Hey y'all! This is my Easter fic, dedicated to all the ham-hams! Have a happy Easter everyone!
The Happenings of Ham-Ham Easter by cappyandpashy4ever
Silence hovered over the clubhouse as the ham-hams snuggled in their covers that happy Easter morning.
Suddenly, Penelope rose from her bed, crept out of her room and into Pashmina's, and leapt onto Pashmina and screamed "Ookwee! Ookwee!" in her ear.
Oh yes, did I forget to mention that it was FIVE FREAKING A.M.?
"Penelope…" Pashmina moaned, rubbing her eyes. "What is it?"
"Ookwee! Ookyoo!" Penelope jumped up and down.
"I'm sorry Penny." Pashmina said. "We can't play that game. It's too early."
"Ookwee." Penelope sounded disappointed.
"Okay, fine." Pashmina gave in. "Let's play everyone's favorite game, see what Maxwell wrote in his diary last night!"
Penelope and Pashmina trudged silently into Maxwell's room, where Maxwell was sleeping in his Albert Einstein pajamas.
"Okay Penelope." Pashmina said to her. "Go get the diary from the hiding place. It's in the pillowcase this week."
Penelope walked to Maxwell's pillow. Maxwell was muttering in his sleep.
"E MC2! No…that's not the answer. I need the root of pi plus the multiplex of thirty three multiplied by seventeen…"
"Ookwee!" Penelope whispered into Maxwell's sleeping ear.
"That's right…" Maxwell muttered, still asleep. "The answer is ookwee. Why didn't I see it before? I win the Nobel Prize! I'm rich! I'm gonna go buy…a date with Sandy…"
Maxwell rose out of bed, sleepwalking, and left the room.
"We'll deal with him later." Pashmina whispered to Penelope. "Now go get that diary Penny!"
Penelope reached inside the pillow and pulled out a small book. She handed it to Pashmina.
"Dang it!" Pashmina yelled. "It's locked!"
"You're right Penelope, I bet the key would be under Toadbert Einstein's hat."
Pashmina walked over to Maxwell's stuffed toad with puffy white hair. She lifted up his cap, and sure enough, sitting under the hat was a shiny silver diary key.
Pashmina inserted it into the diary and it opened instantly. She opened the most recent entry and read out loud:
"Books books books books books books books books Sandy books books books…"
"Wow," said Pashmina. "That was predictable."
"Ookwee." Penelope sounded disappointed.
"I'm sorry Maxwell is such a wimp, Penelope." Pashmina said.
"You're right! Let's go check out Boss's diary!"
Pashmina and Penelope left the room.
The two girls entered Boss's room a few moments later. They found Boss's diary under his hat as always. Boss didn't lock his diary. Pashmina opened it and read aloud:
"Dear diary, today I have the perfect plan to finally go out with Bijou. Once it fails, I'll go dig nine holes to make me feel better. Then I'll go to my four o' clock bikini waxing."
Pashmina stopped reading here, too disgusted to go on. She and Penelope started screaming.
"Ahh! Eww! Gross! Ahh!" Pashmina screamed.
"Ookwee, ookwee!" Penelope shouted.
"What the devil?" Boss yelled, stumbling out of bed at the loud noise. He tripped over the diary that Pashmina had dropped, fell onto the floor, and he sent his hat flying.
The hat soared into Bijou's room and hit the mirror that instantly shattered. Boss went to go comfort Bijou but accidentally stumbled into Sandy's room, and fell on Sandy in her bed.
Sandy shrieked and lassoed Boss with her ribbon. Boss went flying into Stan's room. Stan yelled "What the heck?" and leapt off his bed, landing on his skateboard. He lost control of the skateboard and rolled into Cappy's room next door. Cappy screamed, which startled Stan who fell off his skateboard and landed on the floor.
The skateboard kept on going and rolled into Cappy's closet. It came out a moment later with a hat on it. Cappy went off chasing the hat.
Cappy jumped onto the skateboard to reclaim his hat and ended up crashing into Oxnard's room. There sat Oxnard, eating from and Easter basket, with all the other baskets around him.
"Oh," said Oxnard, guiltily. "Hello there…Cappy."
"YOU STOLE OUR EASTER BASKETS!" Cappy yelled. "GUYS, GET HIM!"
Suddenly all the ham-hams appeared in Oxnard's room, except Maxwell who was still sleepwalking, and when they left, Oxnard was left with only his original basket, and a few bruises.
"Ow" Oxnard said.
"Hey Oxo! Hows about you and me trade candies?" said Howdy, who appeared in the doorway.
"Wait, did you say Oxo, I mean sure, what do you have?" asked Oxnard
"Well, I'll trade you a Choco Log for a truffle!" replied Howdy.
"What? A measly Choco Log for a truffle!"
"Um… yeah." said Howdy.
"No way!" said Oxnard.
"Why" asked Howdy.
"Because truffles are good, Choco Logs are good!"
"Then Why Won't you trade?" asked Howdy.
"Because I can buy Choco Logs at the store. I can buy truffles at the store for TWO FIFTY PER PACK!" screamed Oxnard, who stomped out of the room.
Maxwell was still wandering around the clubhouse, saying "Date with Sandy."
He sleepwalked into a certain tiger-striped ham's room.
"Sandy…" he muttered to the tiger-striped ham. "Will you go out with me?"
"No way man! What is wrong with you?" screamed Stan.
Then all the hams ate pie.
Panda walks out onto the set. "What kind of ending is that? Who wrote this?"
Panda jumps out of the computer and sees a monkey typing on the keyboard.
"A monkey?" Panda yelled. "What did you do to cappyandpashy4ever?"
"Oo oo ee ee ah ah!" said the monkey.
"What do you mean she's eating pie!" Panda yelled at the monkey.
"PANDA!" Melissa's best friend Emily yelled, suddenly appearing randomly. "You're my favorite ham-ham! I LOVE YOU!" Emily tackles Panda and huggles him.
"Wait," choked Panda. "You're Melissa's best friend? Then will you mind telling me WHERE THE HECK MELISSA IS?"
"Didn't the monkey tell you?" replied Emily. "She's eating pie."
"WHY HAS EVERYONE GONE INSANE?" Panda screamed.
A few minutes after Panda has Emily locked up in the sponge room, Panda goes into Melissa's kitchen. Melissa is in there eating pie.
"Melissa! Thank goodness I found you!" Panda yelled.
"Oh, hey Panda." Said Melissa. "I've just been here eating my blueberry pie and-"
"Did you say blueberry pie?" said Panda. "We are not alone."
Suddenly, a rumbling sound came from the pie. A moment later, a cream colored blob erupted from the pie.
"I AM PRETZEL!" the blob yelled. "I LIKE BLUEBERRY PIE!"
"Panda? Melissa yelled. "Escape to the computer!"
Panda ran to the computer and leapt inside it.
"Emily!" Melissa shouted. "We've got another person to keep you company in the sponge room!"
Melissa tossed Pretzel into the room in a strait jacket. Pretzel landed next to Emily who is also wearing a strait jacket.
"I like blueberry pie!" said Pretzel.
"I like Panda." Said Emily. "And pie."
"Pie, pie, pie…" Pretzel and Emily shouted.
Melissa was about to walk away, and Pretzel and Emily ran up to the window of the sponge room.
"When come back, bring pie!" Pretzel yelled.
"And Panda!" yelled Emily.
"If I remember…" Melissa muttered, walking away. She kicked the monkey off the computer and returned to the story…
"Aww," said Oxnard. "I ate all my candy and I'm still hungry.
"Here you go Oxnard!" Melissa shouted, dropping truckloads of candy into the computer. "Anything for my favorite hammy!"
"Hey Bijou," said Boss. "Want to go out with me?"
"No." said Bijou.
"Oh well. Time to go dig nine holes!"
For some reason, at these words, Pashmina and Penelope looked like they were going to puke.
"Well," said Melissa. "This was sure one great Easter fic, don't you agree, Panda?"
"PANDA!" yelled Emily. "I LOVE YOU PANDA!"
"BACK TO THE SPONGE ROOM WITH YOU!" Melissa thrust Emily into the room.
"Happy Easter everyone!" Sunflower Princess yelled, waving to everyone.
"GOODBYE!" everyone shouts.
Sorry, I couldn't think of and ending. Anyway, Happy Easter everyone! -cp4ever