Foreword: WARNING! There is some explicit language. If you can't handle it, don't read it please. Also, I took a few liberties in the order of birth for the Angels. Basically, I'm saying, in this, that Kaworu was Adam and Lilith's first child.
A VERY Special Thanks To: Draknal, as always. He's a brilliant, and punctual proofreader, usually getting it completely proofread within an hour or so, despite his schedule. Everybody should thank him! Now, I'd like to thank Bryan, my friend, as well, since he did all he could to get on me about writing this… He's the one who basically forced me to work through my Writer's Block… Thanks a bunch, man. But also, I want to thank my readers, who've been patient with my sporadic updates. No pun intended either.
Just a Little Note: Okay, some person decided to say that Kaworu was some form of self insertion. Whoever you are, Kaworu is not a self-insert at all. I just wanted to have some fun with him, since I like him. I'm not forcing you to read this, you know…
"I really gotta do this…" Kaworu stared straight at the pale elevator doors, as though they were the gates of Hell. Their pristine paintjob added to the queasiness of Kaworu's stomach, with the silence clawing at his ears.
Staring down at the crimson card in his hands, he realized that he was shaking… shaking uncontrollably. His fingers twitched, and his hands quivered, while his whole arms trembled, and his body shook. The earthquake within his body was maxing out, and shattering the Richter scale.
"I… I'm gonna die… I'm gonna die… I'm-" His voice caught in his throat, as he pressed his head against the cool, steel doors. He closed his eyes tightly, hoping, praying even, that this was just a sick dream, and that it wasn't happening.
When he opened his eyes, he could feel the sweat drenching his body. He could feel his own mental anguish vividly, as though it was compressing him into a single atom. He felt the stinging of sweat dripping into his eyes, and realized that it was all a red haze.
As he stepped into the elevator, after swiping his card, Kaworu wiped some of the sweat away from his brow. Glancing down at his pale arm, he noticed the thin streams of blood on it. "I… I'm sweating blood? Wh… What the hell?!"
The silver haired boy pulled off his black shirt, and stared at his formerly white undershirt. Using the long sleeved shirt to whisk the bloody sweat off of his body, he discarded it in the corner of the elevator, as he continued his descent into Terminal Dogma.
His stained red shirt stuck to his trim body like a moist towel. 'I'm… I'm gonna die, but… but I can still do the right thing… can't I? If I do this… it'll… It'll make everybody happy, won't it?'
"What should I do…? What should I do?!"
My son… Welcome back… My son… Return to me… Become one with me… Let the world be reborn… I wish to have all of my children back…I can protect their very existence…
The thick, steel doors of the elevator split open, giving way to Terminal Dogma. Stepping directly out of the vertical carriage, Kaworu stared stonily at the massive crucified figure on the gargantuan scarlet cross. The glimmering shaft of a bronze colored object caught the eye of the young man.
With calm, even steps, Kaworu walked towards his fate, and his final judgment. The terrors of death still raced across his brain, and plagued his mind, showing visions of pure pain inside of his mind. Once again, he could feel the cold sweat tinged with blood trickling down his forehead, matting down the hair closest to his face.
Kaworu smirked and wiped the blood away, "I don't give a damn." A white hot light began to shine through his chest, with a faint red outline, as his "heart" began to kick into action. Orange waves of energy began to emanate forth from him, spilling out like a thick fog.
Though sirens and lights flashed and wailed, Kaworu simply stood there, glaring defiantly into the masked eyes of the behemoth he believed to be Adam, the first Angel.
"You aren't… Adam… You're Lilith, aren't you? Whatever, not like I care. As long as it gets the job done, right?" The young man stepped forward once again, and stood on the cement ledge, just before the Sea of LCL separating himself from what he now knew to be Lilith. Sadness tinged in his eyes, he began to gently float towards her.
He saw as a giant hole appeared within Lilith, and a pure white hand reached out for him, ready to take him in. Sighing in resignation, the young man quietly relayed his final wishes, "Just… just look after them, will you? He… may be a bit timid at times, but he's a good kid… She acts like a psycho and seems real tough, but she's got a heart of gold… And… Make sure to give my Snow Globe a good shake or two."
Shooting open like darts, steely scarlet eyes speedily spread their sights across the room. Something had disturbed the pale girl from her sleep, however it didn't seem to be on a physical level. Everything in her room was just as she had left it.
An impending sense of danger and catastrophe slithered over her body, like thousands of tiny worms, an arctic chill wracking her lithe and slender body. She could feel a slight pressure inside of her head, like somebody was pressing a finger against her eyeball. It was the same dull ache that she felt whenever an Angel was present… But it was different. It wasn't the same. Rei had a bad feeling about this.
"Something is… … … wrong."
Letting out a prolonged sigh, Shinji relaxed himself under the steamy waters spouting forth from the showerhead. It was always a soothing experience to be in the waters. Before his time with Misato, he hadn't really taken time to enjoy such trivial activities like showering, but since his breezy guardian had convinced him to slow down and take life in, he had found himself more apt to take pleasure in the little things in life.
His eyes softly closed, and he leaned against the warmed tiles of the shower. From outside in the hall, the young man heard a rustling, and could tell that somebody was standing there. "Asuka… If that's you, stop trying to peek in on me… and Misato, if that's you, Asuka will call the police or something… Besides, we all know you'd rather be peeking in on her."
"Shinji Ikari! That is absolutely disgusting!" Yep… It was definitely Asuka. "And besides… I wasn't trying to peek in on you. I was just walking by… Oh well… I guess you wouldn't want that surprise I planned for you." Her words were seductive as ever, as they filtered through the door.
Immediately, Shinji's eyes popped open, and he glanced around the shower curtain, to make sure that the door was still closed. "That's very… er… nice, Asuka… Actually, after hearing that, I'm not sure if I want to come out."
"Aw, come on, Shinji. Everybody loves surprises… especially when it's one from somebody as great as me." Shinji shivered, as he imagined every motion that he knew his girlfriend could possibly be making. To be frank, it scared him.
"Uh… I think I'm… you know, safer in here…" Regardless of what he was saying, Shinji still stepped out of the shower, and dried himself off.
"Erhalten Sie Ihren Esel aus hier, jetzt gleich, Dummkopf! Arghh! Idiot!"
"Err… Asuka? Um… Could you repeat that, but in Japanese? I'm sorry… I don't speak German." Shinji smiled faintly, envisioning the flustered look on Asuka's face. She only got that way when she was irritated… and Shinji found it quite cute… Just like when she lapsed into German. He quickly pulled on a pair of sweat pants, and silently counted to himself. 'She'll bust through the door in about… hmm… five. Four. Three. Two. On-'
Growling, the redhead stomped a foot impatiently, and folded her arms across her chest. "I said, Get out here NOW! You know what?! Never mind, Shinji! I'm coming in!" She quickly grabbed hold of the door and slid it open, to be greeted by a half clothed boy. "Humph. At least you had the decency to get dressed before greeting a lady… especially one as beautiful as myself."
Cheekily smiling, he placed a hand on her shoulder and gently squeezed, "Asuka… Beautiful is an understatement, and you know it."
Caught in a moment between irked and elated, Asuka simply opted to toss her arms around Shinji, and whisper a few words of gratitude.
"So… what did you want to show me? What was that surprise you were talking about?" Shinji let his hand slip downward, tracing a line along her arm, before finally gripping her hand in his own.
Slyly grinning at him, she quickly said, "Well now, I'm not so sure I should let you have it…" After a few moments, her smile vanished, and instead, it was replaced by an inquisitive frown, and she quietly said, "Hey Shinji… do you remember back before we were… you know, together? You said I only wanted to be your friend in secret… What… What do you think about that now?"
He carefully and affectionately, pushed the flaming locks hair out of her face, saying "Asuka… That's all behind us now… But now, I'd say that you're my best friend in the world… and a person that I treasure more than myself, not to mention a person I gladly share my love with. Uh oh… I'm running out of things to say, but you get my point, right? So… what brought all that on?"
"Nothing… I just like it when you tell me things like that. It makes me feel good. I already know you feel that way, it's just… I dunno, reassuring to hear it directly from your mouth."
As Shinji opened his mouth to say something, the sirens outside began loudly ringing, signifying an Angel attack. The young man shut his mouth, and motioned towards the door with his head, and began on his way.
The fiery German girl whipped him around and kissed him softly, yet passionately. When they parted, she whispered into his ear, "Überraschung, Shinji!" She also began her own path towards the door, and looked over her shoulder, winking, "That means 'Surprise'."
Kaworu could feel his body drifting in the air, gently being pulled towards a source of heat. From what he could tell, He was going to be absorbed by Lilith soon enough, and he would have initiated Third Impact.
'And… everyone will be happy.' With a sigh he braced himself for any type of disturbance, not sure how things would feel. 'They'll all be happy, right? … Will I be happy? Will everybody be happy when they're basically dead? They wouldn't be able to make decisions… They'd…'
Feeling the cool fingers of Lilith wrap around his body, Kaworu's eyes instantly snapped open. With the conviction of all of humanity in his voice, Kaworu gave substance to the defiant decree of each person. "NO!" Clenching his eyes shut tightly, Kaworu valiantly shouted, with every fiber of his being reinforcing his bold decree. His swirling AT Field rippled, and gathered to him, before exploding outward, completely obliterating the extended arm of the Angel, shattering it into millions of pieces.
The whispers of humanity scourged his will ceaselessly, worse than any pestilence seen by man. Every one of them had thoughts, desires, hopes, and dreams. Every one of them had one thing on their mind… Live. They wanted to live.
As his eyes slowly reopened, he stared back at Lilith, who was still in her place. There was no hole. Her arms were still spread outward, pinned up to the massive, crimson cross. "Was it… Was it all my imagination?" He stared directly at the crucified Angel, and narrowed his eyes.
From the confines of his pocket, he heard the melodious ringing of his cellular phone. The young Angel brought it to his ear, and simply said, "Fuck off. I ain't gonna do your shit this time, so you can get your haggard asses out here and do this shit yourselves."
"The council is not amused with your games… However, we were not without a backup plan. As we speak, the completed Evangelion series is advancing on your position. Third Impact will be initiated. You were merely an irrelevant tool… a simple toy for amusement. And like all toys, you must be broken… just as your friends must be."
"Listen up, robo-bitch! If you mess with me or my friends, you'll fucking die! Hear me?! Lay one hand on Rei, or the others, and I'll make you wish you had a mechanical everything!" Kaworu screamed angrily into the receiver, rage fueling his threats.
"Be quiet, like a good child. Waste must be removed, and you are waste."
Throwing the phone into the glistening, orange water, Kaworu shook with anger, scenarios running through his head over all of the terrible things that could happen to him, but more importantly, his friends.
Gusts of air assailed him, as a group of nine white Evangelions fluttered into Terminal Dogma, via various shafts lining the ceiling. Before he could react, Kaworu found himself batted out of the air due to a powerful stroke from a wing from his adversaries. Their lipsticked grins looked on hungrily as they saw Kaworu crack down on the cement island in front of Lilith.
Ritsuko Akagi and Misato Katsuragi both looked on in horr- well… More like Ritsuko looked on in horror, as the computers detected a total of ten Absolute Terror fields in Terminal Dogma. Misato simply stared over the doctor's shoulder, trying to make sense of the jumble of words, numbers, and symbols.
Misato scratched at her scalp, and let her fingers gently slide through her luxurious hair, "Uhh… Ritsuko? What the heck does all this mumbo-jumbo mean? All I know is that I think I saw a drawing of an eyeball in there somewhere…"
As Misato took a sip of coffee, the faux-blonde doctor stared completely wide eyed at her, leaning against the computer terminal for support. "This is… Oh my God… There are ten A.T. Fields in Terminal Dogma…"
Major Katsuragi instantly spit out her coffee and cried, "Whaa?! Ten!? Are you positive?! Th-That's impossible! There's only supposed to be one Angel left! How can there be ten fields?! Are you sure the MAGI aren't broken?"
"Major Katsuragi, the MAGI are fine…" The hoarse, deep voice of Commander Ikari rang out on the command bridge, as his dark presence seemed to shroud him even more thickly than before. "Instruct the pilots to prepare for hand to hand combat… There is no need for using any guns in such close quarters."
"Y-Yes sir… right away."
"I thought I told you…" Kaworu growled, as he picked himself up from the ground, blood freely dripping from his forehead. "Don't fuck with my PERSONAL SHIT!" The young man raised an arm towards Lilith's figure, and stared intently at the massive Lance of Longinus lodged in her chest.
The spiraling shaft of the gleaming weapon began to quiver, and slowly dislodge itself, until the whole of the weapon was suspended in the air, glistening droplets of LCL dripping off of the keen tip. Gradually, it moved closer and closer to the young man, retracting and becoming smaller as it went, so that it was proportional to him. A savage fire glowed deep within the demonically crimson eyes of Kaworu, and he felt the weapon rest itself against his palm, feeling the cool, twisted metal of the shaft.
Glaring in a semi-circle, Kaworu instantly focused on the nine ashen Evangelions. Twirling the spear in his hand, he shot forward like a dart, carving off limbs of the hulking adversaries. Since he was exponentially smaller than them, he was able to slip between the Evangelions with the ease of a gentle zephyr, and then turn and unleash the raging torrent of fury. As he hacked through two of the Mass Produced Evas, Kaworu grinned fiendishly. Running his fingers through his hair, the young man wiped the splatters of blood from his silvery locks.
Spinning through the air like a twister, albeit one with a sharp as hell lance, Kaworu clipped a fourth Evangelion in the throat before completely severing the head from its shoulders.
As the remaining five surrounded him like vultures, circling their prey, He simply shouldered the lance horizontally across his shoulders, arrogantly saying, "Come on… If I just dropped four of you bastards that quick, I don't think y'all will be any trouble…" He smirked viciously, as he glimpsed the floating, mangled and minced pieces of the four Evangelions that he had massacred. "Now come on, you mass-produced transvestite pieces of shit… I need to teach those SEELE fuckers a lesson they won't forget!"
"Like we really needed you telling us that, Misato…" Asuka rolled her eyes and reclined in the Entry Plug. She and her best friend would have to wait for a while, as their respective Evangelions were transported down an elevator shaft, into Terminal Dogma. "Besides, when do our normal guns ever help us kill Angels? We always end up having to stab the arschloch with our Progressive knives… Right, Shinji?"
"Hm…" He simply stared through the gossamer screens inside the Entry Plug, carefully and fretfully taking in as many details as he could. Though his eyes were frantically darting to and fro, Shinji had simply spaced out.
Seductively whispering, Asuka gently tapped on the screen of his picture, saying, "Shinji, dear… Are you listening? Hey, come on, idiot." Growling in frustration as she saw that her delicate diplomatic endeavors failed, the redhead punched the screen and shouted at him, "Dummkopf! Pay attention!"
"Hm? O-Oh… My bad… Sorry about that, Asuka. I was just…" His voice trailed off and once again, the young man assumed a wistful position, with a sad and distracted look in his eyes.
Asuka glared at her partner, angry that he was so distracted merely moments before they were to go into combat. "Well?! Just what?!"
"I… thought Kaworu was supposed to… you know…" Shifting uncomfortably under his girlfriend's baleful stare, he slowly continued his sentence, "join us? Isn't he the Fifth Child?"
"Oh stop worrying… I bet they just don't have an Eva for him. Just relax, things'll be fine. They always are…" Winking at him through her bright blue eyes, the girl laughed softly, "After all… You have me to protect you."
Over the grinding of the gears, and the noisy descent of the elevator, a pair of strident snarls sang their shrill song of sorrow, supplemented by sharp stitches of shrieking, like an animal caught in the jaws of death.
Nervously chuckling, Asuka quietly said, "Uhhh… Um… Okay, maybe we should worry a tiny bit…"
Chest heaving, Kaworu's drooping body gently floated in front of Lilith, with his back turned to her. Glaring defiantly into the demonic eyes of the Mass Produced Evangelion Units, the young man haughtily sneered, "I already hacked six of you bastards into pieces! What's three more?!" Tightening his grip on the true Lance of Longinus, he drew it back behind himself, readying himself for the inevitable rush of his foes.
The three final Evangelions loomed over the tiny boy, and one of them flapped its wings quickly, darting towards Tabris, better known as Kaworu.
Leaning back, the Seventeenth Angel whipped his whole body in a full circle, using his body's momentum to bring the twin pronged spear up, and half the charging, white behemoth. The acute edge of the mahogany colored lance easily slashed through the Mass Produced Evangelion Unit. Letting the shaft slip through his hand for a while, he gripped it by the very end of the staff, and spun once more, allowing the whizzing blade to gain the maximum amount of torque as he slashed horizontally through the center of the beast.
Kaworu grinned as droplets of red blood slid down the razor-edged blade, and the Eva fell into the ocean of LCL below him. "Heh, what a bunch of pushov-URGH!" Another splash of crimson washed over him, like a cresting wave. From his chest and just above the navel, he could feel two cool spires of steel tearing through him, and a spurt of blood erupting from the points that the spikes ripped through his back.
With the speed of a lightning bolt, Kaworu was impaled, and the projectile, incidentally a copy of his own weapon, carried him all the way back against his own Mother, spearing both of them. Letting loose a hacking cough, blood streamed forth from his wounds, and from his mouth. Through the cough, there seemed to be an impudent laugh still carried through his voice. "Y-You assholes… Don't w-worry… You're gonna g-get what you d-deserve. I'd rather die than give you control of my life! FUCK YOU!" With one final burst of strength, Kaworu sent his own spear towards the Evangelion that had delivered the fatal strike to him. Crackling and whizzing through the air as though it was a liquid bullet of quicksilver, the Lance of Longinus flew true to its path, and tore a gaping hole through the chest of his killer. "NOW!" he cried, using his failing voice.
Immediately, the Evangelion that he had struck seemed to spasm uncontrollably, and exploded in an orgy of blood, as its S2 engine self-destructed within it.
Eyes still blazing with defiance, he stared at the final Evangelion, as his vision blurred, and his eyelids slowly drooped shut. Garbed in tattered clothes, soaked through with blood, the scarlet liquid gently poured down his body in rivulets, and beads gradually dripped from his fingertips. As consciousness slipped away from him, a final rebellious sigh escaped from his lips. Kaworu Nagisa, in spite all of his hardened demeanor, and tough exterior, was still subject to his human-esque body, and all of its fragilities.
Had he merely been able to fight the icy hand of death back for only a few more moments, Kaworu would have been able to see the forms of both a red, and a purple giant appearing from the shadows.
A splash of scarlet washed over Shinji, as he looked on in horror at the carnage sown in Terminal Dogma. The eviscerated carcasses of white Evangelion units bobbed up and down on the rolling waves in the huge pool of LCL in front of Lilith.
"Mein Gott… Who… What could've done all of this?" Asuka whispered to herself, still looking around in amazement.
"Kaworu?! KAWORU?!?!" Shinji bellowed, as his eyes focused on Lilith, only to see the slumped form of his friend pinned to the massive Angel, via a twin pronged lance through his body. An intense conflagration of misery and rage erupted within Shinji, as he stared at the pinned child, insolently smirking, as though he had still won, despite dying. Vision blurring, Shinji let out a sorrowful scream, continually uttering the name of his fallen friend as a mantra.
Tears slipped down Asuka's pale cheeks as she stared at the young man, and the sacrifice he had made. Over the intercom, she could hear Ritsuko's voice explaining the true nature of Kaworu… and also alerting them to the fact that they weren't out of danger just yet.
Nothing got through to Shinji.
It was all just feedback noise, as he sat in his silent little world of pain and solitude. His tear streaked eyes rolled over to the final Evangelion Unit, who was circling Kaworu still, as though waiting to eat him, like the vulture it seemed to be.
"I'll kill you… I'll fucking kill you… I'll… kill… you… FUCKING BASTARD!" Shinji slammed on his controls in a primal rage, and Unit-01 responded likewise, sending itself into Berserker mode. Feeling his synch ratio rise, the usually stoic pilot whipped himself into a frenzy, launching himself upon his foe, having no regard for anything else.
Asuka could do nothing but watch, as the one she loved regressed into an animal, and viciously tore away at his enemy.
Kaworu's smirk seemed to fade, as his arms and legs dangled and swayed in the wind. Black and blue, broken boned, and pierced, Kaworu was simply left where he was, hair, though smeared with blood, still fluttering in the breeze.
And though it could have been the product of an overactive imagination, an imperceptible glow gently resonated, like tiny snowflakes of energy swirling around, until finally hitting the liquid blood of Lilith.
Over the horrific sounds of carnage and battle, Kaworu's lips curled upward ever so slightly, into a placid smile, as though he had finally found peace…
But it was all just a trick of the light…
"That irksome boy… He proved to be more of a nuisance than we had counted on… Unfortunately, our manipulations have failed… This was not according to the scenario…" Chairman Keel's voice echoed in the room with the monoliths, as he conversed with the rest of SEELE. "We shall have to try again at another time… We shall have to wait and strike quickly, and effectively. Now that Tabris is dead, we will easily be able to crush Ikari's unstable son, and bend him to our will. At least we can trust our intelligence on him… Such a lonely child will be easy to manipulate."
After a pregnant silence, he spoke once more, "The last of the Eva Series is doomed… there is nothing we can do about that, however, we are clear of blame. NERV has no way of possibly linking us to this."
As the monoliths slowly faded from sight, Keel's mechanically ghastly voice rang out one final time. "Third Impact has not been averted… only delayed."
Where are my children?
Kaworu felt warmth envelope him completely, and he felt all his pain melt away. Splattered with blood, the young Angel's leaden eyelids gradually opened, revealing the crimson orbs behind them.
Is it only you? Are you the only one who wished to return?
He couldn't even speak. When he tried, he felt himself choke on his own words. Awestricken that he was still alive, the Angel stared at the mind numbing white of the realm he was stuck in.
So even you did not wish to return…Can my children truly exist without me? We shall see… And what about you, Tabris, who is called Kaworu? Can you live without me?
Kaworu's eyes deadened and the sharp needle of death stitched him into the background, making his body dissipate into tiny particles. He had vanished completely.
You were my firstborn… You were the first to return… We shall always be together, Tabris… or Kaworu, if you prefer…You are my firstborn, and also my lastborn…
Author's Notes: Well….. Uhh… There you have it. The end. And I'm serious about that. HOWEVER, I will be writing a follow-up story to this. You'll have to really stay tuned to find it. I'm not sure when I'll get around to writing it, but I will! I promise you guys! If you all want me to, I can post an announcement at the end of this story, once I get the new one up!
Bonus: You get bonus points if you can guess what the condition that Kaworu was experiencing (where you sweat blood), and what causes it. The causes are pretty obvious, but then again, I'm the one writing it, so it may be harder than I'd think.
From the confines of his pocket, he heard the melodious ringing of his cellular phone. The young Angel brought it to his ear, and simply said, "Fuck off. I ain't gonna do your shit this time, so you can get your haggard asses out here and do this shit yourselves."
All he got in response was a tiny beep, and an animatronics voice resounding through the speakers, with its metallic qualities highlighted, "Hello, Mr. Nagisa. We are calling in lieu of Senator Takashi, who is very interested in having your vote this upcoming election. Please help to ensure another great term in office!"
"I can't even vote, you fuckhead! I'm like, fifteen!" Kaworu angrily snapped his phone shut, and silently seethed.
Again the phone rang, and he placed it against his ear, curtly saying, "What?"
"Hello, Mr. Nagisa. W-" Snap. The phone was closed once again, yet the ring tone continued playing.
Kaworu simply opened the phone and shut it once more, allowing him to seethe in silence, without interruption.
"Well? What did he say?"
"I… don't know… That troublesome child hung up on me…………… This was not part of the scenario……."
Let there be Bird-er… Peace… Yes… Peace on Earth.
Third Impact… It was a lot different than he imagined… Kaworu gazed around at all of the dead bodies lying around, and frowned. This wasn't how it was supposed to be… Who would've wanted something so messed up? Kaworu's thoughts hadn't driven this… monstrosity. He just wanted to see what would happen, you know? Curiosity got the better of him… and it was doing so once again. He wanted to know why things were this way.
A harsh squawking made him droop his head, and let out a massive sigh. Pen-Pen, wielding his razor edged switchblade, laughed ma- How can a penguin laugh? Hell if he knew… It just happened. Anyway, Pen-Pen laughed maliciously, and wiped blood off of his knife, before stepping over the mutilated carcass of both Shinji and Asuka.
"Dude… Not cool." With that said, Kaworu turned on his heel and bolted away as fast as he could possibly run.