A/N- The memory scene is done without reference, so it's going to be from Chiaki's point of view. Dialogue will be made up, but it will follow the basic gist of the real moment they had in volume 4. Oh, and- I DON'T OWN ANY OF THE CHARACTERS OR SETTINGS FROM THE DEMON ORORON!!!!!
"I know that something's not right. I know that I haven't been attacked or contacted since you left." I paused, sighed, and relented. "I also know that something in me senses what's happened, but my brain just hasn't caught up yet." I closed my eyes in frustration. "There.Ya happy?" Silence. "Whatever." I turned and started to walk off before his long, frigid hand suddenly came to rest firmly on my shoulder, halting my progress.---
He chuckled briefly and responded, "Always."
"Do you like the rain Othello?"
"What?" he sounded a little caught off guard, but still amused.
"Because I don't." And the skies were overcast, but the rain had stopped.
For once, there wasn't so much as a chuckle from Othello. The sudden tremor of rage that raced up my spine stole my breath as the bottle flew from my hand. The sound of the shattering glass calmed me slightly, enough to turn back to Othello.
"Never mind, I don't want to know. I don't want to know anything. I won't like the answers anyways."
"Just…just go. Go away, Othello, just go away."
"Fine, but just so we're clear, Ororon resisted you and his feelings for you for this very reason. You think you're only punishing yourself. You're not, Chiaki. Your pain is the world's pain, whether you like it or not."
Shocking, isn't it, to hear him be serious? I concentrated on the sudden absence of presence behind me that marked Othello's departure. I brought back the rain, I searched out another bottle; anything to keep that memory from coming back. Damn you, Othello. The pain wrenched through me and filled the whole inside my chest with a burning that brought me to my knees.
"UUUUUUUUUUUHHHHHH," my keening wail filled the air for a brief second before the memory came crashing over me.
++No, no no no. No Ororon! Please. I can't even say "stay with me Ororon," I can't even say "I love you, Ororon." I'm an idiot. He tells me how he's always making me cry, how he's always hurting me. No, you're different Ororon! It's not your fault! But he's dieing…he's dieing right in front of me. He tried to stay away, he tried to push me away because he made me cry?! No, no. It's my fault because I'm weak. Ororon, you're not weak, YOU'RE NOT WEAK ORORON! So why are you dieing?++
It was a long night. A painful night surrounded by a blizzard I didn't even know I had it in me to create.
At some point during that particularly long night, God came to me…again. I had lied to Othello. I had one visitor, one contact, one hunter- God. If I hadn't already been driven to insanity by the death of…by the death of him, God surely would have shredded what little sanity I had left by his constant appearances and badgering. He was always hiding in the shadows, whispering in my ear, screaming, singing, screeching, humming. It was nerve-wracking, to say the least. It was hard enough trying to ignore the words that I couldn't even guard against the emotions behind his voice.
I was back in the house with the hole in the wall, lying on the floor again, when he appeared. He floated over me, his depthless eyes staring into mine calmly. I grimaced in disgust and turned over. I knew I didn't have the strength to block his words tonight.
"Chiaki," he started. I wanted to gag. I suddenly hated the sound of my name, because of the way it came from his lips.
"Don't call me that."
"Chiaki, stop being obstinate and just…"
"Just what? Just save the world? Yeah," I scoffed, "riiiiight. Okay, let me just run and get my cape and we'll be ready to go."
"It's not funny, you're not funny Chiaki."
"Oh, really? I happen to think I'm very funny."
"You think that just because you lost the one you loved, tha…"
"IT WAS MORE THAN ONE DAMNIT!" I screamed as I flew to my feet in an overwhelming flurry of rage and grief. "I LOST EVERYONE! It was bad enough the way my parents were lost," I sneered, "but no, that wasn't enough was it?! WAS IT?! You took away my only friends! Even the ones who didn't die, you sent them back didn't you?!
"And then you took him," I gasped at the memory of his face lying on the crushed pavement, covered in blood. I fell to the ground again as the sobs began to rack my body. "You took the only one I ever loved. You took him awaaaaay," I moaned. I sounded like a baby, like a toddler who's lost its mother. I couldn't do it though; I just couldn't summon the strength to hold it all back.
"Chiaki, I didn't take anyone. None of this was by my choice."
"But you chose not to stop it," I whispered, "You chose to sit there and watch as what little I had was completely destroyed. And you claim that you care about me."
I could feel his shock and I smirked. "Didn't think I heard that, did you?"
"I'm going back to sleep. Go pester someone else, someone who actually cares maybe?"
For once, he did what I asked. And I was alone. Maybe if God had been silent, it would have been nice to have him around; he kept the place warm.
I woke up the next morning to the inexplicable urge to run. So I ran. I ran all the way to the city limits and collapsed gasping, on the warm asphalt of the road. Moving my head and eyes slowly, I found a small convenience store off to my right. Somehow, I dragged myself over there and found a bottle of water in the refrigerated section that still worked despite having no one to operate it. The frigid water traced an icy line down my throat and the sudden cold caused my chest to constrict. It was like déjà vu. This was something from life before. This was something normal, something okay.
After the shivers had passed, I wandered aimlessly through the maze of corporate buildings, restaurants, and small stores that made up this particular end of town. The only reason I found the door was because I wasn't looking. It was a black door in a black wall in a black alley. I shouldn't have been able to find it at all. I guess being the Savior changes a person's perceptions of the world around them. All three blacks were different and, even if they weren't, I could feel the door. It reached out, grabbed at the hem of my boxers, and tugged. Even after I swatted the sensation away and continued on, it pulled at every fiber of my being. I felt like a child caught in a rip tide. Well, can't really swim against it, can you Chiaki? So I gave up and ambled my way back to the inconspicuous door that behaved like a attention-seeking toddler. Warily, I reached out my fingertips to brush against the blackest black I had ever seen before. At the first, tentative brush of the pads of my fingertips, the door slid smoothly open.
I hadn't known what to expect, but if I had made a guess to what was behind that door, I would have been dead wrong. Why? Why would this be here?
A/N- I know, I know. It's too short, it's been too long since the first chapter, blah blah blah. I really am sorry about my update-phobia, and I will try harder in the future to update what I can as often as I can. Also, I would to address imafrog19's comment briefly.
I am sorry if the drinking or wardrobe disappointed or just didn't sit well with you. The reason she drinks, as mentioned in the story, is to keep the memories and the pain away. It's pretty much that or suicide. Also, you will be happy to know that the drinking has officially ceased. Yay Chiaki! (And she never attended one AA meeting. We're all so proud.) As far as the wardrobe is concerned, she would feel uncomfortable wandering around naked, but doesn't feel like making the effort to actually "dress." Again, make with the gladness because the half-nakedness is also soon to cease! And for the whole "typo" thing, shakes head and hangs it in shame jeez I hate that. I hate typos with the fiery passion of a thousand suns. So, naturally, I was mortified when I read back over that first chapter again. Thank you for bringing that to my attention. (Btw- I say I hate typos, but I loved the typo joke in your comment).
And a big thank-you to everyone else who reviewed, faved, or alert listed:
Chikazuni- I know!! People totally need to write more Ororon fanfics! Thanx luv.
Sakurachild- Lol, I hope I continue it too! Thank ya, thank ya very much.
Cloudlvr23- You'd rock even more if you'd drop a review winkwink! Lol, j/k.
No, really though. Love ya anyways! FAV ROCKS!
Secret13- See above.:) Thanks for the alert and fav.
WARM FUZZIES ABOUND!!! --;