Preface

They didn't have much. They didn't have feelings, that was a given. It couldn't really be argued with. There was impatience, distrust, disinterest, but those were personality traits that bled through from former lives that they couldn't even remember.

Their world didn't have much. It was theirs, but it wasn't made for comfort. There was darkness and rain and inside the castle there was sterile cold and white. Xemnas had made it that way for a reason. The only beautiful thing in the whole world was supposed to have been their Kingdom Hearts.

But it drove them crazy. All of them stared at that moon. Xaldin would spend days up on the roof without eating or sleeping. Larxene often flew into rages, locked in her room, thrashing and screaming, only to immerge singed, bleeding, her eyes dancing with fevered glee.

Without their hearts, their bodies were prisons. Living things that they could make no use of until their plans were set into motion. They craved movement and action. Driven stir crazy, Marluxia and Xigbar could battle for days on end, nearly killing each other. Then they would lie on the floor laughing. Luxord always watched them, just in case they finally succeeded in a fatality. Anyone who passed by the practice room could take a bet with him.

Their Kingdom Hearts…she glowed in the sky above them, becoming fuller and fuller with every creature the keyblade slaughtered. Vexen could not stand the sight of their incomplete salvation and hid himself away in the confines of his laboratory, working his mind to its limits, instead of his body.

No one knew what Xemnas did with his time. He called them together every few months, laid out a great feast on the rooftop where he toasted their resplendent Kingdom Hearts and shared status reports. Other than that he kept his own council.

Saïx was an unholy terror upon the castle's inhabitants. Like Xaldin, he could spend days soaking in the moon's rays. It drove him crazier than most. His body would become invigorated and his mind agitated and there was nothing that could stop him. No amount of labors could halt his rampage.

Sometimes he was left unchecked, and his consorts simply stayed out of his way. Sometimes Xemnas would come down from his lofty seclusion and calm the man himself. Other times available members of the Organization would gang up on him, taking him down like a rabid animal. More than likely, they threw him a sacrificial lamb.

Whoever was unlucky enough to be selected would return from Saïx's chambers hours later. Raped, beaten, bloodied, bruised. Luxord often rigged the lottery to choose Demyx. The musician quickly learned Saïx's patterns and was not typically around for his rampages.

When he was trapped in the castle at the inopportune time, however, he soon found protection with Roxas and, by extension, Axel. There was an almost friendship between the three, that the others found disgusting. Larxene especially, who was used to having Axel as her own, but he abandoned her for a better prize.

"Well, bitch," Axel would smile at her. "He makes me feel like I have a heart already."

"Are you saying you love him?" She would snarl and attack him and they would fight and he would always win, but he wouldn't walk away unscathed.

And Larxene was sure that it was Roxas he limped to. And she was sure it was Roxas who healed his wounds. And she was sure it was Roxas he would then spend the rest of the night with. Whining and milking it for all the fucking sympathy he could get.

She hated Roxas. She hated everyone who approved of Roxas. She hated everyone close to Roxas. She abused Demyx mercilessly until Roxas finally ran her through on his blasted keyblade. She only survived because Xemnas saved her. No one else would have lifted a finger. She nursed her pride and her hate. Every time she saw them together she burned.

No one questioned the relationship. Roxas and Axel was a pair: two names that couldn't be said or thought of without the other. Roxas and Axel. Like Lexaeus and Zexion. Inseparable in the mind and probably fucking while they were at it.

Roxas often reflected that, for creatures with supposedly no emotions, Nobodies could have an amazing amount of feelings.

Day 1

Xaldin was on the roof again and no one really wanted to disturb him. Vexen was squirreled away in his laboratory, working on some experiment, each were a little bit more terrifying than the last. Saïx was silent within his sanctuary. For the time being. Luxord was engaged in a game of chance with Marluxia, Larxene, and Xigbar. Lexaeus and Zexion were somewhere, probably scheming as they were wont to do.

Xemnas was, in fact, off world and the three youngest members of the Organization were sitting atop the Skyscraper of Memory.

Demyx strummed his sitar thoughtfully, dangling his legs over the ledge.

"So, you're both being sent on missions," he mumbled.

Roxas gave a tired sigh. "Yes, Demyx. Xemnas sent word that he wants us in Wonderland."

"But it's the third day of the fourth cycle!" Demyx protested weakly.

"So?" Axel wondered, turning his head and curling his lip.

"So? Well, I happen to know, from several years of experience, that the moon will be at her absolute pinnacle tomorrow and I, for one, am scared shitless because they always make sure I'm the one who…"

"Tell them I'll kill them if they do," Roxas shrugged. Axel snickered and punched the blonde's shoulder.

"But you won't be here to make good," the artisan pointed out.

"Quit your whining, Demyx!" Axel laughed. He flopped backwards onto the tarpaper and stared up at the engorged moon.

"Shit, Axel, you don't know what it's like," the musician protested. Roxas let out another exasperated sigh.

"I can't do anything else right now. I'll come back as soon as possible."

Axel crowed indignantly. "You baby him."

"Try hiding out in Twilight Town for the day," Roxas added, shooting Axel an annoyed glare.

Day 2

Axel remained behind in Wonderland. It had turned out the job didn't really require them both and Roxas wanted to get back to Demyx as quickly as possible.

He carelessly opened a portal and stepped through. He immerged at the castle's gates and hurried up. Several members were standing around in the front hall talking. He only needed to see Larxene's face before he knew what they'd done. He threw back his hood and stormed up to them. He was an angry, black, thundercloud, even though he did not command the lightning.

"Hello, Roxas," the woman purred. She hung off of Marluxia's arm with a terrible grin. "You missed the show. Saïx simply demanded he be allowed to see dear little Demyx!"

The keyblades appeared in the blonde boy's hands. He twirled them as he menaced her. Xigbar and Luxord both sniggered as Marluxia shoved her away. She was left to face Roxas down alone. He was small, but his keyblades were terrifying. She had been on the wrong end of them once before.

Roxas' face was dark and furious. "Listen, you petty, sadistic bitch. All of you!" He whirled around to stare at the others. Xigbar seemed angry to be threatened, but made no move. Roxas turned back to Larxene and raised one of his blades. "Leave Demyx alone or I will kill you."

"Yes," Larxene hissed. Her eyes narrowed. Her black boots scuffed over the tiles. "He mentioned something like that."

"I doubt Xemnas will save you a second time, Larxene," Roxas growled. The two began to circle each other like animals. "You aren't worth that much effort!"

Larxene lunged at him, lightning flashing and knives flying. Roxas knocked the weapons away with ease but took the full force of her magic. The room filled the scent of burnt hair and he stood in front of her, smoking slightly.

"Who isn't worth that much effort?" she taunted. Roxas made to attack but she leapt backwards nimbly.

"So, 2:1 in Roxas' favor?" Luxord said, his grin bleeding into his voice. Larxene glanced his direction and shouted.

"Fuck you!"

Roxas took that instant to renew his attack. She raised her arms to block the assault, but was still forced back several feet by the onslaught.

Their fight encompassed the entire room. Roxas' blades clanked and Larxene's lightning flashed. The woman let out an exclamation of triumph when she knocked one of his keyblades away. He punched her in the face, sending her stumbling back. Then he hit her in the stomach with the broadside of the key. She toppled to the ground with a whoosh of air. He put his boot on her head, applying steady pressure as she squirmed and summoned bolt, after bolt, of lightning. He was unmoved.

"Leave. Demyx. The. Fuck. Alone!" Roxas repeated with an angry snarl. "This is still about Axel, isn't it? You want him back that badly? Well have him. Just leave Demyx alone!"

"I think I can speak for myself," Axel spoke up from the doorway. He was watching the whole scene with a curious look on his face.

Roxas stared at him surprise, but his expression hardened over again quickly. He pressed down on Larxene's head once more before releasing her and rushing to wait outside Saïx's room.

When Demyx was literally thrown out by Saïx, Roxas was there to catch him and carry him off to his room. There he healed the injured musician and was then unable to leave, the blonde clung to him like a frightened cat.

"Roxas…Roxas…You're back? Oh…shit…Roxas…Roxas…"

Roxas held him, and rocked back and forth and kissed his hair and tried not to think about the look on Axel's face.

Day 9

Larxene was pleased to see that Roxas and Axel were not on speaking terms any longer. Fighting terms, yes. Yelling terms, doubly so. She all but pranced through the halls and when she passed Demyx, who looked dutifully gloomy, she grabbed his arm and swung him around once. Grinning.

"How is Roxas doing?" she said with her lilting smile. "The poor dear, it seems he and Axel are fighting?"

Demyx grimaced. "He's fine. Yeah, they're fighting. See you later, Larxene." And he ran, like a coward.

Day 10

Axel was back in her arms. She'd missed her playmate. His pain threshold was so very high. She concluded, as he ran her knife down his pale back, that she now understood why Zexion schemed all the time. Maybe she would try it sometime. If the rewards were like this …it could be quite satisfying.

Day 11

Demyx felt terrible. By now he'd heard the story a thousand times over, from everyone but Roxas and Axel themselves, of course. He walked to halls, working his brain, unable to think of any way to fix the growing rift that he had caused. He even went so far as to find Zexion, but the schemer had given him an annoyed look and Lexaeus had thrown him out.

So, now sat in the library hunched over every book he could find, until someone else such as Vexen or Marluxia appeared. Then he fled back to his room. His sitar lay woefully abandoned, as he didn't have the heart to play it. True, everyone left him alone for the most part, but that 'everyone' included Roxas and Axel. And that hurt him; they were his friends.

He didn't care if Nobodies didn't have feelings. He missed his friends, end of story. He left his quarters and went to the portal that led into Roxas'. He found the other blonde lying on his bed, apparently asleep. Demyx considered the merits of waking him up as opposed to leaving, and then sat on the edge of the bed.

Roxas stirred almost immediately, leading Demyx to believe he hadn't really been asleep at all.

"What is it?" the keyblade's chosen wondered.

"Roxas, I'm sorry," the musician replied. He leaned in close to the other's face. "I'm sorry that I messed things up with you and Axel."

That got Roxas' attention, he sat up slowly, stretching. "No, it isn't your fault."

"But it is," Demyx disputed, hanging his head in shame. "If you hadn't had to save me it would have been different."

Roxas' caught his pointed chin in his gloved hand and titled his head up, so their eyes met. "Yes, it would have been different, but you didn't do anything, do you understand me?"

Roxas was an amazing not-person. Demyx mused as he gazed into the endless depths of his eyes. Usually he was quiet and detached, but if you struck the right cord his true nature came out. It was beautiful and intense. The kind of melody that was perfect for a dance.

Without thinking any further, Demyx leaned in, pressing their lips together. At first, Roxas' mouth remained a hard unmoving line and Demyx feared he'd made yet another critical error, but then the blonde responded, wrapping his arms around him and pulling him in. Roxas' leaned backwards until the musician lay over him entirely.

"Roxas…I," Demyx panted, unsure but excited by this new development, "really am sorry."

"Shut up," the blonde replied gruffly, bringing him back into the kiss.


Disclaimer: I do not own Kingdom Hearts.