Amazing, isn't it? I actually started a chapter without it taking six months! Lmao. So, my spring break still managed to stink, but at least I came out of it with a pretty bomb-sauce new breaks CD. BUT ANYWAYS.
So…I guess this chapter was kind-of inspired by "Beautiful Love", or the 8th & Ocean song, which I have a new love for-but really, this whole story comes from weirdo love songs like that.
…And Green Day, 'cause they're grand, as always. I love awkward-y love songs. xD
I hate…that I like crappy shows on MTV like 8th & Ocean and Wild Out! Chh, Nick Cannon is my gangsta-love!
Heh, anyways, enjoy the chapter. Hopefully by next chapter some HARDCORE Ryou/Bakura stuff will be going on or at least a kiss. XD Either way. And thanks again, everyone, for all the good reviews. I hate that you have to reply to them all individually now and can't do it in the actual chapter. Pff, dumb-sauce.
Warning: Nope, I don't own Yuugiou and watch out for the gayness, if you're weird and don't like that kinda stuff.
Is it weird…
That I've never been on a date before?
I sigh, limb falling off the sofa, dragging my fingers across the plush emerald carpeting. Am I even the kind of person who can go on a date? After all, I mean, not that I'm trying to sound like I hate myself or anything but-…
My gaze drifts upwards to the rather bland snow-hued ceiling. Do I even have anything to offer someone like Bakura? And if I do, why has it taken me 17 years just to find one person who was interested?
…Okay, so that's kind-of a lie. There has been a few people interested in me before, but with each one of them, it never worked out. We never clicked and not for a lack of not wanting to but because…
I didn't really try. That must sound so stupid, right? I mean-I did try but…I don't know. There was always something I should've said that I didn't or something I should've done but I didn't know how to go about it. Every almost relationship I've ever been in, well, they've all ended up the same. We never kiss, though we like each other, we never actually make it to that date.
I didn't ask any of the people out, I didn't try to push myself hard enough. I was shy, hell, I'm still shy when it comes to that! I haven't gotten any better, not at all. I mean…by now, most people have at least been with one or two people. Malik's had at least six boyfriends. Ryuuzaki? Honda? Yuugi? As far as I know, they've all at least been with one person, hell, Yuugi recently got into his first relationship.
The first day Yuugi met Atemu is the last day we ever saw Yuugi alone. The two are always together! They're holding hands, they're sharing kisses, they're always in each other's arms and never apart. It's so weird to me, because…as a teenage boy, isn't that what you're supposed to be fighting against; being stuck to one person? As a guy, aren't you supposed to never want to be held down, aren't you supposed to splay the field or whatever you want to call it?
…They're so in love, it's almost sickening. I mean, not that I don't like them because they are some of my good friends but…ugh. I just don't know. If I could trade places with Yuugi and be in someone's arms, doing what he's doing…
It makes me feel kind-of sick to my stomach. I don't know, I guess…I just don't think anyone could ever fall in such a love with me or that I could ever be in love like that with anyone else; not really, anyways. And even if…I was in love, would it really make anything better? If Bakura and I actually got past our first date, would I even be able to succeed this time? Could I keep him interested long enough to even have my first real kiss?
Do I even want it from him, or any kind of kiss in general?
I'm not sure…
I'm not sure I'm ready for love, not in any way or form . Besides, for the last four years of my life, I've lived by my lonesome for the most part. My dad only comes home maybe 1 month out of the year to see me. I guess…I've kind-of proved I really don't need anyone else. My friends keep me happy, I keep myself happy. I'm so good at just being me right now, getting through my life like I do…
I've seen what relationships do. Am I really ready to give into the problems having a boyfriend creates? If…I have a boyfriend, I'll never have time for my friends. I mean…none of them ever do. Not really. Sure, they tell themselves that they won't let having someone special get in the way of their friendships, but the longer they're together, the longer you don't see them. Malik's one of the only people I know, who when in a relationship, still manages to hang out with me majority of the time. He tells me he's just a genius when it comes to his time management and that there's no reason he needs to be attached to anyone's arm for more than a few hours a week.
But…what I think? I don't think, even after so many relationships, Malik's ever been in real love with any of them. Including Katsuya. Sure, Malik likes him a lot and he's stayed with him the longest out of any boyfriend, but…
Comparing him to how Yuugi is with Atemu, it's nothing alike. Malik and Katsuya have even been together longer, but you never actually hear them tell each other "I love you". I don't know, maybe that's just how it works with them…
Or maybe Malik's just doing what I think he's doing. The second Ryuuji told Malik he was falling in love with him was the day before Malik broke up with him; Valon, too. I don't really think it's any sort of coincidence. Maybe…deep down, even know Malik likes to be with people, he's like me, and he's still secretly afraid of actually being in love. Malik's so quick to get away from anything to serious…
Still, I think…deep down, I'm a bit jealous. I can say all these things and estimate what I'd be like in a relationship, but I can't actually give anyone a straight answer because…
I've never been with anyone to have anything to tell about.
Bakura…will you be different? Will I finally see what love is like?
At the sound of the front door opening, I jump. Malik must have finally made it. All well, I guess I should just stop thinking about it for now. What happens between Bakura and I happens, and I guess it doesn't take a genius to figure out I'm going to screw it up.
"Ahn. Ryouuuuu." A choked whine made it's way out of Malik as he sat there, curled up upon the recliner, hair still disheveled from waking up, mouth twisted sourly as his tongue stroked upon the roof of his mouth, the taste of morning still clear, still having not made it to the bathroom to brush his teeth. It wasn't that he hadn't wanted to get up, but…11 am!
…They didn't even have to leave until noon, so why on earth was he shaken awake at 10:55, Ryou already beginning to rush to get ready? They had plenty of time! Why did they need to be up so long before they needed to leave? All Ryou and he had to do was get dressed and how long did that really take them-oh, and Ryou needed a shower, which would last, oh, 15 minutes at the most…
NOT A WHOLE DAMNED HOUR.
Sulking, Malik muttered into the recliner cushion. He was still so tired from last night. Sure, Katsuya, with much nagging, had let him go back to Ryou's around 11 pm but…
Then he had made Ryou cook him food and had forced Ryou to play video games for another two hours, though the boy was already exhausted, before they finally made it to bed around 2 am. But with only nine hours of sleep, how was Malik supposed to survive today!
"Oh, shut up Malik! You slept longer than you even needed to! You'll be fine! Hurry and get clothes on now! You know Katsuya, Yuugi, and Hiroto are about to be here in 20 minutes, lazy! You have seriously been sitting there, wallowing in your stench for at least 15 minutes! Go get dressed before, as usual, we're all stuck waiting for you!" Ryou yelled back irritably from the bathroom where the boy was currently washing his face. Sighing, he glanced into the mirror, shaking his head. And Malik wondered why he was forced to be awake an hour before they had to leave. Sure, the boy only took maybe 10 minutes to get ready but he also took another 20 MINUTES just to sit there and actually get his unmotivated ass out of bed!
Pouting, Malik glared towards the hallway which lead to the bathroom where his currently, jerk of a friend was located. How dare Ryou curse at him already! He didn't even need to be yelled at like that yet, he hadn't done anything wrong besides be -forced- to get up when he didn't need to be awake! Muttering incoherently, the boy stood from the chair, fixing his only item of clothing, a simple pair of long jersey shorts which had somehow turned to the side, making them slightly uncomfortable to wear. He really hated wearing clothes to bed, in all honestly. Hell, if he was still alone, he probably would have been naked, but no, because Ryou had to be such a sissy about dumb crap like that, Malik was forced to wear clothes to sleep. It was like a punishment, really! It's not like he wanted to show off his body to his friend or secretly seduce the other or anything like that! Hell, he had even offered to keep a blanket wrapped around himself the whole time but all that ever happened was that Ryou's cheeks would tinge pink and the boy would give him a haughty glare, wordlessly describing how uncomfortable that would make Ryou feel. Frankly, Malik wondered what the boy was going to do when it came time to sleep with someone. That was going to be a sight to see because Ryou didn't even like to be more than shirtless in front of other people! What was he going to do when someone actually wanted to ravish that shapely little body of his? Just glare? Snorting as Malik began his trek to Ryou's bedroom, he gave the boy a glance before heading into said room, opposite of the bathroom. Nah, Ryou'd probably just blush and do exactly what he had done when Katsuya's sister had mentioned he had a cute smile; Change the subject completely and pretend like he hadn't heard because acknowledging it would be much too embarrassing and life-threatening, to actually RECEIVE a complement and smile and say "thank you!" would be all too much for Ryou.
Sometimes, it really killed Malik just how much Ryou played the innocent card and pretended to not notice when people hit on him. Couldn't Ryou just admit to himself, for once, that he was very attractive and a cool person and deserved the attention?
…Oh no, because that would be doing something bold and Ryou might die if he had to set foot in an uncomfortable zone for even a second. Grinning, Malik's hand wrapped around the bronze knob of Ryou's closet door, opening it with ease. Now…what to wear to the show…
Hell, like he really even cared what he wore. As long as it was something black and not one of those preppy striped-polo-things Ryou was so accustomed to, he was in the clear.
Hands fumbling through the neatly hung shirts, Malik shrugged and grabbed the first black one he found. "Good enough," he mumbled, eyes closing as he dragged the shirt up over his head, sliding it on with ease. Mildly, he wondered what was even on the shirt. Gazing down warily, the word 'Vans' raced in front of his eyes. A band tee-shirt of some sort would've been better but…he didn't really care, so this one worked. Yawning, he shut the closet door, making his way to Ryou's dresser to borrow some jeans and socks. Malik frowned at the thought of the latter. He really hated those too, but Ryou would kill him if he even tried to wear his shoes again with no socks because, well, as they had discovered a couple of years back, Malik's feet tended to absolutely reek after concerts…or just after anything for that matter. As a joke, Ryou had even bought the blonde Athlete's foot cream one year, thinking maybe that would cure the stench a little, but nope!
…It also could've been because Malik wasn't consistent with the spray and he was supposed to change socks two times a day. Did he though? Hell no, because that was inconvenient and Malik was all for the opposite. "You know Ryou, I wonder what everyone would do if they saw how much of an ass you are when noone else is looking!" He retorted back in response to Ryou's earlier command, snickering as he tugged on a pair of dark blue jeans. Ryou of course, only rolled his eyes now as he brushed through his long, cotton-y locks.
"I'm not being an 'ass'. I'm being punctual, a skill I really think you were born without, or maybe you just lost it when your sister dropped you on the head as a baby." Smiling, Ryou peered to his reflection in a satisfied manner. Making fun of Malik and vice-versa was always one of his favorite past times. Like most friends, they each had too much fun taking low blows at each other for even the dumbest of things. And as for waking Malik up, well, Ryou knew Malik knew it was really what had to be done.
"At least, unlike you, I wasn't born with an aging disorder!" An aging disorder? Ryou glared into the mirror suddenly, pointedly at his snowy locks. It was something Malik never could leave alone, just how shockingly white his hair was because he knew how badly it got to Ryou, who, every time, if made fun of it for long enough, would always begin to worry if he really did look like an old man. Malik always had to explain he was kidding and that Ryou and his milky strands were drop dead sexy, which Ryou blushed at, like everything else that was pointed toward his obvious attractiveness.
Turning his head and pivoting backward, Ryou peered into the doorway of his bedroom to scope out his friend, who he expected and was, sitting on the bed, slipping on a pair of mismatched socks. "You know, you should be careful to what you say to supposed 'asses' like myself or this brush I have here might just collide with that big head of yours!" Ryou countered back, swaying the brush within his digits. Malik only laughed, eyes peering up to the other from the neatly made bed he sat upon.
"You do that and I might just have to take my socks off later and make your shoes smell like straight-up garbage." Ryou's eyes widened and he sat the brush down, stalking into the bedroom. No way was he about to let Malik wear his shoes with no socks, not even for a minute! That was just gross!
"You do that and I won't even need that brush to smack you upside the head! I'll just do it myself!" Ryou cried, standing in the doorway of his room, looking scarily serious about that though really, it was just talk. Like Ryou would ever hit anyone! Sure, they had play fights but even at Ryou's 'manliest' hour, he was sure to lose. Ryou took what he didn't have in strength in wisdom-Malik, well, he was kind-of the opposite, which is why the two needed each other so badly or so Malik thought. When Ryou got into fights like the two times he had, fully by accident, Malik was right there to punch the lights outo f the jerks who even dared to hit Ryou. And school…well, no matter if it was History, Science, Literature, or anything else Malik was bad at (Which at times, felt like everything), Ryou was right there to help, even if it meant sending text messages with test answers over their cell phones, which Ryou disapproved of heavily. Ryou, being the nice guy he was though, just wanted to help his friend in any way possible because he knew Malik would do the same for him.
"No you won't or I'll make you even later! Maybe even past 7 o' clock." Snerking, Malik remembered just one more thing he could poke fun at Ryou about.
…Or, his semi-date, at least, with that Bakura-dude. The first date, sadly, Ryou had ever been on. It was just…every one he knew, even guys who weren't really on the curvy side, would at least say Ryou was a good-looking male. How was it that Bakura had been the first to notice this?
Actually, no, it wasn't like that. Even he knew people before had liked Ryou but Ryou being Ryou, had pushed them away whether he meant to or not. But Bakura…well, Ryou was just lucky he was forward with what he wanted or that date probably never would've came because Ryou sure-as-hell wouldn't have initiated it. Still…if this night worked out with Bakura, Malik wondered if he could somehow help Ryou keep it going because Ryou in a relationship with no help was a disaster. Malik understood; Ryou just didn't know how to handle himself in those kinds of situations, which is where he and his dating expertise came in to help! And…he would, because it was by far, time for Ryou to have that first kiss he knew the boy wanted. And Bakura…well.
Ryou had been shyly fawning over him for two straight months now. Even know Ryou didn't mention him often, Malik knew. Best friends always know, just not quite as good as Moms…
But Ryou had no Mother, and neither did he, so they both just had to try and make do with what they had, and that was each other. And Bakura, well…Malik was a little bit protective and afraid over the idea, only because he didn't want Ryou to get hurt, and Ryou was the type to get hurt easily. Ryou wore his heart on his sleeve, in a sense, not that he really cried every single time something went wrong but…
Malik and anyone who knew Ryou that well could tell that he wanted to. Just as sensitive as Ryou was though, he was also tough mentally. Probably stronger than himself.
Ryou's eyes turned to slits and he stomped over to Malik and lightly kicked his friend in the leg. "Oh no you won't! I'd leave you behind if you even tried!"
"See, ow!" Malik pouted, toeing at the other as well. "You are too a jerk. What is Bakura going to say when he finds out you aren't the sweet boy he masturbates to?" Grinning sheepishly eyeing Ryou's reaction, he knew he had finally gotten to the boy. His cheeks? Well, they were the hue of double-stemmed cherries and his eyes were now as wide as a baseball. Knowing it was only a moment until he got his ass beat in, Malik cackled and dashed away from Ryou who screamed and attempted to latch onto his shirt collar.
"I'M GOING TO EFFING RIP MY SHIRT OFF OF YOU AND KILL YOU FOR THAT!" Ryou started up after Malik hurriedly, feet pounding against the apartment floor trying to hard to catch up to his best friend, the one who was about to die within a few seconds! For the love of God, would there ever be a day when someone could like a person innocently without anything perverted being implied!
…Not with Malik around, at least. As Malik stopped for a breath behind the wooden coffee table still laughing, Ryou eyes hacked at him like a dead man walking. That had never, ever needed to be said! Dammit, now he was going to picture Bakura d-do….doing that and it only made his flushed color intensify! He hadn't even gone out on the date and he was already nervous, curse Malik for making him feel even worse!
"Why?" Malik purred in return, "Did you want a quickie with me for practice before Bakura?" Giving his friend a racy little wink as a joke, Malik cackled. "'Cause baby, just say the words and I'll take the shirt off myself!"
…Not funny. Before Malik could do or say anything, probably because he was too busy dying because of his own joke, Ryou literally jumped over the table, taking down his friend onto the living room floor, Malik's head colliding with the entertainment center and Ryou's calves knocking against the coffee table ends. It didn't matter though, a little pain was worth pulverizing Malik over.
"Shit, ow!" Malik cried, a chuckle still leaving him, even as he laid there upon the floor, head now pounding from injury.
"You stupid jerk! Don't say bad things like that to me!" Ryou cried, a giggle breaking through as he attempted to warily hit his friend, who, even when laughing, was able to stop the weak blows from hitting his shoulder. Finally, the two couldn't take it anymore, and Ryou collapsed atop the other, laughing into his neck. "You're the real ass, you know that?" Mumbled Ryou as he rolled off the other onto his back, head turned so he could watch him. Malik nodded, head turning as well, hand lifting to cradle the new bruise forming on his head.
"Heh, yeah, I know. You can't blame me though. You're so easy to tease! You get so flustered every time, it's good entertainment!" Malik chimed, grin peaking through, eyes closing as he gave a whine, wincing as he went to sit up. "God, remind me to tell Bakura you're violent in bed too. That should turn him on a great deal."
"Malik!" Ryou exclaimed, slapping the other on the hip. "Shut up! I don't even want to think about that!"
"Ow, again! And why? Bakura's fucking gorgeous, you have every right to think about him like that." Cracking an eye closed, Malik faced the other, who began to sit up as well, pulling his knees to his chest like he always did when on the floor.
"Yeah, h-he's good looking, but that doesn't mean you have to say crap like that. B-Bakura's a…nice guy, or at least I think so. Besides, he probably isn't that into me or anything, anyways. I bet you anything he just meant to go out as friends." 'Seriously Ryou, even you have to know better than that, stupid! Calling people "cute" before asking them out usually doesn't signify going out as just friends.'
Biting his lip, Ryou shrugged. "I, I just don't…-"
"Don't want to get ahead of yourself? Please." Malik rolled his opened lilac hue, teeth gritting for a moment as his head gave another painful thud. Ryou noticing this, began to feel a bit guilty…
Then he remembered what Malik had said and felt a little less sympathetic. However, since Ryou was so nice even after inflicting pain on Malik himself, that still didn't mean he wasn't going to go and get his friend an ice pack. Standing up, he eyed his left leg, as it was throbbing as well from hitting it on the table. 'Maybe I should get two ice packs', he thought to himself, glancing to Malik.
Get ahead of himself? But…he wasn't trying to! Not about sex and not like -that-! As Ryou was about to open his mouth to voice his opinion, Malik beat him to it. "You're too cute, Ryou. You don't need to worry about people not liking you. If he didn't think you weren't hot, he probably wouldn't have asked you out, so there." Eyeing his friend back, Malik leant against the entertainment center, eyes closing. "Mm…you made me hit my head pretty bad, you know?"
"…Oh, yeah. I was just about to go and get an ice pack, sorry!" And before Malik could say anything else on the matter of Bakura, Ryou hurried off to the kitchen. It wasn't like Malik thought, or he didn't think it was, at least. It wasn't really Bakura liking him Ryou was worried about!
…Or maybe it was, but still. The same thought as before ran through his mind. Even if Bakura liked him and wanted a relationship, he was lost on how to go about it or even what to do when he saw the other come tonight. Of course, there was no way he'd back out on the date but…
It was still scary to him to enter into new territory like that. Sighing and giving an annoyed look down to his leg, Ryou yanked open the black door of his freezer, limbs reaching in to dig out two different ice packs. As he shut the door and staggered on his way back to the living room, he glanced at the clock. '11:50. Ack, they should be here any second and Malik still hasn't brushed his hair or anything!' Feeling stupid now for getting his friend off track, he rushed back to the living room as fast as his injured leg could hobble, falling back onto the couch to nurse at it.
"Malik!" The other looked over to him and caught the flying ice bag just in time, immediately pressing the cold bundle to his head in relief. "You still aren't ready yet. You haven't brushed your teeth or hair."
Just as Malik was about to answer, the noise of loud footsteps became audible and the door burst open, the sound of Katsuya's loud voice highly distinguishable.
"'Ay! Where the hell are you guys at!"
Malik grinned and gave Ryou a satisfied look.
"Looks like I won't be having to, Mom."
So, not the most eventful chapter, I'm sorry!
Heart, heart. Sniff.
I just really wanted to go in depth a bit on Malik and Ryou's relationship and that took me forever, so…
I decided to actually get a chapter out before the end of the week and not wait another bazillion days, because it would've been another 10 pages or more just to get to the date, start it, and maybe end it.
Next chapter though, for sure! And…the rest of the band will be revealed. It's good, I promise. XD
Thank you all for reading! Please review and I hope you all have the most bomb-sauce days ever.
As for the next chapter, I'm HOPING it'll be out by next Sunday. Yay for me and possibly being consistent!