I'm updating more than once in a given six month period. 2012, people, it's happening.
Disclaimer: Johnny the Homicidal Maniac would not be nearly as amusing (though would be less prone to grammar and spelling mistakes) if I were the one who wrote it.
Jonny held chloe like she was the only thing that mattered. Squee is half in his lap getting a look at her.
"why is sh wrinkly?" he asks.
"She's a babby," jonny says. "Babbys do that."
Squee stared at her aa bit longer. "Can I hold her?"
A million scenarios fly through Johnny's head. Squee could drop her. Squee can decide he hates her and htrow her to the is defenseless and his, and squee could hurt her.
But he wouldn't, on purpose.
Johnny hands her over and squee looks terrified.
Cloe starts crying.
"I didn't mean to break it!" Squee exclaimed.
Johnny took her back and started hushing her, but idoesn't work.
Devi appears from nowhere, looking very cross. "Johnny, what did you do?" she asked. "I don't do anything!" Johnny said. "Ibroket the baby," Squee said. "Jesus," Devi muttered. She snatched Chloe from Johnny and started cooing. Chloe stopped fussing. "Honestly," Devi said. "You can't do anything right."
Johnny looked chastened. "I'm sorry."
"Should be," Devi grumbled. "C'mon, baby girl. I bet your hungry."
Jonny stared after her, feeling very stupid. "How is sh so good?" he asked no one. "She's a mom," Squee said, shrugging. "Your mom sucks at taking care of you."
Squee looked very sad.
"Soryr." Johnny said. "I take care of you." Squee smiled.
"yeah, I know. You'll be a good dad."
Johnny hoped so. HE really hoped so.
Continuing the super-short trend, as well as the 'I can't hold all the tenses!' trend. Catch you later.