Disclaimer: I don't own 'em, I just like to make 'em dance!
A/N: Because people asked for it, this is the sequel to "No Regrets". Enjoy the cavity causing sweetness!
Tears and Tea
He smiled at her when the kiss ended and his brushed a lock of hair behind her ear and cupped her face in his palm.
"Are you sure you're alright with all of this?" He whispered.
"Why wouldn't I be?" She half laughed.
"It is an awful lot to find out in one morning." He smiled.
She shrugged and grinned.
"But it's all good news and when the news is good, the more you have the better." She grinned.
"And you're not angry…?"
"About…the bite…and well, the pregnancy?"
"I'll admit the bite wasn't that wonderful…but why should I be angry about it? You weren't quite yourself at the time and you've apologized profusely for it. It's in the past. And besides, I kind of like the shape of it…" She smiled and ran her fingers over her scar.
"And what about…?"
She smiled again.
"Why would I be anything but happy? I get to have a child with the man I love."
"It's just…it wasn't planned, it's so sudden…"
"The best things in life usually aren't planned, Remus." She giggled.
She was right. Life had a way of picking the oddest times to drop things into one's lap and those things, although untimely, were usually the greatest things life had to offer.
He blushed a bit. He hadn't planned it. And if he had, he most certainly would have planned it differently!
"Hey, it's okay…" She whispered and she wrapped her arms around him comfortingly.
"Nymphadora, you must believe when I say that I am sorry things happened the way they did. I never meant to…. I would have…. I never would have chosen for our first time to be as wolves…." He stammered.
She looked up at him and her eyes gleamed with unshed tears.
"I know…I know you would have done things differently." She smiled. "You would have romanced me and made the evening exceedingly lovely. You would have been a total gentleman and you would have gone out of your way to make the night special for me… But it was all of those things, even if things weren't quite as you would have liked." She smiled.
What? How could she say that? Gentleman? Lovely? Romanced? He hadn't been a gentleman. He hadn't even been a man! And romance? What could possibly have been romantic about being ravished by a wolf? Lovely….?
His doubt showed on his face.
"Just because we were wolves doesn't mean that we were incapable of those things Remus. You romanced me the way a wolf would, treated me as a kind wolf would, and I know you were being careful last night not to hurt me. You've told me just as much. So we weren't human. You couldn't have treated me better if we had been. We each got to see sides of each other that we'd never seen before- that makes it special."
He stared at her in shock for several seconds, absorbing her words and then he shook his head.
"How do you do that?"
"Always find a way to see what I do in a good light."
She grinned. "That's second nature to me."
He shook his head again.
"I'm sorry Nymphadora…."
"Don't. Please don't be… I…. I don't think I would change what happened between us, even if I got my hands on a Time Turner. I have no regrets about what happened, not even the way it happened."
A Time Turner…….? Hmm….. No! Don't even think it! She's happy with the way things are! Don't go messing things up!
He staid silent for a few moments and then chuckled.
"When did you decide to change your hair?"
"Hmm? I didn't…"
"But it's longer now and tawny colored. It's not your customary pink." He pointed out.
"I didn't change it. It was that color when I transformed back this morning."
His eyebrow quirked.
"Have you tried changing it?"
She shook her head.
"Didn't see a reason to. Does it look that awful?"
"No! Heaven's no. It just looks so…muted for you."
"A bit of change is a good thing. Maybe people will stop giving me such nasty looks next time I go into Diagon Alley." She grinned.
He brought his hand up and ran his fingers through her locks. Soft as silk and twice as pleasant against his skin. He loved her hair almost as much as her eyes- and that was quite a lot.
"Speaking of going, how long were you planning to stay here? This isn't exactly the warmest place to be in cooler weather." Personal experience had taught him that much.
"No idea really. I just… Well, I couldn't go to Grimmauld Place. It's far too noisy and there's always someone there milling about. And my apartment just… I don't know. It's definitely more quiet than Grimmauld, but then again, my neighbors are quite loud and the woman who lives downstairs would undoubtedly come up to visit and see why I didn't come home last night and…. Really, it was just much simpler to come here and escape for a little while."
"Do you think you are ready to leave?"
"And go where, exactly?"
"Well, back to your apartment for starters. You're still wearing the same clothes you wore yesterday. And you should eat something too." He smiled.
She eyed his curiously.
"You're not going to be one of those men who gets all out of shape about every little thing the pregnant woman does or doesn't do, are you?"
She really didn't need someone telling her what to do all the time. It was bad enough to go through childhood and adolescence. She didn't want to have another turn.
"No. I merely meant that the last time you ate was early yesterday evening. Surely you are at least a slight bit hungry by now?"
"Yeah, a little I guess…." She smiled.
"I promise, I won't turn into the 'pregnancy police'." He said.
"Remember you said that when I continue to go to the office and do work for the Order." She warned.
Worry flitted across his features for a moment and then he smiled and nodded. What else could he expect? That was who she was.
"Come on. We should get going." He said.
"All right…" She sighed.
He stood up and helped her from the bed and she looked up at him questioningly.
"Are we going to go into the village and call the Knight Bus or…?"
"Apparate, I think. Much quicker. And I do not think I could take another trip on that bus, even on an empty stomach."
"All right. I guess I'll see you in a few minutes then. "She smiled.
"Less than a few." He smiled back.
"Right then. See you soon." And with a grin she disapparated with a pop.
She apparated inside her apartment a few seconds later and sighed heavily. It was definitely not clean. Papers were scattered on the coffee table and a few books were on the floor. The pillows that were supposed to be on the furniture were piled on the floor by the hearth. And dirty dishes were stacked high in the kitchen sink.
Quickly, she pulled out her wand and began to tidy up. It was a great improvement. She smiled to herself at a job well done and shrugged out of her cloak and draped it over her desk chair and returned her wand to her pocket.
Odd… He should have been here by now….
There was a soft knock at the door and she quickly answered it.
"Wotcher Remus. Why didn't you just apparate inside?"
"It would have been rude…."
She rolled her eyes at that.
"But I was expecting you. It's not rude when you're expected. I was beginning to think something happened…."
"No, everything is fine. Besides, I thought you might want a few minutes to get settled before I came." And he gave her a knowing look.
She arched an eyebrow and shook her head.
"Well, are you going to come in, or are we going to stand in the doorway all day?"
He smiled and stepped over the threshold and she closed the door behind him.
"Make yourself at home. Um… I'm not great at making cocoa, but…."
He smiled at her. "It's a little early in the day for cocoa. Would you happen to have any tea?"
Relieved, she smiled back. "Tea it is then." And she went into the kitchen.
He followed her and sat down at the small table and chuckled.
"What?" She asked as she turned around, with the kettle in her hands.
"I didn't think your apartment would be this…organized. Quite surprising."
"I…um, I tidied up a bit…." She muttered.
He smiled at her but let the subject drop. He knew why she had cleaned up and he appreciated the thought, but it really didn't matter. He would have thought the apartment was just fine if it had been littered with papers and clothes. It would not have made him think any less of her. In fact, it made him think more of her. She wanted to make a good impression. It was rather sweet.
He got up and walked over to where she stood by the stove.
"Here, why don't I finish this and you can go freshen up?" He offered.
"Oh…okay… Um, the tea is in the top cabinet and the cups…."
"Go on. I'll manage." He smiled.
She left the kitchen and went into her room and closed the door.
Good Godric! What a morning this is turning out to be.
She slumped down on her bed and buried her face in her hands. How could all of this be happening? How could it be true?
He had finally kissed her! And he loved her! He'd actually said the words! And now….
She stood up and walked to her mirror and looked at her reflection. She looked the same as she had the day before, except for the crescent mark where her neck and shoulder met. And her hair, that was different too. But other than that….
But she didn't feel the same. Something was different. Her eyes began to focus on the reflection of her abdomen. Was that what was making her feel so different? The thought that she could be… But Remus had said that she was…
She didn't doubt him, but…
She pulled her wand out of her pocket and took a deep breath. She needed to know for sure.
The spell shot from her wand and wrapped around her middle in a silver mist. Almost instantly the mist changed and began to glow golden.
That answers that…
She ended the spell and the mist faded and disappeared.
Now she knew for sure. That was both a relief and unsettling. Now she knew, now she was….
She sat down on her bed again and let it all sink in. It had really happened. All of it was true.
And Remus was making tea in the kitchen.
She got up and went into the washroom through the bedroom entrance and quickly divested herself of her clothes and literally hopped into the shower.
His ears twitched when he heard he shower start.
The tea was ready, but it would have to wait.
It had taken a little while before he had heard the water begin the run. She must have been picking out her clothes or something….
Once her heard the shower being turned off he sighed. The tea was cold by now.
He began to reheat it and then walked into the other room and over to the washroom door and knocked.
The door opened and she stood before him wearing only a towel that was wrapped around her. Her hair was hanging in her face and dripping onto her shoulders and her skin was still damp. It was a very nice presentation, all things considered.
Wait, why am I looking!
"I'm sorry… my mind sort of wandered off for a few minutes. Is the tea ready?"
He nodded dumbly and lowered his eyes to the floor before he began to blush.
He had no right to look! He shouldn't be looking. He shouldn't be thinking about looking at her in her when she was in such a state of undress!
She noticed. Then she looked down at herself and realized why he was acting the way he was. She made him uncomfortable.
"Okay, I'll be out in a few minutes…" She whispered and she closed the door again.
He shook his head and mentally slapped himself. What the hell was he doing!
He went back into the kitchen and found two cups and poured the tea.
What the heck was wrong with her! Why had she opened the door? She hit her forehead with her palm and sighed. She hadn't meant to embarrass him.
She dried off and went back into her room and threw on the first clothes that she pulled from the wardrobe after putting on underclothes. A light blue sweater and khaki pants. She looked at herself in the mirror and sighed. It wasn't worth the energy to morph her hair into short pink spikes. She settled for brushing it and picked up her wand and cast a drying spell. There, now she at least looked somewhat presentable.
She left her room and made her way to the kitchen where Remus was carrying two cups of steaming tea over to the table.
She had to say something… apologize….
Good job, stupid!
He turned and looked at her, somewhat curiously.
"I….I'm sorry. I…I shouldn't have opened the door…."
So she had noticed….
"It's…. alright Nymphadora. I was just a bit… taken aback." He said stiffly and he pulled out one of the chairs.
"Here…" He whispered and he waited for her to sit before taking his seat across from her.
"Thanks…" And she picked up her tea and took a sip. He'd already added the sugar for her. He must have been paying attention the last time they had had tea… But that was ages ago at Grimmauld Place. He had a good memory.
"Too much sugar?"
She had made an odd face. Perhaps the tea was too sweet. Was it three spoons of sugar? Or had he remembered wrong?
"No, it's perfect. You have a very good memory." She smiled and then frowned. "I'm sorry I took so long."
"What were you thinking about, if you don't mind my asking….?"
"Just….everything began to sink in…." She said quietly.
"And now you feel differently about our situation…?"
She looked up at him and shook her head vehemently.
"No, of course not! It's just that… well, it's an odd sort of situation…"
"I'm just…. I don't really know anything about anything…" She muttered miserably.
"If that were true, Nymphadora, then you never would have been accepted into the Ministry."
She was crying now. And it broke his heart.
"No! I mean I don't know the first thing about children! I've never even babysat! How am I supposed to take care of a baby! I'm such a blundering klutz that I know I'll end up dropping the poor kid on its head! They'd be lucky to make it to their first birthday. No child deserves to be cursed with me as their mother!" She sobbed.
"Nymphadora!" He was at her side now, kneeling next to her chair and he had taken her hands in his.
She looked down at him. He had never yelled at her like that before….
"That's not true. Any child would be fortunate to have you as their mother." He spoke calmly now and gently stroked her hands.
She swayed on her chair toward the floor and he caught her and pulled her into his chest before she could fall. Clutching at his sweater, she buried her face in his shoulder, her tears soaking the fabric.
"Shhh. It's all right now. It's okay…" He whispered and he rubbed her back soothingly as he held her close.
"No, it isn't! I can't take care of a baby! And now I've made you angry and…."
You want to leave.
"No Nym. You haven't." She looked up at him, her face covered in tears and her eyes watery.
"I'm not upset with you Nymphadora, just a little worried about you. I know this is just your fear talking. It's all right. It's okay to be afraid."
"Aren't you scared?"
You have no idea…..
"Yes, very. I'm scared for you, for the baby…. But I feel more at ease now." He smiled.
"Because you are no longer bottling up your emotions about the pregnancy. You're allowing yourself to feel. It's much healthier. And now I know that you are just as frightened as I am."
Though, not about the same things…
"But you aren't happy, are you?"
"About the pregnancy. You'd rather I didn't have the baby, wouldn't you?"
You wish I'd never gotten pregnant.
"Yes, it's true that I would rather the situation have been different, but… I am happy about the baby."
She stared at him in disbelief. He was going to have to explain that.
"I…I never would have wanted you to become pregnant under these circumstances. It wasn't planned and… well, we weren't human… I would have preferred a situation where you weren't forced into having a child."
"I already told you…"
"I know." He cut her off. "You've told me that it was your choice…. And I am relieved by that."
"But are you happy?"
You don't need to lie to me.
He was silent for a moment and then a small smiled appeared on his lips.
Why is he smiling?
"I watched as my schoolmates went off and found lovers and started families… Sirius and I were there in the hospital when Harry was born. We were so happy for James and for Lily… I had convinced myself that the closest I would ever be to having a family would be to have my friends and be a sort of uncle to Harry…" Tears welled up in his golden eyes.
"I…I never thought I would….I…" His voice trailed off and a tear rolled down his cheek.
She looked up at him and new tears formed in her eyes. He had wanted a family… He had wanted to be a father….
I was wrong!
Her arms wrapped around him and she hugged his tightly. They probably looked like a couple of idiots, kneeling on the kitchen floor sobbing in each other's arms. And she didn't care!
"Oh Remus, I'm sorry! I didn't mean to upset you." She cried.
He shook his head and hugged her as close as he could.
"Don't be sorry Nymphadora. You've given me so much. Please don't be sorry for that."
What had she given him? She was the one crying on his shoulder. He was the one comforting her, not the other way around and it had been her question that had brought him to the point of tears.
She pulled back a bit and looked up at him. Before she could speak, his handkerchief found her face and gently began to dab away her tears.
"And I won't, not ever."
"What?" She whispered, not knowing what he was referring to.
"I won't leave you."
"How did you…?"
"Your eyes say more than you know." He smiled.
She bit her lip and hugged him again. He laughed lightly and stroked her hair.
"What did you mean…what did you mean when you said I had given you so much? I haven't…." She whispered as she pulled back.
He lifted her chin so that she was looking up at him and he smiled at her.
"Your friendship and love, for starters."
"Remus…you've always had those."
His eyes twinkled at her.
"A lover, a child, and a family of my own." He said quietly.
Her eyes widened.
He leaned closer to her and his lips brushed against her ear.
"My ultimate fantasy." He whispered so softly that she almost didn't hear it over her heartbeat.
A gasp issued from her and he smiled at her again.
"Do you understand now?" He asked as he brushed a lock of hair behind her ear.
She nodded with tears in her eyes.
"I…I had no idea… Why didn't you tell me?"
He cocked his head to the side and gave a little laugh.
"I'm not in the habit of divulging my deepest desires very often, Nymphadora. Why haven't you told me your ultimate fantasy?" He countered with a grin.
I dare say I'd like to hear it.
She shook her head.
"You already know it by heart."
Funny, I don't remember it….
She took one of his hands in hers and placed it over her abdomen and looked back up at him. He looked slightly confused.
"A family with the person I love most."
He blushed and then smiled before wrapping her in his arms again.
She leaned against him and sighed contentedly. She felt at peace in his arms. At least he was happy and that was a comforting thought.
Then it dawned on her….
"Damn!" She muttered.
"What? What's the matter?"
"The tea's gone cold!"
A/N: Several people were kind enough to review and explicitely told me to write a sequel. And who am I to argue? God! There were a few times when I thought I might cry while writing this one. I hope it wasn't too sappy for ya. And considering the amount of "Father-to- be" material in this one, it's appropriate that it's getting posted on Father's Day- it's also being dedicated to my dad because of what day it is. Ain't I a sap? Oh well. Thanks for coming into my little perversion of the HP universe and reading along. I really appricate it. Reviews welcome! And Happy Father's Day!
Disclaimer 2: I am not liable for any and all cavities that may becaused by the reading of this post!