Title: Don't Speak
Author: DeityOfDeath
Archive: Yes please...
Pairings: Lucius/Harry
Category: Drama, romance, slash
rating: NC-17/R
Spoilers: Most likely.
Warnings: Yaoi, Lemon, Rape, Non-con, Mpreg SPOILERS!
Disclaimers: I never have nor will I ever own Harry Potter or its chars. They are property of JK Rowling and major companies.

Note from Author: Thank You for reading and supporting fan fiction! Enjoy and please review!

SPOILERS AHEAD! You have been warned!

Don't Speak

Chapter 10: Don't tell me 'cause it hurts

"How's Harry," asked Ron, Molly and a few others.

"Sore and weak but alive and neither of us can ask for more than that."

"Well are you going to hog him all to yourself or pass him around," asked Molly with many nods of agreement.

He handed Imriel to her and watched as she and others gently passed him around in awe and reverie. He had no idea what tomorrow brought but he didn't care. He had today and so did his family.

I sat up and looked around me at the many balloons flashing greetings, cards, piles of candies and treats and un-opened letters on the tables and any other clear surface in the curtained off area. I saw the empty bassinette that sat beside my bed and heard the silence outside of my curtained off bed and put two and two together. I slowly slid the blankets and sheets off my body and then slowly slid my legs over the edge of the bed, wincing and gasping as I did so. I was still sore which told me I hadn't been out long. If I had to estimate I would say only a day or two at the most.

I pushed myself into a standing position and then waited for my body to adjust as I stood there gripping the railing to my hospital bed. Prickles and tickles crawled through my feet and up my legs slowly as the blood flow began to once again pump at its normal rate, returning the feeling of my lower limbs to what it had been before laying hours in the same position.

Once feeling had returned I looked down at my body and saw that I was clad in a clean white medical gown and where there had been a large rounded bump there was now only a small rounded bump as a reminder. I ran my hand over my somewhat pudgy tummy.

"A bit of exercise and that will be gone as well."

I turned quickly to look behind me and hissed in pain at the sudden stab of pain in my lower regions.

"Hop right back in that bed, Harry! I'm glad I decided to come early to give you your potions. Any later and I'm betting you would have been down in the Great Hall around all the hustle and bustle, which is not good for you in the state your still in. I can see you pushing yourself until you're once again abed. And who do you think would be at fault? Not me that's for certain! If you were a bit more patient you would heal faster."

She ranted as she walked out and in of the curtained off area that was mine for the time being and returned holding a cup filled with thick greenish brown substance.

"Drink up! It'll help with the pain."

The cup was in my hand before I could protest and as I poured it down my throat and swallowed the thick mint tasting liquid Poppy pulled out another cup and filled it with a clear red potion that was as thin as water and traded my empty cup for the now full one.

"It isn't poison, although at time I know they taste it," she said walking away.

I smiled and downed the red liquid and fought the urge to vomit it back up. It tasted like copper and cherry, a horrible combination. Blood and cherries that was a better description.

"Yes, that one tastes like awful but not as bad as this one so buck up and take a sip of pumpkin juice before this one," she said as she handed me a bottle of cold pumpkin juice and began to pour another measured amount of potion into the glass she had taken from my hand.

I watched as the fuchsia potion with the consistency of clam chowder was poured into the glass and then held out to me. I swallowed a bit more of the pumpkin juice and set the bottle aside, knowing that I would need what was left to rid my tongue and mouth of the thick potion.

"It's foul but it helps. The second one was a..."

"Blood replenishing potion," I ground out as I had finished swallowing the thick nastiness that was my last potion for the time being.

"Very good! Now what was the one you've just swallowed?"

I lifted the pumpkin juice to my mouth and swallowed heartily in the hopes that the taste and memory would leave my mouth and mind forever. Upon finishing the bottle I realized it hadn't but having the pumpkin juice had helped some.

"I believe it was a mix of some sort of healing potion and a few vitamin potions as well. Though it tasted a lot like vomit."

She laughed, "Very good Harry!"

I slowly sat back on the bed and was more than a little pleased that the pain had lessened to a dull ache.

"Since I've had my potions can I have some clothes so that I can go find my son and his father?"

She gave me a once over before sighing, "I'd prefer you stay in bed for at least another day or so but seeing that your so determined and that your friends and family have been wanting to see you I shall find you some clothes and then escort you down to the Great Hall."

I smiled and watched as she walked away.

I sat stood looking in a full length mirror assessing my current outfit with a source of amusement, disdain and a tad but annoyance. Poppy had gone to the storage room and pulled out various clothing that she kept on hand in case of emergencies and set them on my bed for me to look through. Most of the items were uniforms from various houses. I had managed to find a nice pair of black slacks a white dress shirt, a black sweater vest, a belt and unfortunately the only robe I could find was that from Slytherin. I knew that Severus and Lucius would be regal pains in the butt when they see that I'm wearing their house. I would have gone without the cloak but I was cold and I figured it had a lot to do with blood loss.

Poppy stood in the doorway waiting for me, a smile on her face when she saw me.

"My have you grown."

I smiled, "I'm 5'6 Poppy, and I haven't grown an inch."

"Sometimes growth isn't always seen on the outside," she said with a secretive smile.

I shook my head smiling and walked beside her as we left the medical ward and headed down the stairs and through the halls. We talked about my son and how she and all the others adored him. We discussed what I had missed in my two days of rest since the birth and then our conversation ended as we neared the doors to the Great Hall. I took a deep breath and walked through the doorway and as I entered the various conversations stopped and I felt all eyes on me.

"HARRY!"

I fought the urge to cover my ears and instead smiled as Hermione and Ron jumped out of their seats and ran over to me, both encasing me in a large hug. Soon I had a circle of people around me, each giving me a version of congratulations and well wishes before Poppy began to shoo them away with shouts of my condition and that I needed to take things slow and steady.

I found myself starring into a pair of bright silvery eyes that shone with various happy emotions. I watched as he stood up and walked over to me, our son in his arms and I couldn't help but sniffle upon seeing them approach me. I had thought I had lost both of them and to see them standing there, walking towards me. My eyes misted and I fought the oncoming tears.

Lucius stood in front of me and held out our son to me. I took him into my arms and pulled him snug against me and buried my nose in his soft ebony hair, inhaling his scent. He smelled of baby powder and yet under the baby powder was a smell that reminded me of the air on a stormy night when the clouds are pregnant with rain and fit to burst.

I pulled back and walked with him over to an empty seat and I sat down, placing my son in the crook of my right arm so that I could look him over. I opened his thin blue blanket and saw that he was dressed in a one piece that was a pale green and covered with little lions in various stages of sleep and play. I looked at his pudgy legs and followed them down to his tiny feet and I sat there and counted his ten tiny toes before I moved up and found his chubby arms and his small hands and I counted his ten tiny fingers. I then kissed both of his round cherubic cheeks and his smooth forehead covered here and there with his ebony bangs. I explored his tiny ears and cooed at him watching those chubby arms and legs move and a look of unsure surprise move across his face. I looked into his eyes and saw myself reflected in those gorgeous pools of pale blue.

"He's so...gorgeous," I whispered and wiped away an errant tear.

"I'd have to agree," said Severus from behind me.

I placed a kiss on Imriel's button nose causing his to give a small smile, "He's got your smile."

Lucius chuckled, "I said the same thing but Severus and Poppy insisted it was gas."

"Like I said, he has your smile."

Everyone laughed and Lucius playfully smacked my arm.

"Since no one had a chance to place bets on the birth or the sex we're all placing bets on what house he'll be in," said Fred.

"Care to wager a bet," asked George.

"Five hundred pounds on Gryffindor," I said as I smiled down at Imriel.

"I'll place five hundred pounds on Slytherin," said Lucius.

Laughter was heard as well as a few other bets being shouted at the twins who jotted down names, houses and odds.

"I've missed you," I heard Lucius' voice whisper in my ear as he came up behind me and wrapped his arms around me in a tight hug.

"And I you," I said leaning into his embrace. He brought his head around and I turned my head so that our lips in what began as a gentle kiss and grew to a passionate one. A flash went off and I we broke apart and looked at Draco who stood in front of us holding a wizards camera.

We laughed and then turned back to each other and initiated another kiss causing laughter and catcalls throughout the hall. When we broke apart we were both smiling like giddy teenagers but our soon chose that moment to fuss.

"He's probably hungry," said Lucius as he reached behind him where Ginny held out a bottle. He handed me the bottle and I took it and held it in front of Imriel's mouth. He opened his mouth like a baby bird and as soon as the nipple entered he latched on, suckling with much vigor.

I held him and watched as he drank until the bottle was empty. I handed the bottle to his father and lifted him to my shoulder and patted his back until I heard the soft burp and continued until it looked as if no more burps were going to be brought up and then laid him back in my arms so that I could wipe his face. I held him one handed while I reached for a plate which Lucius took from me and began to pile with breakfast foods. He smothered my waffles in butter and syrup and even cut them for me. I thanked him and lifted my fork and took my first taste of real food in over seven months. I moaned my pleasure as I chewed and swallowed and then reached for the next bite. Before I had realized it I had managed to eat two waffles, two scrambled eggs with mushrooms and cheese, four pieces of bacon, two hash browns, a banana, a cheese Danish and two small blueberry muffins which I downed with two cups of apple juice and a large glass of orange juice.

I leaned back in my chair and looked down at Imriel's sleeping face.

"Would you like me to take him for a while," asked Mrs. Weasley.

I shook my head no and smiled as I looked down at my son, "I think I would like one of those carriers that can be worn like a sling so that I can have Imriel with me at all times."

Mrs. Weasley smiled, "Give me tonight and I'll have one made and ready for use."

I smiled and thanked her.

I felt the tension around me intensify and I knew what had them so tense. They wanted to know what had happened and how. They wanted the story of my capture and escape.

"Is everyone here," I asked as I smiled down at my precious son.

"Well, everyone that would be and should be," said Professor McGonagall.

"Good. Have the pull up a chair and I'll tell you all what happened and what I've learned. I'm only telling it once. Ask questions but I might not answer them."

Truthfully, I was also going to leave out a lot and candy coat my story as much as possible. There are a lot of things I'd rather not remember and would rather take with me to my grave. I might tell Lucius some of it but I doubt he'll ever get the full story. I'll never write it down or confess to anyone the full horrors I have gone through and I believe its better that way.

The sound of chairs scraping and of rustling clothing filled the hall as everyone made a large circle with their chairs so that they could hear what I had to say. Once everyone was settled I closed my eyes and took a deep breath.

"Where should I start? I suppose at the beginning...but which beginning..."

"Start with the day you went missing," said Charlie.

"Well it all started when I was going to my Aunt Petunia and Uncle Vernon's house to pick up some things. I remember arguing with my Aunt and Uncle when they asked if I had decided to stay in the "freak" world. I had grabbed my things and threw them into a book bag and we had actually argued all the way to the front door and on the front lawn and I was just about to leave when I heard all these pops and next thing I know I was surrounded by Death Eaters. I remember a few ran towards my Aunt and Uncle and I just started hexing them left and right. One of them grabbed my Aunt and threatened to use the most unforgivable of the unforgivables but I told him I would come willingly if he let her go."

My son stirred and I rocked him gently, "They let her go and she looked like she was going to cry. I told her to go in the house and not to come out until it was safe. She started crying and my Uncle Vernon..."

Memory

"Be safe boy."

His face held a soft look of sympathy and worry I had never seen before.

"You too, Uncle Vernon."

End of Memory

"I don't remember much after that. A sharp pain in the back of my head and then everything went black. When I woke up I heard laughter and there was Voldemort. The first month was a blur to me. I get the days all mixed up and muddled. I remember beatings and torture sessions. They tried breaking me but nothing worked. They locked me in a small cell and fed me little and then nothing. I came out of that looking the same because it was nothing new. They moved on to other things, things that I hope none of you go through."

It was quiet and when I looked around the circle I saw all the horrified and upset faces and I felt hollow.

"A month went by, maybe more. I began to get violently ill. Every morning I threw up even if I had nothing to eat. I would pass out without reason and I was always tired. When another month passed I hadn't improved and it was kind of hard to torture someone who had started vomiting before you had even began that days torture. Voldemort called on his personal healer and we learned I was pregnant and then I had to have a lot of questions answered since no one bothered to tell me wizards could get pregnant."

"Sorry about that mate," said Ron blushing.

"It's not your fault Ron. Someone really should make a class for muggle born and raised witches and wizards. Speaking of which...Why haven't I ever seen a pregnant wizard?"

"Even though homosexuality is accepted in the wizarding world not many witches and wizards are vocal about it and very few actually bond let alone decide to have children," said Remus from his spot next to Sirius.

"Besides...it bloody hurts!"

I stared at my Godfather as well as a few others.

"Don't look at me like that! I bottomed once and a month later I'm expecting. It completely blew me away."

"Then where's your child," I asked softly.

"I miscarried in Azkaban. I was a little over five months."

"I'm sorry," I whispered.

I felt the tears fall from my eyes as I looked down at my son and imagined if I had lost him that night.

"No need to cry, Harry. Besides I couldn't have kept my child anyway. Imagine me with a child and on the run from Dementors. Even if I had been able to give her to Remus, he would have had a hard time caring for her with all the bullshit that he had to go through."

"And you two can always try for another. Your still young," said Mrs. Weasley.

"Who says we haven't," asked Sirius with a grin.

"Okay...let's end this before we have another drapes conversation. Please continue Harry," said Tonks with a shudder.

I looked at Lucius and mouthed "Drapes?" He chuckled and mouthed back, "later". I shrugged and continued.

"So the torture stopped and I was almost ecstatic but then they began to threaten the life of my child. Voldemort would bring me out to show off my swollen belly and proclaim that he had me and my child in his clutches. He then began to talk of using my child for his evil and others began to put the idea into his head that it would be pure brilliance to make my child his heir. In his mind it was a possibility. He and others among them could have been probable fathers but I knew none of them were. I had begun to dig into the dirt floor of the cell they had me in and I that spot I hid a few items that came of use that I just happened upon. I also began to realize that my pregnancy caused my magic to grow and with its growth it needed an outlet and without my wand I had no outlet for it. So odd things would happen. Food would disappear from a tray in front of Voldemort and appear in my cell, I would think about causing a guard harm and he would trip and fall. So began to practice and by practice I tried to intentionally do these things with a thought or a swish of my wrist. By time I had reached my seventh month I was able to do wandless magic."

"That's our Harry," said Fred and George together.

"I waited for a day when Voldemort took a trip and then I put my plan into action. I stunned and tied up as many as I could and took away their wands. I searched high and low for my own wand and find no sign of it so I was forced to leave without it. I had made it out of his hideout and ran and ran until a day and a half had gone by. I hid in alleys with the homeless and stole clothes off of lines and food from gardens, window sills and orchards. I did this until I happened upon a small cottage. I wouldn't have approached but I saw the young woman in the yard was wearing a pale rose colored cloak. I had never seen a muggle wear something so beautiful and unusual and then she took out a wand and began to spell the laundry from the line into a folded pile in her basket. I approached her. She saw me and almost ran but I begged her to contact Hogwarts or The Weasleys. She suggested they contact the Ministry."

"Which at the time you declined," said Bill.

"Assuming that someone else and not Dad was in charge," said Ginny.

"Yes. So I was flooed to Hogwarts and landed right into Severus' arms. The rest you already know."

"So why does Voldemort want Imriel," asked Tonks and shacklebolt at the same time.

"If you had to face your enemy and they've brainwashed your child, could you kill your own child in order to obtain victory," asked Lucius.

I shuddered and looked down at Imriel, "I would rather die than kill Imriel and Voldemort knows that. He also knows that my child is powerful. Two strong bloodlines have now become one and unlike most pureblood families there's no interbreeding and there is a new strain of DNA added to keep out most of the genetic problems pureblood's face."

"Squibs," said Hermione.

"Yes. That's another reason. Voldemort is not pureblood but he goes around preaching about the pure blooded but in truth he needs new blood. He wants to conquer not destroy. He thinks he can build a better wizarding race."

"We have a war on our hands and there's no stopping it," said Kingsley.

"We have the key to his defeat and he knows it," I said pulling Imriel in a hug.

Everyone gave me a questioning look and I just rubbed my sons back.

"So what's this drape stuff all about," I asked.

"Upon seeing your Godfathers new look I decided to tease him a bit and asked if the carpet matched the drapes," said Lucius with a dramatic sigh.

I looked at my Godfather and then "looked" at my Godfather.

"Do they," I asked out of curiosity.

Sirius stood up and just as his hands reached for his belt buckle everyone shouted, "YES!"

I looked around me at the many terrified, red and amused faces and busted out laughing.

I'm betting this wasn't the first time Sirius had tried dropping his pants in a crowded room.

To be continued...

So does that answer your questions?

It's been a little over a month and my laptop died. I kid you not! So I had to go to this horrible place that rhymes with "Pest Fly" and I had to deal with a lot of BS before I got another laptop. Same model and make. :HUGS CHIBI G:

Yuppers. So this is updated and I really should work on my Gundam Wing fic, Lion and the Lamb.

Bye for now

Kat