Konoha's Number 1 Pervert

Who knew Sakura, the budding cherry blossom (of youth!) would find herself undeniably attracted to him. Clichés, humor, borderline smutty descriptions (not enough to exceed the rating), and one of my favorite pairs possible, though you may find it very weird.

Disclaimer: If I owned him...well I sure as hell wouldn't be sharing.

It was hot. The kind of sluggish heat that slid along walls and sheets and made the surface of everything and body unbareable to deal with. The kind of hot that made girls walk around in small tight shirts and guys without any shirt at all, and dogs with their tongues lolling out, too tired and stuffy to bark at any danger nearby.

At most, a tiny snuff was heard from a windowsill, only to be followed with a silent yawn that made all the girls who saw turn doe-eyed by the adorable qualities of watching a dog yawn.

Which was why, on this hot day, a certain lazy, perverted older ninja was lying stretched out on his bed, shirt off and sheets flung unconsciously on the floor. His normally messy hair was mussed even further from rolling around in suffocating night air and almost shone a pure white in the glaring mid-morning sun.

The parts of his face that weren't concealed by his arm seemed to be wavering between complete fulfillment and a certain sort of pleasurable pain. It would have been an odd sight to see, someone's brow scrunched up as though in pain and a smile on their face at the same time, but he wasn't Konoha's number one pervert for nothing.

Sakura, determined girl that she was, hesistated outside of the ninja's apartment door, unsure of whether to knock and wait or just barge right in. But knowing this ninja's penchant for leaving rooms by the window and the likelihood of taking ten minutes just to open the damn door, she decided on the latter.

So she started to raise her foot to break the wood from it's hinges, and surely wake up the owner of the humble abode, before reconsidering and trying the doorknob. The brass felt cool against her heated skin and she rolled her eyes as the knob turned smoothly, indicating that he probably had forgotten to lock it. Not that he needed too, not only was he a pervert of Konoha, but he was also one of the most elite.

She politely removed her shoes then stepped inside. She took a few seconds to gather her bearings. She had never actually been in here before, though she was positive Naruto had plenty of times, and maybe even Sasuke. A fairly large bookcase, with row upon row of familiar orange books was the first thing she saw. Then her eyes roamed over a very messy desk, littered with writing utensils and paper, a small couch, lamp, then the kitchen counter. A single cup of Ramen stood on the slab of smooth marble. Naruto's eating habits must have rubbed off on him after all those years of traveling together she thought with a tone of amusement.The frown when she noticed several sake bottles littered on the floor.

Obviously no one was in the living room/kitchen. Which meant he must be in the room with the closed door, since the only other door was open and leading to a light blue empty bathroom. She walked over to the closed door and hesistantly grasped the knob. Barging into someone's bedroom was a bit more personal than barging into their living room. She could feel the pulse of his chakra behind the doorway, the steady delayed beating of his heart which meant he was sleeping. She rolled her eyes, trust him to sleep in on today of all days.

She started to turn the knob, then stopped. What if he was in an indecent state of dress. Or worse, she hypothesized (momentarily forgetting that she had only sensed one human body behind the door) if he was with a girl? Or, two girls, Or three girls, which would probably fit his reputation better, or even… she barged into the room ready to give him a piece of her mind but stopped short. She wasn't sure the sight in front of her was one her eyes would get used to, especially since she had never seen him quite so unclothed before. Whenever he was training with Naruto, he definitely left his clothes on.

In front of her lay a sleeping, very shirtless…


And for some stupid reason her face became surprisingly hot. Not entirely sure that this was a good thing, she began to tiptoe forward. Though it wasn't really necessary seeing as her stomping a moment before hadn't woken the her former teacher from his apparently, and here she flushed even more as she noted the pleased way his eyes were closed, pleasant sleep.

It wasn't that she'd never seen a shirtless guy before, or hell even a naked guy before. She was eighteen afterall, and had, had her fair share of experience. Though that certainly didn't prepare her for seeing her older, former sensei lying flush on his bed, shirtless. Nor did it prepare her for the strange feeling of partial panic, embarassment, and wonder that she found the sight of him in such a state incredibly… hot. Not just hot, incredibly, completely, and wholely, H-O-T-T. His bare skin shone in the sunlight, body sprawled against his mattress. Body vulnerable, which he never was, and formed entirely perfect, plus or minus a few scars.

Eh you pervert! Inner Sakura, now more mature in appearance, but still just as feisty yelled. Stop staring at your sensei and get out of here. You can pretend it never happened. Stop looking! He's old. And your teacher. And OLD. And a pervert. And old. And…

Kakashi shifted the tiniest bit and his pants, which were barely brushing the tops of his hips, sank lower, revealing the smooth, sleek bump of a well formed hipbone.

…hot, so very hot. And not that old, only by a decade or so. And did I say sensei? I meant former sensei.

"Yo." Gah! Sakura's cheeks deepened to an even darker red as her heart skipped a beat about four beats. Slowly she dragged her eyes up from Kakashi's bare hips, over his abs, which shone one right after another under r a light sheen of sweat, over his well-defined, broad, but not too broad, chest, and nice shoulders, up his smooth neck, over the arm covering the bottom half of his face to his eyes.

His closed eyes.

Sakura's eyes widened. Didn't she just hear someone speak? She was positive of it, though maybe the guilt of her staring at a shirtless, hot, Kakashi was getting to her-

"Yo, up here" Sakura dragged her face away from Kakashi's to see a tracking dog, she remembered his name was Pakkun, staring at her in his lazy-eyed dog way. Sakura blinked.

"Eh, now that you're here I suppose I can leave. I was supposed to wake him up on time but I must have dozed off." The dog explained, voice in a bored monotone. "Since you're here, I'll be going now." Without another word he disappeared in a slight puff of smoke, leaving Sakura slightly dazed. She had just been caught oogling Kakashi, by his own tracking dog.

Shaking her head, her eyes fell from the window onto Kakashi's face.

Kakashi's face, which looked strange for some reason.

And as she stared at the arm blocking her view, she realized.

She was staring at his face, his maskless face.

Granted there was an arm thrown across, which obstructed the view, but his face was devoid of any sort of cloth. His left eye was closed, a scar running down vertically across it, hiding the Sharingan underneath.

Sakura gave a sort of fangirl excited scream, looked left, then right, making sure no one was watching, then hurriedly bent over until she just a few inches away from the top half of his nose. She took a few moments to examine it thoroughly. After all these years, after so many failed attempts, she was finally seeing it for the first time. It wasn't any paler than the rest of his skin, which was odd, since one would think that after being covered for so long it would be less tanned. She reached a finger up, unable to help herself, and brushed a finger across it's surface.

His skin was smooth, so smooth, and cool, even though it was so hot (She was sure her face was all sweaty and gross now, even though she was wearing a short pair of training shorts and a tank top for comfort.) She was so inticed by the discovery of his smooth, pore free skin that she failed to notice his hand twitch on the bed. So absorbed with trying to figure out how to gentlely dislodge his arm from his face without waking him, that she didn't notice his body was moving until it was too late.

Then the most horribly cliché, plot opener for a tension promising situation happened. Kakashi's other arm swung around her form, and before she knew it, she was trapped on the bed lying partially on his body.

His hot, firm, barely clothed body.



That was all he was aware of. He could feel the heat radiating form the windows as well, but this heat was definitely different.

It was coming from a slender body.

His hand brushed over the smooth skin of a wrist and he pressed the body closer to himself. He heard a soft gasp and smiled, turning his head to bury it into the pillow, his arm snaking it's way across the person's waist.

Which was clothed.

Kakashi frowned slightly. Usually when he woke to find a women in his bed she was definitely not clothed. Especially after the things that occurred the night before. But strangely not only was this woman clothed, Kakashi ran a hand down her side to her hip to make sure, she was fully clothed. Kakashi pondered this for a moment in a sleepy haze, then smirked into his pillow.

Well now, he could fix that.

He rubbed her hip for a second, before finding the hem of her shirt and sliding his fingers smoothly underneath. He turned toward her and felt her mouth slightly brush his neck, her breath tickling just below his Adam's apple. He moved his fingertips up a few inches to her bellybutton before slowly circling it with his thumb. Torturously slow. He felt her begin to quiver and he ground his hips lightly against hers hearing a small "Eep" in response.

He lowered his lips to her ear, murmuring in a sleep induced low voice,

"Does that feel good?"

"Ka-Kakashi." Her voice was barely above a whisper, but he could hear the frantic plea in it and he reached forward to slowly run his toungue along her lobe, hand inching steadily upward, eyes still closed until…

"PERVERT!" A very loud, very familiar, very young voice shouted. Kakashi's eyes opened to a blur of pink that quickly whirled away from him, leaving him to fall face first in his pillow.

Pink. Hair. Those two words kept repeating over and over in his head. Pink. Hair.

Then another realization came into his mind, horrifying and slightly disappointing him,

She's seen my face.

Eh, expecting Jiraiya?

Author's Note added 3/20/07: I found out someone took this story and posted it as their own. NOT COOL and shows unoriginality. Do not do this again please.