Pairing: Roy x Edward
Summary: Roy Mustang is a man of reality.
Warnings: Shounen-ai. Implied suggestive themes.
Disclaimer: Me no own FMA.
Roy Mustang is a man of reality. He doesn't dream much, and when he does dream, he dreams of a future he is confident of creating. He dreams of things that he has the power of achieving. But, sometimes, sometimes reality is too much, and then Roy dreams of want and need and a vibrant goldness. When Roy dreams of such things, he wakes up terrified, with an empty pang in his heart, and still filled with giddy desires.
At work, it takes a lot of restraint and self-control, refined over the years as a soldier, to not push the boy against the wall and kiss him hard and claim him as his own. He likes to fantasize, likes to imagine leaving the boy breathless and awed and wanting more, and in his mind's eye, he visualizes honey-coloured eyes glazed over from lust, shining with a silent plea.
He feels ashamed at times when he sees the childish innocence of the boy, and he wonders how he could dare to harm such purity, such divine purity. He feels scared, scared of his own powerful desires, and the way his whole body is set on fire whenever he dreams.
He tries to ignore it, push it down to the darkest corner of his mind, but it is more than a mere flickering flame. It burns too strongly, and when it burns, he can see nothing but a sea of blinding red fire.
But he still has his heart. It hasn't been stolen yet; he isn't in love. It is all just lust, lust and animal desires. He can escape. There is still hope, as long as his heart is still his, and he believes can make it, he can find the exit in this deadly furnace.
One day, he loses control, and he pushes the boy against the wall and kisses him hard and claims him as his own.
It is not until the boy kisses him back, clumsy but with emotion, that he realizes his heart has never been his. All along, he has been foolishly convincing himself what has never been true.
A breathtaking smile of happiness clears his sight, and he lets go of the false reality he has built up for himself. His heart belongs to Edward Elric, and Edward Elric is willing to give him his heart, too.
A/N: A year since my first fanfic! I can't believe it. Looking back at my first work, I feel really surprised. I can't believe I wrote that rubbish. I'm not exactly saying what I write now isn't rubbish at all, it still is kinda crappy, but at least it's improved a lot since. Lately I seem to quite enjoy the theme of fire. xD At our school, in chapel, when we were practising hymns, in some of the hymns there were the words 'fire' and 'flame', and our teacher was like, "What is it with you and fire? Everytime a hymn has something relating to burning, you get this lovely richness in your voices all of a sudden." xDDDDD It's true. Our voices always get louder and richer and more enthusiastic whenever this kind of words appear. Anyway, please read & review!