Smarty Cat gave me the prompt "Missing Cell Phone" and I decided to get a little crazy. This is just a short little writing exercise. Hopefully it will amuse you!

Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Wing.


By Nessie

Relena Darlian was a wreck. Despite a pair of designer shoes, a thousand-dollar suit with the most fashionable cut, and hair that could only come from good breeding, she ran around her fiance's apartment in a frantic manner akin to a scared carp – with eyes just as big.

Heero Yuy, on the other hand, calmly watched her with his arm folded as he leaned against the wall of his tiny kitchenette. "Are you sure you checked your purse?" he asked in his customary monotone.

The Vice Foreign Minister sent him a look that had killed the protests of politicians but had very little effect on the ex-Gundam pilot that currently watched her. "Of course I checked it, Heero. Damn it, I am never staying the night here again!"

"You had everything with you," he replied swiftly, as though part of him hoped to quickly persuade her against that notion. "I helped you pack yesterday."

Relena nearly rolled her eyes. He said that as if it automatically meant there could be no fault whatsoever in their task. "It was only for one night! And I saw you pack my black negligee, Heero. Not my cell phone."

"You," he pointed out matter-of-factly, "were talking on your cell phone while we were packing. You kept pleading with your Foreign Minister to save the conference for today."

"Which I convinced him to!" she hissed. "But he is supposed to call in five minutes, at which time, I need to be in the car on the way to my office, and not madly going about your house looking for my blasted phone!"

Heero did not budge an inch. He had seen Relena's worry fits before. This was a tame one. "Did you look in the fridge?"

She froze in her task of rifling through his towel drawer in order to spear him with a don't-be-ridiculous stare. "Heero, honestly."

"You got up in the middle of the night." Naked, he added to himself. "You got a drink from the fridge."

"My cell phone was on the floor," she insisted. "From when you tossed it out of my pocket so you could take off my skirt."

He nearly smirked at her. "You aren't the person to knowingly leave a cell phone on the floor all night."

"I'm not looking in the fridge!" she cried. "And don't you—"

But Heero had already pulled open the refrigerator door and was moving a few items around. In the space of three seconds, he pulled out the communication device in question. "It's cold, but it's serviceable," he informed her, face deadpan.

Relena performed a full-body sigh; shoulders sagging, knees bending, head bowing. "I love you," she declared, defeated.

The phone rang in his hand, and she grabbed it from him as he bent down for a long kiss. When the third ring came, she pulled back and flipped up the lid. "Hi, Minister Rollins." She glanced at Heero with a wink and wave. Later, she mouthed to him, I'm yours.

She was out the door and down the stairs before Heero could bat an eyelash. He waited exactly four minutes before he went to the small couch he owned and lifted the briefcase Relena had flung down in order to search for her missing cell phone. Relena would be needing it in ten minutes. The least he could do was drop it off at the office for her.

After all, he had accidentally planted that cell phone in the fridge the night before.

The End