Papa goes Gaga

By: russet-fangs

Author's notes: this is not based on personal experience! Wahaha… anyway, sorry for the grammatical/ typo errors, I don't edit. I must say that reviews are good inspirations for writers/ wannabes (like me) so please review or just note my mistakes or leave an opinion, whatever.

Disclaimer: papa goes gaga is based on my Filipino story , "problemang mag-asawa", this is not so original but I somehow own the plot but of course, not the characters.


Adults usually fight on unreasonable things. They fight when they don't understand each other, they fight when their large family is starving, they fight when the sun don't shine, they fight when the rain falls down; they fight even because of a small plant growing on the backyard. Naturally, many people would wonder why grown-ups grow backwards.

My story started on the very morning of a couple's house. The place was small but the luxuries you would see are overwhelming. The Hyuuga clan's collection of huts, located humbly on the outskirts of Konoha, is downright cheap on first glance. But Neji would not approve of that. He would avail of the most decent and luxurious hut/ house for his beloved family. They are now starting to form new clan for the Hyuuga with his wife, Tenten.

Last month, their relationship has grown too smoothly that the two has decided to get married soon. Everybody was shocked to such quick decisions but the lovers would not break.

They were happy, they thought every inch of their lovers' personalities is familiar to them but they are very wrong…

After a month or two, Neji and Tenten started arguing about little problems until their so called "discussions" silently and slowly grew into a huge obstacle.
The married couple continued on with their life, happily but not satisfactory. Consequences have gotten into them fast.

Someone suggested to them making a child so that their relationship would be more bonded and at least get both of them some refreshments. This appealed to both parties and one year later, a baby with the blood of a Hyuuga, was born into our messy world.

The baby was named Yuki, the newest product of their love. He is now a she, a dignified one for that matter, thanks to constant teasing of his uncle Lee about youth and love. Oh, how cruel the world is. How unfair… anyhow, Yuki is still 3 years old and things could change when one is still small, right?

The fate of the Hyuuga would change thanks to some more cruelty from the creator. An injection of another being would definitely trim the shattered pieces of a weakening relationship.

Let's get back to the story around the morning. Poor Neji forgot to greet his wife a "good morning" and unfortunately, Tenten is IN the mood for some bickering because her moods are now annoyingly swinging.

She started with a bang and ends it up with a boom.

She said hurtful words (should be censored for small children reading this that is why I wouldn't write much here) far too hurtful for Neji's feelings. He loved the girl, man! He loved her. She has insulted not only his physical appearance but his overall character.

The two then again argued, long time until…

"You didn't really care for me, Hyuuga and I surely know that you would never be! You are so unable to take good care of this family! We should break up!" Tenten was down on her knees with Yuki cradled on her arms, both of them crying their lungs out. Suddenly, to be able to express her emotions more, Tenten started waving her arms up and down. Naturally the baby would fall…

Luckily, Tenten was on her knees so Yuki didn't cover more injuries than expected. Neji rushed to his kid's aid and snatched her/him away from his/her mother.

The two walked out the house before it exploded, looking at the gossiping neighbors nearby. The husband stared at them, almost saying, get lost or die. Father and son helped themselves with some spare bare bread on Neji's pocket. It would be the last of their comfortable day.

They strode along away from the house, rent a room at an inn and tried to analyze what is happening to their lives.

Yuki babbled something into his father's ear but the latter interpreted it as hunger. Papa looked at his son then a fact slapped his face hard.

Tenten is again pregnant and her due of delivery would be on this week.

Overwhelmed with guilt and stupidity, the man closed his eyes and planned for action. What now, genius?

He slid from the bed onto his foot and walked towards the window. "We should have rented a place where we could monitor your mother" he said trying to be a good host for the small child on the bed who's still babbling crazy language.

He opened the window and stared in awe at the sight. The place they rented really is just in front of their house. No wonder they got in their fast.

Now, he could take care of his wife without destroying his ego.

A small cough and the problem took a go… Yuki is having a high fever. His eyes are slowly going up and as hot as the sun. now, Neji feels like having a fever too.

If only Tenten's here, she would know what to do…, he regretted the thought and called Hinata.

"Hinata…Yuki has fever, what do you think would I do?" "You could bring her here"
"What do you mean by HER"
"Sorry, Neji"
"Where's Tenten"
"Don't go digging; I'll bring him there, thanks"

He hung up without taking a reply and ripped out the sheets of the bed to cover the child. He walked, starvation slowly creeping up in his large intestines. 30 minutes of walking (he couldn't jump from tree to tree because he doesn't know how to properly cradle a child, he's afraid Yuki might fall), Neji is now knocking on his cousin's door.

The world is now spinning fast and this adult sat tiredly as the silent movie casts up its story in his eyes. Another problem got in the way just after they arrived. Uncle Hisashi's drunk and screamed at Neji for being an idiot for leaving his wife.

He rapidly ran away with his son in hand, not knowing still on what to do. He sat the sidewalk, figuring out how much would the two of them would suffer. He closed his eyes, praying that this would stop… Yuki coughed hard, stirring his father into reality. He got up and went to Sasuke's house.

On his way there, he met the legendary Sannin, Jiraiya, who offered his services. Neji doubted the old man's skills but anything seems like a chance for his child to be good again, he would try it.

20 minutes later, Yuki lost consciousness on the heated, smelled-like-wine-and-women, cheap apartment of Jiraiya. Neji blasted his emotions on him but calmed not allowing his subjectivity ruin his son's life.

He ran, imagining his large intestines consuming his small intestines while his stomach grin widely over the commotion. Knocking nicely and politely on the Sasuke's door, Neji tried to rest his mind a bit and try to act cool.

He was warmly acknowledged by a cocked eyebrow, followed by a smirk. It was obvious that Neji is presently suffering from anxiety and is terribly confused. Hell has broke lose in his world. Now he needed help from a declared foe.

"Hyuuga, how come you're here"
"Isn't it obvious poker face"
"You're the one needing help so try to be a good boy"
"Could you please tell me what to do when a child gets fever"
"I could give you the answer but nonetheless you would need the assistance of your beloved wife"
"I kind of figured that out"
"So, what are you still waiting for"
"The answer"
"You won't give it"
"I should have not wasted my time on you"
"Thanks anyway"
"That is quite nice of you"

Neji didn't ran after that. He wanted time to analyze his approach and by the time he's walking on the street about 20 km more from their house, Neji turned into a projectile, pretty much awed by the situation when a sudden idea hit him again.

He left his wallet on the apartment!

He was now penniless, wretched, starved, tired, looking like a hobo and alone with a sick child far away from their house. This is what happens when you left your house without permission from your wife.

Neji walked. Neji strode.
Neji minced slowly.
Neji ran.
Neji saw light.
Neji was happy.

The man of the humble hut came into the house with a huge grin in his face, happy that he has made it through. He removed his slippers, cradled his son some more, tried to find his wife inside the house and relaxed some muscles.

In the kitchen, a figure of a lady, frowning simply at herself, lay in front of Neji's eyes. Looking at Tenten right now seems as if he has made another grave mortal sin against the world. She was heavenly in more ways than one. The boulders of his suffering have been lifted and now he could sigh and try to make things work out.

he made his way on her side, keeping a hand to her shoulder. She stared at him, eyes wide and smiled warmly.

"How's your day?"

His life is normal again; he smiled to her before collapsing in her shoulders.

Tenten took the child and her husband to the room. At the end of the day, the couple found out their relationship might be usually dysfunctional, but it is certainly satisfying to have them around. The movie of the couple's life with their unique son definitely is not just simply black and white. It's colored with lots of red, green and yellow.

12:00, midnight, Neji woke up abruptly and saw his family sleeping happily beneath the sheets. Moral lesson: never ever walk out of the house with your son.


Notes: wahaha… ok so this is not so inspiring and strikingly funny. I just wrote it because I'm happy to have a father who can do the entire house chore alone! Thanks for the reviewers. Sorry for the OOCness… I cannot allocate more their characters!