TITLE: She's Calling For Me
AUTHOR: Goddess Isa
EMAIL: goddessisa@aol.com
SUMMARY: Tragedy brings Angel back to Sunnydale - now what??
SPOILER: Pangs, I Will Remember You
DISTRIBUTION: Sandee, of course - My site - http://planetslaythis.homestead.com - Crystal and Butterfly if they want it - A Soul's Redemption - Anyone else - sure, just email me & lmk where it's going - I like seeing my name in print =)
FEEDBACK: Please, I'd hate to have to Slay for it. =P
RATING: TV-PG
DISCLAIMER: Fiona is mine. The rest belong to Joss. The song at the end (I think) belongs to Four Star Mary.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: The ***** distinguish a change in POV from Buffy to Angel and back.



"Buffy's *married*?"

The words stung deep into my soul. I hadn't expected to see Willow at my door, and her announcement that Joyce was dead and had been for some time had been at bit of a shock in itself. I expected her next statement to explain the large diamond on her left hand and not why Buffy hadn't called me in three years.

"The wedding was almost three years ago," she went on. "She's only been widowed for two days."

I dropped my drink and the glass shattered on the cement flooring. "A widow?"

She nodded. "Giles. He was supposed to be picking up an ancient book from some Spellkeeper, it was a trap. We feel it was an inside job with the Council. You haven't seen Wesley, have you?"

I gulped. "Not in around two years." the whelp had run off with another former Watcher. Another former *male* Watcher. I figured they'd at least be happy. If that jerk had anything to do with what happened to Giles...

I noticed the Look Willow was giving me and put those thoughts out of my mind for now. "I'm sorry about Giles."

"Why? It's not your fault." she sat down across from my desk. "I just think maybe now it's time to stop being so selfish, get over yourself and go visit Buffy."

"Selfish?"

"She needs you, Angel. She's missed you."

"It's been three years, Willow. Three *long* years in which alot has happened."

"You can say that again," I heard her mutter. "It's been three years, and, surprise, surprise, she still needs you!" she walked over to my desk and slammed her fists down, shaking my computer. She glared at me with eyes that looked ready to stake me.

"Angel.....Angelus....okay, so I don't know your last name, but darnit, you listen to me! For three years, I have watched my best friend suffer from losing you. I've watched Giles live in the same house and sleep in a separate room because even though she was married to him, she still loved you. I've watched her soul start to slowly slip away while you hang out here saving and helping people. What about Buffy?"

"What about her?" When her eyes flared, I realized now was *not* the time to play stupid. Too late now.

"She needs help too!"

There was no way out, I could see it. I was gonna have to bend to Willow's will or wind up dust on top of the desk that Cordelia would brush away with a Swiffer cloth in the morning.

"You're selfish," Willow said flatly. "A selfish....man! That's *all* you are Angel."

"I'm not a man."

"You look like one. And you smell like one." she shrugged.

I glanced at her for a hint of a smile but she still looked serious. Sighing, I stood up and walked over to the elevator.

"Where are you going?"

"To get my duster."

"It's warm out. You'll be fine. Come on."

Willow may be small, but in the years I'd been away she'd gotten unbelievably strong. She grabbed me by the collar of my shirt and drug me outside, shoving me into the passenger seat of her Jeep. I should've known that eventually, Buffy would send Willow for me. She knew the Witch wouldn't hesitate to stake me if I didn't comply. That girl is just too damn smart.

"Don't talk," she warned me as she got into the driver's side. She started up the car and began singing Offspring songs. This was going to be a *long* two hours.


*****


A funeral is a terrible thing to try and plan. There's flowers and music and God, the casket. Xander is handling alot of it for me, thank goodness. I don't know what I would do without him. I could deal without his girlfriend the former demon, but Xander is the best.

Willow was supposed to be getting us a pizza, and she's been gone all day. Not that I'm hungry, but I have other people to think about here. It's almost nine p.m. now. I should get--

The doorbell disturbed me, making me lose my place in the Rolodex Giles always kept on my mother's desk. So much for trying to find the name of Giles' accountant.


*****


I've never been so nervous in my life. Of a *doorbell*. I am the height of pathetic.

Willow sped off as soon as she dumped me here. She's drove me crazy the whole way here and she knows it. She probably thinks I deserve it. I probably do.

I feel like I need to be here though, like Buffy was calling for me to come and Willow just happened to be the one who picked up the phone. That may be an entirely corny, soap opera esque thought, but it's true.


*****


Who on Earth would ring the bell? Willow and Xander both have keys to my home, and I rarely see Cordelia or--

Spike.

It has to be him. I can sense the whole fang thing.

"Me!" Fiona said as she came running down the stairs in her Winnie the Pooh nightgown. "Me door!"

"No, Fiona, it's late, let--"

But it was too late. Fiona had already swung the door open.


*****


I expected Buffy to answer the door with tears in her eyes and mascara down her cheeks.

Instead, a beautiful little girl with bright green eyes and a mass of brunette curls stood there, watching me through the screen.

"Hi," she said happily. "Who are you?"

"I'm a friend of Buffy Summers. Is she here?"

"Mommy!" she called. MOMMY?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

"Is Uncle Spike teasing you a--" Buffy stopped dead when she saw me. "Angel?"

"Mommy, who he?" the little girl asked.

Again, MOMMY??!?!?!?!?!?!?!

"His name is Angel," Buffy said. "Isn't that a pretty name?"

The little girl nodded, making her curls bounce.

I leaned down to her level and met her eyes, which watched me with curiosity. "What's your name?" I asked her, still confused as to whose daughter she was.

"Fiona," she whispered, still watching me.

Buffy put an arm around the little child as she clung to her mother. She picked her up and opened the screen door for me to come in. "Fiona Jocelyn Summers."

No. It couldn't be.

"I didn't know you had a little sister." I know it sounded stupid, but I wasn't about to jump to the obvious conclusion.

"She's my mommy!" Fiona said, giggling.


*****


"I think we should talk." Buffy waited for me to enter the house all the way and close the doors, then she headed for the living room.

She set Fiona down on the couch and handed her a Barbie doll. "Can you play in here for a few minutes while Mommy makes some tea?"

"Eeew!" she giggled. "Okay!"

"Thanks, baby." Buffy kissed her before leading me into the kitchen.

"Tea?" I questioned.

"Giles rubbed off on me, I guess." she shrugged. "It's so strange not having him around."

"Does Fiona know where her father is?" I asked. "I mean--"

"No, she doesn't know where he is." Buffy snapped.  "Why's that?"


*****


I glared at him. "You tell me."

"I don't know what you're talking about."

God, the way he always plays games with matters of the heart infuriates me to NO end. "You KNOW what I'm talking about, Angel. Did you not look at her? She looks just like you!"

"Buffy, I--"

"November, 1999. Thanksgiving weekend. I came into your office, you killed a demon, became human, shagged me silly for two days and then gave it all up to save my life?"

"You remember."

"Of course I remember. How stupid do you think I am?"

"But--"

"But nothing. I guess maybe since I was pregnant, things changed. Who knows? Anyway, when I found out, Mom had a cow. She practically disowned me, then she winds up leaving the house to me. AND Giles. Can you believe that?

"So we got married." I sat down and began playing with the celestial placemats. "I didn't really want to, but there wasn't much other option. I mean, pregnant teenager is bad enough, but pregnant Slayer? Giles moved in and he took care of Fiona for me while I was patrolling. She never called him 'Dada' or anything like that, it was always 'Gampa'. She started it on her own and we left it that way.

"Now that he's gone....I feel like a parentless child and not a widow. It wasn't that kind of marriage Angel," I added quickly for his benefit. "We never consummated things, it just wasn't like that. He was in love with Willow and I.....you know who I'm in love with."


*****


"This Riley person, right?"

She burst out laughing. "Riley? How do you even know about Riley?"

"Cordelia. She and Oz talk about things all the time and I overhear."

"Oz. I haven't seen him in over a year, how was he?"

"From what I can tell, good."

"He and Cordelia seem happy."

I shrugged. "Hard to tell with those two. But they do their own thing. They're actually not together that much. I assume Oz gets all his Sunnydale gossip from Devon."

Buffy nodded. "I still can't believe....him and Willow..." she shrugged. "We're off topic, Angel."

"What would you like to talk about?"

"Whether or not you plan on taking part in the raising of our daughter at all."


*****


Ha! Handle that question with your suave attitude, Angel.

"Buffy, I don't know what to say to you."

"I'm sorry would be a start. I'm sorry for leaving in the first place. I'm sorry I let other people talk me into leaving you. I'm sorry I listened to your mother."

Just as I wanted, his eyes widened. "How do you know about that?"

"Mom told me, shortly before she died. I guess she wanted all the air cleared before she left." I shrugged. "That was pretty dumb of you, you know."

"Dumb of me?!" he demanded.

"Yes, dumb of you."


*****


"Where do you get off?"

"Oh, Angel, COME ON! The only good thing that came out of your leaving Sunnydale is Fiona. The whole damn town has fallen apart you know. I'm not Slaying nearly as well as I used to. Thank GOD Fiona isn't to be a Slayer. Giles wanted her to be a Watcher though, so I may look into that."

She's beautiful. Just beautiful. With her hair in a haphazard ponytail and her tank top and boxers, she's the most gorgeous woman there ever was.

"Mommy?" Fiona came into the room sucking her thumb. "Why you yell?"

"I wasn't yelling, sweetheart." she reached her arms out and put Fiona on her lap when she toddled over. "Angel and I were just talking loudly."

"Why?"

"Well, sometimes you have to talk loudly to make a point."

"Why?"


*****


I sighed. "Because Angel wasn't understanding what I was trying to say and I didn't know any other way to get my point across."

"What?" she asked. God, is she nosy for a two and a half year old.

"Well, I think that Angel should move into the house and take care of us. How would you feel about that?"

"Okay," she said, then she wriggled to get down.


*****


"You want down?" Buffy asked.

"Yeah, yeah."

Buffy lifted her off and she ran right up to me.

"Up, up," she said, patting my knees.

I couldn't remember the last time I'd lifted a child, but I picked her up and sat her in my lap anyway. She looked at me with those beautiful wide eyes and smiled.

"Hi," she said happily.

"Hi, baby."

"I think I'm gonna leave you two alone for a minute." Buffy said. She left the room, and I panicked.

"You love Mommy?" she asked me.

"Yes, very much."

She threw her little arms around me and hugged me as tightly as a toddler could. "'Ere," she motioned for me to lean closer to her. I did and she cupped her hand around my ear and whispered, "Be my daddy?"

I'm not sure if my heart swelled or broke. I kissed her forehead. "Of course I will."

Fiona clapped her hands together and laughed. "Mommy!"

Buffy came back in with her hair now fixed and held back by a headband. "What is it, Fiona?"

"My daddy," she said seriously, patting my hand with hers.

"See how smart she is?" Buffy asked.

"Fiona, can I talk to your mother alone a minute?"


*****


She looked to me for an answer and I laughed. "You're gonna have to start listening to your father now too, Fiona." I told her.

"Bye, Daddy." she said before sticking her thumb back in her mouth and going back into the living room.

"I do want you to stay," I told him. "It's obvious that Fiona feels a connection to you, and that's great, but you can't come into her life and make her love you and then leave. I won't put her through that."

"I have no intentions of leaving, Buffy."

"Good," I smiled at him. "Because Cordelia is already having your stuff packed up and Oz is dropping it by tomorrow."

"Oh really?"

"Uh-huh. You can stay in Giles' room for awhile."

"For how long?"

I grinned. "Until I decide to forgive you for sending me back to Sunnydale three years ago."


//She flies from a blinding light

And spirals to my heart

I try to find my mind

But don't know where to start


Won't ever

Can't ever find my sanity

Won't ever

Can't ever 'til I hear

Her calling for me


She knows that, she knows that

She knows that, she knows that

She knows that side of me

Can't help it, can't help it

Can't help it, can't help it

Can't help that side of me

I'm lost in a thousand nights

But sun shines at my feet

I'd walk through a thousands fires

And next to me she'd be

Won't ever

Can't ever find my sanity

Won't ever

Can't ever til I hear

Her calling for me


She knows that side

She's calling back for me

I've lost my mind

I'd never believed

She knows that side

She's calling back for me

I lost my mind

Til she's calling for me\\