Pokemon Parody


AN I made this because pokemon annoyed me. It wasnt real enough. Please note, however, this is NOT just sex and stuff, the real pokemon stuff will be in it, like Badges and Team Rocket. But also, there will be a few twists.

Disclaimer - I do not own Pokemon, but if I did, id poke it until it cried.


Chapter 1 - Journey Begins.

Ash woke up and smiled for two reasons. 1 he was getting a pokemon today, and 2 he had had an awsomely sexy dream with some real horniness all night. He had a big erection and felt like a wank. He looked at his clock.

"Shit, 10 minutes till I have to be at Oaks"

He thought he should get up, but the urge to have a wank was overpowering him, and he started.

15 minutes later he was breathing deeply and was approaching climax. Suddenly his door opened and his mom walked in.

"Ash honey! You need to go to Proffessor Oaks!" she said.

"Mom!" Ash gasped, releasing his penis and rumpling his blanket to hide his boner. "Dont barge in on me!"

"Cmon, you have to get up. Im just outside folding your clothes." She left the door open and Ash could see her folding his underwear.

"Oh bollocks!" Ash muttered trying to will his penis to shrink. He couldnt get out of bed or his mom would see he had a boner.

It took 10 minutes for his penis to retract and he jumped out of bed and threw some clothes on, and ran out, semen still on his penis.

"Im here! Im here!" Ash panted, running into Oaks lab and falling over.

"Ash?" Oak said, suprised.

"Im here its ok, where is my pokemon?"

"Ash, youre too late, i gave them all away."

"Youre shitting me!" Ash said looking aghast.

"No im not, you should have got here early."

"Oh man!" Ash sat down, his head in his hands.

"Aw cmon Ash, dont cry."

"Im not crying!" Ash said wiping his eyes.

"Ok fine, im trying to be nice,"

"You! Nice! You fucking promised me a pokemon! Stupid fucking retard. Cant you get anything right? Senile old dildo!"

"Woah" Oak said, looking upset, "I wasnt going to give this pokemon out, but here." Oak got up and went to the counter and picked up pokeball."

"Why? Whats wrong with it?" Ash said, eying the ball, warily.

"Its still wild and you'll have to work harder to get it to obey you."

"What ever!" Ash said greedily" Give it!"

Oak tossed Ash the ball and said, "Its an electric pokemon, so be kinda carefull."

"Right!" Ash pressed the button and a Pikachu was zapped out. "Wow! what sort of rat is that -? Ow!" Ash said as the pikachu shocked him.

"Dont insult it! It will get pissed of. She is a pikachu." Oak said, fondly.

"A pikachu?" Ash bent down to examine it. "Kinda cute"

"Pika pika" said the pokemon.

"What the hell does that mean?" asked Ash

"Well, a pokemon can only say its own name!" Oak said

"Huh? What retard thought of that? What if it wants to call another pokemon?"

"Well... I dunno." Oak said looking confused.

"Whatever..." Ash turned to the Pikachu, " Ash, Ash" he said, pointing to himself. The pikachu looked confused


"Can it understand me?" Ash asked, stroking the pikachu's face."

"Well, basically yes, and be carefull. Dont touch his red cheeks"

"You dont tell me what to do!" Ash said, and touched the cheek" ARGSJDFSJ:O"

"Told you!"

"Aw shut up. You suck, me and this pikachu gonna be champions, you wait and see."

"Ok then, off you go"

As Ash left, he ran into Gary at the door who ran inside.

"Hey Gramps?" Gary yelled." Wheres my pokemon?"

"Get your own, cheap arse."

Gary left muttering under his breath, mimicing Oak, "Get your own, im a gay old fuck faced poo fart who cant get it up"

AN This is just fun, its not meant to be accurate