Disclaimer: OK I do not own Gundam Wing if you think I do you must be some raving maniac who doesn't have any sense of reality at all. Come on people I already am exiled from seeing the sandwich as the sandwich, give me a break. OK on to the story.

The Journal
By, Goddess Shinigami

Out of all the memories I have of the war my most memorable one is of him. Is that all he is? I'm still with him so there's more to it than a memory. We met at the beginning of a poetic verse, but our poem has had many an unhappy sonnet.
Deep in the crevices of my soul I know how much I've hurt him. I know I can't ever take back all the times I turned him away or choose my laptop over listening to what he had to say. I look back and it kills me to remember doing all those things. I know I have him now. I'll never let him go and I know he won't ever let me leave him again.
Why he could want me still after all he went through just to get me out of my shell. I wish I could apologize enough for all of it, but there's no way. I want to cry over it all. Let my emotions wreak havoc on all of me, but to cry would say that the soldier in me was gone. That I was just Heero Yuy. There would be no more cold, emotionless me and even after four years of war and almost three years of peace I don't know if I can live without it.
I watch him now, out of the corner of my eye. He knows I'm very secretive about my journal. I write as if my life story will actually be important. When I know the only one who will cherish it is him.
Heero closed the leather bound book setting it back in its place on the bookshelf. " Duo, I love you." He stated sitting next to his koi on the loveseat in the library. "I know." Duo said snuggling up to his favorite teddy bear. "Duo," Heero started quietly. "Yes." Duo replied dazedly snuggling closer to the warmth next to him. "What if . . . What if I . . . " Heero stopped. "What if what Heero?" Duo asked lifting his head from Heero's green tank top clad chest. "Nevermind, Duo. Nevermind." Heero said quietly picking Duo up and carrying him up to their room.
As Heero laid Duo in the bed, Duo pulled him down into a long kiss. When the kiss had broken Duo spoke. "Don't worry, Heero. I'll love you no matter what. I love you more than anything and I know your struggling with a lot of things lately. Remember I can always help. I only have an understanding of a few emotions, but we can work it out together. I won't ever leave you, no matter what. From the sniffles to death, I will never leave your side." Duo finished kissing Heero on the forehead.
Heero stood and plopped down into a chair behind him. "I don't know what to say, Duo." Heero whispered softly watching Duo get out of bed and walk over to the chair. "Then don't say anything." Duo said sitting in Heero's lap. He wrapped his arms around Heero's neck and Heero wrapped his arms around Duo's waist.
They just stared intently into each other's eyes drowning in their thoughts. All of a sudden a single tear fell from Heero's eye. Duo didn't blink, but reached a hand up to wipe it away. He knew Heero would never be the same again. So did Heero, but still neither of them said a word. They fell asleep in that chair, and since then there has only been one entry in Heero's journal. It read:
I don't need to worry anymore. I have Duo and He will carry one my story. So this record is needed no more. Owari, Heero.
He and Duo read the journal together, laughing at the good memories and crying with the sad. The journal was kept and cherished for all the years they could manage to keep it from falling apart. When it did finally fall apart they stored it away for the next rainy day.


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