Hey all! Indi here, with my first Kingdom Hearts fic. It's centered around Organization XIII (favorites of mine) and is supposed to be just silly and cute. There are no romance pairings, so I'm sorry if that's what you were looking for. As of now, it's only a few chapters long (2 or 3), but I might do a sequel if there is enough clamoring for it and the plotbunnies are generous with their bounty. And onwards!
"C'mon? I'll go as low as 50 munny."
"What are the two of you doing!" Both blond nobodies jumped several feet in the air as Xemnas, their superior, entered the corridor holding a slim envelope. Luxord spoke up.
"My apologies sir, but I was just trying to get Roxas to bet on the results of yesterday's testing… If you don't mind taking a look yourself my rates are rather reasonable." Xemnas decided that the organization should be tested for reasoning skills and general intelligence, using something that would be called an "IQ test" in most worlds. According to Xemnas, this would help him calculate which member would be better for missions involving high-level analytical skills. Hopefully this would end the anonymous comments in the Organization's suggestion box that the senior members were always choosing "the wrong guy" for the mission. As soon as the testing was done, Luxord had tried to entice the other members into betting on their positions. No one had taken him up, much to his disappointment.
"Are those our scores?" Roxas eyed the envelope in his boss' hand. He was curious as to how he measured up to the other members in terms of intelligence. Of course he didn't expect to be first, the original members were scientists after all, but he was hoping to score respectably.
"Yes." The boss' answer was curt. "You two, gather the others in the Proof of Existence, that area should serve this purpose well."
"Care to tell us how we did first? Eh Xemnas?" Luxord asked curiously.
"I have not even opened this envelope yet, I shall do it when we have all gathered in the Proof." Xemnas let himself nearly smile. The testing started for analytical purposes only, but it quickly spread into a competition amongst the order. The two younger nobodies saluted Xemnas sharply and ran off to collect the others.
They were rather lucky, Roxas reflected as he leaned against the cool blue wall in the Proof of Existence. They had managed to find the rest of the organization in record timing. And they seemed rather excited about the result. Xemnas gently rapped his knuckles against the wall to call the room to attention. Twelve pairs of eyes turned towards him.
"Ahem, if I may say a few things before I reveal the results. Firstly, you are all intelligent"- a few heads turned towards some of the younger members- "seriously, you are. You all scored above average compared to some score sheets I got with the test. So no one should feel inferior. Also, the first five members had a higher average, but that should be expected as they were all scientists before becoming nobodies…"
"Ah! Question!" Larxene held her hand up. "You said the first five, but weren't there six of you?"
Xemnas shrugged. "Answer: Since I am using this data to assign missions, I saw no need to evaluate myself. Therefore, I am not included in these scores." Larxene interrupted again.
"Question! Is that the actual reason or did you score low and you don't want the rest of us to see it so that your ego and reputation can remain intact?"
"Answer: Shut up. Now, on to the results. All I know about the scores are what I have already told you. Your names are listed from the highest score to the lowest. Now I just need to open this sealed envelope..." As Xemnas adroitly slit the paper open, the rest of the Organization drew closer. When he pulled out the scorecard, he was promptly tackled by six overexcited nobodies who were the most competitive about the testing. It was all the Superior could do to drop the paper with a frightened squeak and cling to a wall a safe distance away from the dogpile. Looking up, he saw Xigbar, Lexaeus, Zexion, Saix, Demyx, and Larxene watching their fellow members wrestle for control of the results. At least half of them had some form of patience.
It was about two minutes later when Vexen emerged from the chaos, the paper with the results held firmly in his hands. He looked over the top and scowled, throwing the paper behind him where it hit Axel in the face. As Axel grabbed it and ran away, Roxas, Xaldin, Luxord, and Marluxia chasing after him, Vexen turned to the small group who had decided to wait for the scorecard.
"Second!" Vexen slouched against the wall, arms folded over his chest. "I cannot believe I came in second! At least the member in first wasn't a neophyte…"
"Mind telling us who it was?" Xigbar threw one of his guns up in the air where it spun and fell back into his waiting hand.
"It was him." Vexen pointed at Zexion, who arched his visible eyebrow in surprise.
"Got anything on the rest of us?"
"No, I didn't bother reading.." The remaining members heaved a collective and audible sigh as shouts rang out from the corridor above them. About five minutes and seven rumblings that sounded suspiciously like faraway explosions later, Axel and the others walked back into the proof. Xaldin was the one holding the paper, but all five of them had a knowledgeable look that told the others they all had seen it. They also had a varied arrangement of new cuts and bruises that were likely acquired in the aforementioned struggle. Xaldin handed the paper to Xigbar, who noticed that the former was missing one of his trademarked sideburns. He shuddered, once more glad that he decided to wait.
"So, anything we wouldn't expect?"
"Read it and see. But yeah, I think there's a cheater in our midst." Axel said.
"A cheater? What do you mean?" Larxene shot the others a piercing glance. Marluxia was the one to answer.
"Let's just say, if I had more munny on me I would have bet on some one to fall in last, by a mile. Some one who managed to get into the top half."
"Let's see here…" Xigbar ran his eye down the list of names. "Hmmm, wasn't expecting that. You guys take a look." The remaining organization members gathered around the Freeshooter and stared at the results. They read as follows…
Organization XIII Official Intelligence and Reasoning Skills Evaluation
(tie) Lexaeus and Demyx
There was a brief moment of silence in the Proof of Existence as the Organization fully digested the information. Demyx froze, he didn't cheat, he knew he didn't cheat, he really had tried his best, but third? And the highest score outside the original members? He couldn't expect the others to believe it. He himself didn't believe it. Shaking, he took a couple steps backwards and then turned around and began to run. Unfortunately, it wasn't fast enough.
Saix let out a roar and pounced on the Melodious Nocturne. Demyx felt the air rush out of him as Saix's elbow rudely collided with his abdomen. The Lunar Diviner rudely hoisted him up by the hood of his cloak. Demyx was about to protest when he saw the sharp point of a kunai just millimeters away from his neck. Larxene snarled at him.
"We are going to see the superior about this… NOW!"