snape1 The Least Likely Of All : Started, May 20th, ended July 31st, 2001. 100 chapters - don't let that fool you, they're short. I just like having a nice, even number to show off. I've rewritten this chapter, so it's a lot better than it was originally. Slowly, I'll be rewriting the rest as needed. There are two endings : 33-49, 50-100.

Rated R, but that's more so towards the end. The first 59 chapters are PG to PG-13, but then it gets interesting... There are subjects touched on that should be addressed here: physical and sexual abuse, adultery (more than once with more than one partner, mind you), strong language (although I tend to dash it out), and a homosexual relationship between two men (but not until the 90's, so don't freak out just yet). The slash is absolutely nothing - just implied for the most part.

Pairings: Like hell I'm giving those away! The story does, however, revolve around Lily and her relationships... But there are many different pairings between characters you wouldn't expect to even speak to each other, let alone date or marry.

Opinions: SEEKER 2000 asked me to put her opinion up on the main page, and here it is: "This is a very screwed up story, but it will keep you turning the pages. No matter how messed up it is, it's worth the read BECAUSE it is so different and new." I agree with her, it IS a screwed up story, but not in the way of writing... There are a lot of plot twists, and even though I tried to give it a fairly decent plot, it ended up becoming a soap opera. Opps? This is 100% flipped from most stories. I realize the male main characters are fairly OOC, but we really don't know what Lily, Severus, and James were like when they were younger. People tend to forget the bad about their dead loved ones, and only mention the good. Just keep that in mind when you read this... Anyway, onto the story.



Lily Evans and James Potter, voted best couple of 1976 by all four houses. James Potter, Sirius Black, Remus Lupin, and Peter Pettigrew, voted most popular group by three of the four Hogwarts houses. Lily Evans, voted prettiest 6th Year by all four of the houses. Sirius Black, voted most eligible bachelor of the Gryffindor house. Remus Lupin, voted most likely to become the next Minister of Magic. Severus Snape, voted most likely to become a Death Eater.

To Severus, the thought was ridiculous, but to the rest of the school, it was inevitable. He showed all the traits; He was a first-class Slytherin, knew more hexes than the rest of the student body combined, and even slightly resembled what Lord Voldemort was rumored to have once looked like. With his long black hair and cold black eyes, he looked more menacing than any teacher ever did, even while threatening expulsion.

However evil he looked, however much vice he was believed to take part of, however much chaos he seemed to have caused, he hated it. Not so much the fact his classmates seemed to ignore him, but the fact he had inherited the reputation to begin with. His father before him – a bastard in Severus' eyes – had done more than his share of wrongdoing within the walls of Hogwarts.

He was constantly teased for his looks and heritage, something he eventually learned to ignore. It was his belief the school would have left him alone if it hadn't been for two boys; James Potter and Sirius Black. Ringleaders of a gang they had dubbed the Marauders, since day one they had tortured Severus. He didn't know what he had done to deserve their wrath, or if they simply thought it was great fun to torment people they thought lower than themselves. Either way, by their sixth year, after an incident where Sirius and James had nearly killed Severus, he had spent most of his time looking for things to get them back with – he was bent on paying them back dearly, not only for their pranks but for their utter inability to be human.

He silently vowed to prove them all wrong, to show them that the five most popular people in the school were, in fact, only human. Severus hated school; the entire 6 years he had attended Hogwarts had been a joke. Top of his class, yes, but always right below James Potter. As much as he hated to admit it, he was jealous of James. Severus dreamed of having even a portion of James' popularity, a percentage of the respect James was given. He had everything, everything down to the girl.

Lily Evans had never acknowledged his existence, as far as Severus was concerned. Of course, every once in a while a disgusted look or nasty comment was thrown his way, but he doubted she even knew his first name. She did, however, know his last; all she ever referred to him as was 'Snape'.

James Potter and Lily Evans. They were the seemingly perfect couple to everyone accept the precious few who truly knew what went on. They were the most popular couple in Hogwarts, no one dared to question their relationship, convinced it would last forever.

On one snow-filled evening in the middle of their sixth year, the four friends were gathered around the Gryffindor common room fire, swapping stories and pranks they had managed to pull off recently. Lily had come walking down the stairs from her dormitory, clothed in robes of rich green velvet she had recently bought at a store in Hogsmeade. Catching Remus' eye, she smiled as he winked, nodding his head slightly in his approval. Before she could take another step towards the four, James whirled around and gaped at her slightly, before smirking and shaking his head.

"Green isn't your colour, Lily." James snapped at her, once again smirking. "You look like a trashy whore. Go put on some decent clothes."

"I'm sorry." She sighed, glancing away from James and looking directly at Remus as she made her way back up the stairs.

"You know, this would have been the perfect opportunity to compliment her." Remus commented, sighing inwardly at James' harsh words towards Lily.

"Why though? Whenever you compliment a girl they get all giddy and never leave you alone." James shuddered as he started to read from Quidditch Through The Ages.

"Five words my friend, five words." Sirius grinned, holding up a splayed hand showing four fingers and a thumb.

"And which five words are those? 'I want you like candy'?" Peter Pettigrew smirked, adjusting his robes slightly so his potbelly was completely concealed.

"No, stupid. 'To get in her pants'." Sirius grinned, punching James' shoulder.

"Damn… Good point." James scowled slightly just as Lily came back down.

"Sorry James." She apologized once more as she sat down next to him.

"It's ok, baby… I'm sorry I was so harsh, you looked really good in those and I just didn't want to other guys seeing you like that." James nuzzled her neck and wrapped his arm around her shoulders as Sirius winked at him.

"Oh, ok… Want to go upstairs and see it then? I really like it." Lily suggested, pointing up the wooden staircase that led to her dormitory.

"Sure, let's go." James took Lily's hand and led her upstairs, briefly glancing back at his three friends, two of whom were trying desperately not to laugh.

"Score one for Potter." Sirius high-fived Peter as Remus just glanced up towards the staircase James and Lily had disappeared up, sighing once more to himself.

The next morning, Lily and James were late to breakfast, not to their friends' surprise. Severus, however, was disgusted at the scene unfolding in front of him, along with the rest of the Great Hall; James had wrapped his left arm around her shoulders once more, chaining her to his side. Even from a distance Severus could see the dark circles under her eyes and he could have sworn he saw her flinch as James brought his hand down to rub her upper arm in what looked like a comforting gesture.

The Gryffindors and the Slytherins had Transfiguration together as the first class of the day, and Severus made it his first priority to find out what had happened.

Throughout the class, Severus had tried to catch Lily's eye, but it was only towards the end of the hour that he was successful. He signaled to her the best he could to wait up for him, and after class, he ran to catch up to Lily, who was now waiting patiently. Severus was thankful that, for once, she wasn't surrounded by her usual group of friends.

"What do you want, Snape?" she asked quietly, her eyes darting around as if she was afraid to be caught talking to a future Death Eater.

"I just wanted to know if you were ok." Severus admitted. "You look tired and that bruise on your arm is probably turning a nasty shape of purple."

"How do you know…?" Lily looked at him with questioning eyes, her right hand touching her upper left arm.

"Observation." Severus shrugged, his eyes focused on a spot on the wall some five feet behind her.

"Well… Thank you for asking, and yes, I'm ok. I'll live, anyway." Lily glanced behind her to see Remus coming.

"Listen, if you ever want to talk… I know we're different and everything, but I can listen if you need someone." Severus said quietly, eyeing the approaching Remus suspiciously.

"Thanks for the offer, Snape, maybe someday… I have to go though, I'll see you later." Lily departed as Remus stepped up to the two of them, and with a curious glance in Severus' direction, he quickly ran after her.

"Lily! Wait up!" Remus called, finally catching up with Lily's long strides. "Why were you talking to that piece of Slytherin scum? He's really not stable enough for a girl of your structure to be conversing with." Remus murmured, touching Lily's shoulder.

Lily flinched and shrugged Remus' hand off. He sighed, "You really can't let James do that."

She shook her head, holding back tears of frustration, "Well, what else am I supposed to do? Stand up to him? I'm sure that'll help… Make him stop right then, that will."

"I can try to talk to him if you'd like." Remus suggested, ignoring her sarcasm. "I'm his friend, he should listen to me."

"Remus, thanks, but I'm his girlfriend… He claims he loves me, so why shouldn't he listen to me? Besides, if he even thinks I told you anything, I won't be able to move for a week." Lily sighed, "He's really a good man, he just doesn't know how to handle his anger. I'm the closest thing to him most of the time; therefore I usually end up being the target. It's not his fault, I really shouldn't make him so mad."

Remus shook his head, "If that's what you want to believe, then believe it. I can't do anything, but talking to Snape sure as hell isn't going to help the situation."

Lily sighed, "He seems… nice. It's not his fault he's like that, I guess."

Remus grinned, "Lily, with you, nothing is ever anyone's fault."

Lily smiled back, "One day that'll change… eventually."