Character (mention or present): sasuke, itachi, naruto, sakura, kakashi, haku
Warning: well, this story isn't written to be incestuous but if you want it to be, I guess you can. It's a little angst.
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto
Summary: Sasuke's diary is found by someone who read it
Well, first I'm not English… so please forgive my mistakes (you can tell me, I will correct them). This is my first fanfiction in English (I have already written one in French).
Please R&R if you can
He sat on the cold floor and dug. It was buried pretty deep. At least he caught it: a dark diary with the Uchiha fan on the middle. He opened it and went through the pages.
Today Aniki let me watch him train. That means he trusts me, doesn't he? Well a ninja only shows his Jutsu to his enemies in order to kill them. And Aniki showed them to me, so he trusts me not to betray his secrets! Even if he didn't help me train, I'm glad.
Aniki helped me again. If he hadn't been there… father would not have agreed to come.
I'm useless… to father… to Itachi-niisan.
The dark figure flipped the pages. This was not interesting. He stopped when he saw some torn pages. Pages almost blank expect for big words craved on them.
I hate you! I will destroy you!
Why! Why me!
Those red eyes of yours are they red from crying? Red from all the blood you've seen? Red from all the blood you've shed?
I know why mine are red… they are red from crying, from the blood you've made me see… red from hatred… from love.
Love and hatred, the different face of a same sheet, so cliché, so true. Maybe a cliché is just something that is always true, through the ages…
I haven't forgiven you. How could I? You killed everyone, you killed my dream… you throw me in loneliness. Was it because you were lonely back then? You wanted me to feel it?
Were you lonely even when I was with you?
I have the Sharingan… not fully awaken but I have it!
When I protected Naruto from Haku, jumping in front of him and taking the needles, I thought I was going to die. I told him "My brother… I told myself I wouldn't die until I killed him… Don't die". My last thoughts were for you, Aniki. I wondered if you would even notice I was gone, that nobody would come after you to kill you. Would you be angry because I couldn't even do what you had ordered me? Would you be sad? I think you wouldn't have cared less. You wouldn't have noticed.
Naruto and Sakura told me… I looked peaceful… it was the first time they had seen such a worriless expression on me. I will never tell them, nobody will ever know why… It's not mother I saw, nor father… it was you Niisan… it was that old you I loved so much… you were waiting for me, not with a smile, not with arms spread… just standing and waving at me, just like you used to before poking my head with two fingers.
I was jealous… a little of Naruto who grow so fast… but mostly of Haku. He was stronger. He died for his dream, a real one. Killing you is my dream? So why does it hurt so much? I will never forgive you, I will kill you for betraying the clan, for betraying me. But I wish I had a real dream… like fighting with you, side by side, being useful for you? I'm getting strong for you… but it's not the same, is it?
Today I went to your bedroom. So tidy like usual. Still full of you. I could almost see you on your chair, on your bed, sitting at the window… like the ghost you've become, haunting me.
I lied on your bed, your smell still linger there. I fell asleep… it's been a long time since I slept like that, so deeply… I felt safe. How can I feel so safe on the bed of a murderer? On the bed of the one who betray me? On the bed of the person I will kill.
It's been a long time since I write… with the Chuunin exam I had not time. The Hokage is dead. That Orochimaru who wants me is strong.
I hate Naruto for being able to deceived Gaara… I was too weak to protect Naruto or Sakura… AGAIN… so fucking weak…
Kakashi is training me, I will get stronger! I swear! I'm improving…
I'm shivering… I made a dream about you. Not a usual one. You were calling me… are you near?
You beat me so easily as if I hadn't improved since last time! I couldn't do anything!
Why do you care about Naruto? Why! I was there! You didn't give a damn!
I WAS THERE!
"Even if you are successful in your revenge, all you'll be left with is emptiness" He said.
What if I had told him I'm planning to die with you?
I left Konoha.
My dreams lie in the past.
I said to Naruto that when ninja connected their fists they understand each other. I want to fight you to know your heart. But will I be strong enough? If the difference is too big it won't work, does it?
Why can't I forget who you were?
I'm not scared of Orochimaru, not anymore. He's way stronger than me… but so weak compare to you. A baby learn to crawl then to walk and after to run. At the beginning, when I first face you that day, I was crawling. The second time I was walking. Orochimaru will teach me to run, and I will run to you. Step by step I'm getting closer. Can you hear me?
I read my diary. It's full of bullshit. You would laugh like hell… except you never laugh… you would be angry.
"I will kill" ah ah ah ah. I'm always so sure… Never asking myself if I will ever be stronger than you. What if I don't succeed? Will you come to kill me?
I wish you would…
They are face to face at last. On their guard… even if Itachi doesn't look like it.
When his hand moves, Sasuke braces himself.
Sasuke's not sure to have succeeded in not looking surprise when Itachi produce his diary. They have their eyes locked, red sharingan eyes.
- Did you read it?