Title: Seigaku Fight-O!
Date: April 10, 2006
Authoress: Urchin Power
Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters used within this story.
Category: Humour/Animal Cruelty
Synopsis: To increase team spirit the regulars decide to head for the zoo. Of course, things never go quite as well as planned.
Pairings: Tezuka x Fuji, slight Oishi x Kikumaru
Note: I love National Geographic which inspired this fic. I hope you have fun reading this!
Right before Nationals, Oishi Syuichiro decided that it was best they forget a little about the upcoming competition and just have fun. Since a certain redhead held more power over the fukubuchou than one can possibly imagine, it was decided that they go to the zoo. Of course, Tezuka was reluctant on the decision, but since Fuji fully supported the redhead being his best friend, Tezuka had finally agreed. Besides, Fuji liked animals and it had been awhile since he interacted with animals ever since Maple died, being the beautiful carp in his koi pond.
"Make sure you're always with someone! We are to meet here at exactly six! Disperse!" Tezuka ordered upon arriving at the front gates. At once the group of Regulars slowly separated into their smaller packs.
"Nya! Let's check out the monkeys!" Kikumaru yelled excitedly instantly latching onto his best friend. Fuji let out a small chuckle allowing the redhead to drag him along. Tezuka and Oishi shared wearied glances before following the chattering duo. Of course, they didn't immediately head to the monkeys seeing an ice cream vendor.
"It looks like Momo." Kikumaru said with a smug look on his face.
"It does look like Momo." Oishi replied staring into said monkey, eyes unblinking. He seemed absolutely fixated. At his side, the redhead continued to lick his strawberry ice cream, laughing animatedly and pointing.
"Let's check out the baboons!" Kikumaru exclaimed after gobbling down the last of his cone. Oishi finally turned away from the cage upon hearing their change of destinations.
"Tezuka, Fuji are you guys coming with us?" Oishi asked looking around for the other two in their group. He felt his jaw drop, rigidly turning to share nervous glances with his doubles partner.
Tezuka and Fuji were currently making out right in front of parents and their children.
"So that's why Fujiko decided to dress that way." Kikumaru said squeakily, grabbing onto Oishi's arm and dragging him off. Oishi gave him a questioning glance, a huge blush visible on both their faces. "He told me that there'd be a lot of kids running around and they're probably not open to… boy-boy stuff." The redhead explained.
"And that's reason enough for Fuji to wear a spaghetti strapped top with too short shorts?" Oishi blinked.
"More or less." Kikumaru replied.
"So where are the baboons?" Oishi pondered pulling out a small map he took while at the gates. He quickly consulted it before getting dragged off by the redhead still latched onto his arm.
"Zebras!" Kikumaru yelled excitedly.
"Equus burchelli." A small boy corrected from where the two stood leaning on the railing. The redhead turned his head slightly to regard the boy with a curious frown. Oishi had a similar reaction. "Idiots. It's the scientific name for zebra." The boy explained with a smug look on his face.
"How old are you?" Kikumaru asked with a small pout.
"Ten. And you old man?" The boy asked smirking lightly.
"Unya! I'm not old! Who cares what zebras are called anyways, nya… It's not like people use the scientific names any ways." Kikumaru replied defensively crossing his arms.
"Eiji…" Oishi warned placing a hand on the redhead's shoulder as though restraining him.
"Nya?" The boy chuckled in a mocking voice, "Is that a verb?"
"Why you-" The redhead yelled lifting up a fist.
"Oishi-senpai! Eiji-senpai!" Kikumaru gradually let his hand drop upon hearing his name. Oishi on the other hand had a look of relief on his face. Both Momoshiro and a frowning Echizen made their way up to them. "What's going on here?" Momoshiro questioned seeing a small pout on the redhead's face and the extreme look of amusement plastered onto the small boy's features.
"This brat is acting all smart nya!" Kikumaru complained.
"Brat?" Momoshiro asked.
"Brat is a noun. It is used to describe especially spoiled children or ill-mannered ones. I however am neither. So you are using a word out of context." The boy said calmly, placing a hand on either of his hips.
"What a brat!" Momoshiro exclaimed.
"I know nya!" Kikumaru agreed.
"Mada Mada Dane." Echizen murmured taking a sip of his Ponta.
"What do I have a lot more to work on?" The boy asked, pushing thick glasses up the bridge of his nose. Echizen lowered his cap. Slowly, the three older teenagers took several steps backwards.
"Your face." Echizen finally muttered.
"My face?" The boy smirked. "Is that the best you can come up with?"
"Yea. Because you're damn ugly." Echizen smirked back. The boy let his mouth fall open looking very similar to a fish, as Echizen took the last sip of his Ponta tossing it into a far off trashcan like a professional.
"If I'm ugly, you're repulsive and-and unattractive." The boy yelled back pointing a shaking finger at the still smirking first year.
"I wish. Then I'd finally get some sleep rather than running away from my fans." Echizen replied casually. The boy finally gave the messy haired teen the dirtiest look before storming off.
"Well, we now know who's the ultimate brat." Momoshiro joked. He turned towards his two senpai, "We're going to the food court. You guys want to join?"
"Leaching off your senpai?" Kikumaru grinned. "Sorry, sorry! But we're going to see the baboons!"
"We'll see you later." Oishi smiled.
"Whenever I see baboons, they make me laugh." Kikumaru commented as the pair took a small turn past a small cage containing a sleeping koala. They continued, finally stopping at their desired attraction. At once the redhead let out a small bout of laugher. Oishi lifted a brow as though asking, 'what's funny?'
"Its butt is blue." Kikumaru chortled grasping his stomach in pain. Oishi tilted his head to get a better view. It was indeed blue. Nevertheless, he was still confused. Would it still be funny if it weren't?
"If its butt were green, would it still be funny?" Oishi questioned.
Kikumaru let out a new wave of giggles. It took a few minutes for the redhead to settle down replying in a cracked voice, "Oishi said butt!" The vice-captain felt his shoulders slump at his teammate's immaturity.
"Why don't we go check out the gorillas?" Oishi shook his head gabbing the shaking redhead by both shoulders and slowly steering him away. Besides, parents were beginning to stare at them nonsensically.
"Look! It's Inui and Taka-san!" Kikumaru greeted hopping next to the data specialist and a bored looking teen. "Where's Kaidoh?"
"I seemed to have lost him in the bat cave." Inui replied scribbling something in his infamous green notebook before turning his gaze back upwards, eyes locking with an overweight gorilla. Kawamura gave the two a small look, which seemed to be pleading with them.
"What're you doing nya?" Kikumaru blinked.
"There's a 89 percent chance he'll go for that banana, but he hasn't yet. He stumped my data." Inui said breathlessly, erasing something he wrote and writing over it. Kikumaru and Oishi shared nervous glances before also looking into the cage. The gorilla was merely sitting there, from time to time scratching his belly before letting his hand go limp by his side. Kikumaru and Oishi glanced at each other once more.
"They're boring nya!" Kikumaru whined.
"Again. He's like Tezuka or Fuji. I can't get correct readings on him." Inui said with irritation in his voice. Kikumaru blinked and took a step back, clinging onto the sleeve of Oishi's shirt. Slowly with Kawamura, they backed off until the data specialist was finally out of view.
"I'm so sorry for hanging out with you guys like this." Kawamura apologized instantly.
"No problem Taka-san, you're our friend." Oishi replied with a comforting smile.
"Why'd you be sorry anyways?" Kikumaru blinked.
"Well… This must be like a date for you two… right?" Kawamura replied with a small blush making its way onto his face.
"Date? Nya! No!" Kikumaru blushed.
"Yes, we're not dating." Oishi agreed.
"Well… Fuji told me." Kawamura said nervously bringing a hand up to scratch the back of his neck. Kikumaru let out a giant whine burying a tomato red face in his hands. Finally shrugging off his initial embarrassment, he turned conversation elsewhere, "Let's go check out the wolves. They should be around here, ne?"
"I think they're somewhere to our right." Oishi commented pulling out a map. Not that said map came to any use as he was simply dragged along by the over impulsive redhead. It was after he realized that the attractions were posted on small directional signs that he reluctantly kept the map in his backpack.
"They're so cute! They look so cuddly!" Kikumaru exclaimed leaning forward on the railing, similar to what he did to the zebras.
"Their eyes are yellow." Kawamura commented also looking in with slight interest.
"Nya! Look! This one's looking at me!" The redhead laughed leaning forward even more while extending his arm to point animatedly.
"Eiji, don't lean over so much or else-" Oishi warned before the redhead toppled over the railing and indeed fell into the cage. Oishi let out a petrified scream, seeing where the redhead landed. His green orbs grew wide. The redhead had landed on his butt, which was now being rubbed ferociously in pain by a groaning redhead. That wasn't the problem. What made Oishi totally lose his mind was the fact that wolves were slowly surrounding him.
A crowd of people began to surround the pit all pointing with horrified expressions on their faces watching as the middle school student sat rigid, now being circled by animals he previously dubbed cute and cuddly. "Don't worry! Burning!" Kawamura yelled grabbing a tennis racquet from a random person's backpack before jumping into the impoundment to fend off the animals. The powerhouse let out a mild gasp of shock letting the racquet fall from his hands. It was for badminton!
"Don't worry guy! I'll get help!" Oishi yelled turning his head around. He immediately spotted the zookeeper.
"Sorry kid." The man replied with a nervous look on his face, "There's no way I'm going in there. We didn't feed them much lately because we're putting on a show later this week… I wouldn't go in there." Oishi's eyes widened turning his attention back to his two friends in the cage.
"You toss me over by those rocks and I'll try to get their attention. Then you can climb up those rocks and I'll grab onto that tree thing…" The redhead planned quietly to which Oishi found himself sweat-dropping along with a few others who had crowded around. He nearly had a heart attack when one of the wolves suddenly charged, but was immediately fended off by Kawamura who had grabbed the redhead and swung him around so his shoe made contact with the wolf's face. They regained their stances, back to back watching as the wolves slowly made their way closer to them.
"Crap! That's Taka-san and Eiji-senpai!" Momoshiro yelled much to Oishi's relief upon hearing a familiar voice upon this sea of unrecognizable people. But much to his distress, Momoshiro also jumped in leaving behind a frowning Echizen to sip carefully on his Ponta standing casually next to Oishi.
"How can you stay so relaxed?" Oishi twitched.
"I knew Momo-senpai was going to drag me around all day, so I took some pills. I've been swallowing them down with Ponta." Echizen shrugged taking another sip of his Ponta. Oishi let out a pained moan before turning back towards the enclosure. Momoshiro and Kawamura both had their fists up ready for attack, and Kikumaru stood in a fighter's stance… much like the stance in that Karate movie they saw last week. Oishi was about ready to faint.
"What's going on here?" Tezuka asked. Oishi was flooded with relief.
"E-Eiji fell in by accident! Taka-san and Momoshiro jumped in and- they jumped in and they're fighting those wolves. Zookeeper. Him!" Oishi pointed to said man, "Won't go in, and the bloody thirsty wolves! Gah!"
"Eiji's in there?" Fuji said pushing a small child to the side to look fully into the cage, "and Taka-san! Momo!" Before anyone could react, Fuji jumped in too.
"Te-" Oishi turned around to regard the buchou but found himself speechless. Tezuka had all colour drained from his face as he stared into the enclosure. He turned to regard the first year, but Echizen merely took a sip from his Ponta looking rather unfazed.
"Okay! Dream team here!" Kikumaru said getting back to back with the cage's newcomer. Fuji nodded, raising his right arm to meet Kikumaru's forming an 'X'. Kawamura and Momoshiro had similar triumphant looks on their faces, rolling up their sleeves similar to the Rokkaku match they had. A large black wolf who stood near the middle, gave a high-pitched howl. The rest of the wolves immediately stopped in their tracks.
"That's Dennis. He's the alpha male of the pack." The zookeeper explained to both Tezuka and Oishi. They all watched in fear as the wolf slowly made its way up to them looking rather casual and some may call it sleek. "I think he's claiming that girl as his mate."
"Girl?" Oishi blinked turning his attention back into the pit. Tezuka twitched.
Surely enough, Dennis walked around the four before coming at a halt before Fuji. With its large muzzle it began to caress the tensai's leg gently letting out low growls. Oishi turned nervously to stare at the captain. Tezuka's eye twitched. And twitched. And twitched before he jumped in as well. The crowd gasped upon seeing the wolf flick its tongue mockingly, exposing sharp teeth. Tezuka merely glared back. It was a good five minutes until Dennis turned its head, running around the small enclosure followed by the rest of the wolves.
"What are they doing?" Someone near Oishi questioned.
"It looks like laps."
"I think so."
Oishi finally fainted.
It was exactly six when they all met up at the front gates and boarded the bus. Tezuka had spent the remainder of their time in the zoo making out with Fuji, while Kikumaru accompanied Oishi to the medical ward. Momoshiro and Kawamura were chatting about their latest victory against the wolves, Echizen looking rather pale with drool dripping from the side of his mouth. And Inui was of course in front of the gorillas the whole time.
They were all on the bus exhausted from their day, some like Echizen and Momoshiro falling asleep.
Urchin Power: Poor wolves! Well, I hope that everyone enjoyed reading this!