A/N: This originally started off as two story ideas - one was a random tangent, and one was a sequel to the series episode "Spats" - but I decided to merge them. This takes place a year before Lilo & Stitch's Star Trek, so as of yet, there is no 419, 426 or 628. Enjoy!
Legal Disclaimer: Lilo, Stitch, Jumba, Pleakley, Nani, the Grand Councilwoman, Gantu, 625, Merwin and Dean(?) are copyright © 2002-2006 Disney Enterprises, Inc. I wish I owned them, but hey, what can ya do? All other characters mentioned in this fanfic are © meh.


Aliens
Chapter 1: Teleboxes

"…accused of illegal genetic experimentation!"
Pleakley sat on the sofa; every now and then flinging some so called 'popcorn' into his mouth.
"How do you plead?"
"Not guilty! My experiments are…"
THUD. THUD. THUD.
Jumba walked into the room, a can of paint stuck on his foot.
"Don't ask," he muttered as he lowered himself onto the couch. He groaned.
"What are you watching thi…"
His eyes widened as he saw what was on the television.
"…completely within legal boundaries."
"We believe that you…"
"WHY ARE YOU… WHO GAVE YOU THAT TAPE?"
"Created something? Ha! That would be…"
"Calm down, Mr. Four Eyes."
"…and unethical. I would never ever…"
Pleakly stuck out one finger.
"Number one: Everyone in the Galactic Federation has a copy of that tape."
"…make more than one!"
He stuck out a second.
"Number duo: this isn't a video."
"THEN WHY IS IT ON THE TELE-BOX?"
"MONSTROSITY? What you see before…"
"Because it's broadcasting."
"WHAT!"

"In our where are they now segment: Dr. Jumba Jookiba mysteriously vanished in the year 4107, Turo Central Time, hardly two days after his famous trial, which was broadcast to almost every television channel in the Federation. See "The Galactic Federation v. Galaxy Defense Agencies", "The Galactic Federation v. Dr. Jumba Jookiba, PhD". The Galactic High Council has declined to comment on the whereabouts of Jookiba. The Grand Councilwoman had this to say:"
The GCW appeared on the screen, standing behind a podeum, amid flash photography and numerous news station's microphones.
"Jumba Jookiba is of no concern to the Federation. The galaxy can sleep safe knowing that Jookiba is somewhere where he won't be a problem."
"However, a call was detected from the Galactic Federation's Detention Cell 4 to a location in Hawaii, Earth, one earth-year later. One of the callers was Jumba Jookiba; the other was Agent Wendy Pleakley. A recording of the call shows that Pleakley had initiated said call from a small town dubbed by the Federation 'EAUS50HK4', named by its inhabitants 'Kokaua Town, in the tropical island of Kaua'i, on planet Terran III, otherwise known as Earth. Earth has been designated 'off-limits' by the Federation for over 50 Earth-years, ever since a ship of Plorgarian scientists crash-landed in Rose Well, Kantooka America. Well, I'll bet they have a ko-cou-wa# time over there!"
The newsreader laughed to himself.
"Over to you, Janka. Any falling egg jokes?"
The alien named Janka, who looked kind of like Pleakley, shuffled his papers.
"Well, there's going to be a magnetic flare-up in Sector G1, and a new wormhole has appeared due to gravi-flux effects… the wormhole, dubbed WH593752, forms a new link between planet P8X873, a.k.a. Wolf 272B, and P3X984, a.k.a. Prometheus Alpha. And last, but not least, a fault in the G273 model hyperdrive has resulted in a pileup on the intergalactic engineway – massive traffic jams quadrant wide! DriveThrough have initiated a recall of all drives affected. Means I'll be taking the spacie§ home today…"
Janka sighed. His colleague nodded.
"I know what you mean. Well, this is Kanyu Betcha…"
"… and Janka Varymah…"
"…saying glakto blanda."

Meanwhile, on the other side of Kokaua Town, in the backyard of someone-or-another's house, there was a run-down dirty old shack. And if one were to peek inside the shattered window-pane, one would see two people: one was leaning on the precipice between 'normal-sized' and 'fat', the other was about as thin and tall as Pleakley. Both were human, but one was holding what, to the untrained eye, looked like a Sootal Series-300 Plasma Converter, but was really made of tissue paper rolls and Sellotape.
"Uhuh, I've got it!"
The bigger of the two got up and examined his work.
He had been tuning the television in some manner, and he smiled as glyphs foreign-looking to any English-speaking person on Earth filled the display.
"…Riro ando Suteicchi Ze Suriizu… Deisunii Chyannaru no…"
A blue fluffy dog-like creature jumped around inside the T.V., holding a plasma cannon.
"Er… Merwin…"
"What?" Merwin half-shouted in a rather annoyed voice.
"That's Japan's Deisunii Channel.'"
Merwin glanced at the screen. His face fell.
"Oh."
Crestfallen, he returned to his quiet tinkering.


# This is alien humour, not supposed to be understandable by 'Earthies'. A cou-wa is a type of fish on Turo, it also means 'thrill'. 'Ko-cou', on the other hand, is a variety of egg. Just so ya know, I don't get it either.
§ Interstellar bus.