RATING: G
GENRE: Angst
MAJOR CHARACTERS: Shindou Shuichi, Yuki Eiri.
DISCLAIMER: This is mere fiction, and I do not make any profit out of it one way or another. The characters belong to the respected manga-ka.
SUMMARY: Shuichi finally understands why Yuki is not there. Angst. OneShot Drabble
COPYRIGHT: © November 2005

Never Loved
By mitmiya


My heart feels heavy, as though it has fallen down and can't get back to its place, and is beating frantically like a drum. I place a hand over my chest, right where it rests and try to will it to slow down, but as my wide eyes take in the sight before me, I knew it is a goal not to be achieved.

These legs feel heavy, too, and I struggle as I try to move closer to you, my feet stomping the ground but not leaving any tracks as my numb body crosses the distance that is between the both of us, a distance that should have never been. The hand clutches my chest tightly and I bite my lip, my pace speeding up as people move in the opposite direction, not even glancing at me.

Once I reach the place, I collapse on the ground, my knees hitting the soft dirt beneath me and I crawl closer, placing one hand on the cold stone, and I chuckle wearily; even your tombstone is cold, Yuki. My chuckle turn into a harsh sob, and I throw myself over the marker, hugging it and wishing it was you in my arms.

After all these years of loneliness, after all these years of haunting you after my death, why did you leave me, Yuki. Why aren't you beside me now, holding me in your arms as rest of the world is oblivious to us; two lost souls meant to be together even after the cease of their existence in the living world?

I knew the reason already, but it hurt to admit to myself what you tried to prove to me all along.

You never loved me.