Cell Phone Confessional
A/N: Just a little one shot that I thought of while writing Unexpected Affair.
Ok, ladies, think back to the last time you had a major love life crisis. Wh-whatever it was…just think back for me. What was one of the first things you did? Uh, huh…that's right…you called up your home girl and told her the whole thing didn't you?
Not that I'm downing you or nothin! I'm just saying that's a natural reaction for a girl. It doesn't matter if your boy just did something fabulous for you or just broke your heart, you were walking down the street and saw the love of your life walking the other way, or you saw your ex with some bimbo with a skimpy waist and large boobs and you could have sworn it was a real-life Barbie. The first reaction is to whip out the cell phone and call up your girl and be like:
"Oh my God, you will not believe this."
Sigh yea…I bet that's nice. Not only being able to call up a girl to talk to…but having a girl friend to call.
See…that was my problem. Some of you ladies may know who I am, most of you probably don't, and some of you have your eyes widening in shock because you just realized that I'm not a little boy. Ha.
Well if you don't know who I am, my name is Noodle. Yes, Noodle. For some odd reason people are under the impression that that is my name because it was the only word I knew in English. Uh…no. I couldn't speak a damn word of English when I was shipped to Kong Studios and yes I was shipped in a FedEx crate. Let's not get into that now.
Anyway like I was trying to say earlier…my problem was that I didn't have any girl friends to call up and talk to or to hang out with or whatever girls do together.
I mean…I live with three grown ass men for God's sake. None of them really give a damn about my girl problems and if they do…well that's just fatherly concern coming from Russel and he doesn't really count in this situation.
So after I turned seventeen and got my license and a car, I decided to start going to the mall to look for some friends that were girls.
Ha, yea right. Russel had issues with me not being on the same floor with him at all times, do you really think he was going to let me actually go somewhere without him? Not a chance. And in case you didn't already figure this out…Murdoc and 2D bought me my first car against strict orders from Russel that I shouldn't be given the opportunity to go anywhere alone.
Ok so my first car was…oh shit what was it called? …….Buick! That's right…it was an American made car from like…the eighties? Yea, a 1989 Buick Century. That poor thing had definitely seen better days. Murdoc had put the title under my name and ironically I was the second owner and the car hadn't been painted since it'd left the factory.
2D called it vintage and Murdoc called it cheap…so the two put together gave me the primer blue tank from the eighties. Ok, well, not that I'm trying to impress a girl or anything cause I don't swing that way if you catch my drift…BUT…I didn't really want to be seen in that piece of shit. And ladies…it was a piece of SHIT!
So my first order of business before making friends was to go behind my band mates backs and sell the car. I mean…I do have money and I could have bought my own car and I had been planning to until Murdoc and 2D "surprised" me with that…thing.
Ok so I sold the car and got like…eighteen hundred American dollars for it (I'd sold it to an American tourist that was looking for a car for his daughter who had just gotten her license. I actually feel bad selling him that car, plus the fact that she probably hates me now).
I thought this was a lot of money, but I went to the bank to convert it into pounds and it was literally nine hundred and seventy four pounds. That wasn't really a whole lot for me…
So, since I wanted to look cool and have a nicer first car I did probably the girliest and dumbest thing ever.
I bought a Corvette.
Ha ha…and you know…you think I'd be kicking myself for it since it almost took all of my seven years worth of savings to buy…but I really love this damn car!
It's a black 2002 Chevy Corvette Z06 Coupe. This stupid thing was faster than I could handle but I got the hang of it after a few "almosts" if you catch my drift.
And you can bet your ass that Russel, Murdoc and 2D pitched a fit. A royal fit.
I don't think they were upset at the fact that I sold the car they bought me, but more at the fact that a girl was driving a hot car and they weren't. Don't get me wrong…Russel was mad about the whole thing, but Muds and 2D were just jealous, because Murdoc only has his Winnebago and the Geep and 2D has a Toyota Camry that's falling to pieces.
Ha ha well anyway, to make a long story short I quickly started escaping Kong Studios to go to the mall to meet up with some friends. I went to some girly places since I figured that'd be an obvious place to look.
I had walked into Victoria's Secret, thinking that mostly women shopped here. Well…I was right and wrong. There were women in there…but they worked there. There were predominantly men in there shopping for their wives, girlfriends or a favorite prostitute. Yea…I overheard some guy admitting that to a sales clerk. Creepy.
So, I bought some thong panties since I had started into that part of my girly development and quickly walked out of the store before I was recognized and asked to pose in something.
I spotted a clothing store called Forever 21 and walked inside, gathering that its merchandise was geared towards people my age…or 21.
This…was probably my worst experience in shopping for friends.
Clearly I was trying way too hard to make friends. All I found in this store were these blond ditzes with little puppies in their purses. Who the hell carries a miniature dog around in their purse!
Suddenly I realized that carrying around keys to a Corvette only worked on guys and that girls, especially dumb ones, didn't really care what I was driving. So clearly, I was going about this the wrong way.
I almost ran out of that I. Q. damaging death trap and headed to the closest "Noodle sanctuary" I could find…a music store.
I walked in and was instantly in heaven. Not only was it your run of the mill CD and cassette buying store…it was also a vintage record store; they bought, repaired and sold oldies records.
I almost fainted. Noodle LOVES records.
So I did a beeline to the corner of the store devoted to records and started shopping around. I immediately picked up The Doors record and hug it to my chest, a stupid grin on my face.
"That's a good one. I love The Doors," I heard a voice say.
I turned my head to see a girl about my height with brown hair and brown eyes and a friendly smile on her face. She had a lanyard around her neck with a tag on it that said:
Vintage Music & More
Ok, so she worked here. I smiled back at her and nodded, "Yea, they're my idols. I also love The Beatles but I haven't found that one yet."
Her eyes widened as did her smile, "Me too! Follow me, The Beatles are over here."
I followed her to the next aisle over to a section strictly devoted to British bands from the past to present. My eyes widened and my jaw went slack.
Every single album ever made by The Beatles stood right in front of my on the shelf.
"Holy shit…" I whispered.
Marissa chuckled at my reaction, "Our own citizens kind of fell out of love with them so a lot of people sold us their records and now we have the entire collection. Mainly we get tourists in here who are interested in buying them. I think there's actually one that's signed by them too."
I shoved The Doors album carefully under my arm and picked up one of each album that had been made. Shifting all of them in my arms I turned to her and smiled wide.
"Thank you so much, you have no idea how much this means to me! Their music helped make me a better guitarist."
Marissa smiled and quirked an eyebrow, "You play guitar?"
I nodded, "As long as I can remember."
She nodded with a "ha" and scanned the albums on the shelf next to us. I saw her eyes do a double take on a particular album and noticed that it was the Gorillaz first album that was made into a record.
Marissa looked from the album to me, back to the album and then back to me. She pointed at the album, her eyebrow rising again.
"You're…you're Noodle? The guitarist from Gorillaz?"
I shifted the albums again and nodded with a small smile. She grinned and stuck out her hand to me.
"Holy shit is right! I'm Marissa, it's great to meet you!"
It was my turn to laugh at her reaction, "Likewise Marissa."
She leaned against the shelf staring at me, a smile on her face, "Well I'll be damned. I don't think we've ever had a celebrity in here before. Can I help you get anything else? We have a ton of records dude, I mean literally everything."
Before I could answer I noticed something odd about her. For some reason she didn't seem to quite fit into her surroundings.
The light bulb buzzed on in my head and I grinned. Her accent, she wasn't from around here.
"Um, sure but, if you don't mind me asking, where are you from? You don't sound like you're from anywhere in England."
She smiled and motioned for me to follow her, leading me to another aisle of good records, "I'm from America. My dad's military and he's stationed here for a few more years."
I nodded my head, "I see, is you're family moving back to the states soon?"
She nodded her head too, "My dad's anxious to get back to the states. But I think I want to stay here. I'm majoring in Music Theory and I'm in love with this store so I don't really want to leave."
My phone vibrated and rang before I could answer. I tried to free one of my hands from all the records I had but they kept slipping out of my hands.
"Shit," I muttered.
Marissa grabbed the records from me, "Here, answer your phone."
"Thanks," I pulled my phone out of my pocket, my keys coming out as well and falling to the floor, Marissa bending down to pick them up before I could reach them.
I glanced at the caller and cursed aloud…Russel.
I flipped open my phone and put on the cheery Noodle voice, "Hey Russ, how are you?"
"Noods, ya been gone for over an hour! Where are ya!"
I rolled my eyes at Marissa who was giggling from the shouting coming out of my phone, "I'm fine Russel, I just stopped by a music store for a little bit. I'm on my way home."
Russel sighed on the other end of the line, "Damnit Noodle, you're a target because you're famous and because of that damn car yo' drivin'!"
"Is that it? I figured it was because I was pretty," Marissa and I made eye contact and both burst out laughing and I heard Russel growl on the other end of the phone.
"Don't joke with me, Noodle. Come home now before I come out there."
"Ok, Russ I will. Love you."
I heard him sigh again, this time from relief. Those two little words always turned him into butter, "Love you too baby girl. Be safe."
"Always will. Bye."
"Bye," I snapped my phone shut, stuffing it in my pocket and looking at Marissa who was inspecting my car keys.
"Damn, you drive a Corvette? I'd kill something for one of those," she said handing me back my keys and selection of records.
I shrugged off the comment, "It was the one "celebrity thing" that I decided to do," I glanced at my watch and sighed, "Well, Big Daddy Russ wants me to go home now."
Marissa bit her lip nervously, "Hey, um…I know this is cheesy and you probably get this everywhere you go, but…would you and the rest of your band sign an album for me? It would mean an awful lot to me especially since I've met you and all."
"Yea, sure. Which one?" I asked, walking around with her to the aisle that had the first album and Demon Days on it. She glanced at both of them and shoved her hand into her back pocket, pulling out forty pounds with a sigh. The albums were fifty pounds each.
"Shit, I guess I'll have to get a rain check on that. I don't get a paycheck until next Friday."
I shrugged and picked up two of each album, "Don't sweat it, I'll take care of it."
Her eyes widened and she shook her head, "No, no I couldn't accept Noodle, that's too generous of you."
I shook my head, "It's the least I can do since…since you've treated me like a person and not a hot shot celebrity. I really appreciate that."
She sighed, staring at the albums in my arms, "I'll pay you back, I promise."
"Whatever, you can try."
She raised an eyebrow at the stack in my arms, "Why are you buying two of each?" she asked.
"'cause I don't have a copy of our albums in a record," I said matter-of-factly.
She shrugged and led me over to the counter where I paid for the albums I had and the ones I was buying for her. I guess being a celebrity did things to your head, I didn't really see what I was doing as a big deal but it meant something to her.
She wrapped each album individually and bagged them carefully so they wouldn't break. After handing me the bags and my change she smiled gratefully.
"Thank you for stopping by Noodle, and I really appreciate you buying the albums for me. I am gona pay you back no matter what you say."
I smiled, a thought crossing my mind that interested me, "Tell you what," I said, "hang out with me sometime and I'll forget about the albums, eh?"
She cocked her head to the side, "Hang out with you? Are you sure?"
I shrugged, "Why the hell not? I live with three men and hardly encounter someone of the same sex…ever. I could use a friend that could level with me. Plus the fact that you're not a groupie and you're normal works in your favor."
She smiled and took out a sheet of paper writing down her number and I told her mine. And this…ladies was the start of my first, real friendship with another girl.
That was four years ago. Now Marissa has an a apartment in Essex less than a mile away from Kong Studios with two autographed Gorillaz albums framed on her wall. We go to bars together and clubs, she's met my family/friends/band mates and they're pretty much used to her being over at this point or me missing and winding up at her place. It took a while for Murdoc to stop hitting on her, but he got the hint eventually.
What's best of all though, now she and I both have a best friend we can call when that love life crisis occurs.
And ironically, my crisis happened like a freight train hitting a car: instantly. You'd think it would have been gradual because of the…circumstances, but no. It hit me like a ton of bricks. Let me tell you 'bout it and believe me…this is something all women can relate to one way or another.
Marissa sat up in her bed and rubbed her face to wake up, "Yea, girl i's me. What's up Noods?"
Noodle started pacing the distance of her room, staying as far away from the locked door as possible.
She sighed, "Dude, I am never getting drunk again. Do you hear me? Never. Again."
Marissa scooted back in her bed to lean against the wall, "What happened?"
Noodle raked her hand through her matted hair, her pacing getting faster, "I…damnit I just realized something, Riss. And I feel so stupid for it."
Marissa frowned, "Tell me about it. What happened?"
Noodle stopped her movements momentarily and sighed, "Riss…I think I love 2D."
Lanky arms swung lazily by thin legs as the shirtless, boxer-clad, blue haired singer thudded down a corridor towards the kitchen. He had a scowl on his face that would scare a stranger into rehab, but the residents of Kong were used to this look. It wasn't common, but they knew what it meant when it showed up.
This was 2D's, "why the fuck am I up at ten in the morning on a Saturday" look. Patented and copyrighted, it was his alone since he was the only that could successfully pull it off.
He couldn't fathom for the life of him why he was awake. He'd gotten drunk last night hadn't he? Don't people usually pass out and wake up forty eight hours later after a night like that? The singer wiped a hand under his nose and sniffed, entering the doorway to the kitchen.
He cursed aloud. Not even Russel was awake and he was always the first one up every morning. 2D clunked his head against the fridge, opening the bottom half and crinkling his nose while examining what few edible contents the fridge had.
Pulling out a beer he kicked the fridge shut and plopped down on a kitchen stool, scratching his boxer clad crotch. Images from last night appeared in the singer's brain, but he couldn't quite peace it together. Shrugging, he opened the can and took a long swig of the heavenly juice. Maybe if he drank more he'd pass out again and get a few more hours of sleep.
Slowly, black eyes glanced around to take in his surroundings. Kitchen. He didn't want to pass out in the kitchen. That was bad.
Standing with great effort, the singer moped out of the kitchen and past the corridor to the lift.
"Riss…I think I love 2D."
Whooa horsey! Back that shit up and park it!
2D stopped and poked his head into the doorway of the corridor where that sentence had come from. He was fully awake now; eyes wide and fully aware that no amount of medication in the world could have fucked up that sentence as it entered into his brain. He heard it, loud and clear.
He glanced down the hallway at the two rooms that stood opposite each other: Russel's room and Noodle's room.
The gears took a while to start turning, but eventually the wheels started spinning in 2D's head and he deduced that the outrageous confession he had just heard must have come from Noodle's room. Right?
He bit his lip, one part of his conscience telling him to hightail his hung over ass over there and listen for more, the other, not so retarded half telling him to wise up and go downstairs so he could drink more and sleep less. Wait…
2D shook his head because he was thinking too much and thoughts were starting to get backwards in his head. He crept slowly down the corridor, beer in hand, and walked past the guitarist's door to lean against the wall next to it, his head on the door frame so he could listen.
Marissa's brown eye's widened and her jaw fell open at what Noodle had just said to her. Slowly…her mind tried to register anything that had happened last night that would make the Japanese guitarist think this. Nothing had come to mind yet due to the fact that she was slightly hung over.
"Wha…what do you mean Noods?" she stuttered.
Noodle sighed, "Do you remember what happened last night? At Club Bamba?" 2D's ears perked up at this since he didn't remember and he hoped Marissa didn't either. Then he frowned, scrunching up his brow, they had gone to a club?
"Actually no I don't so if you remember than by all means tell…wait a minute, how the hell do you remember? You drank more than anybody!" Marissa questioned.
Noodle rolled her eyes, "Riss, trust me, realizations will do that to you. I was hung over for about two minutes before this shit hit me like a ton of bricks," 2D stared at the door with a scowl, was she unhappy about loving him?
Marissa yawned, "Ok, so tell me what happened. Detail on what made you realize this."
Noodle started pacing again, 2D listening to her footsteps in anticipation to her voice, "Ok, well, it was just you, 2D, and me at the club. For whatever reason Murdoc and Russel didn't go. But anyway, the three of us kind of alternated between the dance floor and the bar, mostly the bar, until that cute guy you met at the movies came up to you and took you off to the dance floor. Remember that?"
Marissa grinned, the pleasant memory coming to her none to slowly. She looked at her palm and then the one that was holding the phone and grinned, "Yea, I got his number on my hand. What was his name again?"
Noodle shook her head, "I have no idea, Riss. Anyway, so it was just 2D and me and by that time both of us were pretty lit. So this is what he did Riss…he laced his fingers with mine and took me to the dance floor! Did you hear me! He laced his fingers into mine!"
2D cocked his head to the side as the memory slowly came back to him. The guy's name was Terrence although 2D didn't know why he remembered that and him grabbing Noodle's hand didn't seem all that big of a deal to him. He was just being affectionate.
"Wow," Marissa said, "has he ever done that before?"
"No! Never before, I'm positive," Noodle said, examining a poster on her wall before turning around and pacing the other way.
"Ha…so what happened next?" she asked.
"Well," Noodle said using her hands to gesture, "we started dancing together, I remember seeing you and saying something about it although I don't know what, and then suddenly our bodies were a lot closer than before, Riss."
Marissa quirked and eyebrow and grinned, "How close babe?"
Noodle sighed and 2D pressed his hand further into the doorframe, wondering what she was about to say next. The memory came back to him and he smiled, his loins tingling slightly at the thought. 2D shook his head, this was Noodle! He couldn't think about her like that.
Then the gears started turning again…wait for it…wait for it…
Wasn't she thinking about him the same way? Or at least that she loved him?
"Riss…stuff was touching. Intimate stuff," 2D's eyes widened again and the tingle in his loins turned into a full blown nerve cluster fuck. Oh yea, he clenched his teeth nervously, he remembered that now, he had started that close proximity stunt.
Marissa's mouth dropped open again for the second time that morning and she smiled, "Are you serious!"
"Yes I'm serious! Dude…we were dirty dancing!" she screeched silently.
2D tried his hardest not to snort and laugh at that last exclamation. He understood perfectly well that when it came to having a crush, every minute thing that a man does is a big deal, but that didn't mean hearing her talk about it wasn't funny.
Marissa thudded her head back against the wall with a smile on her face, clenching the phone with her hand, "That is absolutely hysterical! You two need to get drunk more often! Did you like it at least?"
Noodle snorted, "Duh, I liked it. Who the hell wouldn't? I mean, I personally think he's gorgeous."
2D grinned and did a little dance in his place. She thought he was gorgeous! And she liked the "dirty dancing" last night!
Marissa chuckled, "That's just awesome," she said, grabbing her remote and turning on her stereo, DARE coming on the radio. She turned the volume down so Noodle wouldn't get distracted.
Noodle sighed, "Then a slow song came on and, of course, our bodies got even closer, Riss. It was so sweet, he had his arms around my waist, hugging me and I had to stand on my tip toes just to put my arms around his neck, my head lying on his chest and he had his face in my hair."
2D smiled at the thought, remembering how good her hair had smelled against the pungent odor of the club that consisted of stale beer, cigarettes and body odor. She had smelled nice. And he had enjoyed holding her like that.
Marissa giggled, "That is so amazing, Noods! What happened next?"
"Well, we weren't really even slow dancing, Riss. We were just standing there holding each other and when the song ended…sigh…he grabbed my chin and gently pulled my face so I was facing him and said—"
2D's eyes widened…he remembered what he'd said before she even said it. He had told her that she was perfect…she was beautiful, and that he couldn't imagine living life without her and then…
"…and then he leaned in and kissed me!" Noodle squealed out loud.
Marissa's widened as much as they possible could, her mouth dropping. Noodle was her best friend. There was no doubt about that. She had always suspected that something might go on between the singer and the guitarist…but she had figured it would be later on in life.
"No. Fucking. Way," Marissa gasped.
Noodle nodded excitedly even though she knew her friend could not see her while outside her door 2D slapped his forehead for not remembering such a drastic move on his part. He wasn't sure what this meant because he hadn't really planned on making a move on the guitarist…ever. Not that he didn't like her…he just hadn't thought about it.
"How was it!" Marissa squealed.
Calm enough to discontinue her pacing, Noodle flopped down onto her futon, a goofy grin plastered on her face, "Riss, remember that guy that I kissed at the mall…and I said I wanted to marry him because he was such a good kisser?"
2D's eyes widened again and he scowled at the door. She'd kissed someone before him? Russel wasn't going to like that…
The singer blinked. Maybe he shouldn't tell Russel...yea.
"Oh yea," Marissa said, crossing her legs, "he was a cutie."
"Yea…'D's at least twenty times better than that guy. I mean…this boy can kiss," Noodle sighed.
2D grinned, his chest puffing out a little bit. So she liked out he kissed, eh? Not bad, Stuart…not bad at all. Maybe it's ok to make a move since she's not entirely freaked out about last night.
"No fucking way! Better than that other guy? You went on about him for weeks!" Marissa exclaimed.
"Yea, I know. But see here's the thing…" Noodle said sitting up and crossing her legs.
2D winced, shit here we go.
"…I don't know if he did that because we were both drunk or if he really feels that way."
2D almost shouted at the door that he meant it with all his heart. He really did like her but wasn't gutsy enough to do ask.Marissa thought about it for a moment. 2D wasn't the type to do something irrational and not have an explanation. He wasn't Murdoc.
"Just ask him, Noods. I don't think 'D's the type to do something like that and not mean it. What's the worst that could happen?"
"Uh, he could admit that it's cause he was drunk and I could kill myself?" 2D shook his head outside the door, a plan formulating slowly but surely in his head. He checked his wrist for a watch and then checked a clock on the wall. Ten thirty. Perfect.
Marissa snorted, "Have a little faith, Noods. Just ask him."
Noodle sighed, "You're right Riss, I think I'll ask him to breakfast or something and talk it over food. I always feel better talking about shit if there's food in front of me."
Marissa laughed, "Food to throw?"
Noodle laughed out loud, "Nah, food to eat."
Suddenly there was a knock on her door and Noodle jumped, her brow scrunching in confusion, when had someone come down the hall?
"'ey little love! I's me, 2D."
Noodle's eyes widened and her mouth dropped open as her heart leapt into her throat. He was standing right outside her door!
Marissa did the same thing on the other line, having heard the knock and 2D's voice, "Holy shit, Noods. Just stay calm and talk to him."
"Be right there, 'D! Ok Riss, I'll call you later."
"You better! I wana hear all about this!"
Noodle laughed, "Ok, bye."
"Bye," and the two hung up the phone. Noodle stood and shakily walked over to her door, unlocking it and opening it marginally.
Her eyes widened at 2D, who was standing in front of her door wearing only his boxers and a beer can in his hand, somewhat full.
He smiled at her, "'ey love."
She smiled back, quirking an eyebrow, "Hey 2D, what're you doing," she said, stepping back so he could come into her room.
He shrugged, "Woke up early fo' some reason and came up 'ere to get a beer, I 'eard yo' voice so I figured yo' were awake. I thought we could go to breakfast somethin'," he said smiling.
Noodle's face paled as he said he heard her voice, "What did you hear," she asked before she could stop herself.
He shrugged, scanning her room, "Somethin' 'bout food so I figured yo' were 'ungry," he said.
Noodle smiled, "Uh, yea breakfast would be great. I just need to get changed."
He smiled and took a step towards her, smiling. She smiled back, trying to swallow the lump that formed in her throat without being obvious. He raised one hand to her face, caressing her cheek with his thumb, Noodle sighed, leaning into his hand.
"D'yo' rememba las' night, love?" he asked softly, staring into her eyes. She nodded, staring back into his beautiful black eyes.
"Rememba wha' I said?" he whispered, leaning closer to her face.
She nodded again.
He leaned into her face until their foreheads were touching and smiled, rubbing his nose with hers.
"I meant it."
Noodle's eyes widened, her lips parting slightly in shock. Before she could respond, 2D dipped is head down and lightly captured her lips with his softly.
Noodle gasped into the kiss and then slowly shut her eyes, welcoming his lips with hers. She snaked her arms around his neck, raking her fingers through his hair on the back of his neck. He gently pushed his tongue into her mouth, not needing an invitation since her lips were parted welcomingly.
He wrapped his arms around her waist, his hands pressing on the small of her back, pushing her into his half-naked body. He massaged her tongue tenderly with his own, Noodle responding with a sweet massage of her own. He didn't notice last night, but she tasted sweet. He wasn't sure if it was something she ate or if it was natural, but he enjoyed the taste of her.
They broke the kiss together, their foreheads automatically coming together with a gentle thump. He winked at her with a smile, his thumbs rubbing circles into her lower back.
"Be wit' me?" he asked quietly.
Noodle nodded with a smiled, "Always, 'D."
He smiled back at her and kissed her gently on the lips again before leaving her room to go get changed for breakfast, closing the door behind him.
Noodle stared at the door her best frien—boyfriend had just exited. Her face split into a large grin and she snatched up her phone, pressing the number two for speed dial.
"Shit that was fast…" Marissa said on the other line.
Noodle grinned, "Oh, my God…guess what!"