Title: Twenty Four Hour Flu

Author: Sauv

Summary: It's a special day and Iruka is sick.

Warnings: kindasex through a door. uh huh.

Pairings: KakaIru and NaruSasu

Twenty-Four Hour Flu

But at Least His Dinner was Badass.

By: Sauv

Iruka-sensei woke up that crisp clear warm morning with a killer headache. Staring at the ceiling from where he sat up in his bed, his face felt hot and he knew it was flushed. A loud noise came from his stomach, along with a sharp pain. He put his hand there; letting it rest against the taunt, hot flesh. An even sharper pain stuck. He cried out and pulled his knees to his chest.

Oh god, he hoped he wasn't sick.

He rolled out of bed, his legs weak. Everything spun. He grabbed his bedside telling himself he was okay. He repeated it over and over in a kind of futile hope that if he said it enough times, he might start to believe it.

He managed to the kitchen without stumbling too much. He fell over the table, clutching his stomach in pain. Eyes shut tightly; he tried to stop his tears. Oh god, it hurt so badly.

He looked at his clock. It hung above his calendar, 8 o'clock in the morning. He checked the date. Shit. It was marked with a little heart. It was the anniversary of the first time Iruka and Kakashi had kissed. He had completely forgot they had made plans. Iruka was going to cook a big dinner and it was going to be romance, sex, movie, more sex, the whole deal.

Iruka felt like puking.

He ran to the bathroom and did so. He felt slightly better now that the pains had receded. Though he still felt like a run over dog, and the car was coming back for seconds. Iruka moaned, clutching the porcelain bowl hopelessly.

He washed his face and brushed his teeth slowly looking himself over in the mirror. His face was pale and almost dead looking, with dark gray smudges under his eyes, his hair in total chaos. Iruka looked like crap. He pulled his hair back into its regular ponytail and held his stomach again.

Leaning against the counter by the sink, he waited for the pain to pass, his head pounding and his forehead sweating. He hadn't gotten this sick since he was a little boy.

Iruka pushed himself to the kitchen. He didn't care if he was dead before it was over; he was going to make Kakashi-sensei one kickass dinner. He put pans on the oven with shaking hands and drew out the ingredients. Even if it took all day, he was going to make it special.



Kakashi-sensei was slightly worried. Today was a special day and he had no idea what to do about it. He could get Iruka flowers but Iruka would get mad since he wasn't a girl then Kakashi wouldn't get laid. He could get him something kinky but then the Chuunin would call him a pervert and then he probably wouldn't get laid. What else could he do?

The dilemma caused him to be standing outside the door to one Uzumaki Naruto's apartment. Who else knew Iruka-sensei better then his favorite kid? He sensed the boy in there, along with someone else. Kakashi shrugged and went to ring the doorbell. Then he heard a bang. Ninja senses made him alert and ready.

Then he heard a moan.

The perverted senses kicked in. He pressed an ear against the door and masked his presence. His eye widened.

"N-Naruto, we have to-oh god- get a-away (huff)from the (moan) door (surprised squeak). Ow." The unmistakable low, rather mean sounding voice of one Uchiha Sasuke said, though it was husky and out of breath.

"Nuh-uh. I won the fight, and we ain't moving until you say it." Naruto's voice bled through the wall, muffled slightly because of it.

"I'm not going to say it. (moangroancrybang) -oh-idiot."

"Say it Sasuke." His voice was strong and sing-songy to Sasuke's rather strained one.


"Oh-oh-oh, fine you stubborn fox sonofabitch. I hope you die a thousand painful deaths at my hand but just fucking take me already!"

Bang. Bang. Bang. Bang. Bang. Bangbangbang. Bang. Scream.

It sounded almost like "idiot" or maybe it was "ohgod." Kakashi wasn't sure, either way it wasn't the time to talk to Naruto. But…Sasuke was quite a screamer, Kakashi thought, rubbing the inside of his ear with his pinky.

Kakashi made his way to the market, hands in his pockets, bored. He had a couple of hours to spend before he went to Iruka-sensei's home. Drifting through the random stores, turning down random offers (Buy a fish on a stick, half off!) he spotted something gray and supple looking.

His eye softened when he realized it was a little stuffed dolphin.

He picked it up, stroking the top of its furry little head with one finger. He smiled. What a cute little thing. Iruka would like it. He pressed the dolphin's downy head against his lips through his mask, his eye shaping into a upside down U.

"Ma'am." He said sweetly to the old lady vendor, waving some money in one hand the dolphin in the other, "how much?"

"For a sweetheart?" She asked, wrinkles crinkling at the corner of her brown eyes as she smiled up at him. Kakashi nodded. The woman tied a ribbon around the dolphin's head.

"For the copynin's sweetheart, no cost." Kakashi bowed and walked off.


Iruka was at his wits end. Kakashi was due any minute and Iruka wasn't sure that if he let go the chair he was leaning on he was going to be able to walk to the door. His body was drained from all that cooking and working when he was sick. His throat hurt, his stomach, his head, everything hurt!

But damn, if the food didn't look excellent sitting on the table in colorful arrangements waiting to be gobbled up. Despite the pain curling in his stomach he was damned proud. He said he was going to do it, and he did!

The doorbell rang.

Iruka wobbled over, pulling at his fancy yukata he had decided to wear that Naruto had bought him. It was green and complimented his coloring. Kakashi stood there in all black, looking handsome, a little stuffed dolphin with a red ribbon tied around its neck tucked under his arm, his forehead protector gone.

"You're on time." Iruka joked then had to stop short, he was on his knees throwing up all over Kakashi-sensei's shoes.

"Uh-oh." Kakashi said as Iruka finished. He squatted down by his sick lover and rested his hand on Iruka's shoulder, the other hand holding the dolphin away from the mess. He grabbed Iruka's slimy chin with his long pale fingers and tilted his chin so Iruka's eyes met Kakashi's soft mismatched ones.

"You are sick." Kakashi stated, pushing Iruka back slightly, toeing off his disgusting shoes (wiping his toes on the carpet outside the best he could) and hopping over the mess. Iruka sniffed.

Kakashi noticed the table of food. Brown eyes met one blue and one red. They widened for Kakashi's eyes were angry.

"You've been doing this all day when you should have been resting?" He asked eyes surveying the scene, he sighed, "Come on, and let's get you to bed."

"B-but the food, I think we—"

"Iruka-sensei, stop that."

"Wha-huh?" Brown eyes were wide with fever and confusion.

"Thinking, stop. Just let me take care of you." Kakashi said in a don't-even-argue kind of voice, much different from his normal lazy tone.

Iruka was too sick to notice so he just nodded faintly, brown eyes big and hopeless looking. Kakashi took pity. He led the poor Chuunin into the large white tiled bathroom and set the stuffed dolphin on the counter along with the brown haired schoolteacher. He stripped him out of his pretty yukata gently. He grabbed a washcloth from below the sink (he knew where everything was in Iruka's room, having been there so many times, he had memorized it) and cleaned Iruka's mouth off, then his own toes. He picked up the Chuunin with ease and carried him to the bed, gently plopping him down.

He sighed inwardly, guess he really wasn't getting laid after all.

"'M sorry. You dun have to…" Iruka blinked his eyes filling slowly with helpless frustrated tears. He scrubbed them away. Kakashi kissed his forehead. He knew the Chuunin hate feeling helpless.

"I know." He said, petting Iruka's head and tucking him into the bed.

"My head hurts." The brown haired man mumbled, the covers tucked to his chin. Hazy, fever filled brown eyes met amused mismatched ones.

"Mm, it's your ponytail. It's too damned tight." Kakashi guessed sitting on the edge of the bed. He reached behind Iruka's head to undo the soft hair. It fell and framed Iruka's face. Kakashi combed through it gently with his fingers.

"I am going to make you some tea, get rid of that nasty taste in your mouth." Kakashi kissed Iruka's scar that lay over his nose and left.


As the tea brewed, the silver haired Jounin took notice of the food. It really did look delicious, he thought. Surely, a couple bites? He took one look at some of the sushi and pounced. Yummy!


He came back armed with a cup of tea and wet washcloth rolled up to find Iruka on his side, his hand clutched to the pillow tightly, the little stuffed dolphin with him (he must have gotten up to get him from the bathroom, Kakashi mused). The silver haired man helped Iruka upright into a sitting position, put the wet washcloth on his forehead and gave Iruka the tea.

"Mm, thank you." Iruka mumbled looking down right adorable, his cheeks flushed from fever.

Kakashi got up to leave back to that table full of food.

"Mmmm, stay with me?" Iruka whispered looking down at his tea.

Food, Iruka, Food, Iruka. Kakashi took off his shirt, mask and pants and clad only in boxers, sat upright, bundled the sick dolphin to his chest so Iruka lay in-between his legs and served the dolphin as a human pillow. He kissed the silky soft hair. As if it was really a challenge, food or his Iruka. Iruka slept comfortably like that, his nose halfway buried in the stuffed dolphin half way into Kakashi's stomach, as the Jounin read his favorite book. He found himself stroking Iruka's hair absent-mindedly and smiled down at him.



a little while later

"You what!" Iruka yelled his arms waving. Kakashi pulled the covers over his red nose, covering his flushed cheeks.

"I didn't know the food was contaminated." Kakashi whined, wet washcloth slipping down his forehead to the pillow. Iruka righted it, looking furious.

"I cooked it while I was coughing and wheezing everywhere!" Iruka snarled, tucking Kakashi closer into the bed. He walked away to the kitchen, bitching and mumbling about getting tea and stupid Jounins, stuffed dolphin in hand. Kakashi winked at it. It just smiled harmlessly back.

"But, it was really good." Kakashi said. Iruka paused, one foot in the air.

"What was?"

"The food." He smiled. Iruka grinned, caught himself, and huffed out the door.

"Of course it was."

"Mm, Iruka-sensei?" He asked, before Iruka could get all the way out of the door.


"I love you." Kakashi grinned under the covers as he heard Iruka's light laughter.

"I love you too, you stupid genius of a ninja." Was the last thing he heard before he drifted off to sleep, his nose buried into a pillow that smelled of Iruka.


this story took for freaking ever to put up and I'm surprised I had the patience to wait it out. Please enjoy the fanart for it, it's in my bio and it's quite lovely. The link will also lead you to the artist, who is a friend. hehe.

comments are welcome. wanted, in fact