StarsOfYaoi: I cannot believe how many of you liked the first drabble. O.o I'm rather shocked –I truly thought it'd be far too stupid…
Anyway, I want to remind you people that this series is crack. There will be appearance of Otogakure somewhere in the future, who knows when (meaning, Orochimaru, Sasuke, etc). I can't resist the appeal of adding something to embarrass them, after all.
And it's supposed to be random drabbles, so don't expect always funny things. There will be angsty, romance, everything I feel like writing at the moment.
Note for chapter: funny thing you might know –'danna' ('master'), which is how Deidara calls Sasori, also means 'husband'.
Next update: Whenever I feel like it.
Rating: usually, PG–13…
Summary: (ItaNaru) Collection of short drabbles with weird!Akatsuki, and Akatsuki!Naruto. Will have also SasoDeida, KakuHida and maybe ZetsuTobi (for fun).
Warnings: yaoi, boy x boy relationship, OOC warning as well.
Disclaimer: Do not own Naruto. Masashi Kishimoto does.
–Flashbacks, memories, dreams–
Drabble 02: Art
Deidara had a very funny way to see the world, Naruto couldn't deny that.
It was nothing… strange, per se. yes, maybe a bit weird, but Naruto had come to appreciate the straw haired shinobi after a few days of knowing him, so no harm done.
Now, after all that time, they had come to know each other rather well, and even though Naruto still thought Deidara was weird (and Deidara not–so–secretly believed the same about the blond teen), the two had become quite good friends.
Deidara loved clay.
He loved to shape it in form of spiders and other small animals, especially birds; Naruto thought it to be cute, but others, like Kisame, could only shudder when they found the three–mouthed shinobi playing around with his little creatures without a care in the world.
Naruto had once asked Shark–face about it, but the moment the man had opened his mouth to answer him, Itachi had swooped down, grabbing Naruto by his waist and stomping away. He had then proceeded to forbid the blond from asking again, commenting on an unrequited obsession Deidara had that shouldn't be addressed publicly or privately.
Naruto didn't get it –what was wrong with little cute birds?– but had decided not to ask.
Still, that didn't mean he couldn't ask the bomber man about other things.
More than ever when he was bored out of his mind, Itachi was not around to take his mind away from things, and he couldn't play with Kisame.
"Deidei?" Naruto was currently sprawled on the couch, staring intently at the other shinobi as he carefully inserted a bomb mechanism into one of his clay creations.
The straw haired man flashed Naruto a small smile –that looked more like a weird tilted smirk, a sight that had Naruto cringing every time the was on the receiving end during the first weeks he had joined Akatsuki– and his visible eye seemed to brighten up all at once.
Naruto smiled back with equal intensity.
"Why do you and Sasori always bitch about what art is?"
A fond look made its way onto Deidara's face.
"Because we have very different ideas on what art is, un!" he replied, winking at the blond teen.
"So, what is art for you?" he asked then, watching with mirth as the small deathly weapon flapped its wings onto Deidara's hand.
For a glorious moment, Naruto's brain thought about all the things he could do with one of these bombs –but then he hastily stopped himself. He remembered too well Itachi's reaction to his last prank –it hadn't been nice.
"Art is what's sudden and evanescent, of course," Deidara replied, pleased at Naruto's curiosity and tapping the head of his clay bird with a finger. It almost looked like he cared for the thing. "Something that is bound to disappear, like the fleeting moment of an explosion…"
Naruto watched with fascination as Deidara threw the bird into the air, delighted when after a second of wildly flapping around, it exploded soundly, sending pieces of hardened clay everywhere in the room.
Deidara puffed out his chest.
"But Sasori says art is what is eternal," Naruto continued, watching amusedly as part of the room's walls crumbled at the explosion. "I think I understand why you fight…"
With that he left, acutely aware that Leader wouldn't be happy; and he was right, because the man passed at his side moments later, and his expression was nothing sort of thundering.
Which was much to say since his face was covered with darkness anyway.
It was nothing strange, though. It was the tenth time Deidara destroyed a part of their hideout while experimenting with bombs –if not for the funds their organization received thanks to Sasori's puppet shows, Itachi's fans scattered around the world (Akatsuki provided a good amount of photos, pictures, posters, videos objects belonging to the Uchiha, who was oblivious to that) and some slightly illegal stuff (growing… plants… on Zetsu's head, albeit useful, wasn't exactly legal, nor was selling dead people's bodies to the black market), they'd be broke by now.
Naruto wondered why no one ever tried to sell Deidara's bombs to villages celebrating festivities. Shrugging it off, he decided they probably had some good explanation for that.
Again, Naruto found himself having fun.
"Art is a bang!"
"No, art is eternal!"
"Eternal is boring~! Something that never changes gets old after a while!"
"No, it becomes proof of its existence, as something that remains unchanging through time and time again!"
"But then those who see it later can't understand its importance –something that disappears is more important, because its memory is the only glory and proof that it existed, and so grows the myth!"
On the right was Deidara, with a big smirk that showed just how much he was having fun.
Naruto wondered if these two ended up like this with every mission they had together.
"But memory is fleeting, whilst what remains can be observed and admired, to catch all the small details the author wanted it to express!"
On the left was Sasori, twitching, fingers aching to lift and throttle the other shinobi.
Naruto wondered why the guy never seemed to really loosen up unless he was fighting with Deidara.
In a way, it was like a tennis game –straight, direct to the point, from one side to the other…
"What disappears can't give a wrong impression!"
"What remains can't be easily forgotten!"
"Art has to go!"
"Art has to stay!"
Now, despite how entertaining these two could be, Naruto wasn't one to keep attention on something for too long; he wasn't one for long speeches, and he wasn't able to think too much about stuff –proof of that was how he entered a battle without thinking, rushing through without a plan– but even so, he wasn't stupid either.
He had an inkling that both sides had a fairly accurate percentage of being right, which meant they had an equal percentage of being wrong, too.
Naruto frowned, his face scrunching up into his usual fox-like thoughtful expression.
They always ended up fighting and yelling at each other like this, so why couldn't they just accept each other's idea and just let go? Or if not that, they could accept the fact that they would never be able to move the other into agreeing with them.
Why always fight?
A certain fox inside his body started to cough obnoxiously at that, choking onto his laughter, but Naruto ignored him, even when Kyuubi made a scathingly comment about how he'd have a field day next time the Oto–nin were invited over for tea.
Kyuubi would definitely have fun teasing Naruto about his and Sasuke's… 'nice, pacific speeches' which included a lot of Rasengan and Chidori blasts, snakes, ropes, Kage Bunshin and crumbling walls.
Yes, nice and pacific alright.
"Itachi–rin," he whined as his lover appeared at his side, rolling his eyes at the familiar sight of the Sand shinobi and the bomber verbally fighting once again. "If they always get this angry, why fight in the first place?"
Kisame, who had been also watching the fight with a weird glint in his eyes, turned around and focused his attention from polishing his sword's handle to Naruto, wanting to hear Itachi's answer to that.
Itachi had to smirk at the lovely face his cute Naruto had. "They enjoy the arguing, even if it doesn't look like it –they are not willing to admit that they respect each other's point of view either," he added, his smirk turning wicked.
Naruto blinked in confusion.
"What do you mean?"
"Art is a bang, Sasori–danna!" Deidara yelled, lips stretched into an excited smirk.
"Art is eternal, you dunce!" Sasori grimaced, but there was no hatred in his tone. Nor anger.
"Hmmm, you can call it… foreplay, if you want," Kisame grunted, but he was smirking at the blond as he said that.
Naruto accepted that at face's value and thought about it for a bit more, then he schooled his expression into one of bathed curiosity.
"Itachi–rin, what is art for you?"
Itachi's eyes instantly switched to the Sharingan, spinning almost dangerously; Naruto had barely the time to feel his aura flaring up, then he was suddenly lifted up and held bridal style in Itachi's strong, welcoming arms.
Blushing and spluttering in embarrassment at the undignified position, catching the mischievous smirk on Kisame's face, mirrored on Itachi's one, Naruto tried to push Itachi away –and failed.
"Art," Itachi concluded, walking towards their chambers with Naruto tucked possessively in his arms, "is sex".
And Sasori, who was now busy tying up a fuming (but not exactly unwilling) Deidara with his puppets' strings, ready to take their battle to more private grounds, secretly agreed.
StarsOfYaoi: try commenting on this one, too! :)