

"Someone else?"

"Yeah, someone else I really like..."

"Lee, you normally just ask the girl to be your girlfriend," Gaara stated.

"No, I don't!" Lee argued.

"That's how you were with every other girl you liked."

"Yeah, well, this person is different!"

"Whatever, let's go back," the redhead said, holding out a hand for the taijutsu master. Lee took it willingly and the Kazekage helped him stand up. The two walked back to Gaara's home in complete silence, although the silence wasn't uncomfortable.

Temari walked behind them, a good length away. Soon they made it into the house and shut the door. Once she got to the entrance, she stood there deciding what to do. After a good five minutes elapsed, she opened the door with a look of feign worry.

"I couldn't fi--Oh.. Lee. There you are!" Temari said, acting shocked. "When did you come back?"

"Gaara found me!"

"Oh, well... It's about-" she looked toward the clock, "-8 o'clock, she should be here anytime now."

"Who is she exactly?" Lee repeated, turning to Gaara. "Do you know her, Gaara?"

"No, he doesn't. He never stays up long enough. He goes to sleep too early," the blonde teased, earning a glare.

"Wait, 'goes to sleep'? Does that mean Shukaku isn't in Gaara anymore? That's wonderful! Now you can sleep! But if you can sleep, then why do you stil have those giant bags?"

"They're permanent," Temari giggled, earning another scowl from the redhead.

"No, Lee, Shukaku is not gone," Gaara said truthfully. "I just leave before the girl ever comes."

"Oh, fine, Gaara, spoil my fun. Well, now that you know the true story... Anyway, she is a very cute girl. Kankurou thinks she's hot and wants to date her, but that's beside the point.." Temari rambled on.

Suddenly, a knock sounded through the rooms and Lee grinned even wider. The female walked to the door and prepared to open it. She threw open the door for everyone to see. There standing before the threshold was...


Dun, dun, dun... Ooh, this is gonna be fun. Basically I just don't know who it's gonna be so everyone else's have to wait! Bwa ha ha! ...Anywho... Tell me what you thought and if another chapter would be nice...

Also, if you could give me some ideas on who it could be. I'm flat out on that part, so suggestions would be great:))

Okay now, thanks for reading, hope to hear your compliments and complaints... Buh-bai ---Dana-chan...