By Tiger 5/8/06
SUMMARY: All the men that Padmé ever loved were unfaithful, Obi-wan vows to remain forever faithful to her memory. Vignette set towards the end of ROTS. Obidala
DISCLAIMER: Star Wars and its settings and characters belong to George Lucas and Lucasfilm. I am a poor college student, please don't sue!
Padmé! His mind cried out to her. He could do nothing as he felt her slip away from the universe. As her children cried stronger and stronger, her breathing became weaker and weaker.
Oh he hated Anakin as he never hated Anakin before. Obi-wan couldn't hate Anakin for loving Padmé, after all, who couldn't help but feel attraction for such a warm and intelligent young woman? He couldn't even fault Anakin for marrying such a woman. Really, they were quite well suited to each other. He could he, Obi-wan Kenobi deny her any sort of happiness?
Leaning down at her still form, his heart nearly stopped as hears did. She was gone…
Gone because Anakin couldn't control himself! Gone because Anakin had no patience! Gone because she dared to try and reason with her wayward husband on Mustafar, gone because he killed her! Gone!
Obi-wan silently cried tears of grief and held the cold hand to his heart. He wondered how she could just die while she knew her children still lived. He wondered how she could leave him, now, when they perhaps needed each other the most.
But he knew that it was his fault that they were like this now, his fault that she had died. If only, five years ago, he was not so rigid, if only, five years ago, he had not begun to change. If only he had said yes to his heart, to her kiss. If only…
She had understood then, that he was Jedi Knight Kenobi, untouchable, unable to love because the rules prevented him from doing so. She understood the pain and longing she saw in his eyes when they parted from each other not as the lovers they had dreamed of, but only as good friends, the closest they could go before reaching the point of no return.
He could not blame her for turning to Anakin. She knew that Anakin loved her, as misguided and obsessive the love was. He knew that Padmé saw a small portion of a younger Obi-wan in a fiery Anakin. He could not blame her for marrying the boy, for loving him, for being happy. After all, her happiness was his own.
He looked at her still and peaceful face. How young and old she seemed to him all of a sudden. So often he had seen her stand strong on her own among a sea of men. She seemed so old in the Senate Meetings, so commanding on a ship full of war wearied soldiers. So old, he only remembered once when she looked young. The victory celebration on Naboo ten years ago. She had looked over and graced him with a youthful smile.
Alone against a sea of men…
How ironic that the two men she had loved were both unfaithful to her. He loved the Jedi more than he loved her; Anakin loved power above all things. His heart twinged in guilt at his own unfaithfulness.
He would be unfaithful to her no more. He would love no other, not even the rules of the Jedi. He would forever watch over her children, protect them and guide them when he could. He would love her children as he would love his own.
Obi-wan bent down to kiss the cold, clammy, lips. He put her hand over her heart.
"Forever faithful, Padmé," he whispered his goodbye. "I will be forever faithful to you."
He looked upon her calm form once more before leaving her empty room, never looking back.