"Would you like some coffee while you wait?" a young man asked.

"No," came the terse reply. "Piss off."

Dorian looked at the Russian but said nothing. He sounded so much like the Major he wondered if rude behavior was a part of intelligence officers' training.

After only a few minutes, the office door opened and they were waved inside. Dorian stopped dead in his tracks when he saw the Major in body chains and lashed to a chair. What the hell have you been doing to him?

"I thought you said Major Eberbach was unharmed," he heard Ivan say from beside him—in Russian. Then he saw the Major stiffened visibly. Sadistic bastard. You want him to know you're KGB, don't you?

"Don't worry, Ivan, he didn't suffer any permanent damage," Hans replied. "He tried to put up a fight."

Dorian saw the smug look come to the man's face and wanted to slap him. Christ, how I hate Neo Nazis.

"I don't believe I know your associate," Hans went on, a distinct edge coming to his voice.

Ivan switched to German as he said, "This is Mr. Johnson. He's not one of my associates, he's one of yours."

"Yeah, right."

"You don't think he's Aryan enough?"

"He looks like a fag."

Dorian ground his teeth but remained silent. He had agreed ahead of time to allow Ivan to do all the talking, although he was wishing he hadn't.

Ivan laughed at this. "He's supposed to. He's infiltrating the Gay Pride Parade next week."

"You're the mole?" Hans said in surprise.

Dorian could not help the smile of irony that came to his face. Yes, but not the kind you're thinking of, he thought as he gave a nod.

"I never would've known you were one of us," Hans went on to say. "You have my sympathies, having to pretend to be one of those degenerates. I hope you blow them all to Kingdom come."

I'd like to blow you lot to Kingdom come, Dorian thought angrily. He noticed the Major's reaction to this and could almost see the wheels turning in his head.

"Do you have the money?" Hans asked suddenly, returning Dorian to reality.

"As agreed," Ivan replied, placing the case in his hand on the desk and holding out a hand, inviting the other man to open it. Hans did, giving a satisfied grunt before giving his men a curt nod.

Ivan seemed to take his as his cue and turned toward the Major. "If you would untie him from the chair," he said mildly. "And the key to the cuffs would be nice, too."

"You're not thinking of letting him go," the man who had admitted them to the office said with a gasp.

"What kind of a fool do you take me for?" the Russian snapped impatiently.

The man who had been standing guard beside the Major looked over at Hans, receiving a nod. He nodded back before removing the ropes securing the officer to the chair. Dorian noticed the German did not move as this was done. Thickheaded Prussian. You want us to drag you out, don't you?

Suddenly the door burst open and a panicked voice called, "Hans! The building's being surrounded by NATO!"

Perfect timing, Dorian thought as he casually glanced at the clock. That will shake up this KGB bastard.

"What?" Hans gasped. He jumped to his feet and turned to the window, the others joining him.

Ivan turned to Dorian and nodded before pulling a piece of cloth from inside his collar, covering his mouth and nose. Dorian did the same, pulled out his can of knockout gas and waited.

"You morons!" Ivan snarled. "I thought you were supposed to be professionals!"

The instant the men turned back from the windows, Dorian and Ivan sprayed them with the gas. In a few seconds, the men were unconscious on the floor.

"Get the safe open," Ivan ordered suddenly.

"Consider it done," Dorian replied, knowing the Major would recognize his voice the moment he spoke. He went straight for where he had been told the safe would be located, a smile coming to his face when he saw it. He made short work of the lock while the Russian rifled through all the papers on the desk.

"What am I looking for?" he asked the instant he had the safe open.

"No time," Ivan replied. "Take everything."

Sounds good to me. There were only a few manila envelopes in the safe and Dorian pulled them out, sticking them into this waistband. Under these was the Major's gun, which he pocked with a smile. "Done," he announced as he got to his feet. "Let's get the hell out of here." He crossed to the Major and reached over to remove the gag from his mouth, nearly jumping out of his skin when Ivan snapped, "Don't!"


"You take that out of his mouth, he'll be shouting his head off."

How stupid do you think he is? Dorian thought as he stared at the man at the desk. "Fine, have it your way," he said tersely. "I'm taking these things off his ankles, though."

"Don't complain to me if he kicks you in the teeth."

Dorian gave a disgusted snort. He's probably wishing he could kick you in the teeth. He started to take the manacles off the Major's ankles and noticed that one was significantly swollen. He caught his breath, his eyes growing wide.

"What's the matter now?" Ivan snapped impatiently.

"His ankle's swollen," Dorian said as he got to his feet. He ignored the Russian's protests, removing the gag from the officer's mouth. "Major, can you stand?" he asked gently.

"Standing isn't a problem," the Major replied quietly. "It's walking I don't know about."

"I'll help you."

"No wonder the West is in decay," Ivan snorted. "You're all soft."

Klaus gritted his teeth, a groan escaping him as Dorian helped him to his feet. "What's your code name?" he asked through clenched teeth.

"Ivan the Terrible."

Dorian felt the Major stiffened upon hearing this. You're going to be pissed at me, I can tell. He was not disappointed when the Major snapped angrily, "You bloody idiot thief! You sold me out to the KGB!"

"Not exactly," Dorian replied mildly. "I agreed to help steal some information in exchange for you."

"And you trust this KGB bastard will keep his promises?"

"Probably as much as you trust me, Major," Dorian said as he pulled the Major forward. Now you just think about that for a while.

To Dorian's surprise, the Major seemed to do just that, falling silent and allowing him to help him from the room and out into a corridor. He didn't seem to be able to put any weight on his ankle, causing Dorian to think it was very likely broken.

Dorian waited until the lift arrived and then turned to Ivan. "You're not going to keep your side of the bargain, are you, Comrade?" he said mildly. He saw a smug look come to the Russian's face and smiled back, giving the Major a shove that sent him to the floor inside the lift with a cry of pain. Sorry, Major. Dorian then sprayed the knockout gas into the astonished Russian's face. "Thing is, Comrade, I wasn't going to keep my side either."

Ivan gave an angry gurgle before dropping to the ground. Dorian turned, having to jump between the doors just as they were closing.

The Major rolled onto his back and struggled unsuccessfully to sit up. "Get me off this bloody floor," he growled.

"Not yet," Dorian said as he pulled out a radio unit. "Mission accomplished."

"Is the Major with you, Lord Gloria?" Agent A replied.

"Yes. We're in position."

"Shall be begin the operation?"

The Major gave an impatient growl. "Get this damn thing off my face," he snapped.

Dorian pulled off the blindfold and then held out the radio unit.

"A! Whatever you lot have planned, do it! Or I'll have you all shipped off to Alaska!" Klaus thundered.

"Yes, sir!"

Dorian could not help smiling at the dark look this delighted reply produced.

"We're ready, sir," A announced. "Hang on."

Dorian braced himself as the lift plummeted to the basement parking garage level before jolting to a halt. He went to the door and locked it open. "Sit tight, Major," he said calmly and he strode out the doors, going on to lock all the other lifts open.

"Mr. A," he said into the radio unit as he returned to the Major, "lockdown complete."

"Tell him to concentrate on the stairwells," the Major ordered.

"I heard," A replied.

"The Major will need medical attention," Dorian informed. "He has an injured ankle that might be broken."

There as a short pause during which Dorian could imagine all the alphabets panicking. "We'll be down to collect you both once the building is secure," A replied.

Dorian knelt down, making short work of the cuffs on the Major's wrists, going on to remove the chain from around his waist. Then he sat down and leaning back against the wall. "Mission accomplished, Major," he said mildly, holding out the officer's gun.

"Where did you find that?" the Major asked as he sat up. He took the weapon and quickly checked it over.

"In the safe with all this lovely information," Dorian replied with a grin, holding out the envelopes he had been carrying.

The Major nodded approvingly. Then he seemed to look at him for the first time. "How did you get all your hair under that?"

Dorian felt a pang of grief at the thought of what he had done to his hair. It will grow back, he reminded himself. "I didn't."

The Major looked at the thief in shock. "You cut your hair?"

"Oh, Major," Dorian sighed. You really can be so thickheaded sometimes.

"You cut your hair, cooperated with the KGB, masqueraded as a Neo Nazi, and walked into the Lion's den… Why?"

Dorian gave him a steady look. "If you have to ask, it's not worth repeating," he said coolly.

"You're gonna say it's because you love me, aren't you?"

Dorian was surprised that the Major's tone wasn't his usual one of disgusted. It seemed more like surprise. "Major, I'd walk on hot coals to save you," he said forcefully. He saw an odd look pass over the Major's face when he said this. What on earth are you thinking?

The Major sighed heavily. "Oh, hell."

To Dorian's astonishment, the Major took his face in his hands and kissed him.


Eroica Yori Ai O Komete © Yasuko Aoike and Princess Comics; no profit is being made from this fan production and no disrespect is intended to the original creators.