Disclaimer: Don't own TT, and the ingenious title was inspired by Oasis -I love you guys!-
Author's Note: Set after Spellbound. Pairings are Raven and Robin. I'm going to continue. Maybe...But uh, I don't think It'll be very long. So treasure the few chapters I'll be posting up...with a review?
Raven tossed on her bed. She knew she was not going to get any sleep with a haunted book in her room. But trying to was worth a shot. Scrunching up in the purple sheets restlessly, Raven bit her lip, holding her breath. She was afraid, if she let go - she would start crying, and that she would never stop.
Calming herself down she fought back her tears, not wanting of any explosions late at night in her room to disturb the peace. Though it was nothing near peaceful in her room.
Bad memories rewound and played in her head.
Dragons, a seemingly gallant and charming book, a white knight that she never really met and an awful feeling for being used.
Right then, she would do anything for the floor to reach and swallow her up. Devouring slowly or just a flash of unexistence was fine with her. She wanted to melt away for being so foolish and childish. She would do anything to end her existence in the world.
'Raven, you aren't beautiful or dark. You're creepy. Your worthless and what's more. You're stupid. Stupid enough to believe the dragon and its flattery. Foolish enough to think you could receive such compliments.'
'If it makes you feel any better Raven. It's not coming back.'
Knowledge always made her feel better.
Or what you could call better.
She rolled over, but never stopped. Instead she rolled off the satin purple sheets and landing on the floor painfully. "Ow." She groaned tiredly. A mistake, Raven thought. She should never have lifted her teeth off her lips. A single tear and a moan slipped out.
Quickly brushing the tear drop away she sauntered lazily over to the case which she had locked the book in. Deciding it would be best if she converted these tears into an uncaring cold feeling, she kicked the box tiredly. "Aren't you going to say anything you blasted book?" She asked in a dead; grudging voice.
"Guess not." She answered quietly.
This petty rage she had taken up on the innocent box was interrupted by a soft knock on her door. Thrice, softly but in succession.
Who is it?" She called out softly.
Thinking she would not be heard and when the person received no reply would walk away mind his or her own business. But what surprised her was the reply. A soft but overwhelmed with concerned voice answered: "It's me, can I come in?"
'The usual cockiness in his voice seemed to have vanished. How charming...'
Raven mused to herself. But in any case, she trotted over slowly and pulled the door open, all the way. It was a first. But it wasn't a very pleasant one. A rush of freezing cold air hurled into the room.
"Yes Robin?" She asked in a somewhat mocking tone.
His hand was anchored at the back of his neck rubbing it awkwardly. "It's cold out here." He said lamely; taking sudden interest in his shoes.
"You could go to your room." Raven answered.
'Great, she's being difficult again...'
Looking up at her, Robin laughed a bit, rather pathetically. "It's cold there too." Raven stared at the flushed Boy Wonder without flinching one bit. Give her a bit of credit for that.
"You could go to Cyborg's and Starfire's room."
At least she's being reasonable...Beast Boy's room stinks.'
That was it, Robin was getting impatient with her, "If I wanted to I would be there by now." He said irritably. Raven matched the annoyed look on the Boy Wonder's face with ease. "Well sorry for asking. It would seem suspicious for you to 'hang out' with me." Raven snapped back, dramatically placing air quotes in between her sentence.
"I choose to do the 'hanging out' with you." Robin said impersonating Starfire's out of place voice for the enunciation of that word. Raven cocked her head to one side and crossed her arms, clearly irritated.
"Should I be honored?" Raven asked. Then seeing the sad look on the Boy Wonder's face it was clear to her what he was feeling and thinking. 'Oh great! They think I've gone soft...Me, happy? Ha! Just because they saw me go happy for a while and weepy for the next has nothing to do with me getting soft.'
Noting that Robin chose not to say anything but instead, his gaze staring intensely on her, she decided to let her guard down. Feeling through her empathy, they boy's feelings, were true, genuine. He wanted to help.
'But would you let him?'
Narrowing her eyes on the Boy Wonder, she couldn't help but to give in. Her strained with annoyance face softened into her true feelings, a combination of sad, angry and guilt." The happy Raven died today." She said plainly. A lot of emotion was channeled into those five words. Tears puddled in her eyes.
The words stuck Robin fiercely though Robin couldn't find a reason why it affected him so much. 'You're her leader, of course you care.' His mind assured him.
But, why are you so sad, If your just her leader?' His subconscious complained.
'Damn you forsaken betrayer of my mind!'
Robin seeing Raven this sad broke his heart. He was afraid if Raven was to let the tears pour down her face, he would end up crying for her as well as much as he didn't want to let Raven see. The link they had between them was causing great pain to him, he was struggling to remind himself that all this pain he was feeling was Raven's, not his.
"A-an-..."Robin waited for Raven to stir up the effort to say what she wanted to say patiently." And," She spoke firmly. "She's not coming back." Just then a sparkling drop of what looked like a tear fell off her cheek.
"At least let me help her."Robin said, his voice nearly cracked. Even tougher was that it still didn't seem to belong to him. 'Dang that feels weird'
Raven's jaw nearly dropped. If it had been anyone else who heard her words would send her for therapy or make a lame excuse to get away because it was uncomfortable to see an ice queen tearing.
"You cant." Raven said after a moment of hesitation.
Robin's voice shook, and it was not the only thing that shook. He felt his body shiver and his teeth chatter as well. It actually was the cold's fault since he- being outside. Robin wasn't totally lying. "Why not?" He asked shakily.
But it that wasn't the only thing that was causing him to shake.
"She's gone, Robin." Raven spoke, "And you can't help someone who is not there." She finished sadly.
"I don't think she's gone." Robin answered, regaining his calm composure. "Can I come in and find her?" Staring intensely into her eyes was one of the worst ideas Robin ever had. It was a pool of anger, worry, sadness, depression, confusion, frustration and everything that you wouldn't want to feel in human nature was overwhelming.
Raven finally broke down, stepping aside letting the Boy Wonder come in, "You can try, but you won't have any luck." Still not entirely moved by him.
He walked in and Raven closed the door behind him. Comfortable warmth sunk in.
He nodded and looked at the entire room for the first time. It was surprisingly not as dark as Beast Boy, Cyborg or Starfire said it to be. All the lights in the room -though not many- were switched on and the inviting bed sheets were somewhat neat.
Robin tried to stay and look calm in front of Raven. Though it was difficult not to sweat while his stomach did somersaults and his heart lunged into his throat. It was the first time he had seen her whole room; statues of stone were placed here and there.
He walked over to her bed and set down. It was a lot softer than his and very comfortable. He then turned over to the dark goddess and saw her standing motionless in front of the closed door.
'She's being difficult again...' His head sung.
He patted the bed beside him, motioning her to sit.
Obeying like a trained dog she sauntered over and plopped down onto the purple sheets.
"Raven, why are you sad?" He managed to ask without choking. His concern for the girl threw the uncomfortable feeling aside. Raven's eyes went big. It was the last thing she thought the clumsy with words Boy Wonder would say. She was expecting maybe a lame start like: How's life? Or...So...what's up?
She looked away. Trying to work her monotone and her usual poker face but nothing seemed to be working then. "I'm not sad" She answered plainly. Robin frowned. He knew, it was hard not to with the bond they had, even without it, it was blatantly obvious.
He could have yelled to her that she was lying and she was being difficult or he could talk to her...
"Raven," He called out peering down, lowering his head to see the look on the girl's face. "Raven, look at me." He said firmly. She hesitated shooting a glance at the boy wonder. But before she could make up her mind, a strong gloved hand lifted her face up gently.
"Raven, are you sad?" Robin asked again. This time softer. Emotions whirred around for the two titans. Raven smiled reassuringly, "I'm fine Richard. Now go get some rest." She spoke crawling near her pillow leaning against the back of her bed.
But Robin was not one who would give up easily. He did the same. "I know you're sad." He stated drawing the bed sheets over their laps. Raven quirked an eyebrow up tiredly. "How would you be so sure?"
Robin opened his mouth to speak but closed it. He felt like he had just swallowed a barb wire.
'Say something you fool! The bond! It's the bond!'
"Last week." He said, pausing.
Raven still had that uninterested look Wonder she creased her eyebrows irritably and said: "What about last week?" She asked looking blankly at Robin.
After a few seconds, Robin mustered enough strength to answer her. "When Robin went crazy." After saying that he felt like slapping himself and rewinding time. He seriously regretted saying that.
Oh great, refer yourself in a third person! That'll turn her on...'
Raven froze. After that incident, no one spoke of it again. It was an unspoken agreement. Neither made the deal and neither closed it, but the deal was there and it had just been broken.
When he was sleeping, Raven could hear him screaming in his sleep. She hadn't really had a good night of sleep then.
Raven bolted upright after someone screamed in her mind. "What?" She closed her eyes for a while and concentrated on the sound in her mind. A flash of something like a traffic light pounded into her mind." Robin!" She cried.
She dashed into his room. After opening the door; she saw him sleeping. But that wasn't all what he was doing. Kicking and screaming; Robin was having nightmares.
Running over she pressed her palm against his forehead, "Sleep well Robin." She whispered. Her hands were glowing a soft blue when that happened. Removing her palm from his forehead, he immediately calmed down and fell into peaceful deep sleep.
Before closing his door, Raven checked on Robin for the second time and left.
Leaving Robin wander off into his dreams.
"You came to check on me." He spoke.
"What? How do you?" Raven asked now panicking more than ever.
"The bond Raven..."Robin said trailing off."Thanks...I owe you."
"But how would you know? You know...about the bond?"
Robin let out a small chuckle and slid under the blankets, resting his head on his hands. "When something is there Rae, you sort of know its there..."Robin said bashfully.
Raven didn't say anything she just sat there and nodded dumbly.
"After that night, I had the best sleep I ever had for the next few days until..."Robin was interrupted by a soft and gentle tone," Today."
Robin grinned a bit, "Exactly."
There was an uncomfortable silence between the two friends.
"Why am I here Raven?" Robin asked, breaking the silence.
"Huh?" She asked blankly.
"Your a smart girl Raven, why am I here?" He asked again.
"Because you owe me...?" Raven deadpanned almost immediately.
No...Not really actually...I didn't mean to say that...'
Robin was silenced by those four words. 'You know be better than that!'
His broken heart lurched to the bottom sinking pathetically down into his feet, It was rather uncomfortable, he tried not to squirm as his organs started re-organizing itself.
Sensing the uncomfortable ness in the silence, Raven decided to get over it already, for she thought she knew where the conversation was going... South.
She let out a weak and almost sad laugh. "I should've known anyway...that, Malchoir...was fooling me...Not one person will ever love me, I'm no where near beautiful. And I'm not dark, I'm creepy." She tossed over on the bed with her back facing Robin.
Robin was enraged by what she said. He was so angry that she could think so lowly of herself. No words could describe how compassionate he was towards the girl. A pang, no..A bolt of passionate anger, sadness, empathy and sympathy for the girl shot up his chess.
"Look at me! "He got up and raised his voice. Raven stopped dead, she had never heard or seen the boy wonder this angry in her life. Not even to Starfire when he was haunted...
She hesitated on turning around, afraid of what he'll look like or do to her. But slowly and reluctantly she did.
Robin was looking down on her with creased mask of anger and his face strained with disgust." Your right! Not one person will ever love you! You're not beautiful!"
Gasping, Raven was shocked, she really thought Robin cared enough to come into her room to make sure she was alright, not to shower her with reassurance and blow it up in her face.
Raven felt a gold ball wedge down her throat, choking her slowly. Breathing quickly, she felt tears well up her eyes. "N-no...stop." She choked out. "I can't believe you."
Robin, finally done with feigning anger; he softened his face with amusement and a smirk. She was really angry now. "What's so funny? "She demanded. Tendrils were threatening to rip him apart or blow him apart. Robin laughed, "You believe in yourself don't you?" He asked in his usual cocky voice.
'Now this is the Robin I know.'
Raven just realized what he was doing... But she didn't speak or move a muscle, but while she sat there seemingly thoughtless and motionless, she was laughing in her mind. And what's more, Robin knew about that pure innocent laughter.
He smiled genuinely, "But you are right..." But before she could speak, the spiky hair adolescent beat her to it. Reaching and taking both other hands - raising it to chest level; he said: "You're not beautiful, you extremely beautiful. Your not dark or creepy, you are who you are, not one person will ever love you, but the people you love will love you
back, not ever...But forever." He said compassionately.
The girl blushed a deep shade of wine but quickly calmed her buzzing emotions. "Flattery will get you no where Grayson." She spat bitterly, pulling her hand away and turning away from him. But a small part of her, shit, who am I kidding? A big part of her wanted to believe what he said and the other really tiny part was reluctantly in denial.
Robin laughed even more. Putting a hand on her shoulder he said: "You know my past, present and a bit of what I want to be in the future, we have a bond Raven. You know everything about me. And personally, you're perhaps the only person who I would want to know about this, you know everything. So...can't you tell I'm sincere?"
Raven pondered for a moment and in a wave of realization she looked up to him with a blush and a smile. Then Robin spoke again. "And if you ever need to be loved, call on me, all the time...Promise?" Robin asked.
He felt like he sounded just like a five year old, asking his little girlfriend to miss him when they parted for a month of school holidays. He could imagine himself saying, 'don't forget me come tomorrow.'
But never the less Raven replied with a small entertained smile:" Promise."
Their hearts fluttered aimlessly around, feeling much better they filled themselves under the covers, and even without confirmation of whether Robin could crash at Raven's place to sleep, they both had an unspoken agreement. Not caring who the first to ask was.
I would like to thank Oasis, not that they've done anything directly to help me but-it'll be cool if they did, their song champagne supernova rocks! I got some inspiration from there.