W/N - choice of products can make the difference. I'm off to Vegas for a week so have fun.

A white wizard stands in a dark tower peering into a crystal sphere. The sphere is hazy, full of misty static. "My armies will crush the world of men!"

Another, identical wizard enters, holding up another sphere. He looks grim with a sour frown. "Hi, this is Saruman's Palantir. If Saruman had the Palantir Middle Earth Network instead of the Sauron Dark Network, he might actually get that emergency call…You know…those Ents are coming…run like hell!"

"But no…sadly, Saruman is going to get the surprise of his life."

*deep rumblings and crashing sounds*

Saruman's mouth falls open and orcs fall to the floor. Nearby, the fake wizard shrugs. "Maybe next time he'll listen to Grima."