Disclaimer: I own nothing. I don't even own the plot, cuz there isn't one.


Here, we compare Jack with Pete.

Pete: can shoot a gun

Jack: can kill an alien with a really big gun

Pete: is short

Jack: is tall

Pete: was in, like, 10 episodes, maybe

Jack: was in, like, 180 episodes

Pete: is played by a guy who was in a dog food commercial

Jack: is played by a guy who was in a MasterCard commercial

Pete: is played by a commercial guy

Jack: is played by MacGyver

Pete: bought a great big house

Jack: already has a cool house

Pete: listens to…. Something

Jack: listens to Opera

Pete: was introduced to Sam through a friend

Jack: was introduced to Sam by force (air in particular)

Pete: thinks Sam is beautiful

Jack: thinks Sam is beautiful and incredibly awesome

Pete: is frightened by alphabetized bookshelves

Jack: probably has alphabetized bookshelves because Sam went over there and alphabetized his books

Pete: is played be a guy who is only on Stargate because of his brother

Jack: is played by a guy who is on Stargate because he's awesome

Pete: makes a fool of himself when talking to Jacob

Jack: is on good enough terms with Jacob that he calls him 'Dad'

Pete: Calls Sam repeatedly at work

Jack: works with Sam, and leaves her alone when she says so

Pete: barely survived nearly dying

Jack: made it through dying who knows how many times

Pete: has a name beginning with 'P', which when added to the beginning and 'S' to the end could make 'piss'

Jack: has a name beginning 'J', which when added to the beginning and 'S' to the end could make 'jewels'

Pete: makes jokes at the totally wrong time

Jack: makes jokes all the time

Pete: has to stoop the staking out a stakeout

Jack: is in on the original stakeout

Pete: only has clearance though default because he was stupid

Jack: has clearance because they wanted him on the SGC program

Pete: is kind of a nice guy actually

Jack: is just so much cooler though