Hi, when I was writing my first fanfic this idea got stuck in my head. As it was finished first I'm posting it first. Please give me some feedback. This is after all my "first" fanfic. Thanking you in advance. (Ha, now you haveto review or be cursed for all eternity)
Robin strained under the burden of the rough brown sack. It wasn't the weight of the sack which plagued Robin, though it was pretty heavy. The sack was full of jewellery and bank notes. Robin had stolen from people's lifesavings and homes to satisfy the will of one villain, Slade.
Robin knew that it was necessary if he wanted his friends to live but no matter how many times he reminded himself, he still felt guilty. Without looking at Slade, Robin deposited the stolen goods by the desk, wincing at the clang the jewellery made as it came in contact with the metal surface. He slumped to the ground. He felt terrible.
What was Slade thinking about? He robbed a jewellery store, an old folks home, and a bank. Or made me rob them. What kind of twisted genius is he?
Slade grinned happily under his mask. He sat down at his desk and pulled out a pad of paper and some crayons. He then began to start doodling on the pages. In his head he began to sing.
I hurt a robin this morning,
I'm feeling happy today,
Put the city in a whistle,
And blow it all away.
What if I'd eaten Kentucky…
There he is, probably drawing his latest evil plan. Everything I do, he is one step ahead of me. How can I out think such a criminal mastermind?
Slade's desk was covered with crayon drawings of stick figure Slades riding on the back of giant bird robins. All the robins had a sack of treasure in their beaks and a black mask over their eyes.
When the red, red robin goes rob, rob, robbing along…
Who knows what goes on in the mind of criminal genius?
So what did you think? What do you think I did well (If any at all) and what should I improve on?