I wrote a scenario for a friend (rickmanlover24601) but I ended up writing it instead. Just a one shot. Hope you like.


Cho Chang was angry.

All she had wanted was a little comfort. Just a kiss and a hug and someone to lean on. But no. For the great Harry Potter, she wasn't good enough.

Well, fine. Let him reject her. But he would pay. Oh, how he would pay.

She smirked a little, then aimed her wand down the hallway.

"Padivus Ovine." She whispered spitefully.

The tiny pink spark that was the spell whizzed down the hallway. It was headed straight for its target, going, going… And then Cho nearly screamed. Hermione Granger had stopped Harry and imposed herself in front of him, hands on her hips.


"Honestly Harry, I can not believe that you haven't paid your dues to S.P.E.W! You know how short we are on funds this year. And you are the treasurer!" Hermione stopped. "What are you giggling about?"

Harry and Ron had both dissolved into laughter, much to Hermione's annoyance. "S.P.E.W is not a laughing matter… What are you laughing at?"

Finally, Harry calmed himself enough to choke out, "Hermione… stop talking for a minute, okay?"

Obediently, Hermione did as she was told.

"Follow me." Harry was enjoying being the bossy one for once. He set off for Dumbledore's office. When they reached the alcove with the gargoyle in it, he stopped them.

"Ron, quit laughing at Hermione."

Ron's laughter quieted.

"Can you hear yourself talking normally, Hermione?"

"Of course." Hermione replied. "Am I not?"

"Herm… you're speaking in pig latin." Harry tried to break the news gently, but couldn't restrain the amused grin that came to his lips.

"She's speaking in what?" Ron, ever-stupid when it came to the muggle world, spoke up.

"Pig latin. It's-" Hermione was shushed by Harry's hand over her mouth.

"It's a silly language that Muggles teach their kids for fun." Harry explained for her. "I suppose Wizards don't use it. The question is though, why is Hermione speaking in it without realizing it?"

Hermione sighed, looking at the ground as she thought. "Harry, you can understand me, right?"

At first she thought he must not, because he was simply staring at her. Finally he replied. "I can only understand if you speak very slowly. It's been a long time since I heard it."

"Okay." Hermione replied as Ron stared on helplessly.

"I can't understand at all!"

"Harry, teach him later. Right now, thought, we need to find a counter-curse." Hermione was trying hard to slow down her speech, but it was difficult.

Harry gave her a confused look.

Hermione sighed. "Countercurse." She said again, very slowly and deliberately.

"Right. Ron, do you know any countercurses that would fix this?" Harry asked doubtfully.

His doubts were well-founded. Ron merely shrugged.

"Well then. Shall we head to the library?" Harry didn't seem at all eager to spend his afternoon searching through dusty tomes for a vague countercurse.

"No. Flitwick." Hermione headed towards the Charms classroom.

Harry followed and Ron fell into step behind him, asking, "Where are we going?"

"She thinks that Flitwick will know how to fix it."

When they arrived, Professor Flitwick was in his office. Hermione looked to Harry to explain what they needed.

Once he had heard the problem and established that the trio had no idea who had cast the curse, the tiny wizard shook his head.

"Padivus Ovine is a difficult curse to rid yourself of, despite it's juvenile nature. It can only be removed by the caster, or- Gentlemen, could you step out of the room for a moment?"

When Harry and Ron obliged, Flitwick continued, "The other way to remove the curse is to reveal a secret to the person you would most hate to find out."

Hermione shook her head. She only had on secret like that to reveal, and if she did… Well, it would make her life miserable.

"You realize the risk, I'm sure. If by chance the person understands you when you tell them, it may complicate things for you."

Hermione nodded dejectedly.


Several hours later found Hermione standing in the dungeons with quaking knees and a beating drum in the place of her heart.

Please don't let him understand this…

"Can I help you, Miss Granger?" Professor Snape's silky tone wasn't helping Hermione at all.

"I-" Hermione stopped. "Sir, if you understand what I'm saying at all, please pretend not to."

Snape's eyes glinted. "Miss Granger, please refrain from speaking in gibberish in my presence."

With more certainty, Hermione continued, believing that Snape could not understand her. "Pro- Severus. I like you. A lot. And I wish more than anything that you would like me too, because I believe that, in some odd way, you are the most attractive man I've ever met. I'm scared of the end of this year because I know I won't have any excuse to stare at you anymore the way I do in class."

Hermione stopped, realizing she may have already gone too far.

"Professor… can you understand me?"

Then Hermione saw the last thing she had been expecting. Snape lifted his head and rather than give his usual smirk, he gave a gentle, teasing smile.

"Mis- Hermione. Even if I did not understand pig latin - which I do, by the way – you spoke the majority of that in English."

Hermione was blushing furiously. "Oh…"

"Now, rather than give you the detention you obviously deserve for – what's the term? – 'hitting on' a teacher, I want to tell you that I greatly appreciate your affections. Perhaps if you would care to repeat your little speech completely in English after graduation, I could respond more properly." Severus gave another wry smile. "Until then, please, don't let yourself in my office alone again. It's much too… tempting."

Hermione smiled back. She would have to locate whoever cast this curse and thank them, because she was definitely going to be back in this office after graduation and had the feeling that his reaction would definitely be positive.

"I'll see you again at the end of the year then, Professor."


A/N: Thanks for reading! Please review!