So, there used to be a chapter to a new arc here, but then I changed my mind.

We're going straight into Akatsuki encounter rehash. (Which I'm in process of writing, but it's not top priority.)



Omake! 1: Welcome back, Kakashi-sensei!

'Well, I guess there's no helping it,' Kakashi thought to himself when his team met for the first time after the invasion. 'I did promise Obito and Sensei that I would try to make nice with them…'

"Yo," he said a little more carefully than usual.

The kids looked at him dully. "You're only ten minutes late," Kiba pointed out in surprise. Kakashi sweatdropped. Truthfully, he hadn't been able to stand the memorial stone's accusing and pointed silence. 'I know, I know,' he thought to the dead people. 'I'll do it.'

"Right," he said, running a hand through his hair nervously. "Well, I just wanted to apologize to you two for, uh, leaving right after the preliminary round…"

"Hmph!" Kiba sulked, crossing his arms and turning away. "I didn't need you anyway! And it's not like you helped Uchiha much," he added pointedly. Sasuke growled angrily and clenched his fists.

The two were ready to fight when suddenly, a choked gasp stopped them in their tracks. Kakashi panicked. 'Oh, no, she can't be that upset!' he thought frantically. 'It's Kizuna! She doesn't cry like a little girl! Wait, she is a little girl. And I just left her unconscious in a hospital with a broken arm… But she lost! She didn't need training like Sasuke did! …And she probably thought I left because she lost…'

Feeling increasingly pathetic, Kakashi raised his hands in a placating manner. "Now, now, Kizuna, we'll get in lots of special training from now, so we can…"

"Special training?" Kizuna said quietly, cutting him off. "Like Jiraiya-sama's special research?" Looking up at him, she brought her arms in close and seemed to curl up in the same way her very shy friend often did. "You're… really that kind of pervert, aren't you?!"

"Eh?" Kakashi wondered.

"You're a total pervert just like that Ero-sennin!" she declared, shuddering. "Iya da!" ("No~!" //// *heart*)

Kiba roared in fury. "You pedo bastard!" Claws extending dangerously, he leaped at the jounin. Even Sasuke edged away from their teacher.

"Do you spy on us in the hotspring too, sensei?" Kizuna egged him on shamelessly. "After we get all sweaty and flushed from our workout? How about you show us your special moves? Won't you teach us how to penetrate with our weapons? You've got great stamina, right?"

Kiba was determined to carve out a pound of flesh for every suggestive comment she made, but Sasuke quickly caught on. The look he gave her was rather disparaging. Later, he would think that maybe he should have just gone along…

"Laying it on a bit thick, aren't you?" he said dryly. "Maybe all of that would be a bit more believable if you actually had something to interest a pervert…"

'…but you're as flat as a board,' went unsaid, but it was strongly implied.

"Oh, I guess you're right," Kizuna said with cloying sweetness. A bitter, sharp undertone made Sasuke wish he'd kept his mouth shut. "As far as perverts go, you're the real target? With that pretty face and nice ass, well, there's only one thing that makes you less girl that me… So how about I fix that?"

It took a moment to get past "pretty face" (indignation) and "nice ass" (stupefaction), to work out what she was getting at. Sasuke paled.

Kizuna smirked viciously, pulling out a kunai. "I'll cut it off!" she hissed, her eyes glinting with the thirst for vengeance.

(Note: Iya is a super girly way of protesting something. Well, not necessarily, but it can be super suggestive, especially the way Kizuna is doing it. It's what blushing school girls in ero (hentai, perverted) anime would say when accosted by the big, bad perverts.)

(And, yes, Kizuna is just screwing with everyone. Nothing actually happened…)



Omake! 2: She's really a girl

"It's not my fault there's nothing feminine about her," Sasuke hissed, nursing his aching wounds. "Outside of a hot spring, a pervert wouldn't even notice she's a girl!"

Getting neither an agreement nor a vicious defense from Kiba, Sasuke glanced at him with mild irritation. Inuzuka was wearing the oddest expression as he turned to Sasuke. "I dunno… Kizuna's definitely a girl," he said slowly. "… I mean… at the funeral…" he mumbled.

Sasuke lifted an eyebrow. "What, her hanging all over Haruno? That depends on whether you count Haruno as a real male. His hair is pink."

Shaking himself out of his thoughts, Kiba snorted. "More telling would be that he's stalking you," he pointed out. "No, I mean… Kizuna, in that black dress… she looked kinda… pretty."

Sasuke had to think back carefully to even vaguely recall what Kizuna had been wearing, but then it came to him – a simple but elegant black dress with a very flattering mini-skirt. "She's got nice legs," Kiba murmured in a kind of stupor.

Well, yes, she does, Sasuke found himself mentally agreeing.

Freezing suddenly, the two boys exchanged horrified looks. "So wrong!" they moaned in tandem.