I'm not going to say you absolutely have to read Potion Torture before this, but it could help. Who knows.

The idea for this was basically from a friend. All I did was elaborate. A lot.

All pairings (AkuRoku, Zemyx, LexZex, XemnasSaix, SaixAxel, VexenMarluxia) will be onesided. As this is the first chapter, there aren't any pairings yet. That'll start next chapter.

Pandemonium Ensues

Chapter 1

Poison The Cake

(hints of Zemyx)

One month. That's how long it had been since the trouble with the love potions.

A single month since Larxene had chased after Axel. There was still tension between them. Axel had made the mistake of referring to it as "sexual tension" once, and had had to spend the the following two days in the infirmary.

A single month since Luxord - and Demyx himself - had been cured. Demyx still refused to sit next to him, and instead sat beside Roxas at all meetings.

A single month since Zexion had first annouced his refusal to be anywhere near Saix for longer than twenty minutes. That at least had sped up Xemnas's meetings, changing them from longwinded hour long speeches to twenty minutes and no longer.

And a single month since Vexen had put child-proof caps on all of his completed potions, stopping Demyx from trying anything.

Demyx, standing in front of Vexen's lab table, scowled. For the past fifteen minutes, he had been trying to wrench the caps off of several potions, but nothing he tried had worked. Sighing, Demyx grabbed ten different potions and shoved them in his pockets. He supposed he'd find Xigbar - who had gotten drunk last night and had a severe hangover - and ask him to open them for him. Fortuntely for him, Xigbar was suffering and barely even registered what Demyx said.

"Do what?" Xigbar muttered, squinting at the boy before him.

Demyx sighed and held a potion out to Xigbar. "Open?"

Xigbar grunted and accepted the potion, twisting the cap until it clicked. One by one, he repeated what he had done with the other potion and handed them all to Demyx.

"Thanks!" Demyx said, leaving his room.

Xigbar grunted again and collasped back on his bed, falling asleep immedietely.

- - - - -

Demyx was now standing in front of the kitchen stove. On the stove sat three different cake mixes. He sighed. Someone must have reminded Zexion that he had fallen for Saix. Everytime he was reminded, Zexion baked.

And everytime Zexion baked, one or more members ended up sick.

Demyx glanced over the cake mixes - red velvet, German chocolate, and plain chocolate - and decided to empty the potions into the red velvet mix. He grinned as he worked. Red velvet happened to be Xemnas's favorite, and while he knew he's be punished when it was over, he couldn't wait to see what it would do.

He paused, tenth potion poised over the cake mix, and listened.


Demyx slammed the cap on the potions and darted to the fridge, opening the freezer and shoving the potion into his pocket as two voices drifted into the kitchen.

"Ten potions. Missing! I swear, if-"


"I don't care."


"I'm busy, and I don't want to - Demyx."

Demyx jumped at the sound of his name.

"What are you doing?" Zexion asked.

Demyx reached deeper into the fridge and groped around. "Uh... popsicle?" he said, pulling his hand out of the freezer and holding up his prize. "Er... Fudge pop..." He shrugged, then unwrapped the popsicle and popped it into his mouth.

Zexion rolled his eyes and dipped a spoon into the red velvet mix, stirring it a little. "Whatever, Demyx," he said, lifting a bit of the mix out and tasting it. He paused. "Wait."

Demyx, halfway out the door, stopped and turned to see another spoon thrust into his face.

"Help me," Zexion said as Demyx took the spoon. "Stir the German chocolate mix for me."

Demyx paused, then stepped beside Zexion and began to follow his order, slowly, while staring at the man beside him. "Er...Zexy?"



Demyx was cut off as Vexen coughed. Zexion sighed and stopped his stirring to gaze at the scientist.

"Yes, Vexen?"

Vexen cleared his throat before talking. "My potions have gone missing, and I would like it if you would stop your baking long enough to help me - Demyx!"

Demyx snickered. He lowered the spoon back into the cake mix as Vexen wiped German chocolate off his face. Frowning, the scientist withdrew from the kitchen, muttering about needing to take his second shower in two hours.


Demyx looked over at Zexion, who promptly snatched the fudge pop out of his mouth.

"You're getting fudge in my German chocolate," Zexion said, tasting the red velvet again. "If you want to get fudge in anything, get in the plain chocolate. Fudge doesn't belong in German chocolate. Ruins the taste of it."

Demyx rolled his eyes and continued stirring, ignoring Zexion's grunt of protest as he mixed the fudge that had dripped off his popsicle with the cake mix.

He only stopped when Zexion stuck his half-eaten popsicle into his mouth.

"Dude! Zexion!" He let go of the spoon as Zexion did the same. "Why are you eating my popsicle? There's only half of it left..." He paused. "Not to mention, it's been in my mouth..."

Zexion only smirked and pulled the popsicle out of his mouth to lick some of the melting chocolate off.

Demyx continued to stare as Zexion gazed - eyes half-closed - at him.

"I don't really see the difference," Zexion said slowly. "In your mouth or not..." He paused to lick more chocolate off the popsicle. "It still tastes the same."

Demyx grinned unsurely. Zexion usually found anything that had been in his mouth the most disgusting thing in the castle, and would usually get rid of it promptly. Which was the main reason he wasn't sure he wanted to stay alone with Zexion anymore. "Uh...heh... That's...uh...nice," he muttered, backing up towards the door. "Well... I'm going to go and...practice a new song, so... Call me when the cakes are ready!" He turned around and ran, hearing Zexion shout from the kitchen:

"Of course, Demyx! The red velvet is delicious! You'll love it!"

Demyx was very sure he wouldn't love the red velvet cake.

- - - - -

Later, the entire Organization was seated around the table - the only table long enough to fit them all comfortably - waiting for Zexion to put the cakes on the table so that they could eat them.

Of course, "entire" might be the wrong word. Xigbar, still suffering from his hangover, was no where to be seen. Roxas, claiming that Zexion's cakes always made him sick (not because they were nasty, but because he found them so good that he always ate too much), had stayed in his room. Marluxia, who was putting the finishing touches on his renovated garden, was probably still crouched in front of some odd plant he had discovered.

As Zexion came to the table with the three cakes, a black portal appeared at one end of the table and revealed Marluxia, looking quite tired and very angry.

"Just one piece of normal chocolate," he snarled as Zexion set the cakes on the table. "Nothing else. I don't really trust your cooking yet."

Zexion frowned and shoved the entire cake his way. "Enjoy," he spat, slumping into his seat and watching as the others dove for the cakes.

"Hmm..." Axel murmured, looking at all three cakes in deep thought. "I think I'll have a piece of each!"

"Axel," Larxene said, her mouth full of chocolate. "You touch that German chocolate cake and your hand comes off."

Axel smirked. "Two pieces of red velvet then."

Demyx, sitting in his respectful place - beside Larxene, since Roxas wasn't coming - grinned and shoved a big bite of German chocolate into his mouth to stifle the giggles.

Several members - Xemnas, Vexen, Lexaeus, Zexion, Saix, and Axel, to be exact - had decided to eat the cake he had put the potions into.

He couldn't help but giggle.

This would be fun.

This is me making fun of yaoi by once again using Vexen's potions. All those nine potions Demyx mixed together have a bad outcome. Which you could probably guess. I don't want any flames for this just because you get mad that I'm making fun of some of your favorite pairings.

The tenth potion Demyx stole shall be used in a later chapter.