Title: Early Morning Mercy
Rating: R for language, mentions of sex
Warnings: It occurred to me recently that I almost never write the real ending to the movie. And that's kinda sad. It's like I can't face the fact that Jack was mowed down with bullets. It still upsets me too much to watch past that part. Anyway, no other warnings than the usual about how the boys and anything related to the movie doesn't belong to me. But if they did...
Summary: Jack's nightmares lead to late night musings.
Final Warning: Mentions of sex, slash pairing of Bobby/Jack
Jack's knees gave out as Bobby thrust forward a final time. He fell to the mattress with a muffled 'oomph' into his pillow. Bobby gave a long groan and shuddered as his orgasm ripped through him. As they hit the mattress, Bobby pulled Jack with him onto their sides.
Jack was making short breathy gasps, his hair flopping over his eyes. Bobby rested his head between Jack's shoulder blades and took a few deep breaths. His arms around Jack, ignoring the fact that his right one was slowly going numb, he could feel Jack's still racing heartbeat under his hand.
He pushed his toes around, searching for the blankets that they had kicked to the edge of the bed. He found the edge of one and dragged it upwards until his hand could pull the rest up. Jack mumbled a 'thanks' as Bobby pulled the blanket over his shoulders. Bobby laid his head down again. They slept.
Jack whimpered in his sleep, tossing his head a bit, silent 'no's falling from his lips.
Bobby blinked blearily at the clock. 3 a.m. 'Fuck' he thought. Another night, another nightmare. Bobby had taken to sleeping in bed with Jack for the past three months in an attempt to ease Jack's nightmares, an effort that left him exhausted during the daytime.
He sighed softly as he geared himself up for another episode. He reached for Jack's left arm, wary of any sudden movements. He gently placed his hand on his elbow and shook him a little.
"Jack" he whispered. Jack twitched, his eyes screwed shut and his face contorted. He shook a little harder.
"Jack", louder now.
Jack was tossing his head faster now, the 'no's coming faster and louder than before. Bobby propped himself up on his elbow as he leaned over Jack's side. He rested his hands on either side of Jack's face and held him steady.
"One of these days, you're gonna whip yourself outta bed" Bobby said, almost under his breath.
Jack's shoulders were shaking as he fought his dream.
"Jack!" Bobby near shouted, "Wake up, come on, wake up man"
Jack lunged forward suddenly, his lunge cut short by the fact that Bobby was holding on as hard as he could. He fell back, a bewildered look in his eyes as he scanned the room thoroughly. He felt Bobby's arms around him and relaxed slightly. He sighed then and ran his hands over his face.
"Bad one?" Bobby asked as he reluctantly let go of him.
"Yeah" Jack said, his hands still covering his face. Bobby frowned, Jack never covered his face after a dream, and he'd always curled up to Bobby, almost seeking protection from the darkness. But now, he was stiff as a board, his hands shielding his face from him. He lay back, the frown deepening as he felt the tension pouring off of Jack in waves.
He considered forcing Jack's hands off his face, then discarded the idea almost immediately.
'Jack will talk when he's ready to Bobby, and you're just as bad as he is when it comes to talking' his mother's voice whispered in his mind.
He gave a short grin. He supposed he'd hear his mother's pearls of wisdom in his head till the day he died.
The silence hung in the room for awhile, before Jack finally pulled his hands from his face. He then curled up towards Bobby, blindly seeking comfort. Bobby allowed him to snuggle in and rested his head against Jack's.
"You, uh, wanna tell me about it?" he asked as he ran one hand up and down Jack's arm, then his back, his short nails lightly dragging along the skin. Jack shivered as he felt the nails scrape over his skin, his eyes slightly unfocused.
He licked his suddenly dry lips as he shook his head slightly. Bobby nodded absently.
"Alright then, you don't have to y'know."
"I know", the barely audible words muttered against Bobby's chest. He continued to run his hand aimlessly on his back, soothing Jack the best way he knew how.
Bobby watched the clock as it ticked forward slowly to 4 a.m. Just before 4, Jack began to whisper, and for a brief moment, Bobby feared that he had fallen asleep and was now caught in another nightmare. He leaned his head a bit closer to Jack and listened hard.
"If I tell you, you gotta promise not to get mad, Bobby" Jack whispered, his lips rubbing the skin with their movements.
Bobby sighed. "After all these years, you still think I'm gonna hurt you Jackie?"
Jack shook his head, a silent protest. "No, I'm afraid that you'll be hurt" he said, a hoarse sob fighting its way past his lips.
"You know you can say anything sweetheart, I ain't gonna kick you outta the bed for tellin' me somethin' I may not like" Bobby said with a soft chuckle.
Jack grinned for a moment before his mouth drooped again. He held his breath a moment, then pushed the words out quickly. "I dreamt about you" he said.
"And that's bad how?" he asked, striving for a light tone. Jack rubbed his head against Bobby's chest again, his hair tickling Bobby's chin.
"It wasn't a...good dream though" he said, his voice full of sadness.
Bobby closed his eyes. 'Now what, Ma? Any advice?' he thought, frustrated at his inability to speak the way he wanted to. He fought to make his voice calm.
"Guess that's the thing about dreams, Jack, it always seems worse durin' and after you know it's not real."
Jack shuddered, "Sure as fuck seemed real" he said.
They lay in silence again as Bobby thought about what he should be saying while Jack traced some of the patterns on his upper arm. They moved around a bit, ending up with Jack spooning up to Bobby, his head resting on Bobby shoulder as he held on. He felt like he'd fall if he let go anytime soon.
He traced one of Bobby's tattoos, the words that were written across his skin. He traced each letter with his finger, enjoying the way Bobby's skin felt under his fingertips.
"Bobby" he said quietly. "Hmmm?" Bobby said his eyes half-open but alert.
"Why did you get this?" he asked as he traced the 'No Mercy' words over and over.
Bobby thought a moment. "I got it when I turned 25, Jackie, you know that" he said with a small grin.
Jack gave a short laugh. "No Bobby, I mean why? Why no mercy?" Bobby's grin faded.
He sighed then. "It means...what it says. I got it right after I got outta jail Jack. You've never been to jail man, it makes you tough, mean even. You do what you gotta do to survive." He paused for a moment, focusing on now and not the memory of his first night.
"I wanted somethin' to show I was as bad as any of those fuckers, worse than them, like I could show them what it feels like to be the weak one, the one who's shown no mercy like when I was..." he trailed off, lost in thought.
Jack wiped at his eyes angrily. 'Fuck! I always gotta ask the wrong question' he thought, suppressing the urge to smack himself. He'd known that Bobby had become the way he was now to survive, whereas he had withdrawn into himself for protection.
He gripped Bobby tighter and apologized softly. Bobby snorted.
"Don't be stupid. It ain't your fault. 'Sides, it doesn't matter now" Jack shook his head.
"It matters to me" Bobby laughed a bit. "Yeah it would."
Jack smiled then as he drifted off to sleep again. Bobby yawned, his jaw cracking. He snuck another glance at the clock and winced when he saw it was now 4:30 a.m. He closed his eyes and concentrated on the sound of Jack's slow, even breathing. He smirked to himself as he realized that once again Jack had gotten out of telling him something bad or personal.
'Jack is all together too good at that', he thought absently as he slid back asleep.