I return. I hope you enjoy this little something I cooked up for you.

Chapter 13


Either that cheese and spinach sandwich I had earlier was rancid and I'm hallucinating, or Sasuke just kissed some part of Hinata's face.

Sakura could not help but stare, open-mouthed, eyes bulging with surprise at the event that had just taken place before her eyes. Sasuke, her Sasuke, had just planted a big, wet one right on Hinata's forehead. It was her forehead, right?

What. The. Fuck.

Sakura's hands clenched into angry fists; she slammed her drink harder into the table than was necessary, creating a loud noise. Unfortunately, Ino noticed.

"What's wrong with you?" Ino asked, frowning at Sakura's sudden change in demeanor. By reflex, Sakura's angry eyes darted again to the lawn, where the inconspicuous Sasuke-Hinata showdown was still going down. Ino caught the direction Sakura's eyes traveled, and shifted her posture to look at the lawn as well, a curious expression appearing on her face.

"What are Hinata and Sasuke doing out on the lawn?" she asked, more loudly than was necessary. Sakura could have smacked her forehead against the table at Ino's lack of tact.

Well, there goes inconspicuous.

"Hinata and Sasuke? What?" Kiba asked instantly, also joining Ino by the window. This also drew the attention of Naruto, who had been eating next to Kiba, and wondered the same thing in an ever louder voice. When others at the table had also abandoned their plates to go see what all the commotion was, Sakura realized she had made a very big mistake.

But still, even she couldn't restrain herself from bounding over to the window when sudden cries of "Oh my god!" and "Oh, SHIT" rang from the crowd assembled by the window. Sakura scrambled over to the crowd and let her jaw drop at what she saw.

A certain blue-haired, white eyed somebody was going to have a lot questions (and consequently a beating, a shove down the stairs and a severe head-shaving) to answer to after dinner.


Hinata gaped, open-mouthed at Uchiha Sasuke, who was standing but a foot away from her, the smuggest look plastered across his annoyingly pretty face.

"You-You," she stammered, backing away from him as fast as she could on crutches. "You-"

"What?" he taunted, folding his arms across his chest. "Spit it out."

Hinata tried to settle her breathing, but she was dizzy, her head and thoughts were spinning out of control. She tried to put into words the rage and confusion that had sent her careening from the present, right-side-up reality into this alternate universe where Sasuke had not only just kissed her forehead, but also whispered things into her ear.

"You," Hinata said, looking anywhere but him. "Y-you are so confusing…and frustrating. I r-really can't stand you."

"That much is obvious," he retorted, rolling his eyes. After a small pause he added, "Anything else you would like to say? Hopefully this time it's something remotely intelligent."

Hinata boiled over with rage. That was enough. This smug bastard thought he could irritate, confuse, berate, frustrate and just completely insult her to the point where she was about to rip her own hair off and drown herself in the nearest toilet just so she wouldn't have to see his idiot face again, and he was going to get away with it?

Not anymore you're not.

This skinny, ass-pale Uchiha had obviously never come face to face with a raging (and according to the calendar, pre-menstrual) Hyuuga woman.

Throwing her crutches on the floor angrily, Hinata hobbled forward a few paces until she was about two feet away from Sasuke. She stood resolutely in front of him, her lavender eyes gleaming with long-suppressed fury. Hinata noticed, with an even greater increase of rage, that he was still smirking. She took a deep breath, formed her hand into a fist, and before she talked herself out of it, smashed it into Uchiha Sasuke's pretty face.

Hinata could have laughed as he stumbled backwards, the force of her blow sending him straight to the floor. She smiled; his lower lip was bleeding. Hinata took out a small napkin from the pocket of her jacket and placed it on the floor next to him, where his eyes where still wide with shock.

"Y-you should get some ice on that," she said softly. Then without another word, Hinata turned on her heel, picked up her crutches, and walked away in a glorious image of blazing triumph.


"Our little Hinata really did punch Sasuke, didn't she?" asked Ino as she lounged on Hinata's bed. " I didn't imagine it?"

"Oh yes, she did," Sakura said, drumming her fingers on the desk impatiently. "And we're going to find out why."

It was later that evening, and Hinata had not been seen since that afternoon. Kiba and Naruto had roared with laughter for hours after they saw what had happened, and had cornered Sasuke as he walked into the school with his bruised lip. One glare, two snarls and several insults later, the two rowdy boys were nowhere closer to finding out what had happened from Sasuke than Ino and Sakura were to going out with him. About universe and three potatoes away.

After the episode on the lawn, the crowd at the window had disbanded, most wondering what provoked Hyuuga Hinata to hit Sasuke, but more importantly, just why Sasuke had let a girl hit him like that. It was common knowledge that he would decimate anyone who came a few inches too close, so why had he not retaliated? Or even made any move to stop it?

Because he's a gentleman and doesn't hit girls, one part of Sakura said.

That's why he didn't think twice about nearly breaking your arm last year, right? her other, larger half said.

Sakura wilted a little, remembering the painful memory. Even though Sasuke slammed her into the nearest wall with enough force to knock over a rhino, she'd at least walked away with Sasuke's first kiss (from a girl). Sakura let out a sad little sigh, remembering how hopeful that day had seemed, up until she'd kissed him and he rejected her, brutally. The upside of it was that Sasuke's lips were very soft, and he smelled good, like peppermint and something that reminded her vaguely of candy. It was a shame it only lasted for a few seconds.

But today, today he'd been the one to kiss Hinata. Not the other way around. Of course, a kiss on the forehead was hardly romantic, but coming from Sasuke it was like a marriage proposal complete with a romantic honeymoon on a Caribbean resort. The image of Sasuke grabbing Hinata and lowering his mouth to her flashed through Sakura's mind. Maybe she was reading into it too much.

But even so, Sakura's stomach clenched, and she felt an angry, resentful feeling she'd really never felt before seep into her. She took a deep breath, and attempted to get rid of it. When it finally hit her, she realized that if her suspicions were right, she was in for a long, depressing year.

Holy shit. I think I might be jealous of Hinata.


Hyuuga Neji was a very frightening person when he wanted to be.

"C-cousin, h-hello," Hinata stuttered, gasping in surprise as Neji wordlessly grabbed her arm and pushed her into the nearest empty room. "How are you?"

Neji stared at her, his face revealing nothing of what he was thinking.

"What were you doing with Sasuke earlier today?" he asked bluntly, folding his arms across his chest.

Hinata blushed, had he seen them? Had he seen the argument?

"W-we were working on a p-project," she answered, keeping her eyes resolutely on the floor. " I-in the library, that's all."

"What kind of project involves you striking him?" he asked. Hinata gasped and lifted her eyes to look at him.

"You saw?" she asked, wringing her hands together.

Neji gave her a small smile. " I did."

Hinata hid her face behind her bangs, her blood rushing to her face in humiliation. Well, it could be worse.

"And so did everyone else."

It took all of her energy to not faint on the spot.


"There she comes!"

Sakura spun around in her chair in time to see Hyuuga Hinata run into the room and shut the door, her face bright red, her eyes big and scared. She looked as if she'd met with death herself.

Or just had another encounter with Sasuke.

Sakura was definitely finding out.

"Where have you been?" Ino demanded, getting up from the bed and stomping over to where Hinata was standing, paralyzed.

"Um…a-around," the shorter girl responded, looking at the floor. " W-why are you two here?"

"Because we want to know exactly what the hell is going on between you and Sasuke," Sakura said harshly, before Ino could say anything.

Hinata grimaced. "You saw too?"

"Hinata, half of the cafeteria did," Ino supplied dramatically, sinking back into the bed.

Hinata looked up, her eyes wet. "I-it's not what it looks like. I…We…l-look, I really dislike him. A-and I'm sure he f-feels the same. That kiss was more of a-an insult than anything else-"

"Kiss?" Ino interjected, sitting up. "What kiss? I didn't see a kiss," she said, staring at Hinata, a mixture of envy and curiosity in her eyes. "Sasuke kissed you?"

"On the forehead, I think," Sakura said slowly, not removing her eyes from the wall. "I couldn't really tell." It had better been the forehead.

Sakura was angry. Very angry.

"What did you say? What did he say? And why on earth would you hit him after he kissed you?" Ino nearly cried, her blue eyes large with surprise. " Sasuke kissed you!"

"I a-already told you," Hinata said, sounding agitated. "It was not what it looked like. I felt more i-insulted than anything else."

"Is that why you hit him then?" Ino asked incredulously.

Hinata bit her lip. " Partly, b-but I'd r-rather keep that to myself, if you don't mind." And without another word, she proceeded to gather the various toiletries and things she would need for bed. Hinata was exhausted. She just wanted to sleep and deal with people in the morning, preferably never. She couldn't figure out why it was such a big deal. So she'd punched him. So what? It's not like she wasn't completely incapable of losing her temper. She had feelings, after all.

" You're really not going to tell us anything, are you?" Sakura asked as Hinata gathered her toiletries and pajamas in her hands.

Hinata stopped as she reached the bathroom. " No, I-I'm not. So p-please do not ask me again."

Ino gaped at Sakura as Hinata entered the bathroom without another word. Sakura narrowed her eyes. She was finding out what was going on between the love of her life and Hinata, one way or the other.


Monday arrived faster than Hinata would have liked. After spending all of Sunday hiding out in the empty library, she was not looking forward to the long, hard day was in front her.

She was sure the news of her and Sasuke's conflict had spread, and that she would be bombarded with questions from more than one person. Hinata groaned as she walked to her first class. Already she was receiving strange looks from people; yet she still did not understand why it was such a big deal for them, especially the girls.

Hinata entered the classroom as quietly as she could and took her preferred seat in the back. Thankfully, no one noticed her entrance. And if somebody did, they did not say anything about it.

When Sasuke entered however, the entire classroom went quiet. Hinata sunk down as far as she could in her chair. She was sure there would be some awful Sasuke-revenge coming her way soon, but she had yet to mentally prepare herself for it.

Sasuke ignored the stares he received as he searched for an empty chair. There was an empty one next to Hinata, and another one right in the middle of the first row; one that was hardly ever occupied because everyone knew the teacher was a raging sadist who loved to frazzle and torture the student sitting closest to him to the point of insanity. That, combined with the fact that he spat compulsively made it the most hated seat in the entire classroom.

Sasuke started to walk towards the back, where Hinata was sitting. Her heart began to race.

Why do I get the feeling I won't make it out of here alive?

She kept her eyes resolutely to the front of the classroom, ignoring the stares from the peers and the fact that with each second that passed, Sasuke got closer to her- and coincidentally so did her death. Hinata was so frightened, she couldn't even breathe.

Why did I have to hit him?

By now, one could hear a pin drop in the room. Everyone was either dreading or looking forward to another Hyuuga/Uchiha argument. The tension between them was palpable.

When Sasuke was a few inches away from her, he stopped. Hinata was turning blue from the lack of oxygen. She stared straight ahead, praying that whatever he had in store for her wouldn't hurt too much.

But instead of drawing of drawing a dagger and impaling it into Hinata, Sasuke shot her the foulest, evilest, most furious glare she'd ever seen. It was a glare that made her blood run cold and her heart completely stop beating. That look alone nearly made her curl up into a fetal position and whimper with fear. Because only two other people had ever been on receiving end of The Glare, and one of them (Itachi) had disappeared, never to be seen again. The other, (Naruto) had mysteriously been sent to the emergency room in need of an immediate blood transfusion and a cast for his shattered knee only days after Sasuke had sent it his way. The Glare was most definitely a force not be reckoned with. It also meant that impending doom was near. She gulped.

After a few seconds, Sasuke then continued on his way, he did not take the seat next to Hinata. No, he walked around the room and settled down in the dreaded front-row seat. Hinata knew what this meant. He'd rather be spitten on by a middle-aged man for a quarter of an hour than share any breathing room with her. He truly hated her, then. It's strange, what public humiliation can do for a person.

And now, he's going to kill me or make me disappear. Probably both.

At that moment, getting down on her knees and begging for his forgiveness didn't seem so bad for the terrified Hyuuga girl.

Either way she went about it; it was going to be an awful, excruciating experience.

Some of you have expressed concern that the story is a little all over the place, and I would just like to say that, well, it's kind of the point. If by now you haven't realized this, this story is mainly a bit of a farce with some satirical undertones. I love the many clichés that exist out there as much as the next person, and if I said that I was not shamelessly exploiting them here I would be lying. From the project-partner-with-the-one-you-hate bit to Sasuke's IhateherNoShe'sCuteWaitWHAT?!, to the many damsel in distress scenarios that I have put in here so far (and to the ones I have planned), this story is an exaggeration of the drama that exists in the life of an adolescent. I love writing this story and making it as ridiculous as can be; and I think I should have warned you earlier that it was not to be taken too seriously. It is merely a telling of the events in the lives of growing adolescents that (unfortunately for them) must face the many ass-backwards situations I gleefully put them in.

As of now, I have no plans as to how I'm going to end this story; just that it will be a lunatic, crazy ride right to the last chapter. Our beloved Hinata will be faced with much, but no fear, she will persevere.

Thank you to all that enjoy this story, it is because of you I write. Please leave a review, I cannot stress enough how much a nonsensical rant about this chapter (or any, really) can make my day.

Cheers to you, my lovely readers.