Disclaimer: This gets really old, really fast.
This can be read after Men Don't Cry... It might make a little more sense that way. If you're too lazy to do that, the story can be read on its own. Enjoy…but it's mushy. Don't say I didn't warn you!
Revan sighed as she heard the familiar creak of the bed as she sat on it, wondering again why Carth had been too stubborn to buy a new matress. She pushed aside the sheets and pulled them onto her lap, looking over at where the man she loved was fast asleep. Ever since the Star Forge, she had considered her destiny to be only partially gone; just the half of a circle. She had imagined that if she defeated the Sith threat, the circle would be completed. And yet, she still felt only half filled, like the other half of her circle of destiny had yet to be fufilled. And she had a sneaking suspicion that coming full circle had something to do with this man.
"Hey, Gorgeous," Carth mumbled as he rolled over, awakened by Revan's presence. Of course, he knew that Revan wasn't really here, not physically anyway. Approximately two months before, she began coming to him in his dreams every night, although they couldn't technically be considered dreams. No matter, Revan was here for now, and he wouldn't allow his mind to dwell upon anything else.
Revan laughed lightly, and gently brushed a strand of graying hair from his forhead. "I've missed you," she murmured softly as she bent and kissed his forehead. There was infinite tenderness in her touch, a tenderness that Carth had never been more aware of.
"Will you be coming home any time soon?" he asked, propping himself up on one elbow as he looked over at her. She's only a vision, Carth…she's only a vision. He thought, trying to remind himself for the hundredth time that this being sitting before him was not really the woman that he loved. She was an immitation; a specter of the Force.
"That depends. Am I still Revan?" She asked, drawing her knees to her chest as she toyed with her hair, something she often did when she was nervous or insecure. Her expression was veiled, and she looked down at her lap, suddenly wishing that she hadn't asked that fateful question.
Carth groaned, and ran a hand through his unkempt hair. "Why do you always ask me that? Does it really matter?" he asked, willing her to look at him. She didn't.
Revan twirled a lock of hair around her finger, and toyed with the blankets with her other hand. She let out a deep sigh, and turned her head towards him, but her gaze still avoided meeting his. "I am no longer Revan. OUr personalities are very similar, but she isn't me. I'm Aminta now," she said softly, swallowing past the lump in her throat. She had wanted things to be so much better…so much easier…
"You became Revan when you left me, and you will stay Revan until you come back," he told her, but his voice didn't hold anger or rubuke. His eyes were gentle as he looked down on her, and he could feel her hurt. The fact that he had caused that pain pulled at his heartstrings. But she was the first to inflict sorrow. She was the one who left.
Revan bit her lip, and let out the breath that she had been holding. His answer was always the same, but each time that she visited him, she had longed to hear a different answer, to know that he had a change of heart. "I'm sorry," she said simply, and her apology had a double meaning. She was honestly and sincerely sorry that she had hurt him, and she was also sorry that he could not find it in himself to completely forgive the hurt that she had caused. She hung her head, but before Carth could say anything further, she looked up at him with a smile fixed on her face. Carth hated when she did that, hiding her emotions behind a mask. He had always loathed the facade that she slid in place, and he supposed that he always would.
"So, how was your day?" Revan asked in a falsely bright tone, and Carth couldn't help but think of how much she sounded like a wife. Her fathomless blue eyes no longer held any hint of emotion beside what she wanted displayed there. That bothered Carth almost as much as her ability to throw up a mask did.
Carth shook his head. "You honestly think that I want to talk about how my day went with you?" he asked with a slight chuckle, trying for the levity that she had attempted to establish. "When I only have an hour to talk with the woman that I love, why would I want to talk about something so unimportant?"
Revan smiled slightly. "Because its the easiest thing to talk about, besides the weather. Which we could change the subject to if you want to."
Carth shook his head. "No thanks, there's other things that I want to talk about. You never answered my question. When are you planning on coming home?"
Revan blinked, and then grinned, finally deciding to answer his previous question. "Very, very soon."
Carth stared at her. "Are you that close to defeating the Sith threat?" he asked, his throat gone dry. If Revan was coming home… the implications of that thought made his mind whirl and all of his thoughts jumble together. Five years, five years! After so long, she'll finally be home, he thought through his fog.
Revan's grin grew a bit wider. "They have already been defeated," she told him, her enthusiasm apparent. She watched as emotions played like a holofilm across Carth's face. If his thoughts hadn't been muddled and out of focus a moment before, they definately were now. At the moment, Carth would have been unable to identify himself if asked who he was.
"They've already been…" he began, repeating her setence, but then he trailed off. He blinked several times before clearing his throat. "Are you on your way?" he asked, finally able to follow one decipherable train of thought. Breathe, Onasi. Breathe!
Revan's grin grew so that her whole face was lit up by the radiance of it. "I'm closer than that," she told him, her eyes beginning to shimmer from moisture.
"You're home?" Carth choked out, hope flooding his being. He could barely catch his breath, and had to remind himself to allow oxygen into his lungs so that he wouldn't collapse.
Revan drew close to him, wiping a tear from her cheeks as she did so. "Not yet…" she began, and Carth felt his heart plummet. But she's coming home soon. You've waited five years, Onasi. You can wait a few more months, he thought, reprimanding himself.
"Home is where the heart is, and my heart is right here," she said as she wrapped her arms around him. "Now I'm home," she whispered in his ear, as she felt his tears mingle with the moisture already present on her cheeks.
And when her arms twined about him, the circle of her destiny was complete.
Another romance…But this one wasn't my fault, I swear! Falnangl9124 (thanks for all of your great support by the way) requested that I do a snipet of Carth and Revan uniting…so…here it is! I know it was utterly mushy and all too predictable, but it was done in a grand total of twenty minutes. Shrugs As always, I appreciate all posts and any comments that you care to leave me. Thanks for reading!